My Personal Deities Post: Hades
SAll right, Hades, my wonderful little shit.
I first started working with Hades because he is the greek god of the underworld. I am terrified of death, what comes after, and being abandoned. From a young age I internalized loved ones dying as them giving up on life and abandoning those they love. Can’t tell you exactly why my brain took death this way, but it did. Every time I’m faced with the death of a loved one, I have a really hard time. This fear of abandonment has translated into fear of losing friendships too. So I wanted to work with a deity that could help me overcome, or at least lessen, the fear of death and abandonment.
I turned to Hades initially because I was already working with a few other Greek Gods, and I hadn’t started exploring other Pantheons yet. Ultimately this was a good choice, because Hades has stuck by me no matter what and really been there for me. Whenever there’s a new threat of loss, he’s right there, waiting, knowing, a little irritated that I’m ignoring him. He won’t leave until I talk to him and finally face my feelings. I always feel better after wards.
I don’t believe in the Greek version of the afterlife, but that’s never bothered Hades. He understands that my views are much more universal than tied to one particular pantheon. He still sits there and comforts me and helps me process when things are tough and death is imminent (I’m only 26 and already all my grandparents have passed, I’ve lost multiple uncles, my aunt is currently very ill, suicide is a real big trigger, and cancer is the literal devil for my family) so death is on my mind frequently. He knows when to be gentle and when to be annoying af in as much as sitting there and pestering me because I’ve been avoiding my feelings for too long. In the time that I’ve been working with him, I’ve felt a lot of my anxieties about death ease up. I still have a long way to go, but he’s with me every step of this journey.
He’s also a little shit. I say so in the most loving and respectful way possible. Think Hades from the Disney movie. Incredibly sassy, slightly irritating, but somewhat lovable anyway. Hades is the reason I had to create personal boundary rules with all my spirits. He loves to just show up directly behind me as if he’s peering over my shoulder. When I was new to this it scared the shit out of me. So I created a rule about personal space. He responded by making his presence known through standing outside and staring up at my window in the most creepy way possible. OR just somehow floating outside the window staring in. Had to create a rule about that. It’s all in jest, he’s never creepy and he does ultimately follow the rules.
One funny story, my first roommate in graduate school knew I was pagan. I was pretty upfront with her about it and she didn’t seem too upset, but she made it clear she didn’t want spirits hanging out near her. She didn’t care if they were in my room, but needed to leave her alone. We were having a similar conversation to this one time where I assured her they won’t bother her. suddenly I sense Hades. He’s just sitting on the chair, fingers tented in front of him, eyebrow raised in an “Oh won’t I?” smirk. He never did, but that’s his energy. He also refuses to claim an oracle deck. I speak to many of my deities through oracle readings, and most of them have a deck they’ve claimed that they’ll pull me towards when they want to talk. Hades hasn’t claimed one, he frequently insists that I only speak to him using the spirit board. Just to be a lovable pain. He’s also quiet or very demanding. I know when Hades wants something like a new stone as an offering. He’ll be very loud about it.
So yeah, I work a lot with Hades to overcome my fears of death and abandonment, and to have some fun every once in a while when he’s being a real pain. As I said in Persephone’s post, I do worship him separately as well as in the context of his marriage. I think he’s one of the few, if not the only Greek God who is actually loyal to his wife, who loves her, is devoted to her etc. I think they’re the ultimate power couple and are couple goals.
Offerings to Hades include walking around in cemeteries, paying attention to abandoned graves, leaving coins on the premises, etc. When a girl in my hometown was killed in a hit and run accident, I left daffodils for him on her little pop up memorial. (almost blew that cos I spent 90% of the time I was there praying to Mani, and then Hades was all loud and obnoxious until i remembered this was an act to him). I’ll buy daffodils just to have in the house every once in a while when its their time. He really likes them, but not mint. He fessed up to killing my mint plant a few years ago.
My favorite offering that was ultimately to both him and Persephone: My ex bought me flowers for valentines day. It was the first time anyone had bought me flowers in a romantic context. Most flowers I’ve had have been bought by myself, or given to me by family/ friends in the context of illness or for dance recitals. I dried the bouquet once it started to die so that I could have it either as a keepsake or for something else. When the relationship went to shit I didn’t really know what to do with the bouquet. I didn’t want to toss it out, thought maybe I’d use it for a spell or something. Finally one day it hit me, I could give it to Hades and Persephone, ask them to take away some of my pain and help me move forward so that I could find a better relationship.
Well, I took the bouquet, vase and all, to my favorite cemetery, left it tucked in the roots of a huge tree there, as an offering to both of them. They really seemed to appreciate it and it felt like the most appropriate way to release some of the lingering energy from that relationship.
