Can you acknowledge me as a trans person? Even if I act and look like a girl and have a hijab? in my religion, It's a sin and, I don't look like anything masculine. I just, want someone to tell me I can still be trans even though I never come out or transition, because, I can't. Even after being away from my parents (I still live with them) I won't come out. I don't think it's worth losing everyone, and I don't think it's worth it because in the end I will just blame myself for ruining everything.
Everyone has sinned at least once, and being a sinner doesn't mean I still don't have that belief. But people say I am either not Muslim (there isn't any force in my religion, no one can decide if you believe or not, but somehow some people still loves to talk for god) or I am not queer because I mostly act upon my beliefs (ofc nothing hateful! I hope you or anyone doesn't get prejudiced about us because of some people who claim to be religious but still judge and hate)
And I am bi. And I feel shitty no matter what. Like in the middle, not accepted in anything. Like if I am one, I can't be the other, and I know I can't, I know I need to choose something, but I can't because I love my religion, it helped me much, I felt happy each time I pray, but I also want to feel comfortable in my skin and,
I need someone to tell me I am worth something, anything, even though I am the way I am.
If that makes sense, I am not American, sorry for shitty sentences.
And now I am crying. I am sorry.
And i would appreciate it if you answer or acknowledge this ask at least, because, I was very nervous and scared to ask this even in anon, because I wear hijab and religious in a sense and I can't help but feel like you would judge or not like me at all, I know you can't hate someone anon because you don't know me, but I still feel so bad because of this, I am sorry. I know I am just someone in Tumblr and nothing that important but, you helped me a lot and I don't want to say anything wrong that could make you feel bad.
You don't have to answer if you don't want to, I am sorry.
First, I want you to know that you are absolutely valid <3. Even as you are right now, even if you never choose to do anything differently, you are trans and you are bi, and that's totally okay and perfect. You are always loved and accepted and important here.
Second, I know that I will never fully understand the turmoil you're experiencing. I can't even imagine how difficult it is to feel like you're caught between two worlds- your religion and your queer identity. But I do want to gently remind you that there are Muslim people who are religious who are queer. I don't pretend to know much about the Muslim faith, so I don't know exactly what is taught about sin and queerness, but it might be helpful for you to look online to see if you could find some of those Muslim and queer people to see how they feel about sin, and how they approach it.
Whatever you do though, please know that you are valid just as you are <3