I really am blessed to have an amazing endocrinologist. I have read so many horror stories about skeptical doctors, uncooperative doctors, and doctors who are just plain jerks. If I think we should test something, I say, "I know I'm not a medical doctor and I read this on the internet. . .but what do you think of this?" She explains why she is or isn't in favor of the test, describes experiences she's had in the past, but ultimately leaves it up to me. I really want to move out of this area, but I don't want to leave my doctors!
My doctor called with my results immediately to let me know that the chances that my nodules are cancerous are VERY LOW. I was still pretty nervous and worried, but I've since calmed down a bit. My TSH is still extremely hyperthyroid and it all makes sense now. The nodules on my thyroid are producing way too much thyroid hormone. She has no idea why I tested as hypothyroid a few years ago, even though I had the nodules at the time. She wasn't my doctor then, so it's very mysterious. Since I've seen her, she's been testing me every 3 months to see if my levels have fluctuated and I've tested hyperthyroid each time.
I'm very relieved about the low risk of cancer. I still need to have a hemi-thyroidectomy, because the nodules haven't stopped growing. I don't want to spend the rest of my life monitoring the size, taking medication to regulate them, and getting regular biopsies. If I can avoid all of this and return back to a more normal life, I am all for it. Surgery will also put my mind at 100% rest about the possibility of cancer (It's at about 90% rest so that's bearable).
Until I'm able to have surgery, my doctor has put me on beta blockers. Parallel to this, I've been seeing a psychiatrist. I was hooked up to a machine for ADHD testing, and some indicators were high, others were moderate, and others were low. He prescribed Ritalin, but I had to wait 12 or 24 hours before the pharmacy would fill my prescription. In that time, I saw my endocrinologist with my full results, and she informed me that hyperthyroid patients are often diagnosed with ADHD, even though they don't have it - the hyperthyroidism has some of the same symptoms. This explains so much for me. I haven't been able to concentrate or do anything productive, to the point that I went to a psychiatrist because I was so bothered by it but could not control it.
Beta blockers are also good because my pulse has been between 90-122 bpm. Since starting on the medicine a couple of days ago, i'm now 70-80 bpm at rest. The first two days I was even more exhausted than usual, but now I'm just kind of exhausted. If you know anything about my life, 'kind of exhausted' is actually a good thing. It's way better than my usual level of exhaustion. A REALLY good thing (and probably related) is that I've woken up in the morning and haven't used every bit of energy to get myself out of bed. I'm actually awake! My body doesn't need to roll over and go to sleep, although mentally, I think it's having a hard time adapting to that. It's only been a few days, but I really hope this gets better every day. I have noticed that I'm able to focus more. I've actually been productive, not extremely, mind you, but getting ANYTHING done is pretty much a miracle for me right now.
I'm told that I'll see similar improvements once my nodules are removed, so I'm really looking forward to that. I'm not looking forward to the actual surgery and recovery part, but it's a means to a better life. I really hope it is, anyway.