#intj anger

[barkzoilist]

For a long time, anger was something to hide, to ignore. The sweetness of it, the fire burning through your heart, spreading through your body. The tears that feel like they are close to boiling. But it's not something to hide. If you try to fit all of it inside, deep down where you can't see it, it will eventually consume you. Use it to fuel what you want to achieve. Spit in the face of fate and scream at god, because life will bend to your will.

[thewoodsinnewbarktown]

As an INTJ who’s come a long way living with a mental disorder of being emotionally unstable, some days still aren’t too easy. The only negative emotion I’ve felt since November (which is when the best improvement really took place) is occasional anger. It’s kinda flared up again the past 3 days as I’m clearly seeing how I’m a rare bird in society and am disconnected in social settings that I’d ideally be able to contribute to. But nah - nearly all minds around me are on a very different wavelength. 

But this music recommended by my friend @vilcade the other day is a great representation for how my anger should be - instead of getting out of control it should be focused, measured and systematic. 

To quote another INTJ, “To deal with emotions like anger, therefore, I have to address either my choice of values or the stimuli I encounter.” 

[ithappenedtheotherday]

INTJ Anger

Constantly annoyed by many little things. Nearly never actually 'angry' or 'mad' but to see us angry is a very big deal.

[intruitive]

INTJ Levels of Anger

2-second Annoyance: someone cuts in front of them, doesn’t hold the door, etc. The INTJ huffs, grumbles a bit, then moves on.

What Even: someone tries to insult the INTJ, but INTJ is not affected, simply wanting for that person to quit so that INTJ can get on with important things.

*Heaves a Sigh*: someone won’t stop gossiping, pestering INTJ, etc. Sigh is often internal, and INTJ slips away from the conversation.

Extended *Heaves a Sigh*: person mentioned above keeps hounding INTJ, who then tries to avoid all future encounters with the person.

Frustration at Self: INTJ can’t get the notes right/solve a problem/do something right. There’s some self-hate, but will get over it either by going at the problem until it’s fixed, or backing off and gaining perspective.

Brief(ish) Spat: INTJ is drawn into an argument that is a) personal from the beginning or b) starts out as a logical, rational debate but disintegrates. INTJ gives dirty looks, perhaps biting remarks, retreats for a while. Most times the relationship returns to normal, but it can also escalate.

I Hate You So Much: Often a result of unresolved conversations, festering feelings, you know the drill. INTJ will tear the other person to shreds. Normally to get to this level, person must personally insult INTJ or their friends, or break a promise.

You’re Dead to Me: INTJ does everything possible to keep this person out of their line of vision. The person has stopped being worth the INTJ’s time and thoughts. Happens because someone does something against INTJ’s morals/ethics, for example betrayal, bullying, hypocrisy.

[misadventureswithintjs]

INTJs Under Stress

Ni: Okay I’m gonna plan this, and then a step after this, and then another step after this, and then MAYBE after being 132 steps ahead of the game THINGS WILL BE OKAY

Te: You little fuckshits better start making sense right fucking now or I swear to fucking god I’m moving off this planet

Fi: That’s it I don’t give a fucking fuck what any of you want, I’m gonna do what I feel is right, fuck it fuck it

Se: DROWN ME IN ALCOHOL

[thebluesqueen]

INTJ Redheads

The INTJ MBTI is characterized as expressing little to no emotion and generally these types are considered emotionally stable people.  I am an INTJ, and tend to fall in line with this general assumption except for when it comes to anger.  Perhaps it is just me and my personal background and mental health and/or emotional maturity level, but I really seem to have a short temper!  The strongest emotion I feel, or at least express most often is anger.  Of all the emotions, I can usually subdue them into submission and deal with them appropriately, but when I get mad, logic can really be thrown out the window, or expressed so intensely, one may be under the impression I am attacking them.  I tend to be direct and blunt anyway, but when I get angry, a floodgate of expression is poured out to any bystander.

I hate to play to stereotypes, because I truly strive to evaluate an individual based on our one on one interaction, not pre-judge someone before we have had the chance to communicate.  Yes, some people unfortunately fall into a stereotype, but I always allow people to show themselves first before making a judgment.  Some people show their true character all too quickly, whether they realize it or not, and as a result I tend too judge quite quickly in response ;)

Anyway, I am also a redhead!  Do I have a short temper because of this or is it just more a result from my upbringing and background?  Rage and anger issues were a bit of a problem there, but no one else in my immediate family is a redhead, so what gives? 

What do you think about an INTJ redhead?  I would enjoy the insight of others, as long as it is presented logically.  If it is not, I will dismiss you as a typical idiot, and most likely never take your opinions seriously again ;)  Of course I do enjoy some good dry humor and clever sarcastic jokes are always welcome!!

[intj-confessions]

Hello. Have you or your followers noticed that INTJs stay angry for longer than other types? What about a correlation between INTJs and anger (get angry quickly, stay angry, hold grudges, get angry with people, get angry with objects etc)?

Holding grudges is really more of an Si-user thing, since they are constantly referencing back to past events. While INTJs can be incredibly short with people, and our anger can be pretty fierce, we tend not to hold grudges. We do, however, write people off as useless/worthless/untrustworthy/etc. That’s not the same thing though.

Re: getting angry with objects, this is known to occur when INTJs are extremely stressed and in the grips of their lower Se function.

[intj-confessions]

Wrath of the INTJ

Anon Asked:

I haven't seen this so sorry if it's been asked before... Can you describe INTJ's and anger? Ex. I've never not tested as INTJ, but I'm fairly confident in my ability to communicate feelings. However, anger gets me. It takes a hell of a lot, but when I snap I use every bit of my intellect to tear apart the other person's foundations. I know exactly what to say, how to say it, and I make it sting. It's not that I regret saying it, I just typically regret hurting the other person...

We have an enormously terrifying capacity to hit people where it really hurts simply by speaking the cold, calculated truths we know they'd rather not hear. It's important not to, as it can completely break relationships beyond repair. If you do blow up it's best to apologize just to make the peace, even if you don't mean it. You can at least apologize for your outburst, if not the arguments you made.

Most of the time I'm able to contain my anger, which I vent at a later time to my husband or sister. Venting is extremely important and therapeutic to me. If I don't get it out somehow it will just stew and fester and eventually boil over into passive aggressive comments or something far worse.

How do you display anger?