Oct 10, 2025
am still laughing at how i told a pal two people we know are splitting up. opened with do you remember (insert names here) and then.
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am still laughing at how i told a pal two people we know are splitting up. opened with do you remember (insert names here) and then.
Demure Ginger
men actually love getting divorced, it's a right of passage for them. it's when boys become men
Put another log on the fire.
So I've had a hell of a year and I am so SOOO done.
After 13 years together, my husband told me he no longer loves me and feels like I trapped him with our kids. (And is holding grudges from things said or done 10+ years ago that I had every right to say or react in the way I did)
At this point we will probably have to just split and I hate that for our kids but he has been financially abusive for years and sees no problem with blowing "his" money and not paying bills and getting angry that I stay home with our kids and he has to pay for my phone bill....(when his parents still pay for his)
I hate this for our kids and I feel like our whole relationship has been built on a lie and i am so lost and confused. I always thought he was a good guy. He loved me and respected me. But apparently he never actually listened to me when I talked and only respected me to get what he wanted and now he doesn't want me anymore so time for me to leave.
I am so fucking hurt for my kids and for our lives. His parents are so angry with him and don't understand what he is thinking. He practically abandoned us a month ago and had slowly tried to be around for the kids this last week but it isn't the same.
My friends pay pal'd me money so the kids could get Christmas because he kept blowing money on hotels and mobile games.
I appreciate them so much but I'm still so hurt that they even had to feel the need to help.
I just wanted a nice holiday because my depression was actually good and I was looking forward to Christmas this year....but no. He couldn't even wait until January to drop this on me.
Why is my heart filled with so much sorrow and grief today? Memories and words fly through my mind like tiny flies. Buzzing and bouncing around inside my head in random patterns.
At first a kind of sad nostalgia came over me. But as the days of this week has gone by, the thoughts has left a heavy feeling in my soul.
I guess I am sort of lying when I say that I don't know what caused this. But I do. This week has been stressful. In so many ways. But today also marks the day of the end of the trial period of my divorce. And from today, we can send in the finalization of the divorce. I've printed the form out, bought stamps and an envelope. I've filled out my part of the form. Now I only have get my ex to sign. And then send it off to court. It all feels surreal. Just calling him "my ex" feels so unreal. 11 years together, 8 years married. And in four weeks, I am divorced. A single mom. A free woman. With a broken heart and a bruised trust. Never having to walk on eggshells or being afraid of the silent treatment.
Free to be my true self again.
I just felt the need to vent. Put my thoughts into words.
Take care. / ☕