#poor clark

[saltysmutslut]

Bruce texting Clark: Hey Honey, come over. I’m in the shower 😉 😘

Clark speeds over

Bruce: So the hot water heater broke and I need warm water

Clark: …

[frownyalfred]

actually alarmed at how early and ahead of the curve I was on my “Clark has to deny harem allegations” kick in the CRU, when I saw the Superman movie I was cracking up in the theater. I’ve been making that man attempt to duck the harem allegations for YEARS.

[sparrows4bats]

It occurred to me that my Demisexual Damian post from Jons POV is so funny, Jon Kent is a simp.

So Jon knows Damian is on the ace spectrum before they even start dating. He had mentioned it when they were younger. How he views people and relationships differently and how he doesn't mind the idea of sex at all, but he could never sleep with someone he doesn't have a deep emotional connection to. That even imagining it feels odd.

That's more than fine with him because Damian likes romantic gestures, kisses, and cuddles, but Jon very carefully doesn't bring up sex.

He doesn't need it, just being able to even touch Damian is so incredible that Jon pinches himself every so often to make sure he hasn't been trapped in an illusion that gives him everything he ever wanted.

(But God, He wants to see how Damian looks when he feels so good he can't hide it. Jon wants to see what makes Damian tick and use it until he begs for more.)

It doesn't help that he has the most attractive boyfriend in the universe. Sometimes, when Damian trains, he is so graceful and flexible that Jon needs a second to remember how to breathe again and fly to the Artic for a few minutes.

But he was raised to be a gentleman, and what he has with Damian will always be so much more than sex. So he happily waits, and he falls in love a little more every day.

Then Damian demands sex out of nowhere. Jon is wrapped in a towel after a fight, and Damian is in those tiny shorts and Jons old hoodie.

Jon isn't sure he isn't dreaming, but when Damian asks again. 'Preferably now' It's a miracle he doesn't fall to his knees and beg.

He kisses Damian so hard and says yes so fast he is glad he didn't accidentally use his powers, but when Damian looks up at him with big green eyes and asks, 'Now?' Jon has to drag them over to the bed before they end up having sex for the first time on the floor.

(Jon was right, Damian is so otherworldly when he loses control in his pleasure that he never wants to look at anything else. Never wants to do anything else but stay there with Damian underneath him.)

Afterwards, when he is staring at Damian, who is out of breath, gorgeous with messy hair, and hickes on his neck. Jon realises, not for the first time, how lucky he is to have this amazing person in his life. He would give Damian world if he asked.

After their first, second, and third times that night, It's like the dam broke.

Jon can't keep his hands to himself. Thank God Damian is just as bad, if not worse. Once he realises the effect he has on Jon, he exploits it mercilessly. (Jon loves it)

But it does lead to a few awkward moments, like his Dad asking him to please keep it down. (Super Hearing is a bitch but his Dad does stop checking on him as often) And that time Dick catches them almost going at it on his couch.

It all ends well enough, though. He convinces Damian to marry him as soon as possible. (The honeymoon is amazing.)

[sisaloofafump]

Wrong.

[ckducky]

Lois Vs The Whip

[smutslutonao3]

Clark: Hey, I’m getting in the shower. Wanna help me out?

Bruce: ...Have you never taken a shower before? Is this a Kryptonian thing? Hmm can I run some tests?

Clark: Bruce… I was trying to flirt

Bruce: Oh…

Bruce: I think your flirting skills could use some work

[babygirlcokewhore]

⌗ TEDDY BEAR -- CLARK KENT ❦ mature themes

pairing: clark kent x female reader

warning: major character death, mean! abusive! reader, lex's niece! reader, luthor! reader, language

word count: 2.9k+

narration: your mission was simple - befriend kal-el, earn his trust, then kill him. but what happens when you fall in love with man of steel? (im shit at this)

author's note: now once again, i've written this all in one go, im sleep deprived and this isnt proofread. yk the drill. those who saw my poll will know this is based off of 'teddy bear' by melanie martinez. im quite proud of this so i hope you like x

--- now playing: teddy bear by melanie martinez

--- masterlist ༝༚༝༚

‘stitched you up, put you together with cotton and feather’

the day you met clark might have been the best day of your life. as a woman in your early twenties - navigating both a new city and new job independently was tough. he had showed up into your life like a glimmer of light in an underground tunnel. meeting him weeks into your journalism position at the daily planet, you found yourself enchanted by the awkward quirk of his smile and the nervous glint of his eyes. you confided in him, the two of you tumbling through the line of friendship immediately.

‘gave you love, put my heart inside you - oh, what could i do?’

you remember it like it was yesterday – the day clark asked you to be his girlfriend. he had been less than himself the whole day, declining your calls, brushing you off – even refusing to help edit your drafts. lois couldn’t get away quick enough from your endless rants, “i don’t know what i’ve done wrong! he was fine yesterday.” your eyes clouding with an air of despair as you thought through your last interactions with him – head racing with all the possible ways you could have fucked up.

deciding to take matters into your own hands, you rose from your simmering hole of self-deprecation, strutting over to his table guns ablaze and demanding answers. “kent, i’m not sure what crawled up your ass today – but i’m over it. man up and tell me why the fuck you won’t even talk to me.” blue eyes widened at your towering figure at the edge of his desk, wonder and admiration painting his expression. he was entirely enamoured with you. clark’s dark lashes fluttered as he took you in, your chest heaving and lipstick painted bottom lip quivering with embarrassment. a large proportion of the daily planet unabashedly staring at the encounter now.

a shaky intake of breath, a nervous grin on his lips and then – “will you be my girlfriend?”

‘when you started talking in your sleep, saying things you'd do to me – i didn't care, i wasn't scared’

it wasn’t your fault really, you told clark you did not want to go. but what could you do, you were a supportive girlfriend and let yourself tail along to the work party he was so desperately set on going to. multiple body shots and numerous dry martini’s later, you found yourself slumped in the sofa of your boyfriend’s quaint midtown metropolis apartment – your head elevated with your favourite throw pillow and his soft hands wiping off your sweaty makeup off with a wet wipe.

you eyelashes fluttered, once, twice – eyes open now. you watched his expression unlock with even more adoration if humanely possible. and instead of your heart to respond with the expected reaction, disdain crowded your gaze, brows furrowing as you whispered –

“i am going to ruin you, baby.”

clark’s ministrations paused, the innocent bliss of his smile dropping as he stared at you – probably measuring the level of concern he needed to show at your unwarranted statement. in the end, he resorted to the soft shaking of his head – stroking your damp hair.

“let’s get you to bed, gorgeous.”

‘now I'm finding knives under the sheets, crumbled photographs of me - i'm in despair, should i be scared?’

the night clark told you he was superman was like any other in the six-month life span of your relationship.

easy. trusting. loving.

you had told him you were suspecting of him for a while, the earliest of your suspicions being when you had told him to warm up your pot noodles during movie night and he had come back almost immediately, pot noodles piping hot in a specific spot, and not a peep from the kitchen – not even the sound of the kettle warming up the water for it.

(you skipped over the obvious red glow you had seen in the crack of the door frame into the kitchen from the living room to ease his racing heart.)

so, as fate would have it – you took to the news of your boyfriend being a literal alien relatively easy. assuring him that you weren’t mad at all. it had its ‘perks’ as you put it, slyly nodding the bulge in his grey joggers – clark’s complexion reddening immediately as you smirked, leaning to place a peck on his overheating cheeks.

later that night after a few long hours of satiating your needs on clark’s cock, the two of you slept – your small frame tucked comfortable into his comically large body. the only sound being the melodic snores of the brunette behind you.

nearing the early hours of the new day, you stirred, desperately needing to pee. you untangled yourself from your boyfriend’s heavy hold, padding over to the bathroom as he whined, patting the bed in search of you.

clark’s eye lids cracked open, his eyes adjusting to the dark as he scanned the bed in search of you. after his ears registered the soft sound of you in the bathroom, he allowed himself to relax – your pillow now taking your place as he cuddled it, and in doing so, scattering a small collection of papers unto the floor.

he sluggishly sat up, stretching to grab the few rogue papers on the floor. switching on the lamp on the bedside table, he scanned through the writing in front of him. blue eyes widening with each word he read. “met clark kent...befriended...11/04” he whispered, knowing on his bottom lip as his vision clouded with unshed tears – he read on; ‘dating now..call lex at midnight tonight.’ his breathing picked up at the mention of his arch nemesis. how did you know him? was this a set up? a poorly thought through joke?

the door of the bathroom opened, the delicate sound of you sighing could be heard as you emerged – your white boy shorts low on your hips and riding up your thighs, one strap of its matching tank falling off your shoulder, you were the definition of ‘at peace’. clark on the other hand..

“what-what is this?” he turned over to look at you as you stopped in your tracks at sight of him with your notes in hand, expression darkened as the lamp cast a dangerous glow over his muscular frame.

acting quickly, you let the tension melt from your demeanour, calmly climbing into bed next to him. “nothing, don’t worry about it.” clark’s eyebrows rose up as he willed his heart to stop racing out of his chest. “d-don’t worry about it? wh-how do you know lex luthor?” he sputtered, eyes flitting around your calm expression, unable to believe the situation he was in.

“hun, everyone knows who lex luthor is.”

“you know very well what i mean.”

“clark…” you reached up to caress his face, his nostrils flaring as your fingers stroked his cheek, flinching away from you as hot tears rolled down his face in fast succession. looking down to the last sheet of paper he clutched like betrayal in his hands; he read out the last mocking line that was written. signed merely hours from then.

“just confessed, too easy – plan in action from tomorrow. meeting at five with luthor.”

his once kind, innocent eyes tainted with the pain and uncertainty of what your intentions were. you felt an unfamiliar tug of guilt in your heart as you softly collected the notes from him, setting them next to you before turning to face him – pulling his defenceless self into your chest, his body now heaving with sobs. you raked manicured hands through his dark curls, occasionally pressing kisses to his forehead.

“i would never hurt you.” one lie

“you can trust me.” second lie

“it’s okay, i love you baby.” was it a lie?

‘teddy bear, you were my teddy bear, you were comforting and quiet - how did love become so violent?’

your phone let out a shrill ringing as the two of you were cuddled up on the sofa, you let out a drawn out groan as you sat up, straddling his lap as you took the bothersome phone out of your back pocket. glancing at the lit-up screen, your disinterested expressing morphing to one of shock – you immediately clambered off his lap rushing to the bedroom, speaking in a hushed voice.

clark watched you leave, a damper now put on his mood as his mind raced with all sorts of ideas of why you left so quickly – obviously not wanting him to hear your conversations.

were you cheating on him? were you thinking of moving away? were you still in contact with lex?

the thought sent a chilling shiver down his spin as he sat upright, feet planted on the hardwood floor. not long after you had gone, you were heard emerging from the bedroom again, padding into the living room flopping down next to clark hastily.

“who was that?” rolling your eyes, you ran your hands down your face, sighing softly.

“clark i’m not doing this with you.” he turned to look at you, disbelief across his features upon hearing the detached resolve of your response.

mouth agape and breathing heavy, his eyelashes fluttered, slowly wetting with tears as they silently rolled down his face. he muttered the words he had dwelled on for months, dreading the day they would inevitably come tumbling out his mouth.

“a-are you cheating on me, y/n?”

you sluggishly pulled yourself up to stand in front of him, eyes cold as you held his face in a vice grip, your fingers pushing into the hollow of his cheeks. “clark. i’m only going to say this once, so listen to me. i am not cheating on you. i just have things that i need to get done without the wandering eyes of an insecure boyfriend.” you pulled his face closer to yours as you leant down to his level, sickeningly sweet breath entangled with his. “ya got it?” you quipped, eyes searching his as he cried in earnest now. he couldn’t believe it; it was like you changed overnight. this wasn’t his girlfriend, it couldn’t be. at least that is what he repeated to himself as you left the apartment, your phone clutched in your hand like a weapon and his head in his.

‘teddy bear, you were my teddy bear - everything was so sweet until you tried to kill me.’

“lex i don’t know about this..i think m-maybe its too soon-”

“he’s suspecting things! … no, he doesn’t think its you- lex come on, let’s wait this one ou-”

“i-fuck…whatever, fine.”

you cut the call off, staring through the windshield of your car as droplets of rain ricocheted of the screen. you were parked outside clark’s apartment building, one small duffel bag filled to the brim with relatively large shards of kryptonite. conveniently, clark was at work today and you had taken the day off to plan this ‘great gift to humanity’ as lex had so elegantly put it. turning your gaze to the third-floor window where you knew clark’s apartment was, your vision clouded with hot tears – racing thoughts betraying you with flashes of your ‘relationship’ – if you could even call it that.

when you agreed to partake in this stupid plan of your uncle’s you had believed you would be dealing with another egotistical ‘superhero’. your family had a legacy of dealing with so many of the same, so you expected nothing less. what you hadn’t expected was to encounter the purest, caring, loving man that you would ever meet. and as you thought of all the wrong choices that lead you into this mess, your sobs rang throughout your thin frame, hands coming up to hold your head in them as you cursed yourself and your feelings.

minutes past, the rain stopped and so did your tears. you climbed out of the driver’s seat, duffel bag in hand as well as your phone. the black hood of your tracksuit was pulled over your head as you trudged up the stairs to the apartment – resisting the easier option of the elevator as a punishment for the treacherous actions you were about to commit.

unlocking the door of clarks home, you took it in, solemn eyes watching the memories you made over the last year and a half replay in slow motion. kicking the door closed behind you and entering the bedroom in which you had some of the – if not the best sex of your life, you dropped the duffel on the floor, unzipping it to reveal the murderous weapon you would use to kill the love of your life.

the clock ticked on as you hid shards of the poisonous green around the bedroom, tears flowing down your face as you did so – the guilt eating at your heart. soon the time had come for you to finish what was long coming as your boyfriend texted you – alerting you of his arrival. you changed into an oversized t-shirt, its hem barely grazing mid-thigh, fastening your hair into a ponytail as you got started up in the kitchen – intending on surprising him with his favourite foods – chicken soup and rhubarb pie.

“i’m home!” his comforting voice called out, your heart squeezing in your chest as you placed steaming bowls of chicken soup on the table – the pie baking in the oven.

“in the kitchen, babe!” you responded, forcing a soft smile unto your face although your insides withered as the minutes passed. you watched him waddle into the kitchen, his glassed perched on his nose – crooked as always – as an ecstatic smile spread across his face at the sight of the food on the table and the girl of his dreams stood next to it.

“all this for me?” he squeaked, placing his blazer on the back of a chair before scooping you up into his arms, dwarfing you completely. you squealed, wrapping your arms around his neck as he set you back down – giving you a peck. “mhm!” you hummed, willing the dark void in your chest to go away.

blue eyes looked deep into your eyes, glinting fondly with something dangerously akin to love before stealing another kiss from your lips. the two of you sat down and ate – clark immediately gushing about the quality of the meal, calling his mother halfway through the dinner to tell her all about it. your heart swelling with how highly both him and his ma spoke of you while you were there.

after that hearty meal, you presented him with the rhubarb pie, giggling at the little twirl he did at the sight of it. you had a comically small slice – unable to keep anything down with the anxiety of the task at hand. he on the other hand, scoffed it down, reaching for seconds while you wistfully gazed at him – committing this moment to memory.

soon he was all done, and being the gentleman he is, washed the dishes while telling you about the rather eventful day he had. clark walked over to you, the innocence of pure adoration present in his gaze as he leant down to kiss you. you sighed into the kiss, allowing him to walk you backwards into the wall, licking into the warm of his mouth and relishing his whines as you did so.

“bedroom..p-please-”, he murmured against your lips, hands pulling you closer to him by your hips. you disconnected yourself from his mouth, eyes tearing up as you looked deep into his, your fingers stroking the slight stubble of his chin, the plumpness of his lip, the soft curl of his hair. a tear ran down your cheek as you cursed yourself – knowing you would never find a love like him again.

“wh-what’s wrong? did i do something?” clark whispers, alarm evident in his tone. “no it’s nothing.. you’re- i- i’m just really happy.”

a smile of awe spread across clarks lips as he kissed you again, allowing you to push him backwards in the direction of the bedroom. as the door gave way to clark’s kick, he let out a soft gasp against your lips as you push him to the middle of the room, tears rolling down your face as you watched him crumble to the floor, groaning in agony.

he glanced up at you, eyes alarmed and brows furrowed in a torturous mix of pain and confusion as you made no movement to help him. “wh-what’s going on?”

you backed up against the wall, sliding down as you watching him, your body racking with your wailing and your bare arms wrapping around your body – clark writhing in pain, already switching in and out of consciousness.

“y/n- ple- please d-don’t do this-”, he pleaded, his beautiful blue eyes rolling into his head, letting out a small gasp at the sight, your hand now clasping against your mouth in an attempt to hold yourself together.

you shut your eyes, willing it all to go away, for it to be a dream and you would wake up – warm, tucked into the sheets as clark big spooned you from behind.

silence.

you cracked your eyes open adjusting to the dim lighting. clark lay in front of you motionless. you crawled over to him feeling him once more as the tears flowed in earnest now – clark was a man that always ran warm. it was something you loved about him, his warmth.

the warmth of his smile, the warmth of his words, the warmth of his body.

he was now cold.

“i love you, clark”

--- taglist: @minimeringue

[blarfkey]

Chapter 4  is up!

Fandom: Smallville, Superman - All Media Types Rating: Explicit  Relationships: Clark Kent/Lex Luthor   Additional Tags: Dubious Consent, Captivity, Depressed Clark Kent, Suicidal Thoughts, being at the mercy of your enemy, Enemy to Caretaker, Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Clark Kent's Gay Awakening, Season/Series 06

In exchange for breaking up with Lana, leaving Smallville for good, and dismantling Level 33.1, Clark offers Lex the ultimate bargain: himself, on a platter. Lex can have anything: the truth, the secrets, Clark's body for torturous experiments.

But what Lex ends up taking for himself, Clark never expected, and it leaves them both reeling with the same question:

Is there still hope for both of them?

*Season Six AU -- diverges after Ep. 8 Static*Four