Summary: Robb is desperate to woo you and stupidly, he goes to Theon for advice.
Warnings: Pre-season one/early seasons Theon, Theon giving awful advice, Robb listening to the previously stated awful advice, Miscommunication, Inconsistencies in the tense it’s written in
Notes: Reader is a ward and Robb may be just a tiny bit OOC for his show version.
Word Count: 2.6k
STARKMAS 2025 , MASTER POST , ASOIAF MASTERLIST
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Robb Stark was confident, he was well aware that he was good looking and that he had a well defined physique. But for whatever reason, anytime he tried to speak with you, that confidence vanished.
You were his mothers ward who had moved to the North when you were just young. It was easy to talk to you when he was younger, when you were both just children. There was no pressure to be perfect then, but now that you had both grown, Robb was determined to be perfect for you. He was determined to make you swoon.
Marriage was something that Robb was always aware about, as the heir to Winterfell and future Warden of the North, he would have to wed. At different feasts and gatherings other Northern lords and ladies would practically throw their daughters at him but none of them stuck. Ned was not blind when it came to young love and he could see the way his son stared at you. So after much discussion with him as well as Catelyn, Robb would be allowed to begin courting you.
But even with permission from his parents, Robb still struggled. So rather than going to Sansa who was your closest friend or his father who had experience in winning a woman’s heart, he went to Theon for advice. Looking back on it, it was an awful idea and even Robb thought some—all—of what Theon suggested was…questionable.
“Girls don’t like it when you’re real sweet on them, it makes you look weak.”
“Steal her books when she’s reading! Hold 'em above her head to show off your height!”
“Be cold, act as though you don’t care what she thinks, that drives girls mad.”
“Every other Lord and Lordling is going to be playing for her hand the same nice way, tease her, annoy her, that way you’ll stand out.”
“Telling a girl you hate her dress is the fastest way to get her naked, even if you love her dress.”
Robb did scold Theon for that last one. In fact, Robb didn’t like any of the advice. It went against everything his father had raised him to be. Robb didn’t want to tease you, to annoy you, or treat you badly. But Theon was older so against his better judgement, Robb trusted him.
It had started off simple, with Robb hardly looking at you at the dining table. Every time he would, Theon would kick his shin to remind him that he’s meant to be ignoring you. It was getting hard though, especially when he saw the small frown on your face out of the corner of his eye. You managed to quickly put on a smile and go back to your conversation with Sansa but still you’d glance at him every few moments to see if he was looking over. Then it escalated, Robb would take your quills during lessons and even your books.
Little did he know that you went to Sansa’s chambers to complain about his behavior.
“I just don’t understand,” you say softly before flopping onto her bed.
Lady who was laying down on the floor came over to nudge her nose against your leg, just like the other wolves, Lady always craved attention. Lady and Grey Wind were particularly needy when it came to wanting you to pet them and you always welcomed them.
“I’ve been telling you for years that he’s a fool. How in love you are with him…it will never make sense to me.”
You pull your head up and sigh, “You don’t get it because he’s your brother,” you sit up before reaching down to pet Lady’s head, “it would be weird if you got it.”
“Regardless, he’s an idiot. Especially with how he’s acting now.”
“He isn’t acting like himself!” you say, frustrated, "he’s acting like…Theon…Gods, I miss him being sweet like when he’d pull out my chair for me in the morning, when he’d get my cloak for me if we were all to go out, when he brought me flowers because I was sad—now he won’t even look at me!”
“Like I said, idiot.”
“I’ve always thought…I thought maybe was courting me…maybe unofficially until he would ask properly but now…I think he hates me!”
You sigh once more and pull your legs to your chest. Sansa could tell how upset you were and as your best friend, she wanted nothing more than to cheer you up.
“Tonight,” she says, changing the subject, “Father said that Maester Luwin believes it’ll snow a lot tonight, that lots will stick. Tomorrow we’ll go play in the snow, we can build how we used to!”
“Really?” you perk up a bit, your lip quirking up into a small smile.
You weren’t sure if it had to do with the fact that you moved to the North at such a young age but you absolutely adored the snow and the cold which was something that set you apart from the other Southern ladies. Just another reason that Robb had fallen hopelessly in love with you.
Sansa nods, smiling excitedly at the idea of getting to play in the snow and at the fact she had managed to make you smile.
True to her word, before you would even wake normally, Sansa was knocking on your door to go outside. You both bundled in your warmest furs and made your way down to the courtyard which was coated in fresh snow. You found a nice spot off to the side where you wouldn’t be in anyone’s way if people had to get through quickly. But you knew the Starks, and you knew the Starklings; when it snowed this way, you would all often play in the courtyard rather than go to your lessons.
Jon and Robb were always early risers but it seemed they had been woken even earlier by Arya, Bran, and Rickon who wanted to have a snowball fight. You were sure that Lord and Lady Stark would soon find their way outside as well as watch over everyone with fond eyes.
You noted Sansa’s watchful gaze on you when Robb had entered the courtyard. But if he wouldn’t look at you, you wouldn’t look at him either. Instead, you focused your attention entirely on the snow castle in front of you. Since you had gotten outside, you and Sansa had been working on creating a minarture Winterfell. Your fingers were freezing but it was well worth it.
You could hear the laughter from the youngest Starks who were pelting their eldest brothers with snow. You did want to join them but you couldn’t, you wouldn’t.
Theon was the last one to rise as per usual and he grinned at Robb when he entered the courtyard. He grumbles when he’s pelted with snow by Bran but it just makes him grin as he gets an idea after seeing the snow castle.
The snowball fight stops but only for a second so that Theon is able to talk to Robb, “This is your chance,”
“What?”
“Throw some snow at them while they’re working on whatever it is they’re making,” he half points towards you and Sansa.
“Do not do that,” Jon cuts in, “you’re just gonna make her mad, and Sansa too.”
“That’s the point,” Theon says as if it’s obvious, “Girls love that.”
“I don’t think they do,” Jon answers, making Theon narrow his eyes at him.
“And what do you know about girls, Snow?”
“Clearly more than you, Greyjoy.”
“Alright, enough!” Robb says suddenly, “I…I don’t like that idea Theon, I don’t want her to hate me.”
“You want her to think she does, but all that frustration is going to manefist…” Theon does a gesture making Jon roll his eyes.
“I told you to stop talking about her like that,” Robb reminds the Greyjoy boy who clicks his tongue in response.
“Fine, fine, but trust me,” Theon bends down to pick up a handful of snow, “you’ll be thanking me!” and then he tosses it towards you.
The snow hits you in the back of the head making you and Sansa both screech. You turn to look over your shoulder and when you do, you’re hit right in the face with more snow. And finally, a third snowball is thrown, landing right in the middle of the miniature Winterfell. When you wipe the snow from your eyes you see Robb, standing front and center and Theon behind him laughing. Rickon, Arya, and Bran all begin to laugh as well making the humiliation sting even more.
“They’re playing now too!” Rickon giggles, running over to you so he can throw snow as well.
Bran and Arya follow suit, now tossing snowballs at Sansa as well. And pretty soon, the tiny Winterfell you had spent all morning making, was completely destroyed.
You sit in shock for a minute before Sansa shoves Arya away, yelling at her in a way that told Arya this wasn’t her older sister's usual anger or annoyance. That's when the younger girl finally looks at you, hair dripping wet with melted snow, red cheeks, and the tiny tears that were pricking the corners of your eyes.
Arya backs away and tugs Bran with her, “Let’s go play somewhere else,” Rickon was a bit confused by the sudden change but follows anyways.
Sansa pulls you up from the ground and looks at her older brother. Robb looks like a kicked puppy as Theon drags him away cackling, Jon right behind them shaking his head.
You were more chilled now, some of the snow had snuck its way under your furs and melted, effectively freezing you. You quickly make your way back to your chambers to get out of the wet clothes. You were angry, it took you and Sansa so long to build that castle. You wouldn’t have been as bad if it was an accident but you knew it was intentional from Theon’s laughter. Most of all, you felt humiliated, the boy you’ve fancied since you arrived at Winterfell had purposefully embarrassed you in front of everyone in the courtyard, you were humiliated in front of him.
Sansa had offered to stay with you, to help you change but you declined the offer, stating that you wanted to be alone. So she decided she was going to confront Robb on the matter. It was easy enough to find him, he was sitting outside sulking as well. Theon and Jon took one look at the angry expression on her face and bolted.
“What is wrong with you?” she asks, crossing her arms.
“I just—“
“You just what? You’ve been acting like…like…like an arse lately! You’ve been treating her terribly!”
“I—“
“I’m telling father about this! And mother too! They would never allow you to treat anyone that way, especially a lady!” she spins on her heel.
“Wait! Sansa, please!” Robb sighs, “I just, I like her a lot…”
Sansa narrows her eyes and turns back around, “You what? You like her?”
“Yes, I want…I would like to court her…to marry her…I don’t just like her, I’m in love with her.”
Sansa laughs at the ridiculousness, “You’re in love with her but you’ve been stealing her things? You’ve been taunting her endlessly? You’ve been ignoring her? And now today, you humiliate her!”
“I was just doing what Theon said I should!”
“You went to Theon for advice?” She asks, exasperated.
“He has experience with women!”
Sansa scoffs, “With whores,” she whispers, “whores he has paid to spend time with him… to… engage… in acts…”
She shakes her head, no longer whispering, “Gods, you’re an absolute moron! You should have come to me! Or father!”
“You? You would have told her immediately!”
“Oh I would not have!”
“Yes you would have!”
“The most I would have done is made sure she wore her best dress and had her hair done perfectly when you’d ask!”
“I’m sure,” he rolls his eyes, leaning back before sighing, “It doesn’t matter now, I’ve ruined it by being a fool.”
“You’ve embarrassed her, Robb… and…” She pauses, not wanting to betray her friend's trust but on the other hand, she wanted to help her brother right his wrong.
“And?”
“And…she’s fancied you for ages, that’s why she’s so upset. You need to fix this.”
“She fancies me?”
Sansa nods.
“She actually fancies me?!”
“Yes, Gods, Robb. I just said that.”
“I need to fix this.”
“I just said that as well.”
Now that Robb was aware that he had fucked up, he was determined to fix it. Then he would make you swoon.
He was done with Theon’s advice.
While many would have seen Robb heading to your chambers alone as improper or scandalous, he couldn’t bring himself to care. He needed to fix this immediately. But he knew that you wouldn’t open the door for him.
“Go away Lady!” You yell when you hear a direwolf whining outside your door.
The wolf does not leave and begins to paw at the door. Letting out a sigh, you get up from your bed. You did love the wolves and their company so maybe cuddling with Lady would make you feel better. But when you open the door you’re not greeted by Lady, you’re greeted by Grey Wind who is holding a single red rose in his mouth.
As upset as you were with Robb, you could never be upset with his direwolf. You let out a little laugh, and crouch down to pat his head before taking the rose from his mouth. Grey Wind makes a noise of content and walks into the room, he stretches out by the fire. Robb would definitely be searching for his wolf soon and you grin at the idea of him running around frantically looking.
You stand quickly, ready to shut the door and trap Grey Wind in your chambers but before you can, Robb appears in the doorway.
“Please don’t shut the door.”
He’s holding a bouquet of red roses and a plate of your favorite strawberry tarts. You look at him, then at the flower in your hand, then at Grey Wind, and then at him once more.
“Why shouldn’t I?”
“Because I’m in love with you.”
“Robb—“
“I think I always have been, ever since you first came to Winterfell. Since the day you got out of your carriage I have loved you.”
You're silent and Robb feels as though he is going to cry, perhaps Sansa had lied to him as a cruel joke, a way to get revenge for what had happened in the courtyard.
“Say something please,” he begs.
“You humiliated me today, you’ve been treating me awful for the past week. How does that in any way convey that you love me?”
“And I am so sorry for that… I just, I wanted so badly to impress you and I took advice from Theon which I shouldn’t have… I actually wasn’t the one to throw the snow, that was Theon… I should have just spoken with you or Sansa… or anyone other than Theon.”
“You went to Theon… for advice?”
“Yes… I know—“
“Theon… Greyjoy?”
“Do you know any other Theon’s?” he asks with a hesitant smile.
A hesitant smile that was contagious as it took over your face as you began to laugh, “You’re an idiot, Robb Stark.”
His face flushes bright red, making you laugh more. You take the plate of tarts from him and set them to the side before taking the roses as well.
“You’re an idiot, but you’re my idiot.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah,” You smile, allowing him to pull you into a hug which you practically melt into.
Robb looks down at you in his arms and holds you tighter before leaning down and pressing a kiss to your head, “Perhaps Theon was helpful…” he jests.
happy tdov!!! here is my reminder that suns, wind, and inno are all canonically referred to by they/them pronouns!! an angel gains its wings every time they are gendered correctly
theon greyjoy has a sleep paralysis demon and it’s the shape of man wrapped in furs with a direwolf’s head instead of his own. the direwolf has the saddest eyes and curly red fur and theon doesn’t sleep anymore
I didn't post in a while - because of job and life - but in the little breaks of life and job I started to draw this. Hopefully I will finish it next week - because of Easter Holliday 🤞
this is pretty old art of Robb i did but i never posted it or anything so enjoy i guess! i also did a similar one for Daenerys but i cant find it AHHHHHHH😡
#project hail mary
#the amazing digital circus
#photography
