#hyperbole

[titleknown]

...Can we all agree it's bullshit that we as a culture didn't raise the sort of stink over Chuck E Cheese removing the animatronics that we did over Cracker Barrel changing its logo, despite the former action being a million times more grotesque an act of cultural vandalism?

[nemfrog]

Empire pencils tower over all. Empire Pencil Co. Catalog. ca. 1940.

Internet Archive

[jerryterry]

There's one post I see often. I'll describe it: it starts off with a screenshot from the movie "Seven Samurai", specifically showing the line "two or three samurai won't suffice".

Now, if you recognize the movie, this is funny. I haven't seen it myself but there's a clear dramatic irony present for someone watching the film and knowing its title. But what if you don't recognize it? Well, thankfully the OP has added a helpful caption: "watching Seven Samurai". A funny post! But hang on.

This is quite a dry caption. Perhaps a joke, but only a truly Inquisitive Mind would think to look at the shown quote, compare it to the title of its source, and calculate the Samurai Deficit for a sensible chuckle. Perhaps OP simply wanted to share a random frame from the movie they were watching? Well, worry not! This is where Addition #1 comes in with a useful hint for those a little slower on the draw: "I wonder how many they'll need". If the Original Post had been a Professor Layton puzzle, this would definitely be the first available hint. It points you in the right direction. "Maybe there's something here worth pondering", it begs. And oh boy does it beg!

Ahhjh, but wa... whag i... whatt if THIS addition also wasn't a joke? What if this was simply a concerned onlooker worried about the stated lack of samurai? "Oh no!", they may have been thinking, "if two or three samurai won't suffice, how many could they possiblgy neesd?" and ohooHOO dear reader now here's where tbings get FUNNY. Thankfully a wonderful Second Addittion (remrember Rule Of Three in comedy??) comes jingling in, bells on its hat and shoes, eyes performatively rollign up around its skull, and it so so so so so sweetly delivers our punchline: "i hesitate to even speculate". This, I believe (and I may be wrong, in which case a tghird addition is needed), is sarcasm. OH. OH MYBGOD what fools the other two posters had been to have missed the Irony under their noses. OP presumably dropped their mug tonthe ground and it smashed into little pieves and on the bottkm it said "SEVEN" (this thing I said is actually quite clever too, if youbknow you know 😌) and oh WOW what a powerhouse trio. "You set em up, and you also set em up, and buddy i knock em down!"

And honestly, this is the only possible case I can imagine. Tumblr's ability to prune annoying and unecessary comments like invasive weeds is second to none, especially on my well-curated dashboard. If these two comments were truly just redundant, annoying nothings that suck any potential amusement out of the post and leave behind only an unfunny dead horse and nail-marks in my palms, they would've been burned off like leeches SOMEWHERE in the rigorous peer-review process! But instead, this configuration of the post regularly crosses my feed from several of the bloggers whose sensibilities I've come to know and respect. And what a useful utility I've been given! Because rather than hiring an expensive therapist, I can simply gauge how mentally-unsound I am at any given time by whether this post flows off of my back like water OR causes me to grit my teeth and ball my fists and scream into the sky "WHY???? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU? JUST REBLOG THE FIRST POST!! FREE IT FROM ITS BALL AND CHAIN, LET IT BE FUNNY AGAIN, PLEASE GOD!!!!"

Thankfully it seems today I am doing well, as I just scrolled past without a second thought :)

[vintage-tigre]

[calware]

no matter how detailed the style gets i am NEVER going to draw the bridge of these glasses. those things are meant to be two featureless rectangles and nothing more

[spitblaze]

if you tell a trans women that she looks bad with her hair in a ponytail i hope you die and go to hell

[incognitopolls]

How is "hyperbole" pronounced?

Hi-per-bowl

Hi-per-bao-el

Hi-per-bowl-ee

Hi-per-bowl-ay

Hi-per-bowl-uh

Secret 6th way

Voting ended onJun 18, 2024

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[brother-tansie]

I love hyperbole; I use hyperbole one million times a day