omg i love the “lessons we never had to teach” w steve, i just read actually, and your writing is so good!! could you do a part two of that one where lily has actually a good bf, but steve takes time to trust/like him and gradually starts to trust him? also always giving her the pep talks. (and you are PORTUGUESE? ILY)
Dad’s watching - Steve Harrington
summary: After Lily’s heartbreak, Steve struggles to trust again, until a new boy proves, little by little, that he might be worthy of her heart. (this is a part 2 for one of my stories)
warnings: Overprotective dad, past heartbreak mentions, soft family feelings
wc: 2.5k
author's note: thank you sooo much for the love and the request I love writing them and yess I’m portuguese borned and raised ilyyyy
pt 1 | main masterlist | stranger things masterlist
The first punch happens so fast that later, Ethan will barely remember deciding to throw it.
What he remembers is the look on Lily’s face.
She’s standing by her locker, backpack slipping off one shoulder, eyes glossy but determined in that way that makes your chest ache when you love her. The boy is talking too loud. Laughing like what he did wasn’t cruel. Like it wasn’t real.
“She’s being dramatic,” he says to someone else, not even to her.
That’s when Ethan sees red.
He doesn’t yell. Doesn’t warn him. He just steps forward and swings.
The crack of knuckles against skin echoes down the hallway, sharp and final. The boy stumbles back, hand flying to his face, shock written all over him.
Ethan is shaking, breath heaving, eyes dark.
“You don’t get to talk about her,” he snaps. “Ever.”
Teachers come running. Someone shouts his name. Lily gasps, hands flying to her mouth.
Ethan doesn’t care.
Later, sitting in the principal’s office, knuckles bruised and split, he doesn’t apologize.
Not once.
And when Steve picks them up jaw tight, eyes scanning Lily for damage first, always first, Ethan expects to be yelled at.
Instead, Steve just puts a hand on his shoulder.
“You okay?” he asks quietly.
Ethan nods.
Steve exhales. “Alright.”
That’s all.
Weeks pass.
Healing happens quietly in your house. Not forced. Not rushed.
Lily grows lighter again, slowly. Not glowing. Not floating. Just… steadier. She laughs more at dinner. Sings softly while doing dishes. Sits closer to you on the couch, like she’s reminding herself she’s still safe.
One evening, you’re all in the living room.
Steve’s stretched out on one end of the couch, remote in hand, half-watching some old movie he’s seen a hundred times. Lily’s curled up on the other end, feet tucked under her, scrolling on her phone but glancing up at the screen every so often. In the kitchen, Ethan and you got music playing low while the smell of cookies fills the house, cause what boy doesn’t love his mamma time.
Steve glances at Lily, casual. “You want another blanket?”
She shakes her head. “I’m good.”
A beat passes.
Then she clears her throat.
“So… um. I’ve been talking to someone.”
Steve doesn’t move.
Doesn’t stiffen. Doesn’t react.
Inside, his brain absolutely short-circuits.
Another boy. Another heart. Another chance for someone to hurt her.
But he keeps his voice even. “Yeah?”
She nods, eyes still on the TV. “It’s nothing serious. Just… talking. He seems nice.”
Steve swallows.
“That’s good,” he says carefully. “You wanna tell me about him?”
She looks at him then, surprised. “Really?”
“Yeah, kid,” he says. “I’d rather hear it from you.”
Something shifts in her expression relief, maybe. Trust.
“We’re just friends,” she says quickly. “Like, actually. I promise.”
Steve nods. “Okay. Just… keep me updated, yeah?”
She smiles, small but genuine. “I will.”
From the kitchen, Ethan calls out, “Cookies in five!”
“Ethan!! Shhhh they’re gonna eat all our hard work” you joke, which leaves Steve and Lily with a smile in their faces.
Steve exhales slowly, tension he didn’t realize he was holding easing just a fraction.
He sees the boy for the first time a few days later.
Steve’s by the window, arms crossed, pretending to check the weather while absolutely not doing that at all.
A car pulls up. Nothing flashy. Clean. Normal.
The boy gets out, opens the door for Lily.
Steve watches closely.
The kid doesn’t rush. Doesn’t lean in too close. Doesn’t touch her unless she moves first.
“Is that him?” Steve asks.
Lily glances over. “Yeah. But—Dad—it’s really not a big deal.”
Steve nods. “Alright.”
She heads inside, calling a quick goodbye over her shoulder. The boy waves. Steve gives a single nod in return.
Measured. Neutral.
When Lily disappears down the hall, Steve finally exhales.
Outside, you’re in the backyard with Ethan, half-heartedly “helping” him clean the pool while he insists you’re making it harder.
“Mom,” he laughs, nudging you gently. “I got it.”
“I’m helping,” you insist, even as you absolutely are not.
Steve steps outside, rubbing the back of his neck.
You look up at him instantly. “You saw him.”
He nods. “Yeah.”
“And?”
“He seemed… fine,” Steve admits. “Which somehow makes it worse.”
Ethan snorts. “You’re impossible.”
Steve ignores him, turning to you instead. “What am I supposed to do?”
You pause, setting the skimmer aside. “What do you mean?”
“Am I doing the right thing?” he asks quietly. “By not freaking out. By letting it happen.”
You step closer, lowering your voice. “Steve. If she knows she can come to us if she knows we’re not gonna scare her into hiding things that’s how we protect her.”
He looks at you, eyes searching.
“She’s gonna meet people,” you continue softly. “And if we’re by her side through it, that’s better than her feeling like she’s alone.”
He exhales, shaking his head. “You’re always right, baby. It’s annoying.”
You smile and kiss him, slow and familiar.
“Guys,” Ethan deadpans. “I’m literally right here.”
Steve laughs, pulling back. “Yeah, yeah.”
You squeeze Ethan’s arm. “You did good with the pool.”
He grins. “Told you.”
Steve looks toward the house, where Lily’s laughter drifts through an open window.
Careful. Calm. Still here.
And maybe, for the first time Steve realizes that letting go doesn’t mean stepping away.
It just means trusting the lessons they never had to teach.
Time doesn’t announce itself when it starts to heal things.
It just… shows up in pieces.
It’s Liam, the new boy, pulling up outside the house on a random Tuesday afternoon, engine still running while Lily grabs her bag. Steve watches from the window, arms crossed out of habit more than suspicion now.
The boy gets out of the car anyway.
Walks her to the door.
“Evening, Mr. Harrington,” Liam says easily, like he’s done it a hundred times. “Hi, Mrs. Harrington.”
You smile back. “Hi, Liam.”
Steve nods. “Hey.”
Not stiff. Not sharp. Just… there.
When Lily comes home later, hair smelling like outside air and cheap movie theater popcorn, she’s lighter. Not floating. Just content.
“He walked me to my locker again,” she tells you while you’re washing dishes. “Said it’s dumb to rush.”
You hum. “Sounds like he’s got common sense.”
She smiles to herself.
Another afternoon, it’s colder than expected. Lily comes inside wrapped in a hoodie that’s very clearly not hers sleeves too long, hem brushing her thighs.
Steve notices immediately.
“Where’d that come from?” he asks.
She shrugs. “Liam’s. He said I looked cold.”
Steve pauses.
Then: “Smart kid.”
You pretend not to see the way that answer surprises even him.
The little things stack up quietly.
Liam brings cookies once. Homemade. Slightly burnt on the edges. He apologizes too much about them. Steve eats three.
Liam shows up early one Saturday just to say hi before taking Lily to the movies. Shakes Steve’s hand. Makes eye contact. Doesn’t rush Lily when she’s running late.
Ethan likes him.
That might be the biggest shock of all.
“He’s chill,” Ethan says one night, mouth full of cereal. “We talked about music for like an hour.”
Steve raises an eyebrow. “Yeah?”
“He listens,” Ethan adds. “That’s rare.”
Steve files that away.
Weeks pass like that. No big moments. No dramatic declarations. Just consistency.
Lily keeps you updated without being asked.
“We haven’t kissed,” she says one evening, almost shy. “He said there’s no rush.”
You glance at her, studying her face. “How do you feel about that?”
She shrugs, then smiles. “Safe.”
That word sits heavy in your chest in the best way.
Steve overhears bits and pieces. Pretends not to. Pretends he’s not listening when she tells you about Liam buying her sour candy because “he remembered she liked the blue ones best.”
But one night, while folding laundry together, Steve finally says it.
“He’s… alright,” he admits.
You smile into a t-shirt. “High praise.”
The fireplace is lit in the backyard when the air turns crisp enough to justify it.
You and Lily sit close, legs tucked under blankets, marshmallows melting just a little too fast. On the other side of the yard, Steve and Ethan are locked into a game, voices rising and falling with every near-miss.
Lily watches the fire for a long moment before she speaks.
“I didn’t want to fall for him,” she says quietly.
You don’t interrupt.
“I really didn’t,” she continues. “After what happened… I told myself I wouldn’t.”
You reach for her hand.
“But I think I am,” she admits. “And that scares me.”
You squeeze her fingers gently. “That makes sense.”
She exhales. “I’m not saying he’s ‘the one’ or anything. I just… think he might be a good one.”
You smile softly. “I’ve met the kid. I agree.”
She laughs quietly. “You hated my last boyfriend.”
“I hated how he treated you,” you correct. “Big difference.”
She nods, thoughtful. “Do you think Dad’s okay with it?”
You glance over at Steve, who’s currently yelling at the TV while Ethan laughs at him.
“I think your dad is trying very hard to be okay with it,” you say honestly. “Which is his version of trust.”
She smiles at that.
“And between you and me,” you add, lowering your voice, “He tried to get some information about your brothers love life out of me, so don’t think it’s just with you.”
Lily snorts. “No way.”
“Oh yes way,” you grin. “Your father is nothing if not consistent.”
She relaxes then, leaning into your shoulder.
“I just… wanted you to know,” she says quietly.
“I’m glad you told me,” you reply. “And I trust you. Whatever you decide.”
She nods, eyes shining a little in the firelight.
Across the yard, Steve glances over at you both. Catches Lily laughing. Sees her relaxed. Happy.
Something in his chest eases.
He doesn’t say it out loud.
But he’s learning.
Liam arrives ten minutes early.
Not late. Not exactly on time. Early enough that it feels intentional.
Steve notices immediately.
“He said six,” Steve mutters, glancing at the clock for the third time in as many minutes.
You look up from where you’re wiping down the counter. “It’s five fifty.”
“That’s early.”
“It’s polite.”
Steve hums, unconvinced.
The doorbell rings before he can spiral any further.
Steve stands so fast his chair scrapes loudly against the floor. Ethan, already suspiciously hovering near the hallway, freezes mid-step.
“I got it,” Steve says.
“I’ll come with you,” you add casually, already following.
Liam stands on the porch with his hands clasped in front of him, dressed nicer than usual. Button-down shirt. Clean shoes. Hair carefully styled but not stiff. He looks… nervous. Not guilty-nervous. Respectful-nervous.
“Mr. Harrington. Mrs. Harrington,” he says. “Hi.”
“Hi, Liam,” you smile warmly.
Steve nods. “You’re early.”
“Yes, sir,” Liam says quickly. “I—uh—if that’s okay. I actually… wanted to talk to you both for a second. If that’s alright.”
Steve’s stomach drops.
“Talk?” he repeats.
Liam swallows. “Yes, sir.”
Ethan, from the hallway, makes a strangled noise and immediately pretends he’s deeply invested in a family photo on the wall.
Steve steps aside. “Come in.”
Liam does, shoulders squared like he’s bracing for impact.
They move to the living room. Lily’s door is still closed upstairs music faintly playing. She has no idea.
Liam clears his throat.
“I just wanted to say,” he begins, voice steady despite the obvious nerves, “that I really care about Lily. And I’ve tried to show that in the ways I know how. I’ve never wanted to rush her or pressure her into anything. I just…” He glances between you and Steve. “I’d really like to ask her to be my girlfriend. Officially. And I wanted to ask you first.”
Steve’s brain short-circuits.
Ask her— girlfriend— official—
He opens his mouth, closes it, rubs a hand over his face.
“You want to—” Steve exhales. “You want to ask my daughter to be your girlfriend.”
“Yes, sir.”
Steve looks at you.
You give him a calm look that says: breathe.
Liam rushes on. “I know it’s not… like, a formal thing. But I respect you both, and I respect her. And I wanted you to know my intentions aren’t—” He shakes his head. “They’re not bad. I promise.”
Steve studies him.
Not just looking really looking.
This isn’t a kid trying to sneak something. This is a boy standing still under scrutiny, choosing honesty anyway.
Steve nods slowly.
“I appreciate you coming to us,” he says. “That took guts.”
Liam lets out a breath he’s clearly been holding.
“And,” Liam adds, almost sheepish, “Ethan already gave me his permission.”
Silence.
“…Ethan,” Steve repeats.
There’s a loud thump from the hallway.
Steve turns just in time to see Ethan half-hidden behind the corner, frozen mid-escape.
“You,” Steve says flatly.
Ethan winces. “In my defense—”
“Since when do you give permission about your sister’s life?”
Ethan shrugs. “Since I like him and he treats her right.”
Steve stares at his son for a long moment.
Then back at Liam.
Steve lifts his hands. “Alright.”
Liam straightens.
Steve points a finger. “Here’s how this works. You hurt her, even emotionally, I will know.”
Liam nods immediately. “Yes, sir.”
Steve continues. “I won’t yell. I won’t threaten. I will simply make your life very uncomfortable.”
You snort.
“And don’t listen to him,” you add sweetly, resting a hand on Steve’s arm. “But I will absolutely slap the shit out of you if you hurt my baby.”
Liam’s eyes widen but he smiles, relieved.
“I wouldn’t,” he says earnestly. “I promise.”
Steve nods once. “Okay.”
That’s it.
That’s the approval.
Just then, Lily comes down the stairs.
She’s wearing a soft dress, hair curled just right, smile easy and bright and she freezes when she sees everyone standing there.
“Why does this feel like an ambush?” she asks.
Liam turns to her, suddenly all nerves again. “Hi.”
She smiles. “Hi.”
Steve clears his throat. “You’re heading out?”
“Yes…?” Lily answers slowly.
Liam takes a breath. “I was hoping I could ask you something. Tonight.”
Her eyes flicker to you, questioning.
You smile. “Go.”
They leave not long after, Lily glowing in a way that feels different this time steadier.
When she comes home later, she doesn’t sneak in.
She walks straight into the kitchen where you and Steve are waiting.
“We’re dating,” she announces, smiling.
Steve stands, opens his arms. “Congratulations.”
She hugs him tight.
Then you.
“But,” Steve adds gently, pulling back to look at her, “remember what we talked about.”
She nods. “I know.”
“Trust yourself,” you add. “And us.”
She smiles. “I will.”
She turns to head upstairs.
“Lily,” Steve calls.
She stops. “Yeah?”
“I think it’s time we finally have… the conversation.”
Her face drops. “Conversation?”
“You know,” Steve says seriously. “About how babies come into the world.”
“No,” she says immediately. “Dad, please, no.”
You laugh as she bolts up the stairs, calling, “Absolutely not!”
The door slams.
Steve sighs.
“Give her time,” you say, slipping into his arms. “She’s not ready.”
He looks down at you slowly. “Are you ready?”
Before you can answer, he’s kissing you, playful and familiar, climbing into your space.
You laugh, hands on his shoulders. “Stevie, I’m pretty sure I already know how babies are made.”
And I'm petrified of being alone, now | Masterlist
Summary: She’s just trying to get by, really. What with being a single parent to her four year old son whilst simultaneously trying to kick start a successful career as a radio presenter. She’s got everything she’s ever wanted though, friends close by, a mum who’s merely a phone call away, and of course her baby boy. What else is there to wish for? But then, it’s not long before her relatively normal life gets upended and turned on its head, and she’s suddenly forced to deal with situations she’s never even thought to imagine.
What happens when one mention of a certain controversial singer on her show sends a flood of unexpected challenges her way?
Request: hi! I was wondering whether you could do something with Harry as a dad? Something just really cute? Thank you!
Dad!harry x fem!reader
Trigger warnings: none
“Evelyn baby!” Your voice rang out as you crouched down to welcome your daughter into your arms, you had the duty of picking Evelyn up because Harry had to do a photoshoot but you didn’t mind at all. Harry was your husband of four years and you absolutely adored him. You loved him because he was himself, not just for his looks… for his personality, his kindness, his love, his vulnerability but especially for the love he had for your daughter. The moment she was born they were attached at the hip practically, he was always holding her, most of the time after you had gotten out of the hospital he held Evelyn in his arms saying his only priority was for you to get rest and that he would look after her and he did. Harry was very big on “skin to skin” contact and so often when Evelyn was a newborn held the small girl on his bare chest just so she could feel safe and at home with him. His interactions with her were simply the biggest reason why you absolutely adored him. “Mama!” Her small voice said excitedly as she wrapped her arms around you gripping onto you tightly, she was 5 years old and had finally settled in to her pre-school that she struggled in because she was shy and struggled with making friends but soon realised her peers there simply wanted to be her friend.
“Did you have a good day?” You asked smiling down at her, her head nodding furiously “Uhuh! We made Easter hats!” She exclaimed excitedly with a grin and you smiled pressing a kiss to her forehead “that’s great sweetheart,” you said happily before lifting her up into your arms carrying her back to your car “daddy?” She soon asked and you smiled “daddy’s having a photoshoot. But we’re gonna go see him okay?” You said smiling at her her smile growing at your words “cheese! Daddy’s saying cheese?” She asked and you chuckled gently, you and Harry had taught her that when you got your pictures taken you had to say cheese and it simply stuck with Evelyn and she couldn’t quite pronounce photo or photoshoot so whenever she wanted a picture taken of her or if she wanted to take a picture of you and Harry she often just yelled ‘cheese’ even in the most strangest of places which got a lot of strange stares but in reality it was just adorable.
You put Evelyn in her booster seat as you made sure she was strapped in before you strapped the seatbelt around her, kissing her cheek “wanna see daddy!” She shouted and you gently shushed her “inside voice please honey, we’re going to see him now.” You assured before closing the door quietly, the toddler starting to play with her sensory toys which often helped to keep her quiet and distract her on long car journeys but she sometimes also played with them when bored or nervous. You got into the car as you immediately began driving to the studio where Harry was having his photoshoot. He not only needed some new album covers but he also had other things coming up too so wanted some good photos to use, plus his Instagram profile picture was looking a tad bit boring and he wanted to brighten it up more.
Soon enough you arrived at the studio and you quickly got Evelyn out of the car as you slowly made your way into the studio, you heard Harry’s voice instantly and so did Evelyn a soft squeal leaving her lips as she kicked her legs slightly to be put down “okay careful baby” you said before setting her down onto the floor as you followed after her. Harry’s outfit was beautiful, he literally looked like a god. Jesus Christ were you obsessed with how he looked. He looked so pretty. As his eyes landed on you he smiled at you Evelyn’s screams of excitement being heard as Harry smirked softly “oh I wonder who that is… can anyone else hear that?” He asked the photographer continuing to take pictures of him as he had asked prior to you arriving, he wanted the camera to picture him as himself. “Daddy! Daddy!” Evelyn shouted excitedly her small hands gripping at his jeans lightly tugging at the material and he looked down, gasping as if he hadn’t seen her “oh my goodness… is this my princess? Princess Evelyn!” He lifted her up into his arms her giggles getting louder as she smiled at him her small hand resting on his cheek and in that moment you couldn’t help yourself as you took a quick picture of the two, your heart instantly melting “I missed you dada” she said her hand remaining on Harry’s cheek and he smiled pressing a kiss to her forehead “i missed you too honey…” he held her close before turning himself and her towards the camera “say cheese baby” he said and so she did, “cheeseeee!” She exclaimed the flash from the camera lighting both Harry and Evelyn’s eyes up and you watched the interaction your heart continuing to melt as you beamed happily. You then looked down to your phone as you immediately put a picture of the two up on your Instagram, both Harry and your daughter were your biggest inspiration and most important thing in your life so your Instagram was full of pictures of them, you had grown quite the following too but that didn’t matter to you. All that mattered to you was Harry and Evelyn.
Evelyn soon began running around the studio, being chased by Harry as you watched a soft smile on your lips and once Harry had made a full circle round he appeared beside you again his arms wrapping around your waist “mm.. hello.” He spoke pressing a kiss to your cheek and you smiled running your fingers through his hair gently “hi… I think she missed you more than I did.” You teased and he glared at you playfully “I’m kidding.. I missed you tons.” You said holding onto him tightly, Evelyn constantly tapping Harry’s leg but he didn’t mind his attention soon turning to her “yes miss Evelyn?” He asked and that set the girl off in fits of giggles “chase me daddy!” She giggled out again and Harry glanced at you begging you to help and you laughed out “guess this’ll help me get my stamina back before tour” he chuckled out before chasing Evelyn around, purposely going slowly so she could win her squeals being music to both your and Harry’s ears. You knew Evelyn would miss Harry when he went away on tour and so that’s why you and him were trying to figure out a plan to be able to bring Evelyn along on tour with him, maybe you too.
“Mama!” The small child exclaimed “save me!!” She yelled and you laughed out as she hid behind your legs “I’ve got you… but who knows… maybe I’m on daddy’s side!” You yelled dramatically, the room being chaotic but fun as you lifted her up into your arms spinning her around as she screamed out happily before you held her back to your chest Harry slowly walking towards her like a predator awaiting to pounce on its prey and you laughed out as she kicked her legs “daddy no!!” She yelled but before she could do anything he had began to tickle her relentlessly, before lifting her T-shirt up as he began blowing raspberries into her tummy purposely making a farting noise as she squealed, laughing louder, Harry soon stopping just so he could wrap his arms around you gripping onto you tightly as Evelyn wrapped her arms around his neck, being smushed in between the two of you as Harry looked into your eyes lovingly “love you both so so much… my two favourite girls in the whole entire world. My loves.” He said softly before pressing a kiss to your forehead and a kiss to Evelyn’s forehead his words nothing but the truth as he smiled, a photo being taken of the three of you cuddled together and Harry used that specific photo of him and his girls together as his new Instagram photo. The world knew him and his Instagram… but he wanted the world to know that his world was his two girls… y/n and Evelyn.
One of the scariest places you’ve ever stepped foot into. The same one your willingly going back to after four years.
You had just started your masters degree when you found out you were pregnant. It was going to be way to labour intensive to see it through with a baby, so you did exactly what you didn’t want to and dropped out.
Seven months after you dropped out you gave birth to the most precious little boy and called him Noah. Now little three year old Noah was heading off to day care for the first time while his Mum was heading back to start her Masters all over again.
Dropping Noah off you couldn’t decide if you should feel like a bad Mum going back to University or proud of yourself for being able to do both. You make sure Noah is occupied with some colouring before heading off to your first class. This process occurred for the first few weeks and began working really well for you and Noah. He was learning so much at day care and you were feeling amazing about your Masters.
There was still one thing holding you back in one of your classes. You had had some run ins with one of your professors who you knew from before you had Noah and who you had gone to University with as undergraduates. Harry. You were good friends, for a while, but things broke down when Noah’s Dad fell into the picture. Harry hated him, always said he was wrong for you and up to no good. Which in a way he was right.
******
You were sitting in Harry’s class one day when your phone began to buzz with the daycares number. You quickly sneak out of Harry’s lecture and answer. Your day was being cut short. Poor Noah was vomiting with a temperature, meaning you had no choice but to go and pick him up. You sneak back into class packing your things up quietly before sneaking back out glancing down to the front of the room on the way out to notice Harry already staring at you a wave of confusion covering his face.
You pick Noah up and head straight home. Once arriving at home you get some medicine ready for Noah who you had left laying on the couch. “Baby mummy has some medicine to help you feel better” you say softly kneeling in front of him “mummy feel yucky” he whimpers. You lean over kissing his head softly “I know baby, take this for mummy it will help I promise”. You help him pop the little syringe of liquid in his mouth before passing him his little water bottle to wash it down “mummy’s brave boy” you smile brushing his growing hair from his face “have a little lay down monkey, mummy’s going to sit with you ok?” You ask softly. He just nods pulling his blanket and teddy up closer to his chest.
After around half an hour Noah had fallen asleep. You decide to take this opportunity to try and catch up on the things you missed in class today which meant emailing your professor for the notes. You open your laptop going to your emails to see a couple of unread ones including one from Harry from that afternoon.
To your surprise he had taken the time from his day to email you the notes from class today with a message attached.
‘Hi Y/N,
I noticed you slipped out of class today, I just wanted to check in and ensure everything is ok?
No need to go into detail, but please don’t hesitate to reach out if you need anything.
Please find attached the rest of the notes from the lecture today, feel free to contact me with questions or queries,
Kind regards,
Prof. H Styles.’
You quickly glance through the notes before looking at the time seeing it was still only early, Harry would still be at work, you figured it was best to offer some sort of explanation.
‘Hi Professor,
Thank you for reaching out and for the notes they have been very helpful.
I’m sorry I had to sneak out, unfortunately my son fell sick and I had to bring him home,
I’m hoping to be back in class tomorrow.
Thanks again,
Y/N Y/L/N.’
You never got a reply from Harry after that. Not that you expected one. You got through the rest of your day hanging out on the couch with Noah in between his vomits and temperatures, you managed to get the lecture notes revised and yourself up to date with your classes, as well as Noah fed and tucked into bed a little earlier than normal to get the extra rest he needed.
****
The next morning Noah had stopped vomiting but was still having temperatures on and off. You had called your Mum the night before to see if she could look after Noah so you could to go to your classes. She was more than accomodating coming over to your place extra early and assuring you that there was no need to rush home that he would be ok with his Grandma for a day.
You head off to your classes for the day and try to get as much done as you can to be able to give Noah your undivided attention once you arrived home. Your last class for the day was with Harry. Things went well. You had a great grasp on what was going on in his class at the moment. Once the class was over everyone started to file out, you were packing your bag getting ready to go yourself when Harry called you out “Y/N?” you turn your head in his direction “is everything ok?” He asks “I just wanted to check in” he explains.
You continue to pack your things as Harry makes his way toward you. “Yeah everything’s fine, Noah’s feeling a little better” you smile softly glancing at him. “Ok, well let me know if you need anything” he nods toward you before walking back down to the front of the classroom.
“Professor” you say softly to catch Harry’s attention as he was walking away. He looks up glaring a little “Y/N we’ve known each other for a long time, you don’t have to call me that” he snaps a little. Nodding, you glance at your feet “sorry” you whisper “I uh, just wanted to say thank you, for checking in” you look up a little at his now softened expression before walking away.
******
A few weeks had passed since Noah had been sick, he had made a full recovery and was as energetic as ever. You had planned with Noah’s dad for Noah to spend a few days with him over the weekend. You were planning on dropping Noah off at your Mums for his Dad, Ryan to come and pick him up. You’d had a rough separation from Ryan, he was incredibly possessive and manipulative, he caused you so much stress during your pregnancy that Noah was almost 10 weeks premature.
You dropped Noah off on Thursday morning to your Mums for Ryan to pick him up that afternoon after he finished work. You were heading towards your first deadline for an assignment in Harry’s class meaning it was good timing to be able to have the extra time to study. You were in the library studying a little after five PM when your phone began to ring, Ryan’s contact shining on your screen. You sigh a little before standing up to make your way outside to take the call.
“Hello” you chine putting on your best ‘nice voice’ on.
“Hey, are you busy?” Ryan asks not bothering to ask how you were or if it was a good time to talk.
“I’m studying, so a little, why?” You ask not liking where the conversation was going.
“I have bad news” he sighs dramatically causing you to roll your eyes “I can’t have Noah this weekend, something came up I have to cancel sorry”. You audibly groan pinching the bridge of your nose.
“Are you shitting me right now? You’ve been asking for this for months and when I say yes you cancel, what do I tell Noah?” You snap becoming frustrated at how unreliable this man was.
“I don’t know, tell him I’m sick or something it’s not my problem” he grumbles.
“He’s your son Ryan! You can’t just pop in and out as you please, you either need to be part of his life or give it up” you yell causing people to look your direction.
“Whatever, if your going to be a bitch then I’m not talking to you” he says bluntly.
“Ryan I’m done with this crap. Your not going to see Noah anymore, you can’t just jump in and out of his life it’s not fair on him” you explain.
Before you knew it the line went dead, indicating Ryan had hung up. You groan loudly gripping your phone tightly you look around to see a number of people looking between you and what they were doing, including Harry who was now making his way towards you.
You sigh a little beginning to pack up your belongings trying to slip away from talking to Harry. To your dismay Harry’s long strides caught up to you “Y/N” Harry says softly reaching the desk you were working from. “Why don’t you come to my office?” He asks reluctantly. You sigh shaking your head “no it’s ok I should get home and finish this”.
Harry didn’t move away from you, instead coming to sit next to you “Y/N, please?” Harry asks softly. You look up at him seeing his soft expression “at least just talk to me a little, I heard you…on the phone, is everything ok?” He asks you sigh sitting back into the chair allowing Harry to lean against the desk.
“Do you need an extension for this paper? I’m more than happy to try and make things a little more flexible for you?” Harry asks, clearly sympathising with you. You quickly shake your head “no no no, it’s Ryan he’s being an idiot, nothing to do with class work, just him being him” you sigh.
“Oh you’re still together, I understand” Harry says softly seeming disappointed. You begin shaking your head laughing “no we are not…. We started having problems while I was pregnant with Noah, he left the day I went into labour I called him while he was at work to tell him I needed to go to the hospital and he just never showed. Noah and I came home three weeks later and all of his stuff was gone. It took almost a year for him to decide he deserved to be a part of Noah’s life and I honestly hate it. He cancels last minute almost every visit and he pushes me for visits. I’m just exhausted by it Harry….” You sigh placing your chin in your hands “I’m sorry I offloaded all that onto you” you say shaking your head pushing your hair from your face.
Harry just stares at you for a minute “I’m glad” he says softly “I’m glad your not with him, I know I used to give you a hard time about it but you really do deserve better. I’m sorry I wasn’t a better friend back then” Harry adds looking at his hands.
You shake your head “don’t be silly, you were a great friend, I was naive and just happened to end up pregnant” you start before pausing for a moment “But I wouldn’t change Noah for the world he’s the sweetest kid and even though he doesn’t understand why I’m gone a lot at the moment he hasn’t complained once”
Harry simply smiles in your direction “he sounds like his Mum” he chuckles a little. You smile glancing at Harry. “Would you like to come to my office? The library will be closing soon, I’ll be here for a little while yet, I can make us some tea?” Harry offers.
You think on his offer for a moment before nodding “that sounds great, thank you” you smile softly beginning to gather your things.
Walking to Harry’s office the campus had become relatively empty in the last half hour. Footpaths that we’re lined with groups of students were now empty and several buildings were now locked for the night.
You make it to Harry’s office he unlocks the door and lets you in before him “make yourself comfortable I’ll just be marking some papers” he smiles. You nod a little and find a seat in his surprisingly large office, getting to work.
*****
The pair work in silence for a couple of hours before you notice the time “crap” you mumble quickly trying to pack your things up again “everything ok?” Harry asks, you nod “yeah, just need to go and pick Noah up, his bedtime is 8, I didn’t realise it was already 7:30.” You sigh.
Harry stands to come and help you collecting some papers into a pile for you “You should have this, I’ll be giving them out in class tomorrow but have yours now” he says softly “but you didn’t get it from me” he smirks placing one of your freshly marked assessments under a pile of your papers “grading is on the last page, you’re doing great Y/N” Harry adds causing you to smile “thank you Harry and thank you for this, it was really helpful” you smile softly swinging your bag onto your shoulder “see you tomorrow” you say softly before slipping out of the room.
Your drive to pick Noah up was brief, you called your Mum to let her know what you were on your way, not that she was worried. She was however pissed that Noah’s father hadn’t arrived to collect him, arguably angrier than you were.
You arrive and let yourself in seeing Noah almost asleep on the couch, he sees you and smiles widely, sliding off the couch “Mummy!” He yells running towards you “Hi baby!” You smile kneeling down as he runs into your arms, you hug him tightly kissing his head “Did you have a good day with Grandma?” You ask picking him up carrying him to the kitchen where your Mum was cleaning up “Grandma let me have chicken nuggies for dinner Mummy!” he tells excitedly you giggle rubbing his back “you’re very spoilt buddy” your Mum looks towards you “he is very spoilt” she smiles.
“Thank you for looking after him Mum” you smile “I’m sorry” you pout a little. Noah snuggles into your chest wrapping his arms around you. “How was your day?” Your mum asks finishing up some dishes “it was ok, I spent the afternoon studying” you say softly rocking Noah a little “anything from….him?” Your mum asks you just shake your head.
“He called me to tell me, I lost it. I don’t want him to see us anymore” you sigh a little not going into detail in front of Noah. “I’m sorry sweetheart” your Mum says moving to hug your side to not disturb Noah. “Should get him home” she says softly you nod “I’ll grab his bag” you say before walking to the living room picking up Noah’s backpack you had out together for the weekend “thank you for looking after him mum I appreciate it so much” you smile, giving her a hug.
You make it out to the car and buckle a now sleeping Noah into his car seat. Heading home you manage to get Noah into his pyjamas and tucked into bed without waking him too much. You smile a little watching Noah for a while before heading off to your own room. You grab your papers from your bag wanting to look over your paper from Harry.
There we’re still some areas you wanted to improve on. You make it to the final page and see your mark, sliding in with a high distinction, better than you thought you were going to do. You smile a little proud of how you were going so far and being incredibly grateful for the support you had.
Looking a little further down at Harry’s comments you were a little taken back. Instead of leaving a detailed comment on your paper and areas to improve he had simply written;
‘Beautiful work, I’ve missed reading your papers and I’m glad you came back, text me, hopefully you still have my number - H’
You look at the time seeing it was almost 9pm. You pace your room for a moment before dropping the paper on your dresser grabbing your phone instead. You pace the room again looking at Harry’s contact for a good few minutes before finally opening a new text to him.
‘Thanks for the paper, and thank you for letting me study in your office today. I really appreciate all your help’
You send the message setting your phone down on the charger and getting yourself ready for bed knowing that Noah would probably be up early.
*****
You managed to wake up before Noah and drag yourself out of bed. You head out to the kitchen and go to put on some soft music when you notice that Harry had replied to your text last night at around midnight.
‘You’re very welcome, I’m sorry things have been rough for you, please let me know if I can do anything’
You giggle to yourself a little at how sweet Harry was being while also being professional.
You start putting breakfast together for you and Noah before heading upstairs to wake him. You sneak into his room and sit on the edge of his bed brushing through his hair a little. You smile noticing the little bit of curl it was starting to get you kiss his head softly “Noah” you whisper softly causing him to stir “it’s time to wake up sweet boy” he stirs more rolling over to face you “Mummy” he whimpers rubbing his eyes. “Hey buddy” you smile Noah reaches up to you wth his smalls hands.
You pick him up carrying him to the kitchen as he wakes up. “Did you sleep well bud?” You ask. He nods into your neck causing you to giggle “are you excited for day care?” You ask. Noah kicks his feet out a little bit showing how excited he was “yes!” You smile putting him down to go and find his seat. “Are you hungry?” You ask. Noah runs to his seat sitting up ready for breakfast “yes please Mummy” he says. “Ok let’s get organised then” you smile getting breakfast.
*****
Heading into uni for the day to drop Noah at day care you were running early which meant you had time to let Noah walk his way into the campus and look around a little more than usual.
On your way in Noah sees the big grass quad and runs off across it. You smile watching him, very little worry in your mind due to the very little number of people around. Noah goes to make his way back to you when he accidentally steps out in front of none other than Harry.
He instantly stops in his tracks looking up at Harry, he takes a few small steps back as you begin to make your way over to him “Noah” you call out. Harry looks up seeing you and smiles. You finally make your way to them picking him up “Hey buddy, you ok?” You ask. He looks at you just nodding. “Noah this is one of Mummy’s teachers, his name is Harry” Noah looks at you then at Harry “like my teachers Mummy?” Noah asks. You shrug “a little” you smile.
“Good morning” Harry says softly “Hi Noah, it’s nice to meet you” Harry adds holding his hand out for Noah little one to shake which Noah gladly takes. “You say hello to Harry” you whisper to Noah he nods say hello to Harry before squirming to get out of your arms.
You let him go but he stays relatively close to you and Harry. “He looks so much like you, where do the curls come from though?” Harry asks. You shrug a little “I had curly hair as a kid, he’ll probably grow out of it, they look cute though” you smile watching as Noah runs on the grass “Hey um, I was thinking we should catch up properly if it seems ok?” Harry asks “we could go for coffee? Noah could come I don’t mind” he says softly “it’s entirely up to you” you smile a little
“I would actually love that Harry thank you” you say as Noah comes back to you holding your “would the University be ok with it? I mean technically I am one of your students” you were a little anxious about the idea but not against it at all.
Harry shrugs “I think it’s more of a coincidence that your my student than an inconvenience, we were friends as undergraduates, I’m just catching up with a friend” he says matter of factly causing you to consider his idea of things as well but still seeing things from the university’s perspective. Eventually you give in and nod “why don’t we get coffee over the weekend?” You ask, almost surprising yourself with your bold request.
Harry glances at his feet and smiles “I would love that” he says softly pushing his glasses back up his nose. You hadn’t seen him wear them in so long, but they still made him look as sweet as he did 4 years ago. “Great, I’ll text you?” You ask to which Harry nods “I better get Noah to day care” you smile before calling out to him. He comes running over grabbing your leg with his small hands “Mummy I found a butterfly!” He shouts causing you and Harry to laugh. You pick him up resting him on your hip “that’s so cool sweetie! Should we go to day care and tell them all about it?” You ask Noah nods before looking at Harry.
You smile a little just watching them look at one another for a while “Noah, would you like to come with Mummy for a hot chocolate with Harry on the weekend?” You ask him softly only loud enough that Harry could hear as well. Noah claps his hands “yes please Mummy! Can we go to the park too?” He asks his little eyes gleaming.
“I’m sure my puppy would love to meet you Noah” Harry smiles Noah’s head flys in Harry’s direction. “What your puppy’s name?” Noah asks “his name is Ned, he’s only very little” Harry explains his full attention on your son. “I didn’t know you had a puppy” you say softly. Harry looks at you and nods “only had him a few weeks, sweetest thing, he’s a Lab, only 10 weeks old” he smiles.
“He’s sounds adorable Harry, I look forward to seeing him.” You grins “me too” he chuckles “anyway I’ll let you go, don’t want to be late, I’ll see you in class?” He asks you nod before Harry begins to head off squeezing your arm and waving at Noah as he does so.
*****
Saturday morning you were woken by the sound and movement of Noah crawling into bed next to you you roll over towards him opening your eyes a little “y’ok sweetheart?” You ask softly helping him the rest of the way in “Mummy cuddle” he whimpers you smile a little and open your arms for him to fall into.
You hold him close rubbing Noah’s back for a while before he begins to squirm “you ready to get up bud?” You ask “I’m hungry please Mummy” you giggle a little “alright come on let’s get some breakfast.”
You get Noah organised and sat down for his breakfast “Are you excited to see Harry today Noah?” You ask, Noah begins clapping his hands causing you to giggle “Mummy do I get to see the puppy?!” He asks excitedly “I hope so baby” you smile.
You sit with Noah to have some breakfast and text Harry while Noah works through the strawberries you added to his plate.
‘Noah’s so excited to see you and Ned today’
You send before setting your phone down. You get Noah’s dressed his hair done and teeth brushed before getting yourself organised pulling on some light wash jeans and a floral sweater. You head back to the kitchen to grab your phone seeing Harry had texted back.
‘I’m really looking forward to it, what time suits you?’
You smile a little, you were a little uneasy about this weird feeling you were having toward Harry, but it’s harmless he’s just a friend. Right?
‘Noah’s dressed and ready, should we meet at the coffee shop near the University? There’s a park across the road?’
You take your phone into the bathroom while you put just a little bit of makeup on.
‘Sounds great, see you in about half an hour?’
You smile a little at Harry’s message and head to Noah’s room to pack him a bag before reply
‘Perfect! See you soon’
You get Noah buckled into the car and head towards the University Noah keeps himself occupied in the back seat singing along with the music you had playing.
You park and head towards the cafe holding Noah’s hand on one side and his little bag on the other. You look up and see Harry waiting for you in black skinny jeans and a white t shirt under his sweater. This was the Harry you knew like the back of your hand. Beside him was Ned trying to chew his leash as Harry tried to stop him.
“Hey” you smile as you get closer “Hi” Harry smiles “Hi Noah” Harry waves kneeling down to Noah “Noah this is Ned” Harry says softly as Ned moves to sniff Noah causing him to giggle. He licks Noah’s chin before Harry calls him back “Hi Harry! Hi Ned!” Noah yells excitedly.
Noah leans over to pet Ned, he brushes over Neds soft fur before smiling at Harry. “Do you want me to go and order?” You ask softly, Harry smiles “that’d be great” he says softly “Noah do you want to come with Mummy?” You ask, he shakes his head “I stay with Ned?” He asks causing you to smile “is that ok?” You ask Harry, he simply nods smiling widely “yeah of course”.
You quickly race in ordering for you and Harry, you get a little juice for Noah and a cookie knowing he would get hungry at the park. You head back out with both yours and Harry’s coffees and something to eat for you both.
“Thank you so much” Harry smiles as you pass his coffee “I got you something to eat as well, I remember the carrot cake here was your favourite” he sighs a little “thank you” he says “you ok?” You ask softly noticing the sigh and slight drop in Harry’s face “yeah, I um, guess I forgot how well you know me” he smiles a little.
You head across the road to the park, Noah holding Harry’s hand wanting to be close to Ned “that is so cute” you smile watching them both.
Noah’s little legs were trying their best to keep up with Ned, Harry tying to hold Ned back a little so Noah wouldn’t topple. You find a quiet spot on the grass where Harry was able to let Ned off his leash letting Noah play with him properly. “Noah make sure you’re gentle please” you say as he starts running with Ned.
“I forgot how good their carrot cake was” Harry smiles “thank you for this” he says glancing over at you “anytime” you smile a little “I’ve missed hanging out with you” Harry’s says under his breath “this is a long way from going to parties together and getting as drunk as we could, but I missed hanging out with you too” you say softly laying back on the grass as Noah comes back over sitting between you and Harry with Ned.
Eventually, Harry lays back and Noah lays on your chest Ned snuggling into Noah. “Mummy” Noah says softly climbing you a little “yeah babe” you say wrapping your arm around him to stop him from falling back. “Can we keep Ned?” He asks curiously, you pout a little “I’m sorry baby, Ned is Harry’s puppy, we can’t keep him” Noah begins to fuss and you could feel a tantrum coming.
Harry noticed the change in Noah behaviour and rolls onto his front to look at Noah “Noah” he says softly “c’mere”. Noah pushes off you and walks to Harry. He leans over to Noah’s ear and whispers into it. Noah then runs back towards you kissing your cheek sloppily causing you to laugh hugging him tightly “what was that for?” You ask him giggling “it was from Harry!” Noah exclaims.
You look up at Harry who was already looking up you smiling nervously. You simply smile at him as Noah settled between you both again “I think we should do this more often” you say softly. Harry’s smile turns into more of a beam, “I’d love that” he says softly moving a little closer to you and Noah.
After a little while of Noah and Ned playing in between you and Harry, they both fell asleep. You brush Noah’s hair from his face a little kissing his head a little “you’re a great Mum” Harry says softly. You blush softly and lay your head on your arm “I think I just got lucky, Noah is an amazing kid” you say softly.
Harry smiles softly pushing your hair from your face. “Does he ever ask questions, about Ryan?” Harry asks. You shake your head a little “Ryan hasn’t spent time with him for a while, Noah probably doesn’t even know who he is anymore, he’s never asked why his Mum and Dad don’t live together and I don’t know what I would tell him if he did ask.”
“Y’know I’m here if you need anything, if you ever need someone to look after Noah so you can study, or if you want a night out, or just some time for you, I’m happy to help” Harry smiles a little. You giggle moving closer Ned moving over a little to Harry. You lean over the top of Noah and Ned who had settled again and place a soft kiss to Harry’s cheek “thank you H”
******
Three weeks had passed since you’d been to the park with Harry. In that three weeks you had been texting on and off, chatting after class and even studying in his office while he did admin work.
Tonight was one of those nights. Noah was staying with your Mum for the night while you were proof reading a paper due for one of your other classes for what felt like the fourteenth time.
You sigh a little sitting back in your chair. Harry glances up at you “y’ok?” He asks softly peering over the top of his glasses. You nod saving your document ensuring to not lose your work “yeah, I think it’s finally finished” you smile a little. Harry grins “good, I’m glad, you’ve worked really hard on it” he says starting to pack up his things “thank you for letting me use your office H” you add beginning to pack your own things “my pleasure” he smiles.
“Hey what are you doing tomorrow night? Noah’s been asking when he’s going to see Harry and Ned again” you giggle a little. Harry grins pushing his hands into his pockets “umm nothing, did you have something in mind?” He asks, you nod “Pizza and movies? At my place like we used to, but with Noah and you can bring Ned” you ask a little shy. Harry begins to nod “I’ll bring snacks” he smiles “text me your address?” He asks. You nod “yeah of course”.
You get organised and head home, you submit your paper online before heading to bed. You only had a morning class tomorrow which meant you could pick Noah up at lunch time. You slept like a log and accidentally slept through your alarm. You get yourself up and out the door in a rush meaning you didn’t look your best and the closest thing you got to breakfast was an iced coffee. Your morning, considering it’s hectic start dragged a little.
Leaving class you texted Harry your address before swinging around to your Mums to pick Noah up. “Noah James Mummy’s here!” You call out walking into your mums place he comes running out from the living room towards you “Mummy I missed you!” He yells latching himself onto your legs. You giggle hoisting him up into your arms “I missed you too buddy, did you have fun with grandma?” You ask Noah nods hugging you “so much fun! Grandma got me a new truck!” He smiles “wow, I hope you said thank you” you say softly as Noah begins to nod “Mummy has some fun news” you say softly walking off towards your Mums living room to find her “We are going to have dinner and movies at our place, with Harry and Ned” you smile as Noah to squirms in your arms clapping his hands.
“Who’s Harry?” Your mum asks inquisitively, Noah pipes up “Mummy’s teacher!” He yells giggling. You smile a little kissing his cheek “we were undergraduates together and really good friends, and now he’s my professor for one of my classes this semester” your Mum simply nods giving you a little bit of side eye “alright Mum that’s enough” you smile shaking your head “we better get going, can you go and get your bag please babe” you say putting Noah down.
You head home and get organised for the night giving the house a quick clean and lighting a few candles in the living room. You had given Noah a bath before getting him settled downstairs. Soon enough there was a knock on the door, you smile heading over opening the door seeing Harry standing there with a grocery bag of snacks in one hand and pizzas in the other “Hey…” you smile “I was happy to order the pizzas” you giggle letting Harry in. He shrugs “I figured I’d make things easier for you, I don’t mind” Harry smiles kissing your cheek softly moving past you Ned following behind him “oh my goodness Harry he’s getting so big” you laugh softly.
He placed everything on the kitchen counter before letting Ned off his leash. You unpacks the snacks as you watch smiling to yourself. You hear Noah yell from the living room “Mummy! Ned’s here!” You giggle a little taking the pizzas to the living room “I know baby, you know who else is here” you say softly sitting next to him on the couch “Harry’s here” you smile as Harry walks into the living room with snacks and a drink for you both. “Hi Harry!” Noah grins sitting up properly on the couch as you put some pizza on one of his little plates for him. “Here you go babe, eat up and we’ll watch a movie”
You eat dinner together watching a movie that Noah picked. It felt nice to have the structure of a family and that it was with Harry, but it also felt odd that you were having all these feelings about Harry.
Soon enough you had finished up with dinner and Noah was laying on your chest fighting off sleep as his movie continued to play. Ned had snuggled up at the end of the couch next to Harry’s feet looking very comfortable. “This is nice” Harry says softly glancing over at you. “Quite mundane to what we used to do” you say softly kissing Noah’s head.
Harry glances over at you and Noah “do you need to put him to bed?” He asks softly. You shake your head beginning to rub his back “No it’s ok, if I’m honest I like it when he falls asleep on me, I know it won’t last forever so I try and cherish it when it happens” you say softly. Eventually Noah fell asleep as his movie finished prompting you and Harry to pick something else.
Harry ended up picking a Marvel film knowing you would love it. By the time you were halfway through the film you and Harry were shoulder to shoulder with a throw over you both to keep warm. Eventually Noah’s steady breathing as well as the warmth from the blanket and the warmth radiating from Harry’s body caused you to become sleepy.
You yawn sitting up a little hugging Noah to your body “I’ll be right back, I’ll just put him to bed” you say softly. While you were up Harry took Ned out for a wee before you both got settled on the couch again. You sat closer to Harry before your head was resting on his shoulder. He shuffled down a little further so that you were laying on his chest instead, he wraps an arm around you rubbing your back a little.
“Thank you” you mumbles softly as Harry pulls the throw up a little more to keep you all warm. “What for?” He asks softly, you shrug a little “just for being here, I missed you….a lot H. Noah loves hanging out with you” you add backing up at him.
You sit with Harry in silence for a while as the TV kept playing the movie. “Can I ask something” he says softly. You nod lightly looking up at Harry “What happened to us?” He asks letting out a breath that he seemed to be holding in. You shrug a little “I guess we grew apart, we slowly stopped talking to one another when Ryan and I got together and next thing I knew I had a baby….I wish I hadn’t let him rule my life as much as he did” you say quietly.
Harry squeezes your shoulder before pulling you closer to him sad he places a kiss to your head causing you to blush. “Your doing an amazing job Y’know, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise” Harry says softly as you snuggle into him a little more “thank you” you whisper.
You sit in silence for around twenty minutes before you speak up “sometimes I wish I’d done things differently” you say softly “like what?” Harry asks, you shrug a little “well imagine what my life would be like if someone else was Noah’s Dad, or if I had finished my Masters while I was pregnant, or if I hadn’t gotten pregnant at all” you glance up at Harry who was pouting at you “c’mon you love being a mum” Harry says softly “I do, but sometimes I wish I could give Noah a normal family dynamic instead of just me” you say softly.
Harry hugs you tighter sighing a little bit not knowing what else to say. You sat together in silence for a while before you hear a whimper from the living room door you look up and see Noah standing in the doorway rubbing his eyes his bottom lip trembling “Noah, what’s wrong sweetheart?” You ask sitting up a little holding your arms open for him. He rushes over hugging you tightly, you lift him back onto the couch letting him snuggle into you as you lay back into Harry’s side. “Talk to Mummy what’s wrong bud?” You ask softly kissing his head as Noah’s tears begin to fall onto your shirt.
“I-I had a bad dream Mummy” he sniffles his little arms wrapped around your neck “do you want to talk to Mummy about it?” You ask softly rubbing his back “I had a dream that….I didn’t see Ned or Harry again, it makes me sad Mummy” he whimpers fresh tears falling from his little face. Harry glances at you “may I?” He asks softly, you nod “Noah” Harry says softly, Noah looks up at him with his red eyes “Ned and I really like spending time with you and Mummy, we’re going to be here as long as you and Mummy want us here, I promise”
You look up at Harry, tears stinging your own eyes. Noah looks up at him before shuffling across to give him a cuddle without saying anything. Harry hugs him tightly pulling you in closer simultaneously “thank you H” you whisper softly kissing his cheek. Harry looks down at you moving to rest his forehead to yours snuggling the three of you up together.
In that moment you knew this was what you wanted.
Noah stayed snuggled up on Harry’s chest. You snuggled yourself back into Harry’s side as he pressed play on the movie you were watching, turning the volume down slightly. After a mere ten minutes Noah was out like a light. “Want me to take him?” You whisper softly, Harry simply shakes his head “I got it” he smiles leaning over a little to kiss your forehead softly.
You move over a little allowing Harry to get up he tucks Noah’s legs either side of his torso, Noah’s delicate arms still around Harry’s neck. He got him tucked in before returning to the living room “I just left his door open a little I hope that’s ok?” Harry asks. You nod smiling “thank you so much”. Harry resumes his previous position next to you “anytime” he smiles lightly.
You snuggle back into Harry’s side as he wraps an arm around you again. You sit in silence for a while consumed by your own thoughts you sigh softly sitting up a little “H….are we going to get ourselves into trouble?” You ask turning to look at him. Harry’s brow creases “How so?” He whispers turning to face you. “This is only the second time we’ve hung out in four years and we’re snuggled up on my couch”.
Harry simply grins at you. He knew what you were asking.
“You think if we get caught hanging out things will go south?” He asks. You nod slightly “why are you smiling about this I’m serious H” you shove his shoulder a little.
“I know, I know, I’m sorry” he pouts “but….it’s only a semester, then after that I’m not your professor anymore, I’m your friend Harry” he explains softly trying to make light of the situation “Exams are in a few weeks and you’ll have a few weeks off we can hang out more before second semester”
Reaching over for the tv remote you pause the movie again “what are you getting at here Harry” you grumble a little. He sighs softly picking at his shirt. “I….just want to get through the semester, and see where things go, I like spending time with you and Noah, Ned and Noah are almost inseparable” he says softly not wanting to give anything else away.
You both settle back down into the couch, finishing the movie in an eerie, awkward silence. Once the movie had come to an end Harry helped you to clean up, Ned following you both to the kitchen. “I um, I should get going, thank you for having me….and Ned” Harry adds cause you to giggle “you’re both welcome anytime Harry, thank you for coming over it was really nice and thank you….for everything” you smile a little leaning up to kiss his cheek softly.
As you pull away you notice Harrys cheeks had gone a little red “text me when your home? So I know you got there?” You ask. Harry simply nods before responding “of course” he chuckles. He leans over giving you a quick hug which you gladly reciprocate.
You see Harry out before cleaning up a little more getting ready to head to bed yourself. You get tucked in and await Harry’s text which you soon received.
‘Home safe, Neds already passed out for the night, I had a great time, thank you again for having me x’
You smile reading his message before responding.
‘Thank you for tonight, Noah and I needed it, hopefully we can do it again soon. Goodnight H xx’
You set your phone down before quickly drifting off to sleep.
*****
Exams were heading your way…and fast.
Your final exam for the semester was today and it was the class you were most worried about, Harry’s.
You weren’t sure if you were worried about failing or if you were worried that your answers were going to be read and graded by Harry. Noah had been staying with your Mum for the week while you sat all your exams. You were really starting to miss him, you couldn’t have been more excited to be able to go and pick him up after your exam.
You got dressed and started packing your bag to head off when there was a knock at your door. You quickly scoot over and open it to a flower delivery man.
He reads out your name before handing you a beautiful bunch of mixed coloured blooms a little card poking out the top. You take them into the kitchen placing them on the counter. You open the card and smile widely,
‘Good luck today, we know you’ll do great, we’re so proud of you, all our love. Harry, Noah & Ned xxx’
You take a quick snap of the card and flowers sending it to Harry.
‘Thank you for the flowers they’re gorgeous, you boys are too sweet to me’
You send off the text quickly before heading out the door.
*****
Your final exam was the fastest three hours of your life, but you’d never felt better about an exam. Everything just seemed to flow well. You walked out feeling confident and satisfied that you had done everything you could.
You were heading to your car to go and get Noah when you notice Harry walking towards you “Hey” he says softly as he gets closer “come with me” he smirks. You give him a little side eye before obliging following him towards his office “what are we doing Harry?” You ask giggling softly.
“Just do as your told” Harry chuckles coming to a stop outside his office door “close your eyes” he smiles standing closer behind you his chest bumping your back as he was leaning over to open the door “watch your step” he whispers guiding your waist up to his office.
You step into Harry’s office your eyes still shut, you hear Harry close the door behind you “shuffle to your left a little” he whispers softly, you do as Harry asked before he steadies you in your spot “ok, stay there a second” he says before kissing your cheek softly. You blush and nod a little hearing Harry walk away from you.
“Alright, open” Harry calls out.
You open your eyes to see Noah on Harry’s hip holding yet another bunch of flowers. Lettering balloons spelling out ‘Congrats’ above the pair. You smile widely “oh my goodness, you two!” You giggle walking towards them “yay Mummy!” Noah yells kicking his feet out.
Harry chuckles smiling at Noah “give Mummy her flowers” Harry says to him quietly Noah quickly leans forward to hand you your flowers “thank you baby, can Mum have a kiss?” You ask softly leaning down to kiss his cheek, Noah returning it.
“How did you do all this?” You ask Harry playing with Noah’s hair. “Your mum, she was a huge help….she’s actually insisting that we go over there for dinner, all of us” Harry says softly “but if your not comfortable with me going I don’t have to it ok” you giggle a little at Harry rambling on “H….H, it’s ok, I want you to be there, please” you smile “plus, it’s the end of the semester, we said we would talk” you say biting your lip a little looking up at Harry a smirk covering his lips.
“I love the sound of that” Harry smiles. You kiss his cheek once more before Noah starts pushing at you “Mummy! Mummy! Can we go back to Grandmas now?” Noah asks. You nods “of course baby, would you like to carry Mummy’s flowers?” You ask as Harry lowers Noah to the ground who then runs off with your flowers to collect his other belongings.
While Noah is gone Harry places his hand on your waist pulling you closer to him “I’m so proud of you” Harry whispers leaning his forehead against yours before kissing your head you blush leaning further into Harry’s hold “couldn’t have done it without you H” you whisper wrapping your arms around him hugging him tightly as Noah came back.
You and Harry get yourselves and Noah organised making your way to your Mums in seperate cars.
You let yourself in Harry and Noah trailing along behind you. Your mum greets you with one of the biggest hugs you’d ever had “he’s very sweet, and very attractive” she whispers to you quiet enough that Harry couldn’t hear. Pulling away you glare at her “behave” you warn knowing what she was thinking. She shrugs “Noah loves him, he clearly likes you silly girl” she complains. You groan a little simply walking away “love you Mum” you smile as you walk off.
*****
After dinner your mum offered to give Noah a bath giving you an opportunity to just wind down. You sit down with a glass of wine in the sun room under the night sky.
Your mind finally feeling as though it was at peace.
A few minutes pass, you could hear your Mum and Noah laughing from the bathroom. You smile a little relaxing back into your seat.
“Y’ok?” Harry asks causing you to jump a little before nodding “yeah I’m great” you smile. Harry comes to sit next to you “sorry, I didn’t mean to frighten you”.
You hum acknowledging Harry’s apology. “I know we said we’d talk” you start before Harry takes your hand “it’s ok, you’re exhausted” Harry says softly “besides I only have one question” he adds “Y/N I would love to take you on a date, if that’s something that you would like?” Harry asks softly.
You look up at him turning your body a little “like a proper date?” You ask a little surprised. Harry simply nods “yeah like we’ll go to dinner and a movie or bowling or mini golf or we could do all of it” he smiles as you rest your head on his shoulder.
You reach over taking Harry’s hand playing with his fingers “I like mini golf” you smile a little looking up at Harry, he grins pulling you closer “H, what about Noah?” You asks softly. He shrugs a little “we may have accidentally already talked about it” Harry says looking at you a little worried. “What do you mean?” You asks softly turning to face Harry a little more.
“When I picked Noah up today, he started asking questions about…us, he took it really well, wanted to know if you and I were ‘boyfriend and girlfriend’ I asked him how he would feel if we were to date and hang out more, he got really excited about it. I hope that’s ok, I should have asked you first I’m sorry.” Harry says softly squeezing your hand.
You look up at him pouting “Harry….” You whimper softly “that’s the sweetest thing I’ve ever heard” as you were about to lean over to peck the corner of Harry’s lips Noah came running in, his little body covered in his Spider-Man pyjamas, he jumps up to climb into yours and Harry’s lap “Mummy, I’m all clean” he says squishing between you both causing you to giggle. You ruffle his still damp hair before kissing his head “you smell so fresh and clean dude” he smiles giving you a hug before whispering in your ear “can I cuddle with you and Harry?” He asks softly you sigh happily nodding “of course babe” he settles between you both Harry’s arm still around you his other one coming to rest on Noah’s back, yours brushing through Noah’s hair.
“Y’know this is everything I’ve ever wanted” Harry whispers, you hum snuggling into him more “me too….I like the idea of this being our family, you me Noah and Ned” you say looking up at Harry.
“My god your perfect” he sighs leaning down nudging your nose with his before kissing your softly, his tender lips matching perfectly to your own being as gentle as he could with you as to not disturb Noah.
You hum and giggle a little against Harry’s lips feeling like a teenager sneaking around not only your son but your mum as well.
*****
A few weeks had passed since your final exam and you had been essentially inseparable from Harry since. You had been spending a lot of time together with Noah and alone and making things work in between your busy holiday work schedule and between Harry preparing for his new students the coming semester.
You had become incredibly trusting of Harry with a lot of things, including caring for Noah. You had been working a lot lately which meant you couldn’t always rely on your Mum to look after Noah, which meant Harry had offered to step up.
You were apprehensive at first but after leaving them together for a few hours one afternoon to come home to the pair cooking dinner and dancing around the kitchen to Noah’s favourite songs. You knew then you could trust Harry with anything, it made you feel safe.
*****
You were snuggled up with Harry on his couch one night Noah already in the spare bed asleep. “I could really get used to this” you whisper softly glancing up at Harry.
He smiles down at you kissing your forehead “me too” he smiles gently. You giggle a little “you’ve got a real Daddy vibe happening at the moment” you blurt out without thinking. Harry moves to look at you a little surprised “y’think so?” He asks, you simply nod “Noah loves it, and honestly I kinda do too, it’s really attractive” you smirk biting your lip a little.
Harry chuckles a little connecting his lips with your own in a needy kiss as you hoist your leg up over his lap causing Harry to reach down grabbing at your ass to pull you into his lap. You giggle as your tongues and teeth clash in what had turned out to be a messy make out, eventually without realising Harry had started grinding up into your core as he pulled and tugged at your bottom lip with hip teeth and nibbled at the skin of your neck.
“Should we go upstairs?” Harry mumbles against you as you tug his shirt over his head and throw it off to the side not caring where it landed.
“I’m fine here” you pant as Harry’s hands make their way up to your chest under the t-shirt of his you had borrowed to wear as pyjamas.
“Good because so am I” Harry smirks picking you up laying you on your back on the couch. You giggle, Harry placing his lips against yours once more as you wrap your legs around him.
Harry continued to grind into you before he began kissing down your neck. He glances up at you for a moment smirking moving down your body to your thighs. He kisses the inside of each thigh before kissing your cloth covered clit causing you to moan out softly. Harry pushed your shirt up slowly with his nose as he kisses up your torso.
“Gunna let me taste you?” Harry mumbles as he makes it to your lips. You nod running your hands through Harry’s hair “please” you whimper pecking his lips several times.
Harry grips your thighs kissing back down your body until he makes it to your panty line. Harry slowly pulls your panties down your thighs tossing them to the floor “so needy for me baby” Harry mumbles placing a kiss to your clit, you whimper softly placing your hand on Harry’s on your hip.
Harry kisses down to your entrance before flattening his tongue against you. You sigh at the feeling of Harry against you as he laps you up his tongue making it back to your clit before he started alternating between licking and sucking. You let your knees drop further relaxing into Harry’s touch.
He soon adds to your stimulation slipping two fingers inside you curling them slightly causing you to roll your hips meeting Harry’s motions. You bring your fist to your mouth trying to stifle the loud moans trying to escape as to not wake Noah.
You soon felt a familiar knot beginning to form in your lower belly, your breathing picked up as you grabbed for Harry’s free hand. You whimper softly as Harry’s movements quicken sensing your were close to the edge. “Harry I’m going to…” you take in a sharp breath ready to finish your sentence when Harry removes his fingers abruptly before removing his mouth from your now drenched and throbbing pussy.
You let out a frustrated moan sitting up a little to look at Harry “what the hell?” You plead as he smirks kissing your thighs. He quickly moves back to encapsulate your lips in his own for a few moments before pulling away a little “edging” he murmurs causing you to huff and push his chest lightly “fucking tease” you whisper pecking his lips lightly “but two can play that game” you smirk against him before untucking yourself from his hold and walking away to the master bedroom and attached ensuite.
There was no way you were letting Harry get away with this, but you wanted to test him to see how far he would go.
You leave both Harry’s bedroom door and the ensuite door ajar not wanting to send Harry the wrong message. You turn the shower on getting the bathroom nice and steamy before stepping in you kept your back to the shower door for a few minutes before you head someone clear their throat behind you. You spin around and see Harry gawking at you from the doorway, still naked and definitely still aroused.
You giggle a little biting your lip softly “Yes, Professor Styles?” You ask softly tilting your head back a little letting the water run over your naked body. You notice Harry’s hands twitch as he makes his way to the shower.
He slips in behind you your back still facing him his cold finger tips grazing your hips “y’think you can tease me?” He murmurs into your neck nibbling at a few spots before kissing over them as one of his hands reaches down your torso to your hip before cupping your heat “do you think that was a good idea baby?” He asks softly before surprising you plunging two fingers back into you as he had done on the couch.
You gasp at the feeling your heels leaving the ground for a moment your tip toes holding you up. “You’re so beautiful” Harry whispers holding you closer to him “gunna let me fuck you baby?” He asks kissing your neck again. You nod against him weak at the knees for him again like you hadn’t walked away from this tease of a man a mere five minutes ago.
Harry turns you pushing you against the bathroom wall bending you over a little to keep you steady, “ready sweet girl?” Harry asks positioning himself at your entrance he pushes one of your legs out a little more to help him gain better access to what he desired most.
You whimper at the feeling of the cold tile against your chest before a gasp and an unexpected moan escapes your lips as Harry plunged himself into you, Harry grips your hips tightly groaning softly at the feeling of your soft walls clenching around him. He places some soft delicate kisses up your spine “so tight for me baby” Harry whispers kissing your jaw you lean back in his hold a little humming.
His hands begin to wander to your front cupping your breasts giving deep, slow thrusts where you were connected. A soft moan escapes your lips as Harry draws your ass back into him. Harry runs a hand up your spine nibbling at your neck before he bends you over gripping your hip “H…” you pant softly “fuck me hard H… please” you beg clenching around Harry causing him to groan.
Harry bends down to your ear kissing just under it “want me to destroy that tight little pussy baby?” Harry mumbles into your ear. You open your mouth to respond when Harry gives a single hard thrust causing your knees to become weak and a whimper to escape your lips.
“Fuck Harry” you moan “don’t tease me H” you mumble. You hear Harry chuckle behind you kissing your shoulder “y’sure about that?” Harry asks massaging your ass as he goes back to slow pumps causing the tension to build in your tummy again.
“I’m sure” you respond clenching around Harry again causing him to groan “fuck sweetheart, you feel fuckin’amazing” Harry moans as he delivers another hard thrust before slowing down again. You smirk clenching him again. You hear an snigger leave Harry’s lips before his hands came to grip your waist “I warned you” he whispers into your ear before kissing your jaw smirking against your skin.
Harry grips your hips with both hands as he begins to thrust into you hard. “So fucking good H” you pant, he pulls you into him until your ass was flush with his hips, cock buried deep inside you, you gasp a little whimpering.
Harry rubs your hips kissing your back “c’mere” Harry mumbles pulling out abruptly pushing your hips to turn you around to face him. “Why’d you stop again?” You whine causing Harry to smirk “just wanted to look at you” he smiles. Harry reaches over turning the shower off before reaching down picking you up to wrap your legs around his torso.
Harry moves from the shower out to the bathroom counter sitting you on the edge before he smirks at you “let me finish what we started?” Harry asks. You giggle and nod “if you don’t you’ll be in trouble” you smirk pulling him towards you connecting your lips to his.
You pull away kissing down his neck just under his ear “make me cum H” you whisper in his ear. Harry moans softly “so needy for me” he smirks. Harry guides himself back to your entrance. You sigh as Harry pushes himself back into your entrance and wastes no time in fucking into you mercilessly.
Harry had edged you so much that it took near on no time for you to be clenching around Harry trying to hold off your own orgasm “H I’m so close, fucking me so well babe” you moan. Harry grips your thigh with one hand and moves to rub your clit with the thumb of his other hand. “Let go for me baby, cum on my cock please” he begs nibbling at your neck.
Your toes begin to curl and your legs begin to shake at Harry’s request you grip the edge of the bathroom counter as you begin to unravel “Harry…..” you whimper rolling your hips into him “fuck!” You moan out as one of the strongest orgasms you’d ever had washed over your body you clench and pulse around Harry who three pumps later was filling you with his cum “babe, such fucking good pussy” Harry moans holding your left hip like his life depends on it.
Harry stills inside you panting into your neck. He slowly moves his face to connect his lips with yours you wrap your hands in Harry’s hair “so good to me” he mumbles on your lips you hum smiling “you’re so amazing H” you whisper kissing him again.
******
Harry eventually gets you cleaned up and carried you off to his bed tucking you both in. You were chatting away the door still just ajar when you hear a little voice coming from the hallway “Mummy” Noah whimpers “yeah baby, come here” you respond. He rushes through the door towards you, you pick him up from the side of the bed pulling him into your chest “y’ok bud?” You ask softly rubbing his back a little his tired eyes looking up at you “I want to cuddle with Daddy” he whimpers softly.
You glance at Harry for a moment before looking back at Noah, he’d never really brought up his Dad until now and if you were honest you were a little shocked by it “what do you mean sweetheart?” You ask, Noah looked at you then at Harry. He squirms from your arms into Harry’s arms “Cuddle with Daddy” Noah whispers snuggling into Harry’s chest.
That’s when it dawned on you Noah was calling Harry, Daddy. Your jaw drops as you look at Harry who was seeming having the same realisation, tears stinging his eyes. You look at Noah kissing his head softly “baby, did you just call Harry Daddy?”, Noah look up at you with his wide eyes and nods “Stella at daycare said that Daddy’s spend time with Mummy’s and…and spend time with kids and…and Harry does that for me, did I do something wrong mummy?” He asks his little bottom lip beginning to tremble.
You and Harry glance at each other before Harry shakes his head “not at all Noah it’s ok….I’d love to be your Dad bud” Harry says softly pushing Noah’s hair from his face. Noah looks up and nods “yes please”.
In that very moment you felt yourself becoming anxious, your heart knew that this was everything you wanted, but your mind was racing with everything that could go wrong with this happening. What if Ryan found out. What if Noah eventually worked out Harry wasn’t his Dad. What if Ryan contested for full custody.
You let Noah settle trying to play off your own anxieties before kissing Harry’s cheek “I just need some water” you say softly sliding out of bed. You head out to the kitchen before heading out into Harry’s small backyard to check on Ned.
Almost twenty minutes pass and you still hadn’t returned to bed, leading Harry to go and tuck a now sleeping Noah back into bed before moving out to the kitchen. Still not being able to find you Harry ventures outside when he sees the door slightly cracked open.
He comes to settle next to you on the patio a glass of water in one of your hands the other petting Ned who had settled at your side. “Love, what are y’doing out here?” Harry asks softly. You sigh a little “I don’t know, just got a little overwhelmed I think” you say softly. Harry reaches out to tuck some loose hair behind your ear “Should we talk about it?” He asks. You shrug a little “I love that your willing to take on a parent role for Noah, but I’m also scared, what if Noah finds out your not his biological Dad, what if Ryan try’s to get full custody….what if we don’t work out?” You begin to ramble your anxieties coming to light, your body begins to shake your breathing begins to quicken and tears begin to build in your eyes.
Harry noticed instantly and wrapped an arm around you pulling you into his chest “Hey, c’mon babe I’m here everything’s ok” he whispers kissing your temple as you rest your head in the crook of his neck “we should have talked about it first I’m sorry” Harry whispers rubbing your shoulder “But, I’m not going anywhere, you and Noah mean the world to me Y/N, it’s us and our boys” Harry says softly pulling you closer to kiss you softly. You couldn’t help but smile a little on his lips “our boys” you whisper resting your head to Harry’s.
Hearing Harry talk about being a family settled your anxiety enough for you to head back up to bed, but there was still going to be plenty to navigate.
Eventually Harry got you snuggled into his chest just the way he liked.
You woke the next morning to find an empty space next to you. You hum softly rolling over grabbing Harry’s pillow pulling it towards you.
Taking in his scent you couldn’t help but smile, you wrap your arms around it pulling it to your chest closing your eyes listening out for any other signs that Harry was awake.
Within a few minutes you could hear Harry trying to softly pad his way back to bed to his failure the weight of his large feet giving him away.
“You’re not as quiet as you think Styles” you mumble your face still half buried in his pillow, eyes still closed.
He lets out a breathy chuckle “thought you were asleep” he says softly leaning over to kiss your temple. You giggle a little shaking your head eyes still closed before whining a little “why do you have to smell so good, I never want to leave this bed” you open one eye to glance at Harry who was kneeling at the side of the bed smirking back at you.
“You don’t ever have to if you don’t want to, I’d wait on you hand and foot until we’re old and grey if that’s what you wanted” Harry smiles, you hide your face further into the pillow to conceal your blushing cheeks from Harry, who instead grabbed your chin tilting your face towards him before kissing you softly.
You hum against his warm, plump lips, you would never get over this feeling, this feeling of being loved by someone you truely loved as well. It was something mundane to you but wouldn’t trade it for anything. You had an indescribable amount of love, affection and passion for the man in front of you.
Pulling away slowly and a little reluctantly, you scan Harry’s face caressing his cheek lightly before smiling a little as he places little kisses to the insides of your palms. You stare at him a little while longer before revealing your biggest secret “Harry…” he looks up at you at the mention of his name, you smile a little continuing to caress his cheeks “I love you”.
Harry stares at you for a moment before he breaks out in a wide smile and red cheeks that he tried to hide behind your hands. He leans closer so his forehead was resting to yours he places two of the softest yet most passionate kisses to your lips before looking you dead in the eye and responding.
“I love you…and Noah, I’m so happy with you both in my life” he whispers before connecting his lips to yours once more.
You pull Harry’s arms signalling to him to climb up on the bed with you. The passion and love you felt towards this man right now had no right to be contained.
You had morning breath, your hair an absolute mess and had Harry’s t-shirt from last night covering your torso and no panties. But none of that mattered just words couldn’t describe how you felt about Harry.
You needed him, and by his next course of action he needed you as well. Harry’s lips never left yours he managed to push his shorts off leaving his fresh hoodie on and pulling your t-shirt up to enable access to what you both needed.
You bring your knees up and let them drop for Harry to shuffle up in between them. He grabs the covers behind him and pulls them up over you both, the back of his mind still aware that there is a child in the house who is as unpredictable as his mother.
Harry slowly pulls away to position himself at your entrance gliding into you with ease. A satisfied moan leaves your lips as you relax back into the pillows around you. One hand making it’s way to the back of Harry’s neck pulling him in to kiss you once again.
Harry kisses you a few times before whispering in your ear “you are music to my ears sweet girl”. He begins delivering deep but gentle thrusts to you wanting to savour every single second with you.
You tilt your head back grinding into Harry’s thrusts. His public bone was meeting with your clit in perfect time and creating the perfect feeling to you. Harry’s forehead meets yours as he continues to thrust into you.
It really wasn’t very long before your toes were beginning to curl trying to hold off on your orgasm, the passion in the room mixed with Harry’s talents had you both trying to hold onto the inevitable mix of fluids.
You open your eyes and see the crease in Harry’s brow his mouth agape eyes squeezed shut. You move your hands to his cheeks directing his lips to yours as you wrap your arms around him pulling him closer to you. Your arms slowly make their way down his back where you push down at his belt line enabling you to grind your hips into his even more causing Harry to groan on your lips.
He reluctantly pulls away from the kiss resting his head to your own once more. “I….you….Jesus fuck” he pants as his thrusts become a little sloppier and your grip becomes tighter as your body threatens to burst.
Your eyes meet Harry’s and he simply nods. You scan his face once more as Harry delivered the thrust to end it all. You begin to squirm under him as the middle of your back leaves the mattress your legs come to squeeze at Harry’s hips this seemingly sending him to the peak of his own high.
He grabs at your hip delivering another few deep thrusts before moaning out your name in pure bliss as you both shake and whimper tangled in each other Harry’s body collapses onto your own his hot breath covering your neck.
You both lay in silence for a few minutes your hands rubbing through Harry’s hair as he rubs circles into your thigh.
Harry slowly moves to hover over you once more leaning down kissing you with the utmost tenderness he slowly pulls away not even opening his eyes “you…you are everything” he whispers kissing both of your cheeks opening his eyes to look down at you.
Your eyes meet his and you both smile “I’m your everything H” you whisper pecking his lips again. You wanted to stay wrapped up like this forever especially considering how intimate the entire moment had been. Harry went back to laying on your chest as he softened inside of you you rub your hands through his hair a while but before long Noah was calling for his Mummy.
You sigh softly and giggle a little “at least he didn’t let himself in I guess” you comment causing Harry to laugh kissing at your neck “I’ll go get him” he mumbles into your skin kissing your jaw then your lips before slowly pulling himself away from and out of you simultaneously.
You gasp a little at the now empty feeling. Harry places a final kiss to your forehead before pulling his shorts on walking out of the room to the spare room which Harry had insisted now be Noah’s room when you stayed over.
You wait a few minutes expecting Harry to simply bring him back to you for the three of you to cuddle in bed for a while. When almost five minutes pass you get up find a pair of panties and shuffle over to the ensuite to clean up before heading downstairs legs exposed to the cool morning air. Harry’s shirt still covering your frame.
You walk into the kitchen to find Harry and Noah making an absolute mess, but it was the cutest mess you had ever seen. “Hi my loves, what on earth is happening here?” You giggle a little moving to the kitchen island where they were situated. You place a kiss to Noah’s cheek “Mummy! We’re making breakfast!” Noah yells excitedly.
You look up at Harry who was already staring down at you, his hand finds your waist and his lips find yours his hand moving down your back to your bum giving it a light squeeze.
“Thank you for getting him up and organising breakfast” you smile up at Harry. He simply shrugs “no hassle at all, I’ve got you babe” he winks causing you to giggle a little “he needed a wee and said he was hungry so I figured there was no better time to get up and make breakfast” Harry adds smiling.
“You…are the absolute best” you say softly pecking Harry’s cheek “not at all sweetheart, I’m just a man who adores having you both here” Harry smirks. You blush and hug his side ruffling Noah’s hair “can I do anything to help?” You ask softly “noooo Mummy, we don’t need help I big boy!” Noah butts in causing you to laugh “yes chef” you smile and move to sit on the other side of the island.
Harry hands you a cup of coffee which you gladly take “thank you” you smile. You watch the pair in awe as they continue to make a mess.
You help Noah to set the table while Harry cooks some eggs and pancakes the kitchen beginning to smell of the bacon that Harry had in the oven.
You sat down together as a family and ate breakfast. Noah still making a mess. You sit back watching him for a while smiling to yourself. “Hey” Harry says softly wrapping his hand around yours “you ok?” He asks a crease in his brow. You nod smiling “I’m amazing” you squeeze his hand in return.
You sit in silence for a little while longer before Harry speaks up again “Uni goes back soon” you glance over at him and nod “yeah only a week to go” you smile “y’nervous?” Harry asks softly “your last semester ever” he teases.
You raise an eyebrow in his direction “I’m excited to have more time for you and Noah” you say softly leaning over to kiss Harry’s cheek. “Would you be upset if I tell the University about us? I don’t really want to hide us”.
You sit thinking on Harry’s words for a moment the only background noise being Noah playing with Ned “I think we should tell them, better to disclose the relationship we have now rather than get caught up with it somehow…..I don’t know about you but I don’t really have intentions of keeping my hands to myself now that you’re not my professor anymore”
Harry simply chuckles pulling you into his lap “I’ll always be your professor” he winks kissing your cheek causing you to giggle and smile nestling your head into his side “I hope so, because that’s all I want” you say softly pecking his lips.
****
The first week back had begun and Tuesday mornings you had an early lecture at 7:30 which meant a 6am start for you. Harry had been amazing and offered to organise Noah in the mornings and then drop in at day care before he started his own busy schedule.
You had both been staying with each other on and off and even having a few nights alone here and there. You’d even made space in your wardrobe for Harry which was apparently a big move that Harry appreciated and worshipped you for.
Pulling yourself from the shower you dry off a little before shuffling to your wardrobe to grab some clothes. You glance over at Harry who was still asleep his curls covered half of his face you smile a little to yourself before turning you attention back to your clothes.
Pulling a sweater over your head you spot a pair of strong, tattooed arms sneaking their way around you. You hum as Harry snuggles his head into your neck kissing your jaw “good morning” Harry mumbles the rasp in his voice evident “good morning baby” you smile softly rubbing your hands through his hair, “y’smell s’good” Harry groans.
You giggle and smile kissing the side of Harrys head “thank you…” you just stand together for a moment Harry rocking you from side to side a little “I need to shower” Harry grumbles, you giggle turning in Harry’s grip “I’ll go and make Noah’s lunch, want some breakfast?” You ask softly “yes please” Harry smirks.
He slowly lets you go pecking your lips a few times “I love you” Harry whispers against your lips. “I love you too H” you wrap your arms around him kissing him softly “meet you in the kitchen” you smile on his lips. He gives you a final squeeze before letting you go.
****
You make your way to the kitchen quickly pulling together Noah’s lunch before moving onto yours and Harry’s while also making breakfast for everyone. Harry soon appears dressed and ready for his day just missing his blazer his hair still damp. He puts some coffee on kissing your cheek lightly “can I grab the little man?” He asks softly.
You smile and nod “yes please that would be a huge help thank you Harry” you look up at him with a smile, he winks back at you heading down to Noah’s room. He was only gone a few seconds before he was calling out to you “Babe…Y/N!, fuck quickly!”
When Harry called out for you, you file hear the urgency in his voice you drop what you were doing and run to Noah’s room. You immediately notice Noah’s hair wet with sweat and his little body pale in colour.
“What happened?!” You ask frantically coming to Harry’s side as he tried to wake Noah “he was just like this, what do we do?” Harry was panicking, you could hear it, but you didn’t have time for him to have a meltdown right now.
“Call an ambulance Harry” you say going to pick Noah up, as soon as your face is near him you hear a gurgle and wheeze with his breathing. You squeeze his little hand “Noah” you say firmly in an attempt to wake him. You shake his shoulder a little and he begins to cough, vomit sputtering from him mouth “Harry hurry up!” You yell pulling Noah from his bed laying him across you in an attempt to help him clear his chest.
He begins frantically coughing causing another vomit. Harry races back in his phone to his ear as he spoke to the operator. Noah continues to struggle and before you knew it the unthinkable happened, his coughing and vomiting stopped his eyes rolled back in his head “no…no, Harry tell them to hurry!” You yell as Noah’s lips turned blue and he began to seize in your arm.
Harry had become frantic on the phone yelling at the operator to hurry as you placed Noah on the carpet to try and support his breathing better, tears began to fall down your cheeks as your son convulsed on the floor in front of you. You support him on his side to maintain his airway as his seizure comes to an end. You look up to see Harry gone, he soon returned with two paramedics following behind him.
They started to throw around a heap of words and terms you nor Harry understood. They begin to ready Noah to go to hospital briefly talking to you about where they were going and what they had done so far but not much more than that. You look at Harry concern covering both his and your own face, “go with him” Harry says softly “I’ll follow behind” he adds kissing your head softly.
They load Noah up into the ambulance and you clamber in with him. Harry quickly grabbed the essentials including a change of clothes for you to replace your vomit covered ones before getting in his car heading off to the hospital. By the time Harry arrived they had Noah in a paediatric room in the emergency department.
“How’s he doing?” Harry asks softly placing the bag he brought with him down. You shrug a little “I don’t really know, they think he has meningitis” you sigh resting your head in your hands. “C’mere” Harry whispers pulling you into his chest “he’s gunna be ok” Harry says softly kissing your hair, “should I call your Mum?” Harry asks softly rubbing your back.
You shake your head a little tucking yourself into Harry’s hold “I’ll call her” you whimper a little. Harry gives you a squeeze before letting you go kissing your forehead.
You step out to call your mum, halfway through your call Harry sticks his head out of the room “y/n…he’s waking up” Harry says softly. You quickly end the call to your mum stepping back into the room seeing Noah looking quiet groggy but awake looking around at his unusual surroundings.
“Hi baby” you whisper softly “how y’feeling?” You ask softly. “Mummy” he whimpers you lean over and kiss his forehead. You sit with Noah for a while as he rests Harry watching you both.
Soon enough the doctor knocks on the door before stepping in “Miss y/l/n, we have Noah’s results….it is meningitis, but it’s bacterial….at this stage he’s had a prophylactic dose of IV antibiotics which he will no longer require. We’ll keep the fluids going and keep his temperature at bay, all going well you’ll be able to take Noah home this afternoon, he’ll just need the rest of the week to rest, I understand Noah goes to daycare?” The doctor asks glancing between you and Harry.
You nod “yeah he goes to the day care at the University” you say softly “it’s most likely that’s were the infection has originated” the doctor explains. You nod a little “what about the seizure? Do we need to worry?” You ask Noah snuggling into you. “No, we’re confident the seizure was due to his temperature provided he has regular paracetamol to keep his temp down he’ll make a full recovery” you nod “thank you so much”.
The doctor smiles before walking out you glance over at Harry letting out a breath you felt like you’d be holding in since this morning Harry moves kissing your head and Noah’s “oh my goodness” you sigh “y’did so well buddy” Harry whispers softly. “Mummy and Daddy love you so much” he adds. You look up at him a pout on your lips “I love you” you whimper, Harry cups your face with his hands kissing you passionately “I love you sweetheart, you’ve done so so well” Harry says softly shuffling you both across the little hospital bed pulling you both into his chest “and your so brave little man”
You all snuggle up for the day you and Harry taking turns keeping an eye on Noah. Eventually at 8pm that night almost 14 hours since the ordeal began you were heading home. Noah was tired. You were all tired. You all needed a good night sleep.
After discussing with Harry and Harry being adamant that it would work, he decided he would stay home with Noah the days you had classes so you wouldn’t miss anything and the days that you had off Harry would go to work instead. You get Noah in the bath and ready for bed, both you and Harry being too anxious to let him sleep in his own room you decide to let him sleep in your bed Harry opting to sleep in Noah’s bed to give you enough room.
You tuck Noah into your bed him quickly falling asleep. You head off to shower with Harry who already had the bathroom steamed up you smile softly seeing him waiting for you towel wrapped about his waist loosely.
“Hey you” he smiles softly “y’doing ok sweetheart?”Harry asks pulling you into his chest. You nod softly resting your head on Harry’s chest “yeah H, I’m ok, what about you?” You ask he nods kissing your head. You look up at him wrapping your arms around his shoulders “thank you….for being the best Dad to Noah H, it means everything to me”.
Harry hums “This is our family babe, you don’t have to thank me….speaking of family, Mum and Gemma have been asking when they get to see you” Harry smiles pushing your hair behind your ear.
You giggle placing some small kisses to Harry’s neck, “why don’t we go for a weekend when Noah’s better?” You ask looking up at Harry who was smiling down at you “you’d really want to go for a weekend?” He asks softly.
You nod pulling him to the shower “I’d love to Harry, plus it’d be nice for the three of us to get out of the city for a weekend, take Ned with us, I think we need it” you say as you undress, Harry doesn’t say a word causing you to look up at him “Harry?” You ask giggling a little his eyes move to meet yours a smirk on his lips “sorry I didn’t hear anything after you took your shirt off” you laugh continuing to undress Harry’s eyes glued to you.
You stand in front of him the shower still going “coming in?” You ask tugging on Harry’s towel causing it to fall to the floor, he simply nods eyeing you up and down as you step under the water you turn your back to him and he wraps his around around your waist pulling you to his chest placing kisses across your right shoulder.
Harry begins to slowly sway barely just enough for you to feel the movement but also enough for you to relax into his hold. “Who would have thought that you being my professor would have gotten us to here” you say softly Harry’s thumbs rubbing circles at your sides before turning you to face him.
He places a kiss to your forehead then your nose before pausing at your lips “I’ll always be your professor m’love” Harry replies before placing his lips to yours. You kiss back softly smiling against him. You slowly pull away resting your forehead to Harry’s before looking up at him.
“This is everything” Harry hums pulling you closer “it really is” you smile before placing your lips to Harry’s onceonce more.
Harry was right. This was absolutely everything.
*****
A/n - this was a super dooper long one, but if you stuck around to the end, thank you, I hope you enjoyed it!
But, what if Kuchel knitted or crocheted outfits for her new grandbaby?
And continues as they grow?! Am I tearing? Maybe!
Oh
My
GOD!
Yes 💕 she'd be so good at it too. She wouldn't make you terrible things, but actually be rather fashionable and colour coordinated. She'd use the best stuff, so everything is super soft to the touch. Your babies will be comfy, safe and warm.
She'd make them the BEST little hats in the world. She makes them so good your friends will be asking if she can make them for them and then she starts a little business going on ehehe.
Charlotte: French name meaning freedom
Summary: Charlotte was exactly like her father, stubborn to the core. Even though Levi would never allow her to join the military, she gives him a run for his money. Read as your teenage daughter turns your husbands day completely upside down when he agrees to have her join him for work for a week. Who knew someone other than you could break the Corporals composure so easily.
Requested by Anonymous
Master List | Requests | Next Chapter
“No”, Levi said firmly, taking another sip from his tea. “But DaAaAad!”, Charlotte whined. Levi ignored her closing his eyes while taking another sip from his cup. “Levi, you could at least take a minute to think about it”, you chimed in from the kitchen. He opened his eyes, glaring at you from the breakfast table. “No”, he repeated, his tone more severe. “I am an adult now!”, Charlotte argued sitting next to him. He turned his glare to your sixteen-year-old daughter. “Dad please!”, she pleaded her voice becoming more desperate. Levi remained in a frown.
Levi had promised Charlotte that he would give her whatever she wanted for her birthday. Of course, the only thing she wanted was for him to let her join the army. And sure enough, he had denied and blocked her every step of the way. She had tried to sneakily signup, several times might you add. Tried to even go to Erwin, Levi’s superior. And gone as far as convinced even you. But to no avail. He would never allow her to join.
“You’re not joining”, he said pissed off, “That’s final”, his impassive expression returning. Silence. Charlotte’s eyes welled up. You sighed, stopping loitering in the kitchen knowing perfectly well that you would need to intercede between them yet again. They had been having this fight for a month and half since her birthday to be exact. It always ended the same way, him denying her and her crying.
They normally had a great relationship, an unspeakable bond of trust of father and daughter. They understood each other in a way that you, even as her mother, could never completely comprehend. Which is why watching them have a go almost every other day was really painful to watch.
“Why?”, she asked, tears ready to fall. This was the first time she asked him for his reasoning. He turned to look at her icy grey eyes, the pain in her eyes palpable enough to soften his expression. He sighed loudly, giving in to her request. “I would never want to feel responsible if something were to happen to you”, he said sincerely. Hearing him broke your heart.
Levi could be many things, but even through his thick layered skin, he was ultimately human. Still only a man; flesh and blood. Still felt grief from every single one of his comrade’s deaths. And even if he rarely showed it, he had an almost unmovable sense of morality. Not even humanity’s greatest soldier could take in his shoulder the death of his only child. Even as a child if she had been out of his sight for what he thought of as too long, he would feel panicked. Not even when you were in the Corps had he felt this unnerved. You might be his soul but Charlotte was his heart and joy.
“But dad, even mum used to be on the force!”, she tried again, her voice shakier than last time. “She isn’t any more”, he pointed out. Both of them turn to look at you for some kind of support. You sighed again approaching them from across your standing position opposite them. “How about this”, you began sitting diagonally from both your husband and daughter, they both leaned in eager to hear your opinion, “take Charlotte for a week in the HQ”, you suggested. Charlotte’s eyes sparkled obviously appreciating your suggestion. Levi, on the other hand, had his eyes narrowed poignantly glaring at you. Oh boy, you knew that look. It was the look he used when he would make you pay for whatever you had done.
“Common dad”, Charlotte pleaded calling back his attention. He stared down at her, “No”, he answered. “But you said you would give me anything I wanted”, she insisted placing her hands on his knees. He stood his silent ground. “What if I don’t leave you side?”, she offered. He still didn’t say anything. “I’ll even clean your office”, she added, her eyes fuller than ever. He closed his eyes, sighing in defeat. “One week”, he finally replied. She immediately stood up screaming “YAY”, and then proceeded to twirl around the room. “I’m not done yet brat”, he said his eyes narrowing at her celebration in disapproval. “You’ll wake up every day at 5:00”, he began listing his conditions, “You do exactly as I say”, he continued, “And most importantly”, he emphasised, “You cannot leave my sight”. Charlotte who had been listening intently to his every word nodded furiously, “I promise!”, she said happily and proceeded to run up the stairs presumably to pick exactly what she was going to wear.
“Tch”, Levi said watching her disappear up the stairs. “You’re not off the hook either”, he said with half-lidded eyes. You rolled your eyes. “You’re just as bad as that brat”, he said meeting your gaze. “No, for that you have the full credit”, you commented smiling softly. His eyes narrowed, “After tonight, we might even have another one”, he casually said. “What?”, you replied blushing. “You heard me”, he said reaching to grab your face with his hand. “If I have to take the brat to work, you’re also suffering the consequences”, he said almost growling. “Yes, Sir”, you said seductively making him smirk, “It’s Corporal to you, brat”.
* * *
It hadn’t even been half a day and Levi was already regretting agreeing to bring Charlotte with him. His eyes narrowed watching his daughter in the courtyard with the 104th cadets. He didn’t have a problem with his daughter meeting the cadets but, what he did have a problem with was the newbie 104th cadets flirting with her. “Stupid shitty glasses”, he thought narrowing his eyes further as Jean, a horse-faced teenager, made Charlotte giggle. Hanji had, as per usual, bust into his office with news of some sort of experiment or another. But had promptly stopped when she laid eyes on Charlotte. “Is this little Charlotte I see!”, she had screamed in delight. Hanji was a regular at his house and knew Charlotte quite well. She had begged Levi to let her give Charlotte a tour of the facilities. At the time, he had been half thankful, since he still had half a mountain of paperwork to get through and Charlotte wasn’t making it any easier with her whining and asking when he would be done so that the both of them could go exploring. He trusted Hanji, but looking at things now, that had been a big mistake.
His eyes opened like plates. “Fuck. No.”, he thought having enough of the little show outside. He got up immediately from his desk chair. Eren had touched her. Moronic, hot-headed, titan-shifting Eren, had dared touch her.
Levi wasn’t an unreasonable man. He was praised for keeping his impulses in control. In fact, if anything, he was more the type to step back and assess before acting. But, all of that was thrown out the window when it came to his daughter. No one touched his daughter. Especially with dirty, filthy crummy hands like Eren’s. He stopped his way to the entrance of the courtyard. “Cadets!”, he screamed pissed off. The little group at the centre immediately turned to look at their superior. Levi’s eyes met Charlotte’s, she wasn’t happy and shot him half a glare. When the rest of the group realise it was the Corporal calling them, they all ran to stand in attention. “Heichou”, they said more or less in unison standing straight. Charlotte, on the other hand, leisurely made her way towards the line of cadets and Levi. Levi’s eyes fixated on her, narrowing in anger at her insubordination.
Of course, this did not escape the boys that had been flirting with her attention. Eren looked conflicted between Charlotte and Levi. Jean was biting his lip trying to think of what to say. Reiner’s brow was sweating unsure of what to do and so on and so forth.
“Captain!”, it was Eren who spoke first. Levi tore his eyes off Charlotte to look at him, his steel eyes warning him off wanting to cut his head off. “Charlotte is new”, he said less confidently mirroring Reiner’s sweating. Levi’s right eyebrow cocked up. “We’ll make sure she knows how to greet her superiors properly”, he said closing his eyes and lowering his head as a form of apology. “He”, Levi said in dark amusement. At least one of them had the balls to try to shield that stupid brat of his. Eren opened one eye and sneaked a peek at the Corporal. Levi looked even more annoyed. “Yes Corporal!”, this time it was Jean three persons down. It was his turn to be glared at. “Please forgive her!”, he pleaded also lowering his head. Levi felt red hot anger curing through his veins.
“So, you lot think you know how to handle my daughter better than me?”, Levi said with molten furry. Eren and Jean instantly raised their head in shock. All of the six in the group were shocked. Daughter. Charlotte was the Corporal's daughter.
“Dad!”, came a whine from Charlotte. Levi’s lips became a straight line, “My office”, he managed to say with a still controlled tone. “But-”, she tried, “Now!”, he emphasised louder. She pouted crossing her arms in front of her chest, “Dad stop”, she tried once again. His glare intensified, his eyes turning to look at the still processing cadets in front of him. “Since you all seem so eager to speak on her behalf”, Levi said calling back the attention of the boys, “you can all take her punishment too”, he glared at the line, “100 laps and stable duty for 2 weeks”, he called out waving a hand to dismiss them. Groaning they all made their way back to the courtyard to start laps.
“Charlotte”, he said turning to see his daughter once again. Oh, she was in for it. He never called her that. “We’re leaving”, he called grabbing her forearm and dragging her out of the buildings.
* * *
“Hey!”, you called out hearing your husband and daughter come in through the front door. “How was today?”, you asked moving to the living room to greet them. They both looked angry. “Oh God”, you thought approaching them. “Fine”, Levi said walking past you to reach sit on the couch. “Right”, you thought turning to look at him. “Why the long face?”, you questioned earning you a glare. “Ask her”, he responded pointing at Charlotte, who was still pouting. “Me?!”, she dramatically argued. His eyes narrowed. “What is going on?”, you asked a little lost. “I’ll tell you!”, Charlotte volunteered, “Dad went crazy”, she informed making you frown. Crazy?
“The military is not a flirting patch”, he answered rudely making Charlotte’s cheek colour. Your eyebrow shot up at her reaction. “I wasn’t flirting!”, she defended whilst flustered. You turned to look at your husband who was by then already staring at you with a “see” face. “Levi”, you said walking so that you stood in front of his knees. “What did you do?”, you asked crouching so that you could meet his gaze. “Nothing”, he said turning away. “L-evi”, you said softly. “If those brats have the balls to touch my daughter then they can have the balls to demonstrate their endurance and cleaning skills”, he said, not a single bit sorry. You sighed, turning your head slightly to look at your daughter. “Charlotte, give us a minute”, you said smiling softly at her. She frowned softly but complied and ran upstairs.
Sighing again you hung your head. “Levi”, you said your tone a little stern. He did not answer opting to look elsewhere as you looked up to his face. “You can’t do stuff like that”, you said placing both your hands on each of his knees. His eyes still didn’t meet yours. “Charlotte is not a child”, you said gripping his knees. To this he turns to look down at you his eyes dipped in disapproval, “She will always be my child”, he said catching you by surprise. That was so uncharacteristically of him. “You should have seen how they were looking at her”, he said in disgust, “They got what they deserved, tch”, he said returning his eyes elsewhere. You stifled a chuckle.
You had only seen him like this once and it had been back when you were dating and someone dared ask you out. Levi had had a field day with them.
“Levi”, you called out even softer than before. He looked at you, his eyes now softer with a hint of sadness and anger. “You can’t treat Charlotte like that”, you said drawing circles on his knees. He sighed, his shoulder’s relaxing a bit. “I know”, he said in defeat. One of your hands moved upwards to hold his cheek. His face shifting to put its weight on your palm. “It’s just-”, he started thinking of the best way to describe the feeling, “hard”, he settled on. “I know”, you said empathising with him. He sighed again, moving his face so that his lips were the ones on your palm now. He kissed it before getting up. “Are you going to talk to her?”, you asked watching him disappear further into the house. “Something like that”, he said underneath his breath making you chuckle.
* * *
*knock, knock*
Two knocked protruded from her room’s door. Charlotte looked up from her bed, fresh tears still falling down her cheeks. She didn’t answer, not really in the mood to see you or Levi, especially Levi. “Stupid dad”, she thought burring her face on the pillow.
The door creaked open, allowing Levi to walk inside the room. “Brat”, he called out from the foot of the bed. Charlotte didn’t even shift. He sighed sitting down on the corner by her feet, “Brat”, he tried again. Charlotte simply buried herself deeper in the pillow. She didn’t want her father to watch her cry. “Charlotte”, he said softly placing a hand on her leg. “Hmm”, he heard her muttered from her pillow. “Common, let’s have a talk”, he said tapping her leg. She sighed emerging from the pillow and turning to look at him. His heart twisted when he caught her still watery eyes. “What is it?”, she said quietly. “I’m your dad”, he informed making her eyebrows knit. “Yeah?”, she said quizzically. Levi sighed once more, completely defeated, “even when you’re old like me, you will always be my brat”, he said looking down at her bedsheets. This made Charlotte giggle. “I know”, she said this time placing her hand on his leg. “You’ll always be my dad”, she echoed making the corner of Levi’s mouth tug upwards. “Always”, he answered looking at her with a smile. To his surprise, Charlotte threw herself at him hugging him. Levi eagerly hugged her back.
“This doesn’t mean you can get out of 5 a.m. training tomorrow”, he said making her push him so that he was at arm’s length. “Training?”, she repeated confused. “What? You thought I would back away from a promise?”, he asked rhetorically feigning offence. Charlotte beamed, “Really? You mean it?!”, she asked bouncing. “Yeah, yeah”, he said ruffling her hair, “Be ready at 4:30 sharp”, he said getting up from her bed, “If you’re late, I’ll make you run laps”, he said closing the door of her bedroom.
And I'm petrified of being alone, now | The Aftermath
House or Home?
It’s been about a year or so and they're finally looking at moving in together, properly this time, but Mouse is stubborn and Matty’s… Matty.
“I hate it.”
Matty all but deflated at the three words, eyes sweeping over to where the estate agent was still stood in the kitchen doorway to the pretty four bedroom house they’d found in South Hampstead.
In her defence, she still had that godawful smile plastered across her face, as though the entire statement bothered her none, but her eyes told a different story. They were screaming.
Matty couldn’t blame her, not when this was the eighth house Mouse had turned down this week alone. And it was only fucking Tuesday.
“Squeaks, babe.” Matty quietly attempted, mouth opening once more in an effort to get the woman to see sense. The house had everything they were looking for, it was more than perfect and how could it not be with an actual garden that Teddy could run rampant in and a sodding wine cellar to boot.
But she cut him off, spinning around on her heel to shake her head at the agent in a silent apology. “Sorry. It’s just not gonna work.” It was all that was said before she took off, leaving Matty standing there awkwardly with the estate agent, hands tucked in his back pockets like a kid meeting their mum’s new boyfriend for the first time.
The woman, lovely girl named Mila, slumped slightly but kept up the act, pretending like all was fine and dandy, probably more than used to dealing with shit like this.
“Sorry love, it’s just a big decision. You know?” Matty tried to soothe, lips pulling into a thin smile made mostly of regret. And it was exactly that– a big decision.
It had been just over a year since that whole fallout had happened with the media and the sudden silence between them. And shit had cropped up every now and again after it; his management team had been a fucking nightmare to coerce and convincing themselves that this thing that they had was worth trying for had been daunting. But they’d put it all behind them in the end, they’d moved on.
And now here they were, buying a house. A home. Because Teds was getting bigger and bigger by the day, enough so that he now had a proper big boy bed and could ride a bike that took up a chunk of his bedroom. But also because Matty suddenly had a shit ton of crap to relocate since he’d moved out of and sold his London gaff, having slowly slunk his way into the flat he’d come to think of as home.
All in all, Mouse’s was simply running out of room to hold them all.
Mila waved his apology off though with a single hand gesture, tucking the ipad she constantly held under her right arm. “It’s fine, I get it. Every client’s different.” She told him easily enough, but her smile was still so weary when she looked back at him, “I’ll get to looking for a couple more properties for you.”
Matty nodded, but let his eyes flit back over to the antique cabinets he could so easily picture Teds hiding in whilst they played a round of hide-and-seek, as well as the large kitchen island that they could all use for big get-togethers or family dinners. He gave a halfhearted sigh before allowing himself to take a small step back and follow Mila when she started to turn. “‘Spose this happens all the time then?” He asked her, hoping to fill the quiet walk from the kitchen to the front door.
There was a small pause, and then, “Sure.”
Wincing at that, Matty was more than a little thankful to be walking a step behind the woman, especially when they stepped out the front door onto a porch that screamed American Dream and spotted Mouse propped up against the Jeep’s passenger door.
He tried to give Mila another polite smile when she told him that this had been the last viewing she would have for them for a little while and that she’d soon be in touch. Matty just shook her hand, thanking her again for her time, before they parted ways and he was walking back on over to the car.
He slid into his seat, hearing Squeaks follow, and didn’t say a word as he backed out of the paved driveway, admiring the stonework that lined the verdant grass and the fenced gate as they drove out of it. With one final glance at the house in the rearview mirror, he reached out to switch the radio on, the AC quickly following.
It was just as he made a left turn at the end of the quaint street that Matty heard a small intake of breath, he waited for the eventual…
“It just didn’t feel right.”
Even with the slight frustration he felt, Matty licked at his lower lip and looked right to hide the slight smile he wore. He hummed softly over the low buzz of the speakers, “You’ve said that about the last sixteen, baby.”
Mouse let go of a harsh breath and Matty felt his grin grow. “Well, then I guess the last sixteen didn’t feel right!” She retorted and threw her hands up in exasperation before crossing them over her chest, fingers moving to toy with the elbow of her sleeve. “I’ll know it when I see it, okay?”
Matty flicked an amused brow in the direction of the passenger seat and received a scornful glare for it in return, so he merely resorted to surrendering, glancing back out at the empty road ahead. “Okay.”
They stayed in a quiet little bubble the whole drive back to the flat. Matty’s mind stuck on the house they’d just viewed, on the long winding staircase, the extra bedrooms it offered, that waterfall shower. By his standards, it would’ve been perfect. It should have been.
It took a little wrangling but he did eventually manage to find a space to park on the overflowing sidestreet that their flat resided on when they finally got home, but it was at that point that Squeak’s phone rang. She moved on autopilot after answering it, unbuckling her seatbelt swiftly whilst Matty turned the car off and locked up.
She had a slight crease between her brow as they made their way up the few short steps which led to the front door and tugged a hand through her hair just as he worked the key into the worn gold lock.
“Yeah, I can do that. Ah, just–” Matty listened to her pause in the entryway and glanced back, waiting by the radiator for her to shoot a quick glance his way so that he could ask a silent question with just a single look. She mouthed Teddy’s name before she was speaking into the phone again, only proving to puzzle Matty further. “Alright, can you hang on just a sec? Alright, thanks.”
Matty watched closely as she pressed the phone to her chest to muffle any sound the speaker might pick up and chewed on her lower lip. “What’s happened?”
Mouse raked her hand through her hair again and blew out a breath, “Teds has hit his head at school, they say he’s fine but the bumps come up quick. Need him to be picked up.”
It was immediate the way Matty’s pulse quickened at the implication of Teddy having been hurt and so he was pretty hasty as he moved to grab the keys he’d just set down on the hallway’s side, already gravitating towards the door before Mouse could even utter another word. “I can be there in ten minutes, just let them know it’ll be me coming, yeah?”
A year ago, Squeaks would’ve reeled a bit at the entire situation, what with Matty taking charge on matters where her son was concerned and on her not being the one to drop everything just to go and pick him up, but now she barely batted an eye. Instead, Matty watched on as she nodded, face full of relief as she stepped forward to press a chaste kiss to his cheek before she was speaking into the phone again, demanding to know what had gone down.
Matty slipped back out the front door with a slight rattle, his typical gait quickening as he hurried on over to the car, jumping in and starting it up once more before he could even think to worry about finding a better parking space than this when they eventually got back. Mind focused solely on getting to Teddy.
In the time Matty had known the kid, Teddy had only gotten sick twice. The first time had been this little bug, it had given him a bad belly and a bit of a cough but hadn’t affected him all that much. Still, Matty had fretted all the same, nursed him back to health and had barely left his side, even if that had meant listening to the same episode of Blue’s Clues on repeat for three days straight. The second though, that had been a lot more frightening.
Winter had rolled its way back around as it tended to do and the usual flu had taken its hold. Matty himself had picked something up off of one of their roadies during the promotional tour they’d been doing for the latest album in Europe. The tour had only lasted a couple of weeks, but he’d still been jumping back and forth between this city and that just so that he could see Teds and Squeaks as often as possible. But that in itself had also meant that Teddy had ended up catching the same bout of flu, too.
Matty had been beside himself when he’d first heard, guilty for the fact that he’d had the precious little gremlin sniffling down the phone on their next call. But Mouse had just laughed and shook her head at him, promising that Teds would be as right as rain soon enough. But not even she could have prepared for the way the kid had taken a sharp turn overnight.
Jamie had shaken Matty awake at four am, not long after they’d managed to make it to Sheffield and hunker down for the night in some swanky hotel. He’d been bleary eyed and still recovering from the relentless cough that had been wreaking havoc on his lungs for the past week when he’d rolled over to find his manager's nervous face staring down at him.
Teddy’s fever has spiked, he’d said.
It had been a freight train of emotions after that. Jamie had somehow managed to score him a flight down from Manchester to London in less than a half an hour. But by that point Matty had already been in the back of a cab, trembling hands texting with Adi whilst the woman had updated him on every single thing that had occurred back home.
Seemed that Teddy’s temperature had risen so quickly, having jumped from a steady 38 to 42 in less than an hour, which had prompted the most agonising hospital trip of Matty’s entire life. And that was including each time he’d fucked up and been wheeled there himself.
It had taken him just over two hours to get down to them, so by that point Teddy had only just been properly seen and Mouse was in silent hysterics. Adi had ordered Finn to come pick him up from the airport, but back then the two of them had still been in this awkward sort of stalemate and so neither had spoken a word apart from when the other man had finally attempted to calm Matty’s anxious tapping.
“He’ll be okay.” It was all that he had said, but Matty had found himself nodding along in quiet agreement all the same whilst he’d rattled his phone against his knee, ready to jump out of the car at a second's notice.
Driving over to collect the kid from school now, Matty felt that same agitation. The need to just be there, to see for himself that Teddy was okay. It was all that he could do to not hightail it over and fuck every traffic law he could somewhat remember just to ebb the sinking feeling that had wormed its way into his gut.
He did eventually manage to get there, making it in just under ten minutes after he’d accidentally ran a red and parked in a teacher's bay outside.
The receptionist startled a tad at his sudden appearance, eyes probably as big as saucers and darting about the room in hopes to find Teds stood waiting there for him. But the kid was nowhere to be seen, and so Matty crossed the room to speak to her.
“Hi, here to collect Teddy? You rang, said something about him hitting his head?”
Matty had dropped Teddy to and from school more times than he could count, but collecting him from the office? That was something he’d never done before. Never even thought about, actually. And so he was fucking unsure on what the fuck kind of etiquette these people were supposed to use here. Did she need his ID, his passport? A picture of him and Teddy ice skating?
“Oh! Okay then, I’ll just fetch him for you. If you could sign him out here for me?” She pointed towards a clipboard and pen sat just off to the side and then smiled one last time before she wandered away.
Matty blinked and watched her slip out a side door. Was that it?
All he had to do was just sign the kid out?
Matty released a heavy breath and shook his head at the thought, figuring it best to just do as was expected and have a word about it with Squeaks later on, maybe it was just something he was missing.
As it happened, he’d just finished scrawling down the last of his name when the door inside the office squeaked open causing him to jolt the y in Healy as his head snapped up.
It was as though all the tension he’d ever felt seeped out of him in that very moment. Years of stress from fucking performing, of trying to get through his own stupid exams back at school, and maybe even the trouble of having dealt with his parents and their shitty divorce. All of it just vanished when he looked over to find Teddy already grinning at him with his little book bag slung over his shoulder and a Spidey plaster stuck to the side of his eyebrow.
“Matty!” Teddy all but squealed as the kid darted away from the receptionist to barrel headfirst into his legs. Matty felt his heart give out a little at the sight of the tyke, obviously not as traumatised as he’d been expecting him to be.
“Alright, monster?” He replied softly, bending down a tad to scoop Teddy up into his arms, eyes flickering over every inch of his face just to be certain he wasn't hiding any other injuries. “Heard you had a bit of a tumble.”
Teddy nodded, almost excitedly, and Matty fought not to shake his head, utterly bewildered by the fact that the kid wasn't more phased. He almost wanted to scream, in truth. This amount of worrying wasn’t typical, alright? And he was fucking getting up there in age! All the stupid shit he’d managed to achieve during his livelier years and the life choices he’d made added up in the end, didn’t they? So it was an honest to God miracle that he hadn’t suffered a sodding aneurysm on the way over here, or something of the sort.
“Just a little fall apparently.” Matty heard someone say and he looked up only to be reminded of the fact that the receptionist was still standing there, watching. She gifted him a sweet smile, eyes caught on the way Teddy clung to his neck and the way he appeared to cling back. “There’s an accident report in his bag for you to look at, they go home with all the little ones. The nurse said it wasn’t anything too big and that he should be fine, but it’s best to keep an eye on these things so if anything out of the ordinary does happen it’s best to take him to the local A&E.”
Matty felt his mouth go dry at the very implication and so he wet his lower lip just before he exhaled a little shakily. “Right,” He swallowed thickly, hand smoothing over a riot of curls and pausing on the small bump he felt at the top of Teddy’s head. “And the plaster?”
The woman blinked and weirdly Matty felt a little caught out, as though he was suddenly this afternoon's entertainment. He wondered briefly if she knew just who he was.
“That’ll have been jotted down on the report too, but from what I heard it was just a little cut above the brow.” The receptionist answered him, extending an arm out to pat Teddy’s back before she stepped away again, “You really were brave today, Teddy.”
The kid puffed up at that, smiling proudly, but his eyes remained glued on Matty and so he returned the bright grin, kissing the side of Teddy’s head before he hitched him up further on his hip. “No stitches then?”
“Tiniest of scratches.” The woman assured him around a wide smile as she shook her head and waved his worries off.
Matty dipped his head in a slight nod, looking down at Teddy once more. “Anything else I need to do then, or?” He asked, letting that or drag out as he inched closer towards the door he’d previously barreled through.
“You should be good to go.” She told him, eyes still lingering. “It was nice to meet you though!”
“Yeah,” Matty replied as he struggled with the door, “you too.”
By the time the pair of them made it back outside and into the car Teddy was keeping up a constant babble, explaining (but not actually) just how he’d fallen and hit his head. From what Matty could make out it was when he was running to escape the fishmen? And so he could only guess that him and his mates had been playing a weird round of a tag at breaktime and Teddy had taken a plunge into the wrong kind of waters.
“You’re sure you’re okay though, mate?” Matty asked him once they were about a minute or two away from the flat and Teddy’s ramblings had died out a tad. He glanced in the rear mirror to find Teds picking at the plaster above his brow.
“Uhuh.” Was the answer he received in turn and it was enough to dislodge the last of that worry that had been eating away at his chest.
Matty figured then was as good a time as any to try and talk with him a little. The whole drive back from viewing that house, before they’d gotten the scare from the school, he’d been thinking and thinking. Enough to have concocted the beginnings of a small plan.
“Remember how we was talking about looking for a new house, Teds?”
Matty’s thumbs tapped at the top of the steering wheel as he waited for a reply, oddly grateful for the small queue of traffic that sat up ahead. It would give them a bit more time.
“Yeah, you said a garden!” Teddy answered him and Matty figured he seemed excited enough about it all when the toe of the kid’s school shoe kicked the back of his chair. “That could mean a dog, right? Taylor has a dog!”
Matty fought back a laugh, the lad’s only just performed a stunt that’s gone tits up and landed him with a wound to the head but he’s more worried over when or if they’ll be getting a dog. Though, to be fair to him, a dog did sound nice. He could picture one now, out there on that grassy patch of land behind that particular house rolling about with Teddy.
“That’s cool, mate. But I was just wondering what you thought about it all. A new house could mean a bigger bedroom for you, you know? Could have a couple sleepovers maybe, with a few of your friends from school.”
Matty didn’t have to glance back to know that Teddy’s eyes had shot open wide, he heard it all in that delighted little gasp he made. He chuckled.
“And remember my old house? How we used to make pancakes in the kitchen whenever you and mum would stay over?” Matty reminded him, eyes flicking up into the mirror to watch Teds nod at him, “Reckon we could do that again in the new house ‘cause it’d be a lot bigger, means we could all fit in there. Could even do your homework whilst we cooked in the evenings. How’s that sound?”
“Don’t like homework though.”
Matty laughed as the traffic started to pick up again, he moved to shift into gear. “Me neither, little man. But you’re a whole lot smarter than me so I reckon if we roped mum into helping too it’d all be done a lot quicker. And we could do that in the new house, don’t you reckon?”
“Yeah, and then I could get my Spidey walls!” Teddy exclaimed, bouncing in his carseat now, enough so that Matty was honestly a little fretful that he’d fall out of the thing.
“You remembered that one, hey?”
“You promised, ‘member!” Teddy shot back at him just as Matty turned onto their street, shoulders slumping in relief when he found that there was a space free a little further down.
“Yeah, I do, mate. Swear I haven’t forgotten.” He reassured and smiled to himself as he parked up and continued to listen to the dreams Teddy had for his future bedroom. And fuck anyone who thought he wouldn’t make them happen.
The two of them walked down the street hand in hand once Matty had pulled the monster free from his homemade rocking chair– and made sure that the thing was as secure as it should be. Teddy was happy to talk away, squealing when he caught sight of next door’s tabby cat and then bouncing in Matty arms when he had just about managed to scoop the kid up before Teds had gone bounding into the road to follow the skittish thing.
By the time they’d made it in through the front door, Matty was sure he couldn’t take much more after the emotional rollercoaster he’d been on most of the day.
“Squeaks?” He called out whilst he coaxed Teddy into kicking off his shoes and jacket, only just managing to peel the bookbag off the kid when Mouse came into view.
“Mama! Look at my Spidey sticker!” Teds called out as he tumbled on over to the woman, pointing to his head. In truth, it was a mystery how he didn’t take another tumble then and there, what with the way he was skidding about all over the floors.
Matty let go of a weighted sigh and took to shucking off his own shit, dropping his boots onto the shoe stand before he hung up his jacket beside Teddy’s. When he stood back on his feet Teds had already hurried off into the living room, happy to be home from school again it seemed and not caring about the grape sized lump protruding from the side of his head.
Mouse quirked a brow at him when he stepped nearer, hiding her amused smile at his wary appearance, but still willing to let him wrap his arms around her waist and his head fall against her neck. “Okay, lovely?” She murmured into his hair and Matty felt himself nod slightly.
“Shattered.”
“Life of having kids, babe.” Squeaks chuckled, running a hand through his curls before resting it on the nape of his neck, “Thank you for going to get him.”
Matty pulled away to frown down at her, brow pinched. “Don’t thank me, you muppet. It’s weird.”
She simply resorted to snorting at the reply he’d given and then smiled, “I just appreciate it, is all. That alright with you?”
Rolling his eyes, Matty pinched her side before he slipped away. “Nope. But you can make it up to me by making dinner?”
He received a halfhearted scowl at the attempt but her smile was warm and soft and everything he loved, so he didn’t worry too much as he went to join Teddy on the settee.
Apparently, he hadn’t really needed to ask about dinner because it seemed as though Mouse had already had the foresight to have gotten a start on it when he’d been gone. So after he’d made sure that Teds was sweet and honed into his show, he’d peeled himself off the comfy cushions and headed into the kitchen to help out.
Cooking together was something Matty had always loved. In the early days, he’d just been content to sit there and watch her work. But now he enjoyed helping out, even if it meant being bossed about or bumping into one another in the too small space.
It was just when they brushed against one another again, as she bent down to open the oven door that he only just narrowly missed toppling over the side of, that Matty could no longer hold his tongue on the subject.
“This place feels like it’s getting smaller and smaller by the day.”
His words were merely met by a low hum whilst Squeaks continued to check on the food. Matty spared another halfhearted glance around the cramped kitchen, at the small wooden table and the tiny fridge tucked up under the counter. Then at the washing machine that was on its last legs and the pile of pots and pans they had no space for.
“That house we saw was massive, kitchen was sort of like one of those you’d find in a catalogue, don’t you think?” He pressed a little further, tongue toying with the back of his front teeth as he struggled not to peer back over at her to witness her reaction. “Wouldn’t be bumping into one another all the time if we chose something like that.” He chuckled, but the sound of it was quickly cut short by the slam of the oven door.
“What, so you don’t like bumping into me anymore?” Mouse asked and Matty shifted to find her standing there by the hob, tea towel fisted in the hand she held at her hip. “‘Cause I do. I like coming home to you, to us spending time with each other, even if it’s in silence. I enjoy brushing past you in the kitchen and in the hallway, and even in the bathroom when you claim you have to brush your teeth the very second I do!”
Matty blinked.
“I love this flat, Matty. I love the fact that the rent’s cheap! That we’re chummy with the landlord and the neighbours aren’t half bad. That I can count on them to watch Teddy if something ever did happen!” Mouse exclaimed, staring back at him with those big eyes of hers, chest almost heaving.
“Teddy’s first steps were taken here!” She continued on, as though it had just slowly been building up inside her and had suddenly found its chance to blow. She paused, only to point up at the ceiling to where a splodgy patch of something hung above them, “See that stain? That’s from when Teds had his first bowl of bolognese. And that chip in the tile right there? That’s from when you dropped that planter you got me after you’d come home from tour!”
Matty stared down at the chip now, noting that it wasn’t the only imperfection in the mosaic of tiles, but one that he could remember making as clear as day.
His silence must have lingered on too long though because Mouse then took his wrist and led him out of the kitchen, she stopped short to point at the plethora of guitars that crowded a corner of the living room. “And how about that mark on the wall? The one made when Ross and George came over for Halloween and all those guitars went toppling over as they chased after Teds.”
Teddy was watching them now, eyes having wandered away from the tele set and over to where Squeaks gripped his hand a little tighter to tug him along behind her and into the hallway.
She paused by the door to Teddy’s room and Matty already knew what was coming.
“You told me you loved me here.” She murmured, stealing the breath right out of his lungs, before she then turned to spare a glance at the front door. “And we can’t forget that door.”
Matty breathed out a faint chuckle, his startled gaze moving to find hers in the dimly lit hall, only her eyes were glassy and darting back and forth between his own, almost pleadingly.
“I know it’s too small. And I know we can’t stay here forever. But it’s home. It’s a place made up of all my best memories, Matty.”
He couldn’t think of anything to say to that. Because suddenly he realised that this was why she had claimed that she had hated every house that they had gone to look at. Why she had been so adamant on getting it right, on finding the right one. Why she had made up excuse after excuse to get out of viewings, to turn each one of them down.
Matty reached over to cradle her face before he pulled her in close, hands falling to hold her. He smiled softly when he caught a flash of movement just out of the corner of his eye. It was barely a gesture, let alone a nod of his head, but Teddy knew what it meant all the same and bolted over from where he’d been standing in the doorway of the living room to join them.
Matty understood then. That the flat was a part of them. But moving didn’t have to mean giving all their memories up. It could simply mean creating new ones, better ones. He only hoped that he could somehow convince Mouse of that. Because he knew that she wanted this too, deep down, she wanted a place that could be all of theirs, that they could mould and shift and shape into their own. But she was just so afraid to let go of the past, to take that next step, to leave the memories they’d made here together behind.
But he would show her it would all be fine. Somehow.
So with that thought, Matty went and did the one thing he knew would have to work.
A week passed after that emotional afternoon and things mostly settled. Matty hadn’t brought up another thing about house hunting or viewing talks with Mila, and so he could only guess that Mouse had been somewhat lulled into the sense of thinking that that had been the end of it all.
But then they were on their way back from Hann and Carly’s the next Wednesday, they’d had lunch and talked music, and Squeaks had been none the wiser when Matty had taken the Jeep down a wrong turn.
It was only when they’d pulled onto the street and the gravel beneath the tyres had levelled and softened out that Mouse had perked up a little in her seat. Her brow was pinched when she finally turned to face him, eyes darting around, “Think you missed an exit back there.”
Matty didn’t give her reply as he scanned the street for that familiar number, the weight of an unknown pair of keys sitting heavily in his right trouser pocket.
“Matty, do you even know where we are?” Mouse wondered again before she started messing about with the navigation system on the console. But Matty didn’t pay it much mind, continued to roll the car further and further down the street until they reached that fenced gate he’d exited through the last time they were here. “Matty?”
He came to a slow halt and switched the engine off, shooting her a sly smirk before he slipped out the side door.
“Matty!” Mouse called after him in a hiss, but Matty was already jogging up the few short steps to that painted white porch, a tiny set of keys already warming his palm. “Matty, what the fuck are you doing? You wanna get done for breaking and entering?”
Matty snorted softly to himself whilst he slotted the key into the lock and silently thanked the lovely Mila, reminding himself to get the girl a proper thank you gift if this all worked out the way he was hoping.
Squeaks called out to him one more time as he stepped over the threshold, a smile dawning on his face as he paused to wait for her to join him.
“Matty–” She was a tad bit out of breath but mostly exasperated by the time her fingers caught on the hem of his sleeve, but then she jolted beside him not a second later. He waited, peered over at her to watch her take in the familiar surroundings and smiled when the skin between her brows ultimately furrowed. “Why are we here, Matty? Isn’t this the last house we saw?”
Grinning, Matty linked his fingers through hers and gently lured her nearer. “Doesn’t hurt to take a second look around, does it?”
Mouse must have been more than a little perplexed by the whole ordeal because she didn’t fight him on the matter when he started to move them further inside— and in truth, he was really fucking thankful for that fact because he figured getting her inside would be the hardest task. And yet here they were.
The hallway back at the flat was about the same size as a twin bed and morphed into a narrow corridor which led onto the two bedrooms and the singular bathroom it had to offer. Here though, the entryway was wide and spacious. The current owners had a bench lined up on one wall where a pair of tall windows perched either side of the front door and the wooden floorboards that ran throughout the whole house homed a large vintage rug, which sat beneath a table in the centre of the room and held a rather bright bouquet.
Matty’s eyes stilled on the wide set of stairs though sat just behind the many flowerheads. “Couldn’t you picture Teds running about in here? Like, him storming in after school with all his mates behind him.” He wondered aloud, smiling as he took another step further inside. “And those stairs, I could see us taking Christmas photos there– like mum used to force me into doing back when I was a kid.”
He hadn't actually expected a reply and so he had to dampen his grin when she chuckled sweetly in return, “What, the three of us all decked out in matching jumpers?”
“Or pjs.” Matty countered before he led her a little further away, pointing out the large fireplace which they could use in the colder months and the downstairs loo that he could see becoming a lifesaver as Teddy grew older. “And look at this dining room, baby! We could have all the guys over at once in here, Adi and your mum too! Sunday roasts round ours, hey? Especially once the rest of the boys have littluns of their own.”
She didn’t say much to that but her eyes were scanning, surveying even, and so Matty took that as a win and together they moved further forward into the famous kitchen. The very room she had claimed she hated the entire house in.
They paused by the entrance and Matty let himself lean against the door’s wooden beam, Squeak’s hand still holding his. Those antique cabinets looked the same as they had done a week prior, but the wash of colour seemed to illuminate under the setting sun that peered in through the old french doors.
“Could move about in here so freely.” Matty heard himself tease, voice soft though in hopes to not to break up the gentle moment. “Picture it. Making you pancakes on Mother’s day and helping Teds with his school work on the countertop there whilst we cook.”
Matty was surprised when Mouse was the one to shuffle on over towards the kitchen’s island, eyes mapping the vibrant fruit bowl and the cast-iron sink.
He watched on as her gaze was drawn towards the back doors, to where another patio stretched far out on the other side. Slowly, he guided her closer to them, letting her get a feel for it all before he took the handle and opened them up, letting the light spring breeze flutter through.
“Can you see it? A couple kids filling up the garden. Us standing here, or looking out that window there, to see Teddy laugh and smile while he darts about back and forth with a football or a kite.” Matty chuckled, already picturing it coming to life before his eyes, replacing the firepit in the back with a tyre swing and adding in a grill for him to man come summertime. “Could even get him a dog.”
Mouse shook her head even as they shared a smile.
“I know what you’re doing.”
Matty dragged his tongue across his teeth in hopes that it would dim the strength of his already too big grin. “And what’s that?”
“This, I get it.” Mouse replied, then she shrugged a single shoulder, “But it doesn’t change anything. The flats perfect for now, maybe soon we can look again and I might change my mind.”
“You’re right stubborn you know that?” Matty acknowledged, because he’d hoped that by doing this, just them wandering through the empty property, that she might have been able to see what he saw. But still, he smiled down at her.
She widened her eyes mockingly in retort to that statement, forever used to hearing it. “Thought you’d’ve figured it out by now, rockstar.”
Matty simply hummed, feeling the slight breeze settle around them, rattling the metal wind chime which hung from one of the outside beams. He casted his sights out across the long patch of grass laid out before them and took a deep breath, mouth twitching ever so slightly.
“You know, someday we’ll have to start making new memories.” He mentioned, tucking a hand into his jacket pocket.
“I know.”
It was hard not to fall apart then, especially when her eyes trailed over to meet his nervous smile. She tilted her head at him, confused. And Matty figured he just had to get it over with before his legs soon gave out.
“So why not some place like this?” He wondered, fingers tightening around the hand he still held in his as he rocked back and settled down on one knee.
She didn’t dare move. Staring down at him and the pretty red box he now held, so still Matty wasn’t even sure that she was breathing.
“Are you serious?”
A chuckle escaped him at the ask and it was surprising because it sounded so genuine, even with the way his hand currently shook. “I reckon we could make a couple nice memories in a place like this. So, you just gonna let me kneel here or will you marry me?”
Mouse tried to keep the smile from off her face, eyes sparkling as she stared back at him, but in the end the battle was lost and Matty ended up mimicking the strength of it.
“Is that a yes then?”
She laughed, bright and loud, then tugged him up to wrap her arms around him. When she finally pulled away her eyes were wet but he didn’t think he’d ever witnessed her happier.
“Of course it is, you idiot.” She sniffed, capturing his jaw between her palms, and she stared at him so earnestly that it made Matty feel so utterly seen. “But it really does need a new lick of paint.”
Squeaks must’ve seen the evident confusion that crossed his face right then because she chuckled and gestured her head over towards the back door. “The house. If we’re planning on living here then I want it to feel like ours.”
At the realisation Matty laughed in disbelief and dipped down to rest his forehead against her own.
“I think I can manage that.”
“You better.” She quipped, pulling him in for a slow kiss before she was giggling to herself. Her eyes were bright and alive even as she narrowed them menacingly at him and prodded at his chest with a finger, “But don’t pull anything like this ever again, you hear?”
“What, propose?”
She rolled her eyes at the question but that smile of hers was relentless.
Summary: She’s just trying to get by, really. What with being a single parent to her four year old son whilst simultaneously trying to kick start a successful career as a radio presenter. She’s got everything she’s ever wanted though, friends close by, a mum who’s merely a phone call away, and of course her baby boy. What else is there to wish for? But then, it’s not long before her relatively normal life gets upended and turned on its head, and she’s suddenly forced to deal with situations she’s never even thought to imagine.
What happens when one mention of a certain controversial singer on her show sends a flood of unexpected challenges her way?
Authors Note: This is a long one, it took me a while but hopefully the waits been worth it? EMOTIONS is all I'm going to say.
Warnings: Lots going on- talks of car crashes, alcohol abuse (both in the past) also some previous thoughts on trauma and different coping mechanisms
> Last update: look back here if you'd like!
Masterlist
It takes a second for change to implement itself, though it can take a while longer for its realisation to truly hit.
…
I could hear him.
Bustling his way around my kitchen, singing quietly as he worked on the breakfast he’d promised the night before. Tins clattered, the kettle whistled, and the fridge door rattled closed, all whilst I padded my way towards him, pausing in the entryway to simply take in the sight I’d been gifted.
I grinned over at Teddy, who was currently tiptoeing on the wooden stool I had tucked away for whenever he felt inclined to help me cook, and then at Matty who seemed happy enough with making him giggle whenever he chose to lean in close to sing by his ear.
“Thinking this through… It's like, one,”
“..TWO!” Teddy laughed back when Matty pointed at him, beaming brightly at the sight of the man’s all too amused face.
“Yeah, ‘cause I'm in love with you-”
“I-I-I-I!”
It was something I’d never thought to even picture, let alone see, my son staring up at a man with such adoration and pride. The two of them simply belonging. The whole scene made me ache with a wanting for it to never stop, but even the best of things had to come to an end I supposed.
Matty turned, a smile painting on his features, only to pause when he caught sight of me, watching them from the doorway. He narrowed his eyes, then gave me a sly smile, before he placed the plate he’d been holding down on the counter and shuffled on closer, arms stretching out towards me as he continued to sing along to his own song. I mean, the ego on him.
“… I’m in love with you.”
It was hard going, attempting to dampen the grin that pulled at the corners of my mouth, especially when Matty wrapped his arms around my hips and started to sway us to and fro. He raised his brows up at me, fully expecting me to finish off the song for him, so I rolled my eyes and laughed the final line out, accompanied by a much louder Teddy, “I-I-I-I-I.”
Matty leaned in close to press a quick kiss to the corner of my mouth, his tangled hair tickling my cheek. He chuckled lowly to himself when I wrinkled my nose at the feeling and tried to escape from his hold, but did eventually let me go.
“What are you even making?” I asked the pair of them around a fond smile, crossing the kitchen to ruffle Teddy’s curls and open up the little window there. I sniffed lightly. “Did you end up burning something too?”
Matty rolled his eyes at that and shook his head with a tut, before he moved to pick up his plate once more, sliding past Teddy and I to grab at the toast which had just popped up. “No.”
“Liar.” I laughed with Teddy, picking him up and settling him on my hip whilst Matty turned his back on us to start buttering the bread. “What’s with the big breakfast then anyway? I thought you had to record today.” I asked him, praising Teddy quietly for the way he’d spooned some sugar and two teabags into a pair of matching mugs for us.
“Later on,” Matty answered me in a quiet murmur as I peered over his shoulder to nick a fresh piece of toast. “Oi!”
Grinning around the bite I’d just taken, I was pleasantly surprised to find that it wasn’t completely charred. “Better than the last batch.” I told him honestly and with a wry smirk.
Matty just shook his head at me, but even as he turned back to the task at hand I could see the tiny beginnings of the smile he wore. “Said I could cook.”
With a sarky hum, I could only reply, “Does toast even count as cooking?”
I was simply swatted away with a tea towel in hasty retort and Teddy squealed, wriggling to be let down.
“Okay, okay!” I relented with a laugh of my own before I slid on over to press a grateful kiss to the side of Matty’s neck. “It’s very good, merci mon amour.”
I pulled away with a grin when I felt him tense beneath me, gesturing to Teddy for him to go ahead and grab the milk for us from the fridge whilst I began to pour the hot water into the tea he’d started.
“What are you up to today then?” Matty asked after having cleared his throat, tossing the butter-covered knife into the sink before he looked over at us. He thanked Teddy proudly when the little monster hurried back from dumping the tea bags in the bin to point at the man’s given cup. “Lifesaver!”
Teddy giggled happily.
Matty’s question had me chewing on the inside of my cheek as I went about lifting Teddy into his usual seat at the kitchen table and laying a plate in front of him. I smoothed down his tousled hair and didn’t quite look in Matty’s direction when I finally said, “You know, the usual… Quick trip to the shops, phone mum, speak to Finn, maybe pop into the park. I hear they’ve put in this new little greenhouse by the pond, you know, just across the bridge?”
I’d thrown it in there, hoping that he might just brush over it. But then Matty didn’t offer me an answer of any kind, so with nothing else to occupy myself with I slowly peered over to where he still stood, propped up against the kitchen counter.
He was staring down at the bowl of fruit he’d prepped sometime earlier, almost as though the grapes had suddenly grown legs and the banana pieces had turned purple. I sighed quietly to myself and felt my shoulders drop an inch before crouching down to whisper in Teddy’s ear, “Go turn on the tele for me, yeah? We can eat on the sofa today.”
Teddy’s entire face lit up at the very prospect and was so eager in his haste to hurry into the living room that he almost toppled out of his chair. I chuckled in fond exasperation, helping him down and handing him his plate with a quiet caution before allowing him to run off.
It was then that I turned my attention back to the main issue at hand.
We hadn’t spoken much of Finn and what had happened back at the studio. I’d given Matty his space after it had all gone down, allowed him the time to mull it over and hopefully forget the words that had been said, but I knew that had mostly been wishful thinking on my part.
Still, I was kicking myself for it now. We’d been good. Things had really been looking up; at work and at home, with Teddy and Matty, and then with Matty and I. Stupidly, I had thought that this might just be something we could have simply plastered over and left to settle, because admitting to the fact that things weren’t alright between two of the most important people in my life just wasn’t something I was ready to face yet.
I’d been selfish in that regard though, it seemed. Because of course Matty had taken the brunt of it all and pretended to shrug it off like it was no skin off of his nose. Leaving me to realise all too late just how much this whole thing had affected him.
“Matty.” I called to him softly before I gently rested my hand on the crook of his arm, testing if I was welcome. When he didn’t immediately shy away from my touch, I slid in behind him so that I could press my forehead to the curve of his back, to where that little dip in between both of his shoulder blades resided.
Thoughtlessly, my fingers trailed over the hem of the jeans he’d thrown on that morning, toying with the two belt loops which sat at the very centre.
We stood there for a long moment in the quiet space of the kitchen, the food going cold but neither one of us really caring. It was only when I felt some of that tension finally ebb in his shoulders that I slowly wound my arms around his middle, smiling slightly when I felt his hands take hold of mine at his front.
“I hate this.” I admitted to him, voice so faint it was muffled by the fabric of his t-shirt. His fingers squeezed my own.
“I know.” He told me after a small pause and I felt him raise his head to gaze out of the small window sat opposite. “I know, Squeaks. Me too.”
I squeezed back.
“I’m sorry we haven’t spoken about it either. That I let it fester. I just wished, hoped even, that you might not linger too much on it, that things would- I don’t know, just end up working out. But I was stupid.”
Matty heaved a weighted breath and I let my eyes slip closed at the motion before he carefully turned in my grasp. He stopped to stare down at me, lifting a hand to tuck a strand of stray hair behind my ear, thumb brushing over a whitened scar I had yet to hide with makeup.
“Don’t. There’s no need.” He murmured to me, though his gaze was focused on the slow movement he’d just made. “Talk to him. He’s your mate, it’d be weird if you didn’t. But, I don’t know. Reckon I just might need some time. That alright?”
I was already nodding before he could even finish his sentence, more than okay with that. “‘Course it is. Though I don’t know much about talking with him, I’m betting on a screaming match. I’m still fuming with how it all went down.”
Matty gifted me a soft chuckle, and although it was hollow he had tried and that was what mattered most to me. It would take time to move past this, I could understand that. “Let him explain first, yeah?”
I frowned, brow pinching with it. “What do you mean? What’s he got to explain?”
He smiled, one of those soft dopey ones of his, the kind he often gave me whenever I’d said something silly or he was humoured by my confusion. “I get it, Mouse.” He sighed quietly, “I don't like how he went about it, it was cheap, shitty even, but he was just looking out for you, babe.”
My frown deepened and I didn't care to give his words much thought. “There’s looking out for me and then there's being a massive prick, Matty.”
With a huffed breath of a laugh, Matty trailed his thumb down my jaw to skirt over the bottom edge of my lip. His eyes finally met mine. “He went about it the wrong way, but he’s been good for you, baby. Looked after you and Teds for years, got you through some hard times, and so for that I give him a little leeway.”
My expression softened.
Matty’s fingers pinched my chin as he coaxed me back up to meet his gaze.
“Do that for me?” He asked, and who was I to say no to an ask like that?
Instead of answering him though, I simply leaned in and kissed him sweetly, cradling his jaw in my hands so that I could thumb over the tops of his cheeks. I wondered, momentarily, where I’d gotten so lucky.
–
A kid in the studio had both its perks and disadvantages, Matty had soon come to see.
Squeaks had been messaging Finn not long before he’d gone to set off, slowly pulling out some clean clothes from the ever growing pile he kept adding to each time he went round to her flat, whilst Teds completed his phonics, sat on the bed.
He’d kept calling out to Matty whenever he’d stumble onto the next, asking him to sound it out for him before trying to memorise it himself. Matty had enjoyed it- enjoyed all the time he spent with the little monster as a matter of fact- but helping him with the lessons he knew that Teddy would soon carry on further into his life… He didn’t know, it just settled something within him. Made him feel needed.
He hadn’t ever felt much of that.
Anyway, Squeaks had come into the bedroom just as he’d been tugging on a jumper, one she had said she’d liked the last time he’d worn it, and mentioned that she had to get ready to drop Teddy off round Adi’s so that she could head on over to meet Finn.
Matty had tried to keep his expression fairly neutral each time she mentioned the man. Because he hadn’t lied earlier when he’d asked for her to give her mate the benefit of the doubt. But it still irked him. The whole situation did, in truth. See because he knew that he was running on fucking borrowed time here with her. He’d never claimed to have been a lucky man either, so he knew that something was bound to happen sooner or later. He was merely praying that he’d be able to hold onto this small bubble of peace he’d found for himself for as long as he possibly could.
Teddy had appeared put out by the fact that he would have to head on over to Adi’s, who still lived with her elderly grandmother. All pouty and sweet looking, proper cute in actuality, and Matty had honestly gone and spoken before his mind had even had a chance to catch up with his massive mouth.
Mouse had been just as surprised by his offer to let Teds tag along with him down to the studio, spilling out claims that it would be fine with the guys (who’d yet to even meet the tyke) and that they weren’t actually working on anything too big that afternoon (just recording the ending of a session). And even though Matty hadn’t exactly asked the lot of them beforehand either, he figured it to be true enough.
And with the relief that had visibly fallen off of Squeaks at his reassurance, Matty hadn’t had it in himself to regret the offer. So with that, he’d set to helping her get Teddy ready for the day and then headed out the door.
Thing was though, the last time he’d ever gotten the tube with a little kid had been years before when his mum had visited with Lou. And back then she’d been the one to worry over his every move, not wanting to lose him in the crowd or have him swept under a carriage. Gruesome yeah, but it was a real fucking fear Matty realised.
This time around it had been his turn though, and God, did he feel sorry for all the shit he’d given his poor mum throughout the years. Was this why parents looked so tired all the fucking time?
Teddy was good enough though, curious sure, always asking questions and pointing at everything, but he listened, held onto his hand and didn’t ever wander off. He’d enjoyed counting the stops on the train too and didn’t think much of the few stares they’d gotten on the platform and again when they’d sat down.
By the time they’d made it to the studio, Matty had felt as though he’d just gone and ran a half marathon.
It was only when Teds had crowded into his trouser leg upon first walking through the entrance that he realised that this was just as new to Teddy as it was to him, and the fact that he was now being forced into an unknown setting probably didn’t make things much easier for the kid.
Still, he had managed to perk up on the small tour Matty had given him. Wanting to ease his nerves before they ventured much further, it had just been the two of them wandering the halls aimlessly and simply nodding or smiling at the very few people who passed them by.
It was only once Matty had figured it time to head into the room the band usually booked did Teddy quieten again.
“Where’ve you been? Only texted you like twenty times!” Matty heard George huff from around the short corner they were hidden behind after he’d called out to let them know that it was just him.
Matty paused by the door to cast a glance down at Teddy, but the kid was already looking at everything the walls had to offer; the big plaques with the even bigger names, the posters and many album covers that dotted the dark paint. It was only when Matty crouched down to level with him did Teddy glance back.
“You alright, monster?” He asked quietly, wanting to give Teds a second to wrap his head around things. Matty noted that he was back to chewing on his lip again, eyes wide and unsure, but Teddy gripped onto the hand Matty silently offered him.
After a moment, Teddy nodded at the question and Matty gave him a hopeful smile. “Good, ‘cause imma need you to kick this sorry lot into shape for me, alright? I mean, I know I’m good but they can’t just depend on me for everything, can they?”
He was gifted a quiet giggle, one which eased Matty’s mind a tad.
“Matt!”
Matty rolled his eyes at the shout of his name then shook his head mockingly at Teddy, who seemed to have jumped a bit at the beckon. “Told you, didn’t I?” He tutted playfully to the boy, rolling his eyes too for added effect, “Fall apart if I’m not here.”
Teddy was back to smiling now, “Like mum.”
Matty laughed at the comparison, certain that Squeaks would say that she had a much harder job with the show than he did here in the booth. But Matty wasn’t too inclined to disagree, she worked far too hard in truth.
“Exactly, mate.” He replied anyway, then nodded in the direction of the many voices that were bouncing their way towards them, watching as Teddy peered round him once more, “You think you’re gonna be okay?”
Teddy blinked and then looked over towards him, it was in moments like these which Matty saw just how much he resembled his mum, he reckoned it was those big eyes of theirs that held so much emotion.
“Yeah.” The boy finally breathed out and so Matty squeezed his hand just once in support, before lumbering back to his feet. He stole a quick breath for himself and then started leading them both further inside.
George was stationed where he always was, by the decks, surrounded by laptops and many a monitor. Ross was sprawled out on the beanbag they’d lugged in on day three, fiddling with the bass he held in hand. Hann, however, had chosen to sit nearest to the door and so he was the only one to glance upon at their nearing footsteps.
Matty watched on as a flash of surprise flickered across his mate’s face. Brows rose and a slow blink was seen before Adam finally smiled, looking every inch the father Matty knew him to be.
“Just who might you be then?” Hann greeted cheerfully whilst tucking his mobile back into his trouser pocket. He didn’t make a move to get up off the settee corner though, something which Matty felt immediately thankful for, it seemed neither of them wanted to crowd the kid just yet.
It was with that greeting though that Ross’s head finally shot up and George turned to face them in his big fancy chair. The pair of them flicked both alarmed and shock filled gazes to Matty, who did his very best to ignore their all too familiar mugs.
“This is Teddy.” Matty acknowledged, crouching down once more so that Teds could lean further into his side whilst his wide eyes surveyed their way about the rest of the room. Matty wondered what it must’ve felt like for him, struggling to recall moments from his own childhood when his mum and dad had brought him along to their interviews to sit in the audience.
“Teddy love, these three doughnuts are my mates. You remember, the ones I’m in a band with?”
Matty let Teddy have a second, waiting quietly as the little boy dragged his gaze back towards him with parted lips, he blinked and then nodded, hands wringing the sleeve of Matty’s jumper.
Matty merely smiled, bringing the kid in closer to press a quick kiss to his head of hair. “Look, Teds. See that one there, with the funny face? That’s Hann.” He was delighted to hear Teddy’s soft laughter, however muted it was, even as Adam scolded him with an unimpressed glare. “Then in the corner there, that guy?” Teddy dipped his chin, eyes trained on the bearded bloke who was grinning away like a twat, “That’s Ross, he looks like a giant but cries when he’s hungry.”
“I do not!” Ross shot back scathingly, narrowed eyes pointed at Matty which only proved to fuel Teddy’s quiet chuckles.
“Yeah alright, MacDonald.” Matty ignored whatever else Ross attempted to say after that, rolling his eyes theatrically towards Teddy before he gestured over to where George was sitting in his chair, pushing those pretentious sunglasses he often wore up onto his shaved head. “And that one there, that’s G.”
Teddy leaned in close again to whisper in Matty’s ear, “Drums.”
Matty chuckled despite himself, loathing the fact that of course Teds would have remembered the drummer. Most did. “Yeah, mate. That’s him.”
George quirked a brow at the hushed conversation shared but said nothing on it, at least not then. Instead he just waved Teddy on over, “You want to come see? Got a ton of buttons you can press.” He added as though he was trying to entice the kid.
Matty dampened the mirthful grin that crawled up onto his face when it seemed to work though, even as Teddy tugged him along by their joint pair of hands.
By the time Matty finally got around to stepping into the booth to record a few verses a while later, Teddy felt comfortable enough to wait for him just outside the door with the three giant idiots he’d left him with.
–
A stalemate.
That was where we were currently sat.
Even with everything that had gone down, him starting this whole mess, I had been the one to go to him. To his loft where he worked most days when he wasn’t with clients, or visiting galleries.
Finn had welcomed me in with his usual hello through the intercom, buzzing me up into the building and then meeting me just past the front door. He’d been kitted up when I’d entered, still in his apron and covered in paint, the latter of which he was trying to wash off when I first spotted him.
He’d had the kettle already going and he smiled slightly after asking me how I’d been. I’d been truthful, said that I was doing good- all things considered.
There’d been an awkward pause at that, the two of us unsure on where we should then go with the encounter, but the kettle had whistled and on instinct I had turned to grab the mugs.
He had nodded gratefully, but then gestured me over to where his colourful sofa sat by the large open bay windows, joining me with two steaming brews not a minute later.
“How’s Teds?”
I licked at my lower lip at the question, peering into the still swirling mug. “Good, on Easter break soon enough.”
“What have they been working on then?” Finn asked next, because we both knew this was a safe topic, an easy starter.
“Phonics at the moment,” I replied with a small smile that couldn’t quite be helped, recalling the way Teddy had puttered around after Matty this morning calling out each sound he’d needed to learn. “He sounds them out after breakfast most days and then again at night.” We shared a brief smile, before I mentioned, “Matty’s been helping too.”
Finn hummed.
I pressed my lips together to keep from blurting out everything I wanted to say at the sound of it, attempting to stick to the plan I’d formed on my way over here. Letting Finn open up on his own, rather than come in all guns blazing.
“How is that going then?”
My brow pinched as I peered over at him from across the settee, “What, with Matty and I?”
Another hum, though this one was accompanied by a slight nod.
I was wary of how to answer Finn, especially after having learnt what the man truly thought about our whole relationship, but figured I should at least be honest.
“We’re happy.” I love him. “He’s good for me, I think.” It terrifies me. “He brings out a part of me that I haven’t seen much of since- I don’t know, maybe my first year of uni?” I let go of a breathy chuckle, picking at the wrinkled hem that sat at the knee of my jeans. “It’s been, really nice.”
When I chanced a glance back up, it was only to find Finn already looking back at me, his expression carefully set, almost as though he was trying to suss out any sort of lie in my answer. I waited a second and then he smiled. Nothing less than genuine, and I felt my whole body relax at the sight of it.
“I’m sorry for how I reacted.” Finn spoke softly, placing his cup down on a side table to slide on a tad bit closer. He rubbed at the back of his wrist before settling his hands in his lap, “I shouldn’t have gone about it the way I did, I just- You know I care so much, Mouse. And this is me in no way asking to be let off the hook or anything of the like, but, you have to remember I was there through it all.”
Frowning slightly at his words, I followed Finn’s prior motion, putting my own mug down so that I could pull a leg up under me, settling nearer.
He let go of an exhale, “I was there when you found out about Teddy, I was there before that and then after. I saw the line of broken hearts you left in your wake, chasing this thrill you sought so hard to find, and all of the games you wanted to play.”
He took my hand then and I just let him, thinking on his words, on how it must have seemed to someone else looking in from the outside. I knew I’d been a right mess after leaving home.
In truth, I’d been a mess since the night of the accident, when my whole world had been flipped on its head, turning me into this scarred little kid. Leaving me not only alone, but wanting to chase after everything I felt I’d missed out on because of it the second that I’d gotten the chance. Which had meant finding friends and casual sex, bar hopping and clubbing for days on end, looking for the next best thing to simply entice or excite me.
Finn had been there.
He’d been there through most of it, if not it all. He had watched me jump from guy to guy, get my stomach pumped at the local A&E, not just once but three times. He’d been the one I had turned to in my lowest moments, when I’d felt dirtied, when I’d just wanted to cry, or to merely laugh. He was there.
I could understand what Matty had meant now.
‘He looked after you and Teds for years, got you through some hard times, and so for that I give him a little leeway.’
“I can still picture your face, you know.” Finn murmured, stare fixed on the tight hold I now had on his hand. “That night you turned up at mine after finding out that you were pregnant. You looked a fucking state, soaking wet from the rain and wearing only your pjs.” We shared a light chuckle that echoed before drifting off. “It broke me, to see you like that.”
“I know.” I whispered in a rasp, emotions clinging to the back of my throat.
Finn only smiled sadly. “But it worked out. Enough that you seemed happy enough with what you had. And I know that Teddy will always be enough fro you, but you deserve so much. You deserve to live and to love, to have that family you’ve always dreamed of.” I went to protest but he just shook his head, “I know it’s what you want, Mouse. You don’t have to say anything for me to notice the looks you give other parents in the park, or the kids who meet their mums and dads in the school playground. I can see how much you want that, and not just for Teds. But for you too.”
I swallowed thickly, feeling all too seen suddenly.
Finn squeezed my hand, forcing me to meet his gaze once more. I hadn’t even realised I had shied away. “Does he do that? Does he give you that hope?”
The inside of my cheek had practically been bitten raw these last few days, but it didn’t stop me from chewing on it again as I looked over at Finn with a watery stare. “I think so.”
With a slow, albeit fond, tilt of his head, Finn hauled an arm over my shoulder to crowd me into his side. The two of us huddled in close on his artsy sofa that would look so out of place anywhere else.
I smiled at the thought.
“If he means that much to you, then I’ll make up for what I did. What I said.” Finn reassured me, his voice quiet in the large expanse of his loft. I hadn’t actually expected it to go this way. “But I do want to know. I want to make sure that he knows that he’s not just getting you out of this, that Teddy isn’t a deal breaker here. That he’s grown enough to understand the implications and repercussions of his life and whatever the fuck goes on with it. That he is clean-”
I opened my mouth, guard jumping right back up. But Finn just tucked my head under his chin, hand gripping at my shoulder enough to keep me there with him.
“Sobriety is hard. I understand that. When it finally comes to light that he actually is with you, that means Teddy too, and it’ll be a fucking mess. I want to make sure that he won’t fuck up and throw it all away the second shit gets hard.”
Inhaling, I could only nod. I knew what he meant, it was something I had thought about an awful lot. Too much in fact, I’d worried enough over it that I was still so wary over whether or not to broach the topic with Matty himself. But I hoped, for the first time in a long while.
And that had to be enough for now.
–
Finn’s had been an emotional affair, but not a place I’d lingered too long after our initial apology. We both still needed some time to process and to lick over our wounds.
I’d been more than thankful for it though, it had been a real weight off of my shoulders in truth, because knowing that there was a chance to move on past it without having to pick and choose, or divide my time, was something I hadn’t really held out hope for.
I was a pessimist at heart.
But that being said, I’d been quite optimistic about Teddy’s few hours spent with Matty- alone. Which should’ve been daunting in retrospect, insane even, and had probably once been, but Matty had quickly come to prove himself not only to me, but to Teddy too. So although I’d been cautious, I hadn’t necessarily been quick to stamp out the idea.
The last little excursion the pair had been on without me had gone down a treat, with Teddy having been tuckered out and fast asleep the second he’d gotten into bed, and Matty having bonded further with him somehow.
Then there had been the whole ‘I love you’ mess.
And God, if anyone would’ve told me that I’d have been the one to say it first I would have laughed in their face. Cackled loudly enough to be heard three streets over and on the very urge of wetting myself. But then exactly that had happened.
The words had been lingering in the corners of my mind for a few weeks before last night. Tittering, almost. Having started popping up around Christmas time, with the unannounced gift giving ceremony we’d shared and the incredible bond Matty seemed to have formed with my son. And had then settled in not long after that demo I’d received and the midnight visit where Matty had turned up at my doorstep in a downpour.
I hadn’t loved.
Not really.
I’d loved people, friends and family. Sure.
But someone to keep? Someone that I could call mine?
No, that had never really felt like much of an option for me. And Matty… he’d sort of come out of nowhere, hadn’t he? This mess of a man, but so very wonderful in his own way. He had really crept up on me, and looking back it almost felt as though it was bound to happen. Us, I meant. It felt strange to imagine it any differently.
Messages now
I’m here! Come get me, it’s freezing!!
It didn’t take long before his telltale pop of curls emerged from the main entrance to the same studio I had found him perched outside of during the aftermath of the big mishap with Finn. It almost felt like coming full circle with our decision to have me meet the pair of them here after just having talked with Finn.
Matty’s grin was infectious as we moved to meet one another in a quiet hello, his arms catching themselves around my middle whilst I buried my face into the curve of his shoulder.
He was warm, that was my first thought even as he pressed a chaste kiss to my head, enough so that I didn’t mind the fact that he kept me tucked up under his arm as he pulled away to lead us back inside the building.
“You get here okay?” Matty asked me once the door had rattled shut behind us, his voice travelling in the sparse lobby like area I’d yet to get acquainted with.
Humming, I answered his question with a nod, “Yeah, walked most of it, Finn had a client call out of the blue.”
Matty’s cheeks hollowed a tad but he hummed too before tilting his head over to the right, we started to walk that way. “It go alright then?”
I let go of a heavy breath, eyes surveying every inch of the studio as we wandered further inside, “As well as it could have, I ’spose. It’ll take time, I reckon, though he wants to make it up to you, too.”
Matty appeared to blink at that, the words seemed to have caught him by surprise, but he didn’t falter in his wandering, leading me down a narrow walkway.
“Are you up for that?” I pushed.
He wet his lower lip in thought, dipping his head at a maintenance worker who passed us by before looking back at me. “Told you, I’d give him a little leeway. But I wanna know more about what you spoke about first. If that’s alright with you.”
I was nodding away before he could even tack that last bit on, “Of course, I wouldn’t think not to, in truth.”
I was gifted a sweet smile and quick peck to the cheek before Matty paused, his hand catching on the handle to a heavy door. Soundlessly we slipped past it, Matty closing it slowly behind us to stop it from banging against its hinges and alerting the rest of the room’s occupants to our sudden arrival. Not that it would’ve been all that easy a task, what with the noise that consumed you the second you entered.
Matty smirked at the look that must’ve crossed my face at the sound before he held a finger to his lips, signalling me to keep quiet. I rolled my eyes but took the hand he held out towards me, the two of us creeping over to the corner that gave way to the real chaos that greeted us beyond.
First thing I took notice of was the loudmouth four year old who had seemingly taken charge of the band’s rehearsal, a sight which had me biting my lip to muffle my sudden hysteria.
George was seated by a stretched desk full of slides and buttons, elbows rested on the tops of his thighs whilst he listened animatedly to Teddy’s thoughts on whatever he had Ross and Hann tinkering about with.
The latter two were just holding onto their instruments, Ross stood with his bass and nodding along to what strings Teddy pointed at, whilst Hann was told to ‘look happier’. Something Matty had immediately snorted at, endlessly amused by Adam being told to liven up by a kid who’d only been out of nappies for a little over a year and a half.
The snort seemed to catch George’s attention though because his head shot over at the sound, which in turn forced the rest of the room to follow.
I heard Teddy’s gasp before he came bounding over, wearing a pair of sunglasses that probably cost more than my monthly rent.
“Alright, lovie?” I laughed, swiping up an excited Teddy before he could barrel straight into my legs. “You been having a good time?”
Teddy’s enthusiastic nod was enough to assure me of that but then Ross spoke up, “Should hope so, been hounding me to get this bassline right for ages, ain't you, mate?” He smiled at the giant grin he received in turn before nodding over towards me, “He’s got a proper good ear though. Should get him into it soon, especially if he likes it.”
Blinking, I could only look back down at Teddy, who was now informing Matty on everything he’d missed out on in the sparse moments he’d been gone in a tangent like ramble.
George sniffed as he made to walk on over to us which forced me to glance up again. Hann had started to take off his guitar strap whilst Ross went back to fiddling with his strings once more. Seeingly wanting to get whatever he was working on down before he had to leave for the day.
“He’s a good kid.” George commented to me, watching on as Teddy reached out to be taken by Matty, the man not even second guessing the motion of catching the boy under his arms and settling him on his hip. “And Ross ain’t wrong either. He seemed to really enjoy himself, had him messing about with the console for a bit and Matty even got him to play a couple chords on the guitar for us.” He chuckled lowly, a soft sort of smile breaking up his typically stoic features.
“Hope he wasn’t too much for you guys, Matty reckoned you’d all be alright with him tagging along but I didn’t even think to double check.” I mentioned, eyes caught on the way Teddy was now so enthralled by the story he was telling both Matty and Hann, arms stretched out wide as he exaggerated something or other.
George was shaking his head when I glanced back at him, “It was nice. Having him here, but seeing Matt with him too.” George’s mouth thinned when he lifted a hand to tug on his ear, “I didn’t think he could be like that. It’s strange, him letting someone else hog the limelight whilst he’s sat on the outskirts.”
We both shared a fond chuckle, because I could see what he meant but also, “He’s taken to Teddy better than I expected, really. It’s something I’m most thankful for, as well as the fact that Teddy seems to really like him too.”
My smile was warm, I could tell, and when George caught a glimpse of it I got to watch him almost mimic the gesture, as though he was thankful for it all too.
“You’re good for him.”
My breath caught a little at that, but I kept on smiling as I peered over at Teddy and Matty who were giggling between themselves whilst Hann, and now Ross, had seemingly taken to shaking their heads at the pair in indulging amusement.
“He’s good for me.”
…
The walk home from the studio had been spent hand in hand. The three of us just padding along the narrowing pavement, Matty more often than not trailing alongside the curb so that we could keep it up.
Teddy seemed to enjoy it though, even more so when Matty and I had started up a game with him, lifting him up off his feet so that he could swing back and forth in midair for a few brief moments.
By the time we’d made it home we were all just content to find something to eat and curl up in front of the tele, me listening to Teddy tell me all about his day with Matty whilst Matty pulled my feet into his lap.
He put Teddy to bed not long after, upon the boy’s sleepy request, and had returned about fifteen minutes later, having read a story and bundled Teddy up under his duvet covers. It had been then that I’d gotten to tell Matty more about the conversation I’d had with Finn, rehashing his words and even delving a little deeper into my past with him.
“How long have you known him again?” Matty asked me, thumb trailing back and forth over the jut of my knee whilst the tv played on low.
“Only since the first year of uni.”
Matty appeared quite surprised by that, he said so too. “Seems like longer.” I grinned tiredly at his musings, eyes squinting with it as I leant further into his side.
“It does a lot of the time, but sometimes it doesn't. Wasn’t lucky enough to have been gifted a group of bandits and made to start a band.” I teased, not unkindly, appreciating the way his hand travelled up to run his fingers through my hair. I peered up at him, “They’re all so lovely, you know.”
He answered me with an airy titter, the sound soft enough not to echo out of the living room and down the hall to where Teddy slept, “You’ve never been on tour with them, sweetheart.”
I laughed then too. “Maybe, but Teddy likes them. And I like them too.”
“I’m glad.” Matty whispered, pressing a kiss to the crown of my head. When he pulled away, I moved to capture his hand in my own. “You have anyone like that?”
I shook my head minutely, not wanting him to disturb his position, “No, wasn’t in school long enough to make any lasting friendships and then I guess when you reach a certain age it always feels a little harder.”
A quiet swept over us then and I took the time to simply admire the few tattoos Matty's forearms held; the passport number, the box, the postcode on his inner elbow.
“Was that because of what happened?”
His voice was cautious, which was unusual for Matty and more than likely the cause which had me peering up at him, rather than his ask that had gone and broken our peaceful bout of silence.
My nose wrinkled, “What, with my scars?”
Matty gave a soft hum of assent, watching me from under a careful gaze, obviously anxious not to overstep or force my hand on the matter. I smiled at his care and gave his hand a gentle squeeze.
“Yeah, it shook me a lot. I mean, I spent weeks in hospital and then after that, I was on strict bed rest whilst at home.” I explained to him, fingertips trailing over the faint grooves in his palm. “I was homeschooled for a long time too and when I did finally go back, well most of my class didn’t much care for me beyond the horror story they’d been told. It grew old quickly enough though, but even so it was hard to connect with people beyond the basic level.”
Matty’s thumb had begun to trail over the skin of my wrist, settling once or twice on my pulse point before going back to stroking again. “What did happen? I mean, only if you’re alright with saying anything about it, I know sometimes shit can still be hard.”
I breathed out an airy chuckle, turning my head to hide my enamoured smile in the wrinkle of his jumper. “I don’t mind. I don’t like mentioning it with strangers much, which is why it’s not really public knowledge unless you go digging. But it was a car accident.”
I felt Matty tense beneath me but his touch didn’t stray, only became that bit bolder, the hand in my hair coaxing me to glance up at him so that he could kiss me sweetly, nose nudging at the curve of my cheek before withdrawing. I hummed happily.
“My dad was with the local police. High up, but a drinker. Only started though after this one case, and then it spiralled. My mam worked night shifts sometimes at the hospital, which was a good way away from where we lived, so it would just be him and me until she got home.”
I took a breath, realising it had been quite sometime since I’d actually spoken about the crash, or even thought of it really. The scars were a constant reminder, yes, but the crash itself was something that had occurred almost two decades ago now, so I’d had time to sort of come to terms with it. As much as I could.
Not to say that it still didn’t wear at me, it had been a big event in my life, changed things in more ways than one. Because it had also been the spark which had sent my dad packing.
“It’d been raining that night, I remember ‘cause the water had been leaking in from under the backdoor. My dad had sworn up a fucking storm when he’d noticed it but could only really stick a couple towels down, claiming that he’d fix it on his next day off.”
A light chuckle escaped me at the vivid memory my mind made up, his tall figure, the odd phrasings he would use, but nothing of real substance. I couldn’t quite recall his face, or the depth of his voice, seeing as I hadn’t looked over old videos or photos we had since I’d visited mum back home.
“It had been a bad storm, had the tides reaching the cliff peaks if I remember rightly. Which meant that the hospital had started to flood, at least the north ward where mam had worked.” I continued, enjoying the delicate caress of Matty’s thumb as it trailed up my arm, “She’d been sent home after they’d managed to move most of the patients on the ground floor westward, but her car broke down about a mile out.”
I could hear the call even now, the sound of my dad’s heavy footsteps when he’d come to wrap me up in a coat, murmuring that we had to go and pick her up.
“The winds picked up, I guess. Dad didn’t have a car seat, that was what we used mam’s car for. So he just sat me in the front seat before setting off.”
Matty’s touch faltered slightly, probably having suspected where I was headed with this before it picked up once again. “The rain was relentless and we weren’t too far from the shore so it almost felt as though it was just thick sludge falling from the sky. It was hard to see past the first metre or so.”
I swallowed, noting how the light from the tv screen stretched out across the floor and flickered each time a scene changed.
“Our town wasn’t huge, but it was big enough to warrant a couple T-junctions and the odd roundabout. There was a fourway, just up past the old baptist church, a road mostly used for when you were coming off the main motorway or headed out towards the airport. Dad had been drinking, you could smell it on him some days, but at night it was always stronger. He blew through it, the traffic light teetering on amber before it finally turned red.”
Staring blankly out across the living room, I could almost picture it. The downpour which had clouded the windscreen, the old dash of my dad’s car, the familiar scent of his preferred brand of tobacco.
I licked at my lower lip, mouth suddenly dry. “A van had been crossing. On the passenger side.” I added quietly, appreciating the grip of Matty’s hand as I carried on, “All I really remember after that are headlights and the blare of a horn. Woke up a couple days later, having missed my seventh birthday and my dad nowhere to be seen.”
I huffed a small chuckle, reaching up to rub at my eyes before turning to face Matty. I wasn’t quite prepared for the wet gaze I’d been met with or the single tear that had seemingly escaped and come to a pause on the bridge of his upper lip.
I lifted a hand up to wipe it away, smiling when he kissed the pad of my thumb.
“You’re incredible, you know that.”
I’d been called many things, but I don’t think incredible was one of them.
I leaned in to kiss him, wanting nothing more than the feel of having him close, even if that meant tasting the salt of his tears or enduring that careful way he held my face. It was everything I had needed then.
–
After the little moment I had shared with Matty the previous night, I’d gone to bed feeling a little more drained that usual, but I’d put it down to the exhausting day I’d had and the fact that Matty’d had to head home so that he could do a skype interview early the next morning.
I’d almost been tempted to say that he could do it here in the flat, but with Teddy you could never tell when the kid would be coming or going, so it was safer for Matty to stick to his typical routine.
But I’d woken up all sniffly and foggy headed the next morning. The pounding at the base of my skull had forced me up out of bed in search of painkillers, as well as the fact that it had just gone ten, which meant that Teds was already up and mulling about.
I took a couple of nurofen I had tucked away in the medicine cupboard with a glass of water and figured I’d be better getting a move on with my day than heading back to bed. I knew that Matty would be popping round sooner or later too, so I attempted to sort through a load of washing that desperately needed to be done as well as tidy away the mess we’d created last night.
Teddy had helped himself to a banana from the fruit bowl at some point but was already asking for breakfast by the time I’d stuck the washing machine on- unaware of how close to crying I’d been after I’d gone and dropped a wad of detergent on the floor.
Even so, I’d set to start on a pot of porridge, knowing he would enjoy it with either some jam or spread, but I was surprised when I heard the front door rattle shut not long later, having not heard a knock nor Teddy answer it. I went to scold him, frowning at the fact that he thought he could just answer the door to anyone when Matty appeared with a few Tesco bags in hand.
“I knocked on the window, so he saw me before he let me in,” Matty was quick to rush out, grinning down at Teddy who had since spotted his breakfast and made a dive for it. “Figured I’d grab some stuff before stopping in, knew you mentioned feeling crap last night before I left so..”
He shrugged, moving over towards the kitchen before I could even think up a reply, a little bewildered by the fact that anyone would have the foresight, let alone the sincerity to do something like this for me.
“Matty.” I breathed out, so utterly warmed by the gesture as I followed after him, “You didn’t have to.”
Matty rolled his eyes at me, settling the bags down on the counter, “Shut up, you idiot. Just let me feel like an adult for once, yeah?”
I laughed, unable to help myself, even as he gestured for me to take a seat at the table, claiming I looked a little warm and confirming it when he pressed his hand to my rosy cheeks.
“Do you ever stop?” He questioned around an exasperated smile, settling some basic cold medicines down as well as a few sweet treats. “Washing machine’s already going, the kid’s been fed, floor seems to have been swept too. How’ve you not dropped?”
I rolled my eyes at his ever growing eccentrics, though was still wearing a rather pleased smile. It was nice, I deemed, having someone look after me for once.
“I can’t stop, babe, got things to do, a tiny person to look after!”
Matty just shook his head at that, obviously not too happy with my retort, “Guess we’re just gonna have a lazy day then, yeah? Got snacks, popcorn even. Reckon Teds will enjoy it. I can even take him out to the park for a bit, just to let him run off some of that energy.”
I blinked at the maddening man stood before me. Wondering what I’d done to deserve all of the things he'd done for me. And without having even been asked.
“Haven’t you got stuff to do?” I queried, content to simply watch him unpack the shopping he’d bought.
Matty shrugged a single shoulder, wrapping up a carrier bag and tucking it into the stash I kept hidden beneath the sink. “Nothing important.”
“The interview went alright then?”
He hummed, putting a couple tins of soup away in a cupboard just above his head. “Yeah, fine. Hann did it with me, other guy was in Paris or some other, I think. Definitely French though.” His phone sounded then, but it seemed he’d left it in the pocket of his jacket which he’d gone and thrown over the back of a chair upon walking in. “Look at that for me, would you?” He asked, peering down at a carton of something or other, probably pondering over whether or not it went in the fridge.
I was only a little surprised by his request, but did so anyway, trying to find the phone in one of his many deep pockets. “Definitely French?” I prompted, smirking smugly over at him before my fingers finally found the device. “You sound so certain, Healy. Almost as though you’ve been taking notes on the French dialect, or something like it.”
Chuckling to himself, Matty flashed me a big smile from over his shoulder before turning away with a wink. “The French are fit, baby.”
I laughed lightly with a halfhearted shake of my head, then peered down at his phone, “Password?”
“0709.” He told me, and so with a slight pinch in odd wonderment I typed it in.
“Why that?” I couldn’t help but ask, only glancing up again when I heard the shuffle of his feet. I raised a single eyebrow. “What, is it like the death of your guinea pig or something?”
Matty’s face pitched itself into a hearty grimace that made me cackle. “My guinea pig? Who the fuck owns a guinea pig?” He shook his head at me, deciding it wasn’t worth the effort and instead said, “It’s the date we met.”
My eyes widened considerably. “Actually?”
With a light huff, he turned back to putting things away, “Thing gets lost or nicked more times than not, so I’m always changing my passwords. Figured I’d remember that one.”
“Matty!” I all but awed, honestly feeling the love. “You can be such a sap sometimes, you know that. The day we met!”
I received a glare in retort but I simply laughed at him before turning to look down at the message he’d just received. My forehead furrowed.
“You said you had nothing going on today!” I was quick to accuse, eyes flashing up to meet his somewhat startled face, “George’s party is tonight!”
Matty’s mouth formed a little ‘o’ before he merely shrugged, “G will get over it if I can’t make it. You need me here more, and besides, his birthday isn't even for a couple more days. They’re only throwin’ it tonight so that most people can make it.”
I looked heavenwards, hoping that the second pause would give me a little bit of strength. Did it fuck. “Matty, you’re not staying here with us when George, your best mate might I add, is out celebrating his birthday! He’ll want you there.”
“Squeaks, you’re sick. He’ll underst-”
I shook my head, “No, you’re going. I’ve got a little cold, nothing that’s gonna kill me. What will kill me though is you not going to be with G on his special day.”
Matty narrowed his eyes a tad, “Don’t guilt trip me.”
My next bout of laughter couldn’t be helped. “I’m not!”
With a scoff, Matty turned to put the carton he’d held in the side door of the fridge, shaking his head as though I was the one being outlandish. “It’s fine, alright?” He said once he’d spun back around, “I’d much prefer being here anyway.”
My head dropped to the side as I looked up at him, “Babe, please go. It would honestly mean a lot to me, but even more so to George. You know, who’s birthday it is. Go on. Please?”
Matty sighed and ended up dropping himself into the opposing chair, I slid his phone on over to him. “What about you though, and Teddy?” He asked and it was sweet, how much he cared.
“We’ll be fine.” I assured him, reaching out to take his hand, “The party isn’t til later anyway, so how about we stick with your lazy day idea and then when you need to start heading out, I can just pop Teds in the bath and get him ready for bed.” When Matty still didn’t seem too keen on the idea, I squeezed his hand a tad and added, “You can even head back here after if you want.”
He perked up at that, but was still a little resistant to the whole idea of leaving.
