in which; you meet nett at a party through a friend, both high out of your minds and looking for an escape. what started as casual hookups turns into you helping him try to get sober, at least as much as he'll let you.
cw: major themes of substance/alcohol use + abuse, established "relationship," heavy themes/topics, mental lealth struggles
<- intro . pt.2 ->
this part is based off of this request <3
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a/n: hihi thank you sososo much for 1000 followers thats so crazy i love u all so much <3 im so excited for hollis' new single!
in which; you meet nett at a party through a friend, both high out of your minds and looking for an escape. what started as casual hookups turns into you helping him to get sober, at least as much as he'll let you.
cw: major themes of substance/alcohol use + abuse, established "relationship," heavy themes/topics, mental health struggles, all from his pov
inwhich! you and gunner take a late-night stop to a convenience store in tokyo together for the first time.
metalking! i loved writing this, i thought the idea was so cute! exams are almost over thankfully, i’ll get back to my regular updates in my stories soon! for now i hope you enjoy this! please like&reblog if you liked it, & comment your thoughts! <3
you’re in tokyo for a week because of modeling events, interviews, and brand events. you thought it’d be a nice getaway but it ended up being more stressful than you thought. everyday has been nonstop hair appointments, fittings, interviews, people fixing your clothes every five seconds, and flashing, bright lights constantly in your face.
meanwhile, gunner came with with you because he thought it would be “fun”, but the truth is he hates being away from you for so long.
by the third night you are exhausted, him not so much since he’s really just been sightseeing and supporting you behind the scenes.
it was almost two am and you finally got back to the hotel from a dinner event. the city was still bright and lively. you noticed that tokyo would never die down at night, even this late. you could see all the neon lights out, traffic, and the rain reflecting off the ground.
you kick your shoes off immediately upon entering the door.
“i’m actually dead.” you groan while collapsing onto the bed.
“you say that everyday.” gunner softly laughs while placing one of your bags down.
“because everyday feels like nonstop hell.”
he laughs once again, throwing his hoodie onto a nearby chair and walking over to the window.
it was quiet for a minute, only the sound of you sighing every once in a while and the city sounds muffling through.
gunner finally moves from the window, “i’m bored.”
you pick your head up in defeat, “at two in the morning?”
he shrugs, “yeah.”
“gunner,” you pause, sinking into the bed more, “i really don’t wanna.”
“cmon baby, come outside with me, it’ll be fun.” he nudged you.
you groaned loudly, partially as a joke, “outside where?”
“i dunno. somewhere. let’s go find out.” he said while dragging your body up, holding you by your waist.
“ugh, you know i hate going out with no plan.” you whine, mostly because you’re tired.
“it’s a new country, and new city that we’ve never been to.” he holds you close, you’re sitting down with your head to his stomach, “we’ll find something to do, i promise.”
despite complaining, ten minutes later you and gunner are downstairs leaving the hotel in hoodies and sweats, trying not to get recognized.
the air cold, and it smells like rain along with food from nearby restaurants. the cars passing by practically blind you, reflecting off the puddles on the ground.
he walks beside you, one hand shoved in his pocket and the other over your shoulders. you lean your head closer to him while looking at everything around you.
“this looks so fake, like unreal.” you say in awe.
“mhm.” he says slowly.
“you’re not even listening to me.” you take his arm off your shoulders.
“i am,” he says, “you said it looks fake.”
“whatever.” you look away, smiling.
he kisses you on the cheek, you pull away, rolling your eyes and laughing while he smiles.
you end up inside a tiny convenience store packed with snacks and drinks you’ve never heard of before. you knew a little bit of japanese, you had to learn the basics before coming on the trip, so you knew a thing or two.
gunner immediately gets distracted.
“what even is this?” he asks, holding up a drink with a dancing melon on it.
you shrug, “buy it.”
“we can’t just buy everything, y/n.” he smiles at you.
“says who?” you raise an eyebrow, “you scared?”
suddenly it becomes a competition. the next ten minutes you both spend grabbing random snacks off shelves and daring each other to try them while quietly arguing in the middle of the aisles.
at one point he disappears, you find him near the freezer section.
“what are you doing?” you say while holding a basket full of things.
“tryna find out which one looks the best just by the wrapper.” he says as he inspects two ice creams in his hands.
“i say the green one, it’s matcha flavored.” you smile and hold the basket towards him so he can put it in.
“matcha? how do you,” he paused, putting the other option down, “i forgot you took lessons on japanese.”
“jealous.” you nudge him and he rolls his eyes.
he takes the basket from you and puts all his items in it, you grab a candy that has bright and colorful package, but gunner snatches it from you.
“hey!” you say reaching back for it, but he holds his arm up too high.
“you don’t need all this sugar baby.” he leans down and kisses the top of your head.
“and you do?” you argue back.
“im different.”
“mhm.” you huff.
you knew he didn’t mean it in a bad way, you yourself told him to keep you away from certain things since you had to stay a certain weight for the modeling shoots this month.
you were annoyed, but appreciated he cared enough and paid attention. so you weren’t too upset at him.
the cashier gives both of you a slightly amused look while ringing everything up because you’ve been bickering the entire time.
then, you make it outside and sit together on the curb near the store sharing snacks while the city glows around you.
it feels peaceful, something you haven’t felt in days. you lean against his shoulder while eating a koala-shaped lollipop.
“you did good today by the way.” he says out of the blue.
“hm?” you say, popping the lollipop out your mouth.
“at your interview thingy.” he put his arm around you and you just nod in response.
“i could tell you was nervous earlier.”
“did you?” you laugh.
“yeah, i woulda stepped in but i knew i wasn’t allowed.”
“thanks gunner.” you say quietly.
“you’re famous now.” he jokes.
you pick your head up, “i’m not though.”
“cap, you got people fixing your hair every five seconds and you was on a billboard today.”
“lightwork compared to you.” you shrug.
he rolls his eyes, “trust me, you’re way better at it than me.” he says while almost finishing off the ice cream he had bought, “plus you look happier now.”
“only because you’re here.”
“want the last bite?” he gestures his ice cream towards you.
you instantly eat the rest off the stick, “mm, that’s actually so good.”
“yeah, i thought i wouldn’t like it, we gotta come here again sometime.”
he throws away his trash and carries the two bags, holding your hand in the other. he takes you around the city for about an hour, then back to your hotel.
you instantly fall asleep, sprawled out over the whole bed. you find him asleep on the chair the next morning and put a blanket over him.
inwhich! bf¡nettspend & reader get into an argument after his concert, to which they ignore eachother, until he gives in and writes her an apology letter.
metalking! semi-smut, i’m clearing my drafts and wanna save my juicy smuts for later loll 😭, i promise i write detailed ones!! ANYWAY, please like&reblog if you liked this!! & comment your thoughts! <3
it was a monday, an inconvenient day to have a concert, you had been telling your boyfriend all day. you also had to get to work the morning after, and his concerts always ended late.
“i promise i won’t do this again, thanks for supporting me, ma.” gunner said before running to stage.
you sighed to his friend who was sitting on the couch arm next to you. “i can’t stand when he does this shit.”
he lets out a chuckle, “yeah, i wouldn’t have come if i were you.”
“well good thing you’re not me.” you slouch on the couch more.
you two end up watching a movie on your macbook, an hour goes by and gunner comes backstage for a little break.
you weren’t laid up with his friend, but you were close, and you also jumped to stand up when you saw him come in. he gave his friend and look and scanned your body.
“hey baby.” you smile, adjusting your clothes, not realizing until after that doing so probably looked suspicious.
“what are y’all doin?” he says while downing a water bottle.
“nothing, just watching a movie.” you shrug while walking towards him.
“mhm.”
you go up to him, he’s all sweaty and smells a bit, but it’s your favorite scent. “i promise.” you whisper to him.
he backs up a bit, not letting you hug him, he didn’t like you hugging him when he was sweaty.
you furrow your eyebrows and insist, “come here.”
he gives in and pats your head, “i’ll be done soon babygirl.”
you two finished the movie and started playing cards against humanity. you didn’t realize gunner came back because you were too busy laughing at what his friend had put down.
you put down “charades was ruined for me forever when my mom acted out _” and he had put “masturbation.”
you were holding your stomach while laughing and telling him how childish he was, then he brushed against your arm for a split second, that was enough for gunner to say something.
“yo the fuck are y’all doin?” he wiped some sweat off his forehead.
“playing.” you smiled and held up a card.
“you forgot about me already?” he scoffs, you thought he was joking at first, but then realized it was one of his hissy fits.
“you jealous or what?” his friend laughed.
“yo shut the hell up.” he looks at you, “we’re leavin y/n, i’ll catch you later bro.”
with that you rushed out and went inside his car. it was silent for a while until he finally spoke up.
“so you just like him now or what?”
“what?” you turn your head immediately.
“you was laughin mad hard with him just now.” he says, you see his jaw tightening.
you blink, dumbfounded, “are you serious right now?”
“i’m just askin, why you gettin defensive.” he scoffs.
“you’re not asking though, you’re accusing me.”
he exhales loudly, glancing between you and the road, “i’m not tryna accuse you, i just seen,”
you cut him off, “you saw what? me laughing and having a normal conversation?”
“you were close.”
you stare him down, “i was literally just talking to him because you were busy.”
you thought he’d stop there, he usually did, but not this time.
“yeah but it ain’t look that way.”
you laugh, “oh my gosh. what way did it look?”
he didn’t answer right away, which made you feel some kinda way, “you don’t like him right?”
“no, i don’t.” you immediately say.
he looks at you like you’re lying.
“what? you don’t trust me?” you say, shifting, a little hurt.
“i do trust you,” he pauses, “it’s him i don’t trust.”
“that makes no sense gunner.” you say rolling your eyes.
he runs his hand over his face, “i just don’t like how he be ‘round you.”
“he’s your friend.”
“i know that.” he says while driving a bit faster.
“then why the hell are we arguing about this?” you sigh, and look out the window.
“just take me home.” you say quietly.
“you serious?”
“yes.”
he sighs, and the rest of the ride it quiet and awkward. you rolled the window down for the rest of the ride until he stopped in your driveway. you grabbed your things and slammed his door shut, which was his biggest pet peeve and you knew that.
the next few days go by, you don’t say anything to him and he doesn’t say anything to you. he didn’t even text you “what you doing” late at night or anything.
you notice him online more, everyone’s talking about his recent tour, and reposting clips. you ignore them for the most part, but you give in at some point. you can’t imagine how he can ignore you and not see you in days, but act so normal like nothing has happened.
you also see him posted up with models and strippers, which made you feel some kinda way. he would do that anyways, but you’d always be there to make sure nothing would actually happen.
you work at a clothing store in the city, so it’s always packed, you usually only took fifteen minute breaks, but today was a busy day so you had to make it quick.
“i’m taking my break!” you said loudly across the store, to your cowoker rhonda.
“see ya girl!” she said back.
you stepped out, pulling a cigarette out of your purse and lighting it. you played some quiet music in the background while leaning against the wall.
you miss when gunner would stop by during one of your breaks, mostly because he’d bring food or you’d smoke with him. you missed him in general though.
you sat and smoked through two songs and decided to head back in. once you opened the door rhonda came up to, handing you a piece of paper.
“your boyfriend stopped by and told me to give you this.” she smiled, “i told him you weren’t working today, since y’know.” she said referring to all the drama you had told her.
“thanks rhonda.” you smile and took the note, stuffing it in your pocket.
the rest of the day went by slow, you stocked up, folded clothes, and rung people up the whole day, then you had a sad sandwhich for dinner.
you completely forgot about the note until it was time to change into your pajamas. you heard something crinkle in your pocket and decided to open it.
it read, “dear my beautiful baby, i’m sorry for the way i reacted monday night. i was being a bad boyfriend. i know you don’t actually like him, and he’s just like that with every girl. but i love you and it made me jealous. i miss you, i miss your stupid good morning texts, your memes, your laugh, your scent, and your face. i know you wouldn’t respond to any message i sent, so i decided to write this out. please call me. love, gunner, your favorite. p.s you’re so hot when you’re angry. <3”
you smile to yourself and finished changing, then you immediately called him.
“y/n.”
“gunner.” you repeated.
“i missed your voice ma, lemme come over?” he asks.
“mm so you only apologized to fuck?” you joke.
“baby c’mon.”
“come over gunner, make it quick, i got work tomorrow morning.” you hang up and do a little dance out of excitement.
you heard a knock at your door after only ten minutes of waiting, you jumped up to get it. you were met with gunner, and his freshly shaved face.
“baby.” you kiss him.
he gives your butt a couple taps, letting you know to jump so he can carry you. you do so, and he shuts the door with his foot, taking you to your bedroom.
“mm gunner.” you moan into the kiss.
“missed me, huh?” he smiles.
“shut up.”
he lays you down, taking his shirt off. you slip off your own along with your sweats.
“so fucking pretty.” he mumbled while kissing your neck.
“right there gunner.” you moan, lifting your hips from the pleasure.
“shhh.” he chuckles into your neck.
he makes his way from your chest, to your underwear, leaving wet trails and a couple marks.
gunner kisses your pussy through your lace underwear making you bite your lip. you lightly push his face away to take it off.
his lips immediately go to your heat, his tongue licking you and going inside. he groans into it, making you moan and you grab a fist full of his hair.
“gunner, fuck i’m gonna come.” your hips buckle and your legs shake.
“damn not even five minutes?” he laughs, “you really missed me.”
you lightly kick his bare chest with your foot as he’s taking off his pants. he reaches into your nightstand for a condom and your foot stops him once again.
you nod no and he smirks, “really y/n? you sure?”
“yes gunner, please, hurry.” you say getting impatient.
“awe, so needy baby.”
he lines himself up, you look down and see him, rock hard, and big. he pushes himself in slowly, leaving you gasping already.
he takes his time with you at first, and goes faster after a couple minutes. he whispers in your ear how much he missed you and how good you feel.
“fuck.” you both say in sync as you reach your climax. he put his weight in top of you as you catch your breath.
“i love you y/n.” he said while caressing your hair.
“i love you too, gunner.”
he cleaned you up, tucked you in bed, and gave you a kiss goodnight while cuddling you.
in which! pre-debut gunner and reader have been talking for months, but neither one has asked eachother out yet.
metalking! short cute fluff i felt like writing lol, please like&reblog if you liked it, also comment your thoughts and submit requests!! tySm for all the support recently.
you and gunner have been “talking” for months now, almost a year, but neither of you ever actually says what it actually is. nobody needs confirmation anyway, people assume you’re together because he’s always somewhere around you and you’re always somewhere blurry in the background of his posts, or he’s wearing your hair ties around his wrist, or you’re stealing your hoodies and never giving them back, or both of you reposting songs with captions that are obviously about eachother.
every time he’s with his friends your name somehow comes up. either someone points out the way he’s smiling stupid at his phone or he accidentally says something that gives him away. he always acts nonchalant about it too, rolling his eyes and muttering, “y’all are weird,” while trying not to smile, but everyone can tell he’s just trying to hide it.
he’s at the studio with his friends, sitting back in a chair while unfinished music plays through the speakers. the room smells like weed, energy drinks, and cheap cologne. the led lights are giving everyone headaches, along with the loud music. he’s been sitting and waiting for you to text him back. he keeps checking his phone every thirty seconds.
he tries acting normal about it, but he’s getting jittery and catching an attitude with everyone.
one of his friends, tj, notices, “bros waiting on his lil girlfriend to text him back.” he mocks gunner.
“she’s not my girlfriend,” he says immediately.
everybody starts laughing while he just shakes his head and hides his face under his hoodie, trying to act unbothered.
then, his phone lights up with your text on his lock screen. instantly his whole expression changes without him even realizing.
- my power went out :( and i’m bored
gunner stares at it for a second, smiling to himself before he grabs his keys and stands up.
“where are you going?” someone asks.
“out.”
“that’s it?”
“see y’all, stay safe.”
they all start yelling and joking with him because they know exactly where he’s going, but he ignores them and leaves anyway.
about twenty minutes later, you hear tapping on your window.
you pull the curtain back and see gunner standing outside in an oversized hoodie with messy hair, holding a plastic bag full of gas station snacks and one of those giant big gulp slushies he always gets for you without asking what flavor you want because he already knows.
you open the window laughing, “why are you outside like a stray cat?”
“the front door’s boring,” he says, obviously joking.
he didn’t use the front door because your parents don’t like him, and if your father saw him he would beat the hell out of him.
the first week you met him he had shown up to your door, designer hoodie, ripped black jeans, and messy hair. your father saw him through the peephole and never let him in.
he then gave you an hour long talk about how “those kind of boys” are no good for you, and how you deserve it.
then gunner proceeds to climb through your window like it’s the most normal thing ever.
the power’s still out, so your room is dark except for a couple candles you found in the kitchen and the flashlight from his phone. the rain taps softly against the windows while you both sit on the floor wrapped in blankets, sharing snacks and doom scrolling together.
at one point he starts playing his unreleased music quietly from his phone.
your body heats up and you lift your head up from his shoulder. “you never let anybody hear this.”
“you’re not anybody.” he shrugs, avoiding eye contact.
your stomach flips, you knew how intimate he was trying to be. you look at him with a big smile.
he notices your expression and immediately gets embarrassed. “don’t make it weird.”
“i didn’t even say anything.”
“your face said enough.” he says, trying to make the situation less serious than it actually is.
you laugh and lean against him again, resting your head deeper on his shoulder. the second you do, he goes quiet.
his arm slowly wraps around your waist underneath the blanket, pulling you a little closer without even thinking about it. his thumb rubs small circles against your side while the music keeps playing quietly in the background.
he continues scrolling instagram, you set your phone down and looked at posts with him. you felt his heartbeat, it was fast and comforting.
after a while he mumbles, “you know i don’t do this for anybody, right?”
you look up at him, the darkness hiding your tinted cheeks, “awe, are you trying to say you love me.”
“alright nevermind then,” he mutters, trying to pull away.
you laugh and grab his sleeve before he can. “no, come back.”
he shakes his head, smiling to himself while he hides his face against your hair so you can’t see it, but you feel it.
hours pass without either of you noticing. you talk about everything and nothing at the same time. dumb stories from when you first met, where he thinks his music career will go, people you both hate, places you wanna go someday, and late night, “deep”, dumb questions.
eventually your voice starts getting softer and slower until you’re half asleep against him.
“you tired?” he asks quietly.
“mm.” you say, while trying to keep your eyes open.
“go to sleep then.”
you mumble something incoherent and curl closer into him instead. a few minutes later he looks down and realizes you fell asleep on him.
he freezes for a second like moving even a little might wake you up. meanwhile, his phone is nonstop buzzing from his friends asking where he disappeared to.
- bro are you alive
- studio tomorrow??
- this dude vanished over a girl 💔
he stares at the messages, then looks back down at you sleeping on his shoulder, he puts his phone on silent and stays exactly where he is, even when his leg starts going numb, because you look too comfortable to move.
you wake up the next morning alone in bed with at least five blankets over you. the morning light shines through, you hear your parents talking downstairs about random things.
you grab your phone to check the time, only to see a message from gunner.
- meet me @ da lake in an hour
- no pjs.
you smile at his last message, he was always so particular about not wearing pajamas out in public for some reason. you felt the same way, but not as strongly as he did.
you quickly got up, did your morning routine, and got dressed. throwing on a cute spring dress and heading downstairs for your weekend brunch tradition with your parents.
they were never big morning people on saturday mornings, so you all decided that you’d have breakfast at 12 pm every saturday. both your parents were excellent cooks which made it even more exciting. today, they made breakfast burritos, with french toast and fruit on the side.
you ate faster than usual while they interrogated you about “why you look so nice today.” you shrugged it off and said you were meet your friends for some skating down at the park.
this was a usual routine for you, without the dress of course, but they didn’t think about it too hard. you grabbed your skateboard and started to head out.
you lived about seven minutes from the lake which was nice, you got there on time, but you didn’t see gunner. you called out his name and called his phone, but no one answered.
you frowned to yourself thinking he stood you up or something. just as you were about to leave you hear your favorite love song that you told him about last night, behind you.
you turn around and see gunner holding a big bouquet of flowers, a sign, and a basket full of snacks and personal items. you see one of his closest friends, max, recording and holding a ginormous teddy bear.
your face instantly got stained with blush and a smile.
“y/n, can i be your boyfriend?” he stood there awkwardly, but still smiling.
max cheered you two on and eventually stopped recording, leaving you two alone.
you and gunner sat by the lake on the sand eating some of the snacks he had bought you. you were laying on his lap while he spoke.
“thank you for saying yes,” he pauses, “and also for believing me and my music.” he gave you a peck on your forehead, leaving your stomach fluttered.
Something Bad is going to happen to me, I don’t know but i feel it coming.”
Gunner was never the type to overthink until his love life before you shaped him to be that way. You were his prized possession someone he never wanted to lose ever to him you are the only girl he ever cared about so much which is why he’s in your shared bed stressing as he seen you and your costar being interviewed for a new movie coming out.
So sad might leave my nose running
He couldn’t help but feel jealousy run through his veins as he watched the way your costar was looking at you with eyes of admiration as you spoke about the character you are playing for the movie. He scrolled through twitter seeing tweets of fans shipping you both over the look that guy gave you, he got real pissed how were people not ashamed of posting stuff like this when you have a whole boyfriend. Everyone knew how possessive he is about you he was never ashamed of it, you were the prettiest girl he ever had and didn’t want to no one else to have you.
I just hope she don’t wanna leave me
You guys would fuck and after care that ends in endless reassurance every thrust he gave you telling you to remember who you belong to and who actually loves you. When he would lay on you he cuddle into you telling you not give up him and he only belongs to you only you my girl only you babe only you darling which ends you reassuring him so many times knowing you can’t blame him for knowing what happened to him before and all you could is give reassure him in times like these. He wasn’t fully convinced making him look through your phone while you slept after finding anything it gave him a relief but the bad thoughts lingered in his head not letting him sleep and overthink the night away.
Few days later
Something bad is going to happen to me
Again another situation with your costar when gunner visited you on set he couldn’t help seeing your costar getting touchy with you at times he didn’t need to making him give your costar a death stare even more when he seen you reject the touch showing signs of you bring uncomfortable. When shooting is done he can’t help but get upset and overthink again that you’ll leave him and give up on him like everyone has, but when you catch him you reassure him not wanting to fight about this as he tells you he not mad at you its him.
Why I feel this way I don’t know maybe I think of her so much it drives me crazy
When you quickly had a important phone call gunner sees your costar alone going to him secretly threatening him to stop flirting with you that you were his girl and only his and how he wasn’t going to let him attempt to steal you. But as your costar laughed in his face not knowing how he gets about you he punched him in his shit giving him a bloody nose and again punched again for making him feel this way giving him a bruised eye “ think again when touching my girl dickhead” he says wiping his hand to get rid of the blood turning around to leave but that didn’t give him satisfaction so he turned around to go back for a round two kicking him in his stomach grabbing that boys hair “ and never again try to ruin my relationship with my woman unless you ready to die cause i don’t play when it comes to her” he says letting him go going to find you before you go looking for him.
I just hope she don’t want her to leave me
As you both leave you guys smoke making him more vulnerable to the situation making him telling you the overthinking and how he really feels making you reassure him once again more and telling him you’ll never leave him, never give up on him, and you only belong to him. Making gunner feel more secure it was never he never trusts you it just he hates when guys will try to flirt with you thinking you’ll leave him for them, but sometimes he catches himself overthinking. After a night of you guys fucking out of passionate and reassurance he feels more better letting it out on you but as you made sure he slept peacefully and gave him constant reassurance he felt more secured of you both making him give you small kisses as thank you even whispering sweet things like “ I love you ma never forget that” “ you are angel im so lucky to have you” and “ I can’t help it you are so beautiful I hate when people look at you how i do”
What if she fine It’s my mind thats wrong and I just let the bed thoughts linger for far too long
“ nah i was def tripping” he tells his friends while they all smoked blunts talking about the situation “ he thought he stand a chance against me” he boosts his own ego as his friends agreed unknowing how bad it really affected him the past few days as he goes on he realizes he just let the bad thoughts linger for far too long. “ nah ion think your girl would do that to you she love you” one of his friends says reassuring him that you are anything but a cheater “ i know but you know how it is after awhile you just overthink.” He shrugs it off not caring anymore about your coworker.
Don’t you give up on me I only belong with you and only you, babe
As he got home he was greeted by you hugging him hard and blabbering about how your day went and what you cooked for making him smile realizing no one will ever really make you stop loving him and he is where he exactly wants to be at.
Only you, my girl only you, babe only you, darling
in which! nettspend and reader have a messy breakup after he cheated and relapses, he then dyes his hair her favorite color, only for her to beat him at his own game.
metalking! wait i kinda teared up making this. also he looks sooo yummy omg. creds to @romansbbg for making me think of writing this. please like&reblog, also should i make this into a series??? lmk!!
“you didn’t mean it, my ass!” you yelled at your now, ex boyfriend.
“chill y/n. i was with my bros and we was just messing around.” he said, trying to defend himself.
“are you high?” you put his phone down and get a good look at him.
“you trippin.” gunner said while avoiding eye contact.
“it better be fucking weed and nothing else gunner!” you said while continuing to yell at him.
he had promised you he would get clean and to your knowledge he had been clean for two months, from heavy drugs.
he scratched his eye, “ma i promise it’s jus weed i smoked.”
“bullshit.” you sighed realizing you can’t help him anymore. “just get your shit and go.”
you’ve had plenty of arguments before, but it never ended like this. it would usually end with you crying and him apologizing, him buying you a gift, or you two having sex.
gunner laughed not believing you, “what? you serious bro? over some weed?”
“are you forgetting the fact you cheated on me?” you take another look at him, he seems to be in another world, “fuck this! take your shit now and leave! we’re over gunner.”
you didn’t give him time to respond, not that he would do it fast enough anyway, he had been slurring his words and speaking in fragments.
-
everything had happened so fast, you completely had forgotten mid-argument that you were supposed to go to rolling loud with him.
it’s been a week since the incident happened, you don’t know if he’s tried to contact you because you blocked him on everything, even on pinterest and roblox.
which your bestfriend told you was too far, but knowing him he’d definitely try to text you on either of those if there was no other option.
he had texted a couple of your close and shared friends asking about you though. you only told your bestfriend about everything that happened so far. she was over at your place trying to make you feel better about the whole situation.
“so what all did he tell her?” kalle asked you, opening and passing you a blue buzzball.
“he just said shit like “let’s link”, asked if she was down to fuck,” you pause midway, tapping on your buzzball, “i dunno. it kinda hurt more because i know he lied about staying clean from everything.”
“shit really? when did he relapse?”
you shrug, “not sure if he was ever clean.” you can feel the knot in your throat growing tighter.
“it’s okay y/n, i love you and i’m here for you, he’s an embarrassing asshole. i mean he rather pay a hoe to fuck than realize what he has in front of him.” she brushes her leg against yours.
you smile and take a long sip of your drink, “i completely forgot rolling loud is today.”
“damn me too, the setlist looked pretty good, apart from y’know.”
you give her a quick, fake smile, “he really wanted me there, i feel like i did something wrong.”
“girl no. you didn’t do shit wrong, come on let’s forget it, put on a movie i’ll get some more drinks.”
you loved kalle for being like this, you’ve known her since junior high and she was always able to do the right thing when you needed to take your mind off something.
you two were a couple movies and drinks in when she let out a soft gasp. you turned over instantly, moving up to take a look at her phone since you were laying on her.
“what!?”
she snatched her phone away, “nothing keep watching.”
“show me.” you insisted.
after going back and forth for a little she gave in, passing you the phone. you expected to see her texting her boyfriend something intimate, or a celebrity getting into a controversy.
instead, you saw your ex, gunner with red hair. your favorite color. you had talked about it being your favorite color since the day you met him.
all your gifts on your birthday were red themed, your room had red all over it, your clothes were practically all red, your car was red, and you had a little red tattoo in honor of your bunny that passed away.
you got flashbacks to a conversation you two were having a week ago.
-
“dude i wanna dye my hair red so bad, i just feel like it wouldn’t fit me.” you were sprawled onto his chest as he scrolled his phone.
“baby it’d look great on you, maybe make you even more sexy,” he put his phone down, “if that’s even possible.”
“shut uppp.” you giggled into his bicep.
“but no bullshit it would.” he took a pause, brushing through your hair with his fingers, “maybe you should wait a little and we can do it together.”
“i like that idea, but i love your hair now.” you pout, lifting your head up and smothering his hair with it.
“mm you’re too cute ma.” he said, lifting you up and placing you on your back.
-
you snap back into reality, trying to tune back into whatever kalle was saying.
“are you listening?”
you look at her doe-eyed, “i miss the sex.” you say, leaning your head onto her shoulder.
“i know babes, we’ll find you someone even better i promise you.”
“he was so perfect.” you sighed again.
“baby it’ll be okay, this is what he wants, don’t give in. he knows it’s your favorite color,” she rose her voice getting more mad than you, “i mean for fucks sake, who doesn’t know red is your favorite color? and didn’t you ask him if you should dye your hair?”
you slowly nod, “what an asshole.”
“come here.” she pulled you into a hug, you both dozed off soon after.
-
the next morning you woke up before kalle. you got up quietly off the couch and went straight to the restroom. you brushed your teeth and tided your hair.
you reached for your phone, opening twitter.
gunner flooded your twitter feed, mostly because you’d only post and like stuff about him, but you didn’t expect it to be this bad.
everyone was raving about his new hair and where you were. you saw the songs he performed, seeing “nothing like uuu.”
you knew it was a bad idea, but you clicked on the clip of him performing it. he made it for you, he told you he had met so many other girls, but none were like you. how romantic.
you instantly teared up, regretting what had happened. you debated whether you should text him or not, your finger hovering over the “unblock” button, until kalle came into the restroom.
“y/n?” she groaned.
you instantly turned your phone off, opening the door for her and wiping your tears like nothing at happened. you let her use the restroom and waited outside on the couch.
you saved the video to your phone and rewatched it at least hundred times, waiting for her to come out.
“breakfast?” she stretched.
you nodded no, “kinda wanna buy the hair dye.” you gave her a look, wanting to make sure it wasn’t an impulsive, bad idea.
“even better idea.” she smirked while slipping her shoes on.
-
yourusername: blue, i like the feeling of it.
liked by, 2hollis, yunglean2001, rommulas, and 352k others
limited comments
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THIS IS BASED OFF OF AN INTERVIEW WHERE HE CLAIMED BLUE WAS HIS FAVORITE COLOR BECAUSE HE “LIKES THE FEELING OF IT.” !!!!!!!
THIS picture of him actually does something to me.
