The struggle of having "hot" parents
An 18-year-old Zephyr was hanging out with her friends by the statue of her grandfather, Stoick the Vast. Each of the girls were talking about Berk's recent history, or rather the years of the dragon riders.
Many people would think having parents that had such feats as Hiccup and Astrid Haddock did would bring a lot of pressure and an inferiority complex, but not Zephyr. If anything, she was proud to have such awesome parents as hers.
Seriously! Her mother was the best warrior Berk had ever seen, going up against giant burly vikings with ease, being second only to her Grandfather Stoick, and that was only because her mom didn't fight him out of respect.
And her father was the brightest Viking of the barbaric archipelago, using his mind to defeat powerful foes and overcome overwhelming odds, making a sword of fire and being able to fly without a dragon!
One of her friends, Bodil, suddenly shivered when a cold gust of wind brushed past them. "Hey, mind if we go inside. It's getting cold."
"Sure. Let's go to my house." Zephyr offered and the group of teens made for her house.
So yeah, Zephyr truly loved her parents and was proud to be their child. But there was just one issue...
"Soooo... will your dad be home?" Alma, another one of Zephyr's friends, tried to casually ask, but her sly and hopeful tone betrayed her.
Zephyr stopped in her tracks and deadpanned at the girl. "Seriously?"
"I'm just asking because... I... don't want to disturb him?" Alma weakly defended.
"Oh yeah, you'll totally be disappointed to see him." Every time. Every. Single. TIME! Many women apparently had the hots for her dad, both his generation and her generation, and her friends were no exception. They'd either freeze up, become overly awkward, try to get his attention or act flirtatious, sometimes it was all of the above.
And the funny thing, something Zephyr didn't know whether was a good or bad thing, was that her dad was completely oblivious to it.
Once some girl baked something for her dad, brought to the house and everything. From her stance, how she offered to bake some more if he wished, it was clear she was shooting her shot. And dad's reaction once the door was close? "...What a nice young lady."
And her mother, who could see through the compliments and gifts, would only smile or laugh it off. Apparently her father wasn't one for subtly or ques, seeing as she had kissed him multiple times before they got together and he never imagined her mother was in love with him.
But seriously! It was only gross! That was her dad! You can use 'cool', 'awesome', 'brave' or 'smart' to describe him, but hot? That was not a word she wanted associated with her father.
Ever since he understood his warrior lineage, Nuffink wanted nothing more than to be the greatest warrior of Berk, along with his mom and Grandpa Stoick. Even wanting to achieve the same feat as Grandpa Stoick did in breaking a rock in two with only his head.
(Nuffink didn't see why mom was annoyed with grunkle Gobber when he told him that story, it sounded so cool!)
So he would constantly train, with whatever weapon felt the best (twin short swords sounded cool, maybe even a wrist sword) and with his mom. Maybe he was a momma's boy, but who wouldn't wish to have such a cool, badass warrior for a mother?
And when his mom became the teacher for the next generation of fighters, he was the first in line to sign up, and aimed to be the best student.
Unfortunately, there were some other eager young men who wanted to learn under his mom. But not for the right reasons.
"Man, I can't wait to do some hand-to-hand with miss Astrid."
"I know how to make her sweat, and not just in a fight."
"Think I'll be able to get some private lessons?"
Nuffink normally would have broken some Jaws and knocked some teeth loose after hearing the other boys talk in such a way about his mother, not only was it disrespectful to him, but to his mother, who didn't deserve to be talked in such a way, and to his father, who these morons acted like wasn't worthy of her.
But Nuffink knew that what was to come would be so much more satisfying and hilarious.
See, these horny idiots didn't know how strict Astrid Haddock got when it came time to training. Outside of it? She was kind, nurturing and loving to Nuffink, but during training? It wasn't 'mom', instead it was 'Ma'am', even to him.
"Alright, listen up!" Mom finally made it into the training arena, gaining the attention of all participants. "I want you to get one thing. I bet you all think you're already the best fighter here, that you'll breeze past this, but I plan on crushing that delusion, crushing that arrogance and crushing that enthusiasm. Because if that enthusiasm can be so easily destroyed, then it was too weak for me to mould into a true warrior. If you don't leave here sore, then I consider that a session wasted. Is that understood?"
Nuffink was the only one to answer with the expected "Yes, ma'am!" With his chest puffed out and back straight, while the others gave half hearted affirmations.
Astrid Haddock narrowed her eyes dangerously and took out her axe before throwing it at the group, missing one boy by just a hair, which made them all straighten up in sudden fear.
Nuffink snorted. Didn't these idiots get it? She had intentionally missed. If she wanted that throw to kill someone, there would be one less person on New Berk.
"Alright. We'll be focusing on hand-to-hand combat. Because if you can't even throw a decent punch, then I doubt you'll be able to a sword correctly. Any volunteers?"
One arrogant asshole, by the name of Ivar, confidently strode up to mom with a leer on his face, flexing his muscles 'subtly'. "Don't worry, miss Hofferson, I'm sure a session with me will leave you sore, in a good way." He said in an oily tone.
Mom simply raised an unimpressed brow at him and silently got into a fighting stance, which Ivar pathetically copied, pathetic in the sense that it was completely open and a poor replication of his mother's stance.
Ivar suddenly threw a jab, (too slow, too wide and leaving his vital points open to attack, Nuffink analysed) to which Astrid simply parried and quickly threw a powerful punch into his exposed sternum, making the teen lose both his air and confidence. As he bent forward, struggling to breathe, Astrid was quick to follow up with a elbow uppercut to his chin, forcing his chin to point up towards the sky, as Astrid spun around and used her hand to chop the side of his neck, effortlessly taking him down in only three strikes and in seemingly just a blink of an eye.
As Ivar rolled on the ground, gasping for air, the other students suddenly grew a new found level of fear for their instructor.
"Anyone notice where he went wrong?" Astrid questioned, unconcerned for Ivar.
Nuffink answered, not raising his hand as his mom preferred, "He left himself exposed with a poor stance, especially after throwing a punch that was too wide."
Astrid nodded with a small smile. "Correct, Haddock."
Nuffink allowed a smile to grow on his face. Even if his peers acted to shamelessly towards his mother, he wouldn't have her any other way. And being able to have front row seats to his mother decimating those same idiots wasn't a bad trade.