#no kill run

[gingerrhd]

Au where mikol doesn't kill Evan/jus didn't learn anything and is now stuck working the prize counter with cutest boi blond moron

[we-are-a-dragon]

DM: If worst came to worst, you could have fought your way out. The dragon is a level 15 solo.

Tati (playing Seraph): We'd lose the round if we killed anything.

DM: If it was that or die, though.

Tati: We'd still have to deal with the rest of his horde.

DM: True. The dragonborn commander is level 26.

Tati: Oh shit, he could take the dragon.

DM: Nah, he's not a solo. *checks stats* Actually... oh shit. His AC, hit modifier... the dragon hits him on a natural 20 and he misses it on a natural 1.

Tati: Oh shit. He's gonna kill it and take over its empire. I bet the other dragonborn would back him.

DM: His fire resistance is higher than the max damage on its breath attack. They have the same fly speed! *hands over mouth*

Tati: That dragon's days are numbered and the number is not high.

[we-are-a-dragon]

DM: There's not a banquet for dinner today, just a refined affair with Duke Farlaing and whichever of the adventuring parties attend. After you've eaten everyone adjourns to the ballroom where the nobles return for the announcement of Round Two. Farlaing explains that each party will be teleported to a dangerous location and must escape without killing anything. Since you won the first round, you get to choose which location you will travel to, while the other parties will be randomized. Your choices are: a necromancer temple, a gnoll war camp, a royal bedchamber, a dragon's lair, a lich's tomb, or a wizard's tower. You can assume none of these locations are friendly.

Kjell (half-elf barbarian): *excited* Let's go to the dragon's lair.

Godric (fairy warlock): No way, that's the most dangerous!

Thaddeus (khajiit paladin): I reckon the palace.

Billie (gnome ardent): How would we explain that?

Seraph (siren sorcerer): What about the necromancer temple?

Thaddeus: I'd want to kill them, can't do that.

Godric: Look, they're all going to be difficult.

Thaddeus: Let's put it to a blind vote.

DM: *reads slips* You all voted dragon.

Billie: I hate us.

[we-are-a-dragon]

DM: So, the rules for Round Two. You will be teleported into the most dangerous or difficult to escape part of your location, and your only task is to escape without killing anything. You may injure as long as you don't kill, and you may be detected though it would help not to be. All good?

Party: Yes.

DM: Great. Now, I don't love Stealth encounters, because the entire thing can be ruined by a single bad roll. So we're going to play a mini-game! *places Jenga set on table*

Tati (playing Seraph): Nooo!

Andy (playing Una): Yesss!

[we-are-a-dragon]

DM: Once the main doors are opened, you see there is a short corridor, with grass and blue sky beyond. The dragonborn and kobold guards stand back to let you pass.

Tati (playing Seraph): I telepath to everyone. -Walk slowly. Do not run.-

DM: I need everyone to make a final Bluff check to maintain your composure as you leave.

Hamish (playing Thaddeus): Damn you.

Tati: 30.

Adam (playing Billie): 25.

Hamish: Ooh! 19.

Marijn (playing Godric): 21.

M (playing Kjell): 23.

Andy (playing Una): 15.

Noelani (playing Ben): ...11.

DM: Hamish, Andy, one Jenga block each. Noelani, two.

Party: *bated breath*

Hamish, Andy, Noelani: *extremely shaky Jenga*

DM: ...And you're free. The doors close behind you.

Party: *screaming*

[we-are-a-dragon]

DM: With all teams now returned, Duke Farlaing quickly appears with his gaggle of twittering, excited nobles. He goes through the placings for the round; coming last are Servants of the Sun. "Sorry Destrian, zombies did count as kills for this challenge, so your body count is twelve." Mirror snarls.

Tati (playing Seraph): I can't help laughing.

Adam (playing Billie): I don't even try to help it.

DM: Mirror seethes, shooting Destrian disgusted looks. Farlaing continues, "Galwyn is next, with one kill, pity about that. Since everyone else succeeded in escaping without killing anything, we go to times, so we have TTC A, TTC B and then tied for first this round are The Craftsmen and Heron's Fall."

Marijn (playing Godric): I clap as loud as my fairy hands can manage.

[we-are-a-dragon]

Party recap:

Following their triumph in the arena which placed them in first place in Duke Farlaing's tournament, Travelling Trauma Centre were approached at the celebratory banquet that evening by a Captain Bird Vethiver, leader of the witch hunters terrorizing Suda, who publically offered them a contract. Managing to turn him away for the moment, they wrapped up the party with a few more small interactions. The next day was spent in a rare bubble of calm, before Round Two of the tournament was announced in the evening, where it was revealed TTC would have to escape from a dragon's lair - without killing anything.

[we-are-a-dragon]

Hamish (playing Thaddeus): How did the other teams go with their escapes?

DM: The Craftsmen just speedran the wizard's tower.

Hamish: Oh yeah, it'd be like an average day for them.

DM: Basically. Heron's Fall had sheer dumb luck - they didn't run into a single enemy on their way out of the necromancer temple. TTC B were in the royal bedchamber - they jumped out the window and Damaris cast feather fall, then they waited for the guards to pass and climbed the wall.

Adam (playing Billie): I ask Galwyn how he ended up killing someone. He was in the gnoll war camp, right?

DM: He sighs and hesitates, realises everyone is listening in. "I slipped out the war tent, and easily snuck most of the way through the camp. I was almost out when a guard fell off a rampart practically on top of me - next thing I knew, my arm was through his chest."

Party: ...

Tati (playing Seraph): I take a step back.