#grim is thinking

[scrivenger-grimgar]

au of an au for mdzs where canon plays out exactly as it was supposed to except

wwx became a calamity after dying and cared for his coven of ghosts in yiling before mxy summoned him for revenge.

he still elopes with lwj after solving the corpse question

supreme ghosts have a similar ability to gods taking deputies, except since they're not sharing immortality they can have a lot more of them

wwx's "deputies" are (in order) jiang cheng, the wen remnants, luo qingyang, nie huaisang, mo xuanyu, jin ling, lan jingyi, ouyang zhizhen, lan sizhui, and lan wangji.

being a calamity's "deputy" means that you are soul bonded to them, with a kind of preternatural sense of the wellbeing of the entire coven.

one of the heavenly officials decides to fuck around with time, and only other heavenly officials were supposed to remember, except extremely strong ghosts and their covens also remember because there are TWO gods married to calamities, and calamities are weirdly cooperative with each other (hc, hx, wwx, & gL discuss trade agreements over tea and artistic process over alcohol).

thus like 75 people are now in the past.

wwx's child body cant stand the power his soul has and just kinda crumbles under the weight. thats mostly fine tho cause he can shapeshift.

of course he immediately comes up with a dastardly plan to inflict as much chaos onto the sects as possible while also protecting his loved ones at the same time. he gets in contact with the wen remnants (bigger and there's more of them) and slowly moves them over to yiling while he builds places for them to live on the mountain, and then offers the people of yiling a very good deal:

"we'll deal with all your ghost problems for free, and in exchange we get discounts on food, and you tell everyone who comes asking that the Yiling Wei sect has been here the entire time."

its almost too easy to set up, too. they forge some trade agreements and other documents to place in the other sects' files, waiting to be found, with ease, bc he knows what the filing for the jiang, lan, wen, and nie looks like, and part of the story is that the jin offended them so badly that they just stopped doing business with them altogether and also tend to actively hate them with few exceptions.

meanwhile, huaisang, qingyang, and wangji will reference the Yiling Wei and act like this is something everyone knows about, and jiang cheng catches on and starts doing the same.

wwx's plan is to drive them all insane by appearing out of nowhere and acting like he's been there the entire time. make them question reality.

wen popo, at a discussion conference: i'll be standing in for my grandson so he can participate in the games

jiang fengmian, initiating polite conversation: your grandson? what happened to your son?

wen popo, internally cackling: fengmian! are you so quick to discard changze like this?! for shame!!

jiang fengmian, who has never met this lady: what

wen popo: you know i trusted him when he said he wanted to stand by his sworn brother's side but if this is how you treat his memory after he was so unwaveringly loyal to you, only ever leaving for Cangse, the love of his life, then i'll have to have you stricken from the legacy registry!

wen popo, with unfaltering confidence: good evening wen-zhongzhu

wen ruohan, who has incurable face blindness: well met Wei-zhongzhu (do i know her???)

nie mingjue is the only one who's taking any of this well and thats solely because his brother has been spoon feeding him Yiling Wei propaganda for 13 years. lan xichen has a crisis because his baby brother eloped with a clan leader he met thrice and they're having a spring wedding.

[scrivenger-grimgar]

I have so many thoughts about Senju Tobirama. so many.

He's albino, so his eyesight sucks ass and that's the main reason his chakra sensing is so highly developed.

He's like Toph but with water, and also able to see coloured blurry blobs.

Bright light hurts his eyes and can cause migraines.

He gets sunburned so SO easily, and his skin is sensitive to certain materials.

Only has half-siblings because Butsuma was not very loyal to his actual wife, but it was ignored so long as Butsuma brought them into the family.

Altogether Butsuma had eight kids; Hashirama (the only actual legitimate child & full-blood Senju), Tobirama and Kawarama (half-Hatake fraternal twins), Itama (non-clan civilian mother), Ichigo (half-Uzumaki half-Hatake mother), Sado (Senju mother), Karin (civilian Nara mother), and Yuzu (Shiranui mother).

Ichigo is two years older than Hashirama and Sado, and Itama, Karin, and Yuzu are all the same age.

Ichigo was able to take Sado, Yuzu, and Karin to Uzushio to keep them safe but Butsuma caught on and almost cut his head off when he tried to take Itama.

Tobirama is autistic. He is so autistic, trust me bro. He sucks at expressing and identifying emotions (both his and others), and it doesn't help that he has resting bitch face. Anyways, it's because he's autistic that he's practically immune to genjutsu bc his brain is wired differently.

Sometimes, he just gotta scream, or just make noise.

Hashirama has and will grow cotton specifically for Tobirama because he thinks it's a Good Texure. His clothes are soft cotton, his blanket is soft cotton, his futon is soft cotton, every cloth piece is soft cotton because it's a very easy gift for holidays because it's very well known.

Hated shoes as a toddler, and absolutely refused to wear them. he still prefers to walk around barefoot if he can get away with it.

His armor is actually heavier than normal Senju armor bc he likes the weight, it's calming, like his dry bean weighted blanket that Sado and Hashirama made him.

Uses his fur mantle as Good Texure, and will fiddle with it and tug on it if he feels safe. Torifu and Kagami find this very charming.

Will only ever write with chakra-infused ink because that's the only way he can read, through his sensing.

Has, on more than one occasion, told someone to shut up even though they weren't talking, because they were thinking so much it was affecting their chakra, which came across as 'noisy' to Tobi's senses.

Could not feasibly live alone, it would be too quiet to his senses and drive him insane. Once Hashi and Mito get married he moves in with Touka.

Suiton natured, he's figured out how to boil and freeze water by adding and removing energy, which entirely changed the games he could play. with that chakric law broken, he starts breaking more because "why not?"

He then figured out how to: mummify a body by sucking all the moisture out of them, drown someone on land by directing fluid to their lungs, boil someone from the inside out, turn someone into a pincushion by freezing their blood, and tear the blood out of someone's body. the only prerequisite to any of these techniques is to touch the target and create a "backdoor" for his chakra to enter their body.

[scrivenger-grimgar]

concept: persona 5 protagonist has always been able to see using the third eye. tracks from the people he's looking for, fingerprints on code locks, whether doors and windows are unlocked, injuries that people have, whether people have noticed him or not; he's always been able to see the world washed of colour, things of importance glowing in bright neon tones around him. the floating cards were always a bit weird, only some people have them, most don't, and they only make sense when he looks up each card's meaning. and then the fog rolls in and people start dying, and now some of the card people have figures that follow them around. he is 11 years old and has no clue what's going on, but the crow guy that he meets is very cool, which might be narcissism because they are apparently one and the same.

[scrivenger-grimgar]

i like viewing the p5 protag as autistic (along with yusuke and futaba), but he specifically has difficulty speaking. he can speak, but he tends to do so in short bursts; thats not the extent of his speaking ability, just the articulated part. the dialogue options chosen ingame are spoken like a neurotypical, but its very short and precise, deliberate, and it takes a lot of his social spoons to do. when with people he's comfortable with (the thieves, chihaya, sojiro, shinya, kaoru, lavenza) his speech changes. its longer sentences than before, but his words are slurred together, he takes out grammatical points to put only the bare minimum, and its very quiet, almost mumbled.

maybe turns into mayb, goodnight becomes nigh, its good to see you becomes 'sgood tsee ye.

even the thieves names change when he says them.

'taba, ryuj, makot, 'usuke, har, ang, mogan, gor, sumre, 'nkich, and 'phia. shaya, s'jiro, shin'aa, kaor, venz.

everyone has a Joker certified slurred name. its a sign of affection! he's comfy with you!

[scrivenger-grimgar]

So we know the language barrier au, but how about meme synchrony au?

Inexplicably, internet history is practically the same in both worlds, but memes are just more obscure internet culture for wonderland. Kinda like it’s own subculture, and there are just less people who are chronically online.

Most people know a few memes at least, bottle flip, ice bucket, cinnamon challenge, etc.

Enter yuu, extremely involved in fandom, parody, etc. the pinnacle meme connoisseur. A person who’s coping mechanism is memes.

There is maximum one person in each dorm who can understand the shit they say. As Azul would put it, “It’s like Idia-san, but worse.”

Those people are: Cater, Ruggie, Azul (a case of extreme exposure), Kalim, Vil, and Lilia. (Ignihyde automatically does not count.)

Cater and Ruggie can and will speak memes. Vil could speak memes if he wanted to. Kalim and Azul understand but cannot speak memes. Lilia speaks memes often but it’s jarring and off putting because he combines it with several centuries worth of outdated slang.

Yuu: *is late to the meet up* sup

Ace: dude, you coulda gotten here sooner!

Yuu: *gestures at grim* I do not control the rate at which lobsters die

Deuce: what

—

Yuu: *stares dead-eyed into their potion* guac-amole, gua gua-camole~

—

Yuu: *being heckled by savannaclaw*

Yuu: *pulls out air horn* get FUCked

—

Grim: yeah the first time they saw you guys they just said “enemies to lovers 30k slow burn bromance” real quietly

Adeuce: they fucking WHAT

—

Yuu: *in sam’s shop for the first time*

Yuu: *whispers* I’m buying clothes at the soup store!

—

(In the crucible)

Yuu: *physically restraining themselves from adding SO MUCH vanilla extract*

—

(Post-book 5)

Yuu: *whispering to rook* kill John Lennon

Rook: ???

Yuu: *louder* kiLL JOHN LENNON

—

(At VDC practice)

Yuu: I’m vil schoenheit and I’ll be your free style dance teacher

—

Yuu: *thinking of adeuce* who painted the Mona Lisa…

Deuce: *actually answering* uhm… da vinkee?

Yuu: ASDFGHJKLL

[scrivenger-grimgar]

ok but, yuuji as a four-eyed tiger spirit with pink fur representing cherry blossoms and spring and new beginnings and change and growth, with the Itadori family being a family of priests blessed by yuuji and serving his ideals of positivity, kindness, and freedom of choice. yuuji's three forms, a four-eyed pink-haired human teenager with black nails and a sharp-toothed grin, a four-eyed six-legged pink tiger the size of an ox (built like a thanator/palu'lukan), and then a pink tiger centaur that's half of each of the previous forms. the counterpart to Sukuna's destruction and winter and cruelty and control, they balance each other, unable to destroy one another; their relationship would be like dazai and chuuya from bsd, they hate each other love each other would die for the other.

inspired by the child with marks on ao3

[scrivenger-grimgar]

venti is a trickster god.

from what i can remember of his misadventures off the top of my head, venti:

chose to steal a lyre that he owned, (from a church where he is worshiped, from people who are entirely devoted to him) rather than seriously reveal himself as barbatos. because he thought is would be fun.

created a minor illusion over the aforementioned lyre when it is damaged by d’valin, knowing full well that it wouldn’t last.

is able to shape-shift, which he probably takes full advantage of.

is able to fly, and potentially become invisible (based on the lack of elemental sprites you encounter in the world).

is able to eavesdrop via wind currents; he knows all the good gossip, but with his emotional intelligence he probably helps his people indirectly by providing advice as “venti”.

claims to have stolen the cryo archon’s staff and replaced it with a hillichurl club.

occasionally pilfers bits and pieces from the ragnvindr estate when he feels like it; he knows that they’re rich enough to handle that much with no issues.

regularly steals and then sells items from the Lawrence’s; he keeps ⅓ of the mora, gives 1/6 to the church, 1/6 to the knights, and uses the remaining ⅓ to pay for housing and food for the poor folks in mondstadt.

is casually able to forge signatures; he forged morax’s signature so well that morax was the only one who could tell that it was fake.

replicated a blessed object like a vision perfect enough to only be revealed by a chance phenomena, and transfigures the replica vision into a lyre frequently and consistently mid battle.

reacted to the aristocracy’s takeover of mondstadt by using devastating methods, such as criminal mischief, breaking and entering, trespassing on “private” property, attempting a jail break, inciting a riot, and fabrication of evidence. he then immediately overthrew the government.

in conclusion, venti is an Anarchist Seraphim Trickster God, and he can get more than a little ambiguously threatening sometimes.

[scrivenger-grimgar]

hey Mik! ( @give-grian-rights ) , heres a twist for your Blood God Grian AU:

Grian makes trips to the nether every 20-50-ish years; its his job to fix up nether fortresses and bastions, giving the blazes something to guard, keeping the skeletons’ old homes tidy and stable for them in their afterlife, and repairing damage to the piglins’ temples sustained after battles with ghasts. its his job as the current Nether Watcher, like its Philza’s job to keep the jungle temples traps operational, and Taurtis’ job to maintain the valuables in End Cities.

one day, during one of his sporadic visits to the Nether, maybe 470-ish years after Evo, he is amused to find a single strange tiny piglin child following him around. its adorable, the kid looks like he’s barely six years old, and he’s clumsily hobbling after Grian with scuffed iron boots clinking together and a golden helm falling over his eyes, several sizes too large. the kid has a golden sword, badly worn but still plenty deadly, hanging loosely in his grip as he tries to stealthily maneuver behind him.

it goes from cute to worrying when Grian leaves the area after fixing up the bastion, heading towards the next, with the kid still following him.

where is this child’s pack? Grian thinks, as the child follows him, step for step. he ignores it for now, starting his work, still feeling vaguely bemused that the piglins would carve a stylized portrait of his face onto the blackstone for him to find when he returned.

after two more bastions and much more walking, the child eventually does something other than tail him, though not what Grian expected; instead of returning from the direction he’d came, the kid ran at him surprisingly fast and swung his blade at him. Grian didn’t bother to dodge, swiftly turning and blocking the blade with one netherite clad arm. the blow is unexpectedly powerful but ultimately pointless, glancing off the black metal easily.

Grian smiles at the kid, voicing a soft, “not quite,” as the piglin child looks up at him with shock. and now that Grian’s looking right at the kid, he can tell that somethings not quite right; his skin is a bit too pale, hands a bit too dexterous, ears a bit too low, and eyes a bit too black.

this isn’t a normal piglin child, Grian realizes as he stares at the soft pink hair falling in tangles from underneath the helm, this is a player.

he hears a cry, a ghast, and doesn’t even try to look up before wrapping his grey webbed wings tightly around the child. the fire charge burns him, scorching the webbing a mottled speckled black, but it would’ve killed the kid, and he regrets nothing.

sweeping the kid behind him, he raises his [Dragon Bown], knocks an arrow, and sends it straight into the ghast’s eye. it squeals, crying and quivering, and Grian takes the time to grab the child and run.

thus is the story of how Grian accidentally adopts child!Technoblade. Phil wont stop laughing at how he just snatched a fucking child, and Taurtis is too busy giving said child End City leved armor because “he’s obviously a little killer in the making, mr. blood god” Domrao has to be called out of Watcher Retirement because Grian can only work part-time now that he’s raising a child, but eventually Grian gets to laugh at Philza when he gets a short note that only says: “cant work; busy with new kids -PM”

Taurtis, Grian, and Philza each have different kinds of wings!

Taurtis has white bee-like wings, good for hovering and maneuvering in the small halls and corridors of the End Cities. Can’t go very far all at once, but very fast!

Grian has speckled grey dragon wings, long hooked talons on all five digits so that he can easily cling to the walls of the nether. A perfect balance of agility and distance.

Philza has big black vulture wings, perfect for soaring long distances while using minimal energy. He has a hard time in tight spaces.