#intp issues

[thatalmostopsorceress]

INTP Stereotypes vs Actual INTP

1. Socially awkward - Yes

2. Thinks they're smart - Yep, kinda

3. Appears to be aloof but is actually just a dork - I suppose so

4. Doesn't really like physical affection - Okay, I love physical affection. Like, a lot. I'm reeeeally physically affectionate with my mom, and I hug my friends a lot... But sometimes (for example, a friend just leans on me with their whole body) I'll feel quite uncomfortable, probably because I'm not used to the feeling.

5. Doesn't like sports - Mostly, but basketball is fun (UPDATE: I like sports more. I used to really hate P.E. and stuff, but now I've realized sports are a great way to de-stress and dodgeball is actually fun when you dare to throw balls!)

6. Likes playing games and coding - Yes

7. Is often late - Yes, sometimes

8. Forgetful - Very.

9. Lazy - Yep

10. Types in full sentences with flawless grammar - This used to be me, but not anymore

11. Bad with emotions - Yep. It's hard to understand my / others' feelings sometimes, and I have emotional breakdowns. Where I just cry in the shower. Not fun. Sometimes it feels like a small thing can just break my entire being down, while other times it's like I'm an impenetrable wall. (Update: While sometimes I feel as if emotions are useless, as of late I've learnt that emotions are valuable and give us the ability to live life more enjoyably. Emotions might just be worth the pain..)

[intrpspection]

In response to a a comment on this post.

@intp-again

WARNING: This may come out as jumbled thoughts. I hope I make sense.

People-pleasing is a physical way to express care for those around us. 

I think that because we (INTP’s collectively) tend to have issues with expressing our emotions (especially verbally) we use to the physicality of people-pleasing to show care for people in a way we KNOW other people will recognize.

I also kinda went Google adventure crazy and I found this in relation to your second question...

“INTP’s will naturally value their top three functions a great deal...  As a result, INTP’s can see their inferior Extraverted Feeling as intrusive, meddling, people-pleasing and desperate to be liked.” (source)

So essentially, yes, Fe “gets in the way”, but seeing it as a positive or a negative is up to you as an individual. 

All that being said, it is possible to let people-pleasing go to far... in the sense of over extending yourself or never doing things that YOU enjoy anymore. I’ve done it. It is not a good situation to be in. Personally, I’m still working on a good balance for myself.

[intpatypical]

Patronizing Adult Advice to young INTPs should include this: so much in life is not about what is true, and it is instead about what is useful or which side are you on.

I know you’ll probably find repulsive (at some level) to curtail your words or actions to what is useful, or to have to take sides, but what is useful and which side are you (or other people) perceived to be on is part of the Truth you want to investigate, and what’s more, it’s objective. It is what it is and it doesn’t change according to your mental categories.

So if you cut off that side of life from your interactions and analysis, you will not only be scarcely successful in communicating your ideas, but your ideas themselves will be too warped by subjectivity and incomplete.

[intpatypical]

I’m trying to talk to people and react to situations in an emotionally intelligent way. The only result I’m seeing is that the OH SHIT I GOT IT WRONG moment comes faster than usual.

[intpatypical]

Not pointing out our friends’ mistakes and flaws of reasoning isn’t beneficial in the longterm, however the whole “I’m not on your side if you’re wrong” behavior might ultimately be a narcissistic statement.

[intpatypical]

Logic as an excuse

Ten years ago, I got angry with people who said things like “I don’t like reading because I like being active” (stupid!)  or “I don’t like fantasy because it’s unrealistic” (banal! tautological!) or “I like combining tradition and modernity” (contradictory!). At some level, I “didn’t understand” what they were trying to communicate and worked myself into a state of thinking their words were gibberish. Which I think didn’t contribute to my (oh so vaste) popularity.

These days, there’s still a part of me that thinks people blabber; I guess it shows on this blog too. I still get annoyed. However 1) it rarely escalates to full-blown rage; 2) I’m aware that, while the logical flaws may be present, I might be ignoring the context or subtext and focusing on the “skeleton” of what is being said because I don’t like the real message.

I love reading (and I have a wacko temper) so I might be annoyed by people declaring they hate it and notice they’re focusing on the stupid criticism “reading is not active”; the truth, though, is they mean phisically active, and if you absolutely require physically stimulating hobbies then maybe reading is not suited to your personality.

I love fantasy, so I focus on the tautology “fantasy is unrealistic”; the subtext though is “I prefer realistic settings and I’m bored by outlandish or mythological themes”.

If you “combine tradition and modernity” you’re arguably already violating tradition; I’m focusing on the contradiction. The real message, though, is “I like some novelty, but I prefer gradual change and I’ll never discard some old stuff”. Which is what most humans do anyway; but I prefer to ignore it because I’m attached to the idea of change/progress and see traditionalism as wrong.

In other words, I think I’ve got slightly better at being aware that sometimes “logic” is an excuse to discard content we don’t like in a visceral or value-based way.

[aelyna315]

I cannot be the only female INTP out here who loves makeup? Seriously! Do you not realise how technical and fascinating it is? The cultural, sociological, and psychological impact makeup has had over the eons? How easy it is to change perceptions of yourself when you know how? How easy it is to run social experiments? Makeup’s great - you’re missing out.

[loganvok]

What stresses out an INTP:

Being in an environment where they feel controlled by others.

Not being allowed to go with the flow of the moment.

Being required to do simple and repetitive tasks.

Being surrounded by individuals they see as incompetent.

A lack of autonomy.

Being in charge of the quality of another person’s work.

Not enough alone time. Too much extraverting.

Being immersed in emotionally charged environments.

Being in a place where their expertise is not appreciated.

People “barging in” on their space.

Not having their strongly held values validated.

came from mbtigarden.