So I saw this post and wanted to take some time to reflect on it.
Lately, the premed student MCAT studying burnout has really been getting to me and my self esteem has taken a major hit.
I constantly feel stupid due to struggling in my classes despite putting in insane amounts of time and effort. At some point, I had a whole spiral over how maybe I've never even been smart.
Self-love felt so far, and I didn't feel worthy or deserving of it.
So then I ended up crying to my friend about. About how I felt stupid. How I'm never going to be anything, let alone a doctor.
And then they mentioned that if, by my logic, I am stupid, then I would have to consider them stupid too. This really shocked me. I have the highest regard for my friend, they're smart in a variety of ways. So how could I be holding myself up to a framework by which this belief about my friend could not be upheld?
If I consider myself stupid, then in order to be consistent in my worldview, I must consider my friend stupid also, which I could not reconcile.
A few days later, I saw this post, and it really helped me understand where I was going wrong.
To be unkind to myself would justify extending that lack of kindness to those around me. I cannot believe that I will be a failure without believing that the people around me will be failures too.
I may care about myself and my own feelings less than I should, but it's good for me to remember that I cannot be kind to others while being unkind to myself.