Cumplane and their Cold Ass Big Titty Goth Wife™
🧊🥒🐹
For @xxmiserysmilesxx


#interview with the vampire#iwtv#amc tvl#jacob anderson#sam reid




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Cumplane and their Cold Ass Big Titty Goth Wife™
🧊🥒🐹
For @xxmiserysmilesxx
The lack of shipping wars in the Scum Villian fandom is really fucking funny because we all ship different people with the main character Shen Qingqiu, and instead of fighting about it, we collectively decided that he deserves to have a harem consisting of every single guy in the book.
I see plenty of modern AUs w Shen Yuan and Airplane besties, and enjoy them immensely. However. I would like to see Shen Yuan and Mobei Jun besties. They went to the same rich kid school and spent a lot of time in the same hospital (SY for his general ill health, MBJ bc his uncle keeps trying to Count Olaf him). They’re both ostracized for being weird so they try being weird together. Shen Yuan is always cold and Mobei Jun is always overheating so they end up developing casual platonic intimacy. Everyone assumes they’re dating because they’re always touching and holding each other. Especially good if they play opposite Airplane and the horrible little middle schooler he babysits/mentors bc he’s friends with the kid’s poor mom and she’s always busy at the laundromat. They’re both there just coping and seething watching the most obviously together gay couple walk around holding hands and being hot. Airplane is trying to become their third while Bunhe is trying to become Shen Yuan’s live in aid. Airplane will drive to the MoShen residence to pick up Bunhe from the single afternoon SY agreed to let him clean and Bunhe cries the entire car ride home because MoShen fell asleep cuddling on the couch.
Actually finished the doodle!!! Anyways, inspired by when I used to share a bed with my brother and cold feet and hands... NOPE. NUH UH.
Pretty sure it's fannon (or it's a headcannon I like a whole lot) that Mobei Jun runs cold, so here's something inspired by that
I think it would be funny if they started being comfortable enough to share a bed in the summer, so everything is fine for a bit. And then fall comes (or they stay the night at the Northern Palace) and Shen Yuan is just like, "Blanket. You're too fucking cold." (In my heart he's a very picky sleeper)
Mobei Jun just got used to the weird soft bed these people use as well. Now he's got another weird habit to get used to? Uhg.
Anyways in spirit this works for cumplane day 2, but this isn't cumplane centric so I'm not going to tag it. I am so happy seeing all of the art and fics being done for cumplane week though!!!
the devil: tell me your greatest desire, your vilest fantasy 😈
my brain: hhaougha…
this is actually so fucking funny, i guess it's a good thing they have sy as a buffer in changing drifts lmao
And if I tell y'all about my mocumplane au that tears Bing-ge a new one, will y'all still love me? No? Okay, great
Ok, so I've been going through some svsss stuff and I've got an idea for an AU that wouldn't leave me alone, if you want it take it, I need it GONE.
BUT svsss au, where shen yuan and xiang fei transmigrate both into npc disciples in cang qiong, and they are on one of the unnamed peaks, and because I'm a nerd for music cultivation, it's essentially music peak, through I'm playing with the idea, that they cultivate throught all possible arts (because once an art/designer student always an art/designer student), so while yes, they do learn how to use qi thru playing on instruments, they also have to learn how to create them, and this lovely peak is full of creative gremlins, so they learn how to bassicaly design their own instrument, just so it fits THEM, because everyone who I know, including myself, in the creative people sphere, custumises to a certain point their stuff, not all, but some. So they learn to do this, in case someone decides to fuck around and use a bad wood, or something, idk, but you get my point.
They also make paintings, but instead of what qing jing does, where it's apart of the four art they need to know, this peak makes paintings and disguisses talismans within them (some are sold for rich people for demon detection, and such), those works can also work as places where to store ecsessive spiritual (maybe even demonic) energy, and can be created with qi, you just have to learn how to guide it.
Of course they also write poems and books and theathre plays, but I wanna move on from this whole thing, so I'm stopping here and getting to the somewhat storyline.
SY and XF transmigrate early, and become disciples of this exact peak, they unfortunately do have systems who don't let them interact with the main PIDW cast much. However, they learn everything they can and because they didn't change the plot much, the burning of the sect still happens and everything pretty much goes according to PIDW cannon.
Shen Yuan learns/relearns how to play some instrument with strings (I do enjoy a violin player sy, but honestly anything goes) and xf i think would somehow weaponize literature, but idk how. Perhaps ragebaiting? Could he create a whole newtwork of spies using badly written porn? I say yes he could, also any porn book written by the peak can help with lower aphrodisiacs, if you enjoy the book in any sense (shen yuan hates this, because it doesn't make much sense, HOW does book cure a mouthfull of sex pollen??!!). The books/texts are created from some mild sex plants, than when you fill it with qi, can react to readers emotions and dumb a persons nerves/senses into thinking that the pollen has been curred, so it just passes as mild discomfort. Only some milder pollens and poisons can be curred that way, anything higher then "Ineedtobefucked" pollen/poison and you need to go to profesionals, sorry. But perhaps if SOMEBODY didn't burn it down, they could figure out that too.
Anyway SY kind of uses strings as his personal weapon choice, because martial training, and sword training is still important, if you want to be cultivator, and I feel like XF would be a talisman sort of guy, bonus point if he could use his voice (he is his first time around a writer, and what is writers job? Storytelling, to tell a story you need to captivate people, so it needs to be attention catching, so yes, voice manipulation like some weird siren or such) to manipulate, help with cultivation, sort of like charmspeak for aphrodite kids in pjo.
MOVING ON
Cumplane decides to say fuck any kind of plot, let's avoid it as much as we can. They decide to open up a small tavern that host any and all travelling musicians, actors, dancers and all forms of artists. When there are none travellers going around, it's eather sy or xf performing on the stage, because its still a tavern and people go there to drink (perhaps they train their staff to perform as well, so they can get a break). Anyway skip into the future and some time after realm merging they meet Mobei-jun, whose own spies sent him there, because that place is full of high spiritual energy, when it shouldn't be. Somehow cumplane, who sometime before got married so they could start their bussiness, withound annoying questions, gets draggend into working with/for Mobei-jun, and later on, they, after some lovely explaining and conversations and such, become friends with him! Yay, maybe the protagonist won't smite them, if he learns of their existence.
Mobei thinks he's courting them human style.
Successfully.
Cumplane are oblivious. So what if they also handle some trade routes for north, and stop assassinations on Mobei-jun, and handle the logistics and strategy planning like veterans. They are men of modern world, one of them lived in poverty, other run a family company, they have a successful bussines in this life, they are doing fiiine.
It's just to help out their good pal.
The North is under the impression, that they have two queens, who run the place, so their king is being bussy with the leftover emperor duties (look me in the eyes and tell me that PIDW binghe would be a good ruler, hes bussy being a warlord and not doing any logistics or handling everything else that's not fighting beasts, getting wifes, and taking the first oportunity to be out of the palace, sometime reminding the rest of the demon council/lords, whos the emperor and why).
Anyway jump to meeting the empeor of three realms, half heavenly demon, Luo Binghe.
Lbg is post Bingge vs Bingmei extra, and is kind of fractic trying to find his kind shizun. He shows up in the middle of the northern court, with it's all three rulers (two of them think of themselves as some kind of advisors) and drags Mobei away, to do his job, while he's away and sometimes back to divorce some of his wifes.
Mobei-jun decides to bring his future wifes with him, so they can contutinue what they were doing, so cut to cumplane meeting some of the main wifes, getting to teach some kids, unexpected friendships with LMA, NYY and SHL (they bond over books, ragebaiting your partner, veils, being the one handling everything and being underestimated all the time).
If Lbg asked, no, these are Mobeis partners, they are married to each other and are allowing Mobei to be THEIR third, no, not interested in women and they are very very weak.
Like yes, we radiate spiritual energy, because we were trained cultivators, these days we run a tavern, and ocassionaly help manage the northern kingdom. Never mind that one of them decapitated a would be assassins with piece of wire. No Jungshan, this one did not just manipulate a poison into a mans glass, with his voice, what are you talking about.
It's a clown show.
I don't know how it's going to end, but what I know is that mocumplane IS happening. Don't know if bingge should be allowed to join or left to suffer, perhaps implode because of xin mo, decisions, decisions...