Half a decade ago, I wrote an article about model minority. In that article I was explaining how as a minority and marginalized group, we are often expected to be "nicer about it". Ofc when I wrote that, it was from the perspective of oppressor v oppressed. But recently I realized I was wrong, the angle was supposed to be norm v outlier.
A group of people may not have the systemic power to oppress you, but they can isolate you. So when a lot of normative Butchfemme Lesbians like to say, "we can't oppress you! We're the minority!" it doesn't really matter, because non-normative Butchfemmes, those who are bisexual, trans, genderdiverse, genderqueer, non-whitewashed BIPOCs, have consistently shared how they're being harassed and cast aside from Butchfemme spaces.
With that, the burden to educate people fall onto them, along with the scrutiny, the -phobia, the harassment, the racism even. Through it all, they are still expected to "explain nicely" because what if people are curious?
Why does the burden to extend patience and understanding for bigoted and harmful people fall onto the persons being affected, and not the Community's responsibility to sit down and listen?
When they do talk about their experiences, it gets shut down, twisted, even ignored. The only time they are talked about is when they loudly take up space, and even then, it was accompanied by numerous pushbacks and harassment.
It's definitely interesting how the Community that started out to be an inclusive space for non-normative queer people, are now casting away most of their members towards the edge of conversation, and pretend they don't exist. All in the name of preserving said community from "cisheteropatriarchy".
