#missiletoe fic

[missiletoe]

Taeho Gyeon, The World's Most Unwitting and Unwilling Matchmaker

Taeho wants to fucking die. He was warned of many things by his father before joining the Aberrant corps–weak teammates, reckless criminals, heartless instructors. Getting trapped in a shoddy knockoff of a shojo manga was not one of them.

woe hand jumper crack be upon thee

[missiletoe]

I Won't Say (I'm in Love)

Jihye Lee is one of the first to know but one of the last to accept it.

People say that you should never meet your heroes. She argues that you should never meet your heroes’ taste in men, because that is infinitely worse.

Or 7 times people realized Kim Dokja and Yu Junghyeok were in love and 1 time they figured it out for themselves.

[missiletoe]

Of Maid Outfits and Other Frilly Things

“It comes with stockings!” Phoenix cries and indeed it does–pastel pink stockings that match the bodice. Extremely thin pink stockings that you could probably rip if you pulled too hard. “And it’s got some sort of neck… thing? It’s like your cravat!”

If Phoenix Wright thinks that the distinguished silk cravat he wears to court is anything like this white lace bib? choker? on display, then his sense of fashion is even worse than Edgeworth thought. The bar is already low but Phoenix somehow still manages to duck under it.

“No,” Edgeworth says and he feels like a broken record, stuck on repeat. Phoenix wriggles his eyebrows in a manner that he probably thinks is suggestive. In reality, his eyebrows look more like caterpillars writhing in agony. “No.”

call me a chef with the way i am cooking 👨‍🍳 i hope my sister wakes up to this on her dash and has an aneurysm

[missiletoe]

baby, it's cold outside

“Oh,” someone says and Phoenix glances up to find Edgeworth lingering like some sort of vulture. His face is screwed up like he’s being burned by their proximity. “I didn’t mean to intrude. I just… don’t have a car right now.”

And you don’t have any friends to call either, Phoenix fills in easily. Because you salted and burned every bridge in existence. Typical Edgeworth.

Maya’s eyes sparkle as she glances between the two of them.

“You can come too, Mr. Edgeworth! Phoenix promised he’d take me boating out on Gourdy Lake,” she says and Phoenix’s head snaps around, lightning-quick. When did I promise that? And why does Maya think it’s a good idea to invite him, of all people, especially after the day we’ve had?

i posted this as a christmas present for @mayarri so this is super late iM SORRY

[missiletoe]

How to Confess to Your Childhood Friend: A Guide by Miles Edgeworth

Miles Edgeworth decides that he is going to confess to Phoenix Wright with all the fanfare of a funeral.

Or: Edgeworth decides to confess to Phoenix and it goes about as well as you might expect.

[missiletoe]

hell is here in your arms (because i know i'll have to leave them)

“I’m sorry,” she whispers, the words hollow. I’m sorry doesn’t even begin to cut it. I’m sorry doesn’t encapsulate I’m tired of this war and I can’t fight anymore for a cause that I can’t even pinpoint and I’m sick of losing but that’s all I can do–lose and lose and lose and lose and now I’ll lose you too.

They’re not soldiers. They’re just kids who never really had a chance to grow up. Can’t we just run away somewhere together–just the two of us? she thinks although she does not voice the words because she is stupid but not a fool. She knows it is an impossible paradox.

There is no peace in war.

they actually rewire my brain chemistry please send help 😭😭😭 this fic is also like 10x edgier than it needs to be LMAO

[missiletoe]

conception

“They have a word for you in our language,” he says instead and he does not miss the way Ego’s ears perk up. “Fou.”

Ego scoffs. Noel knows that he cannot possibly understand the word, but the intention carries through in his tone regardless.

“They have a word for me in my language too,” Ego replies stiffly. “Tensai.”

WOOOOOOOO THE EGO/NOEL FIC NOBODY ASKED FOR

[missiletoe]

as promised, here's the kunigiri hiking fic o7

up and down and up again

“Five,” Chigiri hisses. “Do you see how many other people are here at five in the fucking morning to walk around? None! Because they’re all sane people!”

“Hey, there’s an old couple over there,” Kunigami says, pointing to two figures down by the pier. “That could be us in uh, 50 years.”

“It won’t be,” Chigiri snaps back. “Because if you ever drag me on a hike at 5 am when we’re 80, I’ll end you myself.”