ꪆৎ gabriella ٠࣪⭑ she/her ⭑ you can read my novel here! 📖
about me! girlblogger, professional fangirl, over-thinker, italian, puerto rican & indonesian, reading, writing, volleyball, indie music, rock music, jewelry maker, summer, pinterest, hockey, spotify ৻ꪆ
music! inhaler, oasis, nghfb, the stone roses, the beatles, the sex pistols, blur, pink floyd, villanelle, automotion, fob, billy idol, bon jovi, guns n’ roses, lana del rey, ethel cain, clairo, abba, wunderhorse, the royston club, cardinals, no doubt, cigarettes after sex, the clash, the cure, sam fender, nieve ella, blossoms, malcolm todd, audrey hobert, mj, alessi rose, role model ৻ꪆ
!! looking for moots !! asks are open if you ever wanna chat 😌❤️
Summary: surprising Ryan as the special guest for Dublin In Ecstasy.
Warnings: fluff, some light angst
Wordcount: 1.7k
Masterlist, Inhaler Masterlist
At the beginning of their relationship, they both agreed to keep it on the low. Sure, fans had seen them together when walking into a venue together before an Inhaler concert or when they recognized Ryan on the street. But it was never more than that. No outright posts or confirmations, only occasional sightings.
Having no outward social job made it easier to keep their privacy. There were no more eyes on them than necessary and no person spoke about what might go on between them behind closed doors.
Although, over time, it became tiring at times. Finding a new job which brought new engagement to her life made her realize how much she missed posting dumb photos of them at times. Not to show off, but rather to appreciate what she had found with him.
"Don't you ever just want to scream out loud how much you're in love?" A co-worker asked one day and since then the thoughts wouldn't get out of her head anymore.
She understood his point of view. The last time he was in a public relationship, it didn't work out and when everyone found out, they kept asking what happened. Not getting over them as quickly as they got over themselves. It was more exhausting in the end to handle the Internet's reaction over the break-up than their actual emotions.
Not wanting to pressure him into anything, she stayed quiet. Slightly heartbroken every time she saw one of her friends unapologetically posting with their partner.
Ryan noticed it almost immediately, the way she got more distant when they were out together and eyes lit up when seeing him. Where she once stood beside him when fans came up to ask for a picture and say hi, she now took a step back. Leaving him space he didn't want.
"Am I too dramatic about it?" she asked Grace one late night when the two of them accompanied the guys for a few shows. "I don't want to pressure him into anything, I just would like to be more out in the open with it. I never felt like it was necessary though recently I felt the need of posting stuff more than before. I don't know if that makes sense to be honest. It's hard to explain."
"I totally get it, Ryan will too," Grace said, putting her hand over the girl's. "You just have to tell him and he will waste no second in making a whole dump about you, I promise. I mean, it only took about two minutes for me to convince Eli that I wanted to post him on my socials. It's not like you're now posting the other now whenever they move, just a little nod of acknowledgment to the world every once in a while."
"Yeah, I'll talk with him about it once tour is over just in case."
"Or…" Grace raised her eyebrows in suggestion as an idea hit her. The girl always had the craziest ideas though barely anyone took them serious, not even her at times.
Standing up from where they were sat on the coach in the bus while making their way to the next destination, she began making her way across the bus with quick steps. Coming back with an excited smile, dragging a confused Eli behind her. Pulling him down to sit next to them, she started explaining the situation to him first. Telling Eli about her fears of Ryan's opinion while the other girl tried making her stop talking out of embarrassment.
"I thought, since you talked about getting Tom and Myles to do the Dublin In Ecstasy part in Amsterdam, what about her doing it in Berlin tomorrow?" Grace suggested.
"Yeah, absolutely not," she immediately answered as Eli didn't looked half as shocked and mortified at the idea as her.
Though it was a rejection, Grace was still looking between the two of them excitedly. Eyes wide in anticipation as if her answer didn't count.
"We could make that work," Eli finally settled on, making Grace jump into his arms, before turning to her friend to gush about what she should say.
"I hate you, Hewson," she said as Eli made his way back towards the other lads.
Now, a day later, she was standing in front of the little box Eli always stood up on. Fingers nervously fidgeting while Grace talked her ear off on how iconic it would be. Ryan had no idea and she didn't want to ruin anything that was between them with a little bit of attention on their little world.
"You have to calm down, it's gonna be amazing," Grace kept on telling her. Trying to calm her nerves and make her feel a bit more confident with all the other people around them. "We can go further away from barriers once it's over and you can have a drink or something."
"This is insane."
Dropping her head, she almost missed how the lights dimmed again. If it wasn't for the thousand people around her starting to get even more excited than before. The stage turned blue and slowly, one by one, the guys walked on stage. Waving and smiling at the crowd as they got into their places. The two girls at the front cheering with the crowd.
For a song or two everything was fine. Enjoying herself in the middle of the pit and dancing like this was any other evening made the nerves walk away, leaving her alone and at peace. Though the moment she heard the familiar guitar riff starting, the nerves came back. Anticipation crawling up her spine. Unease following rather quickly.
And before she knew it, Eli was leaning over the barriers. His body closer to Grace, but the mic was angled towards her. The couple exchanged a look before he asked the first question.
"What's your name?"
Like he didn't know.
With a shaky voice, she told the crowd. Looking past Eli, who leaned back for her to have a better view, towards Ryan, whose head perked up at his girlfriend's voice. A smile grazing his face as they locked eyes. And that was all it took for her to get the adrenaline flowing through her veins.
They had discussed a few things she could say to him - most ideas were thrown in by Grace and quickly thrown out the window by her.
"Is there anything you'd like to say to Berlin tonight?" Eli asked, not aware of what they had settled on. "You can say anything." Reminding her again to get the options open.
After a moment of silence, she finally spoke into the mic again. Her voice booming through the venue as she leaned closer, speaking louder to make sure that it was heard. Looking straight at Ryan who tried his best to stay focused on the task at hand and not messing up his part.
"Your drummer's hot!"
Eli laughed at her statement. All three of them looking at Ryan who looked down at his drum pad, shaking his head and blushing even under the dark lights.
"Your friend's cute too," Eli finally said, winking at Grace who hit his arm in response.
"You know the song? I hope so."
After the show was done, both of the girls were waiting backstage. Still pumped with adrenaline from the show they spent the rest of a little back further into the crowd but still staying in the middle of it all.
As the guys came walking in, two of them were immediately drawn towards them. Looking up at Ryan, the anxiety that occupied the silence around her quickly vanished as he pulled her in for a kiss.
Mumbling against her lips, "You're a maniac."
"I just wanna make it clear that it wasn't my idea."
And by the innocent looks Grace and Eli tried to fake, it was painfully obvious who pulled the treads in that play.
"All of you are maniacs then," Ryan corrected himself.
"Well, we're gonna give you time to talk." Then they disappeared towards the other side of the room.
Sitting down Ryan made himself comfortable, leaning his head on her shoulder in exhaustion and placing a leg on her thigh. His fingers drawing shapes over her jeans to calm her down. He knew how she was feeling without having to ask about it.
"Are you mad?"
His head perked up at the question, furrowing his eyebrows he quickly shook hie head. "No, not at all. It was fun. I just didn't expect it at all." Laughing at the memory, he recalled another one. "You almost made me mess up my part."
"I'm sorry," she mumbled against his hair. Taking his hand in hers and starting to play with his fingers. "I was just thinking about something the last few days."
"What?"
Taking in a deep breath, she tried putting her thoughts into words without making it come out as desperate. "I know that you don't really want this to be all out in the open and I love our privacy and everything, but lately I've just been craving to post about it every once in a while. Not full on every hour or so, but just whenever I take a good photo of you or sum. I don't know."
"And I thought you wanted to break up with me." Though he was laughing against her shoulder, she could feel the instant relief taking over his body as she didn't confirm his assumptions.
"What? Why would you think that?"
"You just stepped away when someone recognized us."
"I-" she couldn't even explain the action herself. "I don't know what I was doing then to be honest. I just thought it would fit in with what you said you wanted."
"I never want you to step back from me."
Placing another kiss on her lips, Ryan held her jaw with his fingers.
"I've been thinking about it too, you know? Posting you," he confessed. "Ever since I took that picture of you when we were at dinner and I thought it looked too good to just stay in my gallery."
"You can post it still."
"Oh, I will," he said, already pulling out his phone to search for the picture in his phone. "As I will with the other 200 pictures I've got of you."
Picking out the picture he'd mentioned and captioning it, 'This girl called me hot.' before quickly posting it so she couldn't say anything against it as he could already feel her eyes growing wide at the caption.
