Ren was ready to go. Ren works at a hipster cafe in downtown and doesn’t call himself a hipster. The cafe’s name is Fuel and it sells butter coffee… (meaning that it is as hipsterish as it can get) Ren always runs into Hyuck who works at the bike shop right next to Fuel. Perhaps they both have the same time shifts. They’ve always known each other’s face and the fact that they both work at the two stores in their downtown corner, but never said a thing to each other. Their first impressions on each other must have been something similar to “…another poor small thing.”
Ren was sick of this town. His town was a vacation place for old people to come by. There were barely any teens or young people around his age. Ren dropped out of high school and decided to take GED, studying from home. Ren thought he could swing it because he always got As and Bs when he used to commute to a small high school that is 30 min from his house. Ren’s parents didn’t seem to care. They were perfectly happy in their “vacation home” with their newborn baby. As much as Ren loved his very very young sister, he did not understand their parents at all. Mom, it is called “vacation home” for a reason. Then his mom would come back saying, “then get your own damn place when you turn 18.” Because Ren was reaching 18 and had barely any money in his bank account, he shut up. He sometimes wondered how Hyuck lived. Does he go to school? Is he the same age as me? Or does he just look young because he is an asian? Why does he live here? These were questions that Ren never intended to actually ask.
Until, Hyuck called Ren’s name when he was finishing up his shift one day.
Ren strangely stared at Hyuck who was by the door with a bike helmet in his hand. What the…?
Ren replied with no attempt to hide his emotion.
“Oh, just. Your boss wanted me to bring his helmet by.”
Hyuck walked up to the counter and put down the helmet. Did Ren’s boss ride bikes? How the hell would Ren know. In fact Ren did not care at all.
“How’d you know my name?”
This was what Ren was curious about.
“I just heard some customers call you by Ren, and I asked your boss what your name is.”
Okay. That is not creepy at all, Ren thought to himself.
“Well, thanks. I’ll tell Sarah (Ren’s boss, the owner of Fuel) that you came by.”
“Aren’t you done with your shift?”
How did you know? Ren did not ask this question as he knew Hyuck’s shifts as well.
“I was wondering if we could just grab a bite?”
Why? Ren again swallowed a question. Instead, he just nodded and put his apron away.
Hyuck and Ren went to a small burger place (that serves breakfasts as well) and each ordered a sandwich. Ren was so curious about the changes happening to his mundane routine.
Ren asked, just to make a conversation.
“Yeah, but a little far from downtown.”
“Cool. Do you bike here?”
“Why, because I work at a bike shop?”
Hyuck asked with a smirk. Ren felt a bit embarrassed.
“I was just kidding. I do love biking. That’s why I’m working there.”
Okay… Cool… Ren did not know what else to say. How did I make conversations with people when I was in high school? Why am I acting like such a moron.
Hyuck spoke, staring at his dish, not looking into Ren’s face.
“It’s pretty. I like red.”
Ren and Hyuck started to have dinner together after their shifts from then on. It just kind of happened. Ren didn’t like spending his money on food, but he didn’t want to miss out hanging out with Hyuck. Hyuck’s hair color was orange-isn bright brown, that kind of sparkled when it was under sunlight. Ren decided that he very much liked Hyuck since Hyuck complimented his red hair. (Ren’s mom called it ‘trying to be punk.’ WTF, Mom? Punk is not even relevant. Are you living 2004? And I’m sure ~punk people~ would disagree with you, too.)
Hyuck was small, but Ren was even smaller. They never made comments about that. Ren wanted to grow taller so he could look more grown, a little bit more manly, though he didn’t know what being manly actually meant. To Ren, Hyuck seemed “manly” enough. Despite his hight, Hyuck had wider shoulders than Ren and liked “masculine” things, such as biking, computer games, and football (completely Ren’s opinion). Ren, on the other side, liked drawing in his room. He also liked painting when he had the necessary equipments in his high school. However Ren thought of his hobbies and interests somewhat less masculine. Why am I watching ballet tutoring on youtube? Shouldn’t I be watching, like, gaming youtubers’ gaming shit?
Hyuck responded to Ren’s concerns with a brush off.
“I don’t think it matters.”
“No, being masculine or feminine or… whatever.”
“Because that is so boring. I don’t like computer games and biking because they seem manly to me. I like them because I just do.”
But… Ren did not know what to come back with. You can say that because you are naturally fit to be so. Ren just swallowed his thought. I don’t want to look like a weirdo, thought Ren.
Ren was always the prettiest of his class. From kindergarten to high school. A lot of girls liked Ren and wanted to hang out with him. Nontheless, Ren got made fun of sometimes by a group of guys whom Ren always beat up. His college counselor even asked Ren if he is queer and wants to go to a queer-friendly college. Ren thought that was rude at the time, and still does, but now he gets that his counselor wanted to do good. Many dumb Americans trying to be nice to the minorities and doing all the wrong things. Ren shook his head. He never bothered to think about his sexuality. He masturbated to just random porns that he could easily google and went to various school events with his closest girl-friend at the time. It was actually the first time Ren made a close guy friend. Ren’s mom was happy to hear the news.
“Great! I thought you were gay or something!”
Ren never felt more sure about leaving the town than then.
“Do you want to leave this town? Like, eventually?”
Asked Ren one day, having donuts for dinner.
“I haven’t really thought about it. Why do you ask?”
“You never thought about it? Do you like this town?”
It’s okay? Ren did not understand.
“But, if you were to leave… I’d go with you.”
Added Hyuck. Ren’s face turned confused. Hyuck’s face did not seem to show anything. The sun was setting and it was getting chilly. Ren leaned his body towards Hyuck’s trying to keep warmth. They could see the entire downtown turning into orange on the roof they were sitting on. Ren thought it was actually beautiful. It was the first time Ren found some sort of beauty that he could admire in this town.