Diary Entry
No. 3
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Im a wholehearted believer that people do say goodbye in the afterlife in different forms.
One form i grow so fond of and desperate to seek sometimes is the final goodbye in a dream. Those goodbyes that feel like "see you later" and not a realization that this is it...this is the end.
- when i lost my childhood best friend about four years ago, we hadnt spoken in about a year before that due to some petty bullshit on his behalf. I felt bad about it too, hurt and unsure how to even fix it. But then life ended so abuptly for him. A car wreck took him from his wife and kids. I went from being so used to us achieving milestones together our entire childhood and into adulthood, to feeling that disturbing reality that one's path walked beside me has ended its paved way and turned into dirt and ash. Someone like my classmates or people my age i grew up with are all walking their own paths alongside mine and we all have this journey of life, but when i hear they die, i can practically physically see the path end. Its heart wrenching.
Two nights after he passed, i had a dream. It wasnt like any others, i dont socialize or go to parties but in my dream i was at a house party, i couldnt recognize the house or backyard. I was standing at a pop up table full of snacks and was on the serving side of it rather than the busy side where everyone was grabbing. I was confused but didnt have much of a reaction. Then i heard him calling like he had been looking for me. I look up and saw him push through the crowd and say "HEY man! Ive been looking all over for you! So glad i found you! I miss you!" and he grabbed the back of my head and bumped noggins with me and he left... Back wading through the crowd. Like he was coming back to have a chat but he never did.
That was my goodbye.
Noggin, duuuude.
Noggin...
🌱🚬
