#bruce is oblivious

[smutslutonao3]

Clark: Hey, I’m getting in the shower. Wanna help me out?

Bruce: ...Have you never taken a shower before? Is this a Kryptonian thing? Hmm can I run some tests?

Clark: Bruce… I was trying to flirt

Bruce: Oh…

Bruce: I think your flirting skills could use some work

[numberonedukethomasapologist]

Bruce: Hey kids?

Fam: yeah?!

Bruce: Whats superbat?

*babs and dick immediately hoping in the elevator*

*Jason jumps out the window*

*Cass crawls under the couch*

*steph climbs on tims shoulders and pretends to be a coat hanging on the rack*

*Duke went invisible so quickly nobody is sure if he was there or not*

*Damian walked out the front door and is now rethinking life inside of a tree hole*

Bruce: wha-

Clark: IS IT TIME?!?

Bruce: what??

Clark: oh.. *slowly flies backwards out the window he crashed through*

[babybowlcuttimmy]

just random batkid things pt3

so you know how everyone says duke is the "normal" one. They are liars. Duke is infact not the normal one, he is the one who is in the principal's office the most, second only to Dick. Let's not forget who started the "we are robin" movement. Duke. It was Duke( I was just informed that's not true he was recruited into it, I still think he would start protests and stuff tho🫪). He literally does the day shift. Willingly. He is not normal, his dad is (I think, I should definitely check but I don't want to) literally a power hungry god. No, the difference between Duke and his siblings is he hides it better.

DICK and JASON fighting: I hate you! This is why you went to juvenile detention as a kid! This is why you were a street rat!

BRUCE groaning and rubbing temples: who did it?

DAMIAN: did what father?

BRUCE: starting the fight. Who did it?

DAMIAN: father. I assume you mean who coerced the heathen's to fight to the death?

BRUCE: yes damian. Which one of you did it?

JASON and DICK still fighting like cats in a corner: I was the better robin! I was the happy one! No you weren't, mister 'i was gonna be a murderer at 9' I was the robin is magic kid! Everyone liked me better!

TIM filming and watching with STEPH: oh, it's getting good. Yeah! Go for the hair!

STEPH cheering on: BITE! BITE! BITE!

CASS watching and enjoying her siblings being idiots: I think Jay is gonna win this one.

TIM: naw, he just got back from a run he's tired.

CASS: I'm still right though.

TIM sighing: I know.

DAMIAN: father it was Thomas.

BRUCE malfunctioning because his sweet flashlight baby duke would never: no, duke is my perfect angel. He never does anything wrong. Ever.

DAMIAN dumbfounded: father what?!

BRUCE thinking of his super sweet son duke: he would never do anything wrong or cause any problems ever.

DAMIAN blinks: father, are we thinking of the same person?

BRUCE sighing thinking his sweet baby boy duke: the only one, he is so sweet. Of course we are.

DAMIAN thinking about how duke kicked him fully off the couch this morning, rearranged his pencils so that they would be one off, and put his controllers/literally anything up high so that he had to climb to get them. All because Damian ate the last of dukes chips: no father. I do not think we are.

BRUCE still thinking about how proud he is of duke: he has come so far, he rarely gets in trouble at school, he fights fair. You all should learn from him.

DAMIAN deadpan: you remember how duke was in the principal's office YESTERDAY, because he started a protest IN the cafeteria, right?

BRUCE shaking his head fondly: he never uses his meta powers for bad, he never uses them as a crutch.

DAMIAN in a very disappointed voice: father. Last week Thomas was in a physical fight with a bully.

BRUCE:the bulky deserved it, if I say so.

DAMIAN baffled: BLIND father! The bully is BLIND!! The bully won't recover, said bulky is in the hospital!

BRUCE oblivious: hrn, don't be jealous damian. You should learn from Duke.

BRUCE walks away.

DAMIAN sputtering: what? No. He- he can't-

DUKE invisible egging JASON and DICK on he *was* the one who started the fight: Jason, Dick said he could beat you any day of the week. Are you gonna let that slide?

Fighting intensifies, DUKE walks over to Steph, Tim, and Cass.

DUKE: nice. I was getting bored.

DAMIAN *internal screaming*

[i-mean-its-practically-canon]

Bruce: Hey, Jay. Did you hear I'm a DILF?

Jason: What the- do you know what that means?

Bruce: Yep. It's on this shirt Cassandra got me for Father's Day.

The Shirt:

Jason: Where did you get that?

Cassandra: Facebook ad.

Jason: You're not allowed to buy things on Facebook anymore.

[sunaddicted]

Day Five: Space

For @superbatbigbang unofficial inktober prompt list

***

"Master Bruce"

"I've checked the time: I still have half an hour left before you drag me to bed" Bruce sighed, eyes focused on the reports slowly trickling in: a big trafficking ring had been torn down and it had taken more than just Batman and Robin's intervention to do so.

Nightwing's had been the first to arrive, typed up with Dick's usual simplicity that reminded Bruce of his school essays; Robin's had arrived second only because Damian had gotten home later, insisting on assisting him through the clean-up and the handover to the GCPD; Oracle's had just come in; Spoiler hadn't sent word yet.

He wouldn't be able to compile a dossier for Gordon until he had all the points of view, all the details, all the proofs - no matter that Alfred claimed he needed to get some rest, he had some necessary work to do.

"There was an earthquake in the Philippines"

Bruce frowned and switched one of his monitors to a newsagent site: someone from the League must have gotten there almost instantly, since none of his alarms had rung "A lot of dead" he commented, skimming through the headlines.

"Master Clark was the first responder" Alfred added, putting a mug of tea down by Bruce's elbow.

"It wasn't a criticism" just a fact.

"I know"

Bruce picked up the tea and took a sip, expecting Alfred to leave after having delivered his news but the man didn't seem to be done yet "What is it?"

"The loss of human lives always hits Master Clark the hardest"

"You think I should go and find him"

Alfred arched an eyebrow - Bruce always thought that it was a dignified version of a sarcastic duh that the older man was too British to actually voice "Partners usually comfort one another in difficult moments"

And while by then Clark had had come to terms with the fact that he couldn't save everyone, he still beat himself up over it - Bruce knew that it was one of the reasons why he loved the other man: he had never become desensitized to death, his heart wouldn't allow it "He hasn't come to the manor, has he?"

"He hasn't"

"Doesn't that mean he needs some time alone?"

Alfred sighed "He knew you had an important operation to take down"

"That's true"

"Shall I prepare the Batwing?"

Bruce glanced at the reports: if he took the Batwing, during the flight over to the Watchtower he would have enough time to read over them and organise them for Gordon - then he glanced at the numbers on the screen and grimaced as he once again took in the proportions of the disaster that now Artur and Mera were managing, being better equipped to deal with the tsunami that surely would soon follow "No, I'll teleport there"

"Excellent, Master Bruce"

The sheer satisfaction in the older man's voice almost was enough to make Bruce want to change his mind, but he realised that it really wasn't the time to be petty and squabble with Alfred as if he still was a teen - no, Clark was undoubtedly hurting and needed him to be close.

To remind him that he had done everything he could, even if the words never really helped.

Bruce finished his tea as he walked towards the teleporting arch - having one outside the controlled environment of the Hall of Justice technically was a breach of the security protocols Bruce himself had designed but he was only human and unlike Flash, he couldn't exactly reach the Hall of Justice in the blink of an eye and he couldn't always count on Cyborg to open a Boom Tube for him.

So, yes, breaking the rules was necessary in his case and he would glare at any other League's member who dared to fight him over it.

"I don't think I'll be back until tomorrow morning"

"The manor will stand in your absence, Master Bruce"

Of course it would: Alfred literally kept the place running.

Bruce stepped into the arch and he ignored the uncomfortable sensation at the bottom of his stomach, as if a hook was tugging at the depths of his body - leading him into the Watchtower by his innards; he shook the feeling away and stalked deeper into the familiar room, not sure about where Clark exactly was but letting his instinct take over - he knew the other man, he was confident he wouldn't take him long to find him. His steps echoed in the empty halls, strangely devoid of any activity: it seemed that they all were having an eventful night - unfortunately, some days were less peaceful than others and Bruce wasn't really looking forward to the reports that needed to be sorted.

"He's in the conference room"

Bruce didn't even try to repress the flick of annoyance as J'onn's voice resonated in his mind - the Martian would have been able to detect it anyway, no matter how hard he tried to hide the feeling "Thank you" he thought before he closed his mind, not needing to feel the connection to the other hero as he talked to Clark who, as predicated, was standing by the glass panels and looking out into space.

Looking at Earth.

Bruce joined his lover and wrapped up his arms around his waist, standing a little on his tiptoes so that he could hook his chin on Clark's shoulder. His suit smelled of damp earth and it was spotted with drying mud and dust that was probably getting all over his own suit, in dramatic relief on the dark fabric - Bruce didn't care much, really: the suit was a lighter, older one that he wore only to roam around the Watchtower.

Clark held his breath only for a heartbeat before he let the tension drain from his body and he sagged a little against Bruce's back, knowing that the other man could support his weight "Hi"

"Hi" Bruce greeted back, fingers subtly starting to caress Clark's sternum in what he hoped to be a soothing manner.

"How did the operation go?"

"According to plan"

"Good" Clark nodded, reaching up to cover one of Bruce's hands with his own - grateful; he knew that the other man probably had plenty of things to do, that he hadn't been to bed yet, that coming to the Watchtower must have been the last thing on his mind... But he was there, standing behind him and emanating the sort of quiet that Clark could attune to in order to calm himself down.

"Go for a flight"

"Hmm?"

Bruce pointed to the darkness on the other side of the glass "Sunlight will make you feel better"

"Will you be here when I come back?" Clark asked as he turned around, hands sliding up Bruce's forearms to draw him closer to his chest.

"Of course"

[not-close-to-straight]

Looking at You (Part Three)

Catch up on Previous Chapters HERE!

*************************

“Tony.”

“God dammit .” Tony couldn't stop himself from recoiling when he flipped on the lights to the lab and saw the soldier sitting by his desk. “You can't just come in here. This is my lab. What are you even doing in here?”

“Sorry about that.” Bucky apologized. “I was hoping you could take another look at my arm.” He lifted the heavy limb. “It just doesn't work like it's supposed to and I know you are better at this sort of thing than Banner is. I'd really appreciate it.”

“No.” Tony shook his head. “No. I can't. You need to leave. I'm sorry but you need to leave. I'll call Banner for you or something, OK I'm sorry but please just leave .”

“You don't have to be sorry all the time.” Bucky said then. “You don't need to apologize to me because you don't want to do something.”

“Is that so?” He retorted, but his voice was shaky and he hated that . “Thanks for that, Sergeant Barnes, I'll tuck that away for contemplation.”

“It's okay to not be alright all the time, Tony.” Bucky frowned over the angry reply. “I'm not trying to-- I dunno. I'm not trying to tell you what to do but--”

Tony looked away, folding his arms tighter across his chest. “I'm fine, alright? I'm always fine. Leave it alone.”

“You're not.” Bucky insisted, trying to be gentle about it, keeping his voice soft. “And that's okay. It's okay to not be fine all the time.” He shifted on the chair like he was going to stand and Tony stumbled back several steps, knocking into a file cabinet and scattering papers everywhere.

“ Fuck.” He cursed and tugged at his hair agitatedly. “Stay over there. Don't come near me.”

“Tony.” Bucky went perfectly still, hands held out peacefully. “Are you... are you afraid of me? Is that what this is? Are you afraid of me?”

“If I work on your arm will you leave me alone?” Tony said through clenched teeth. “If I work on it and fix it, will you leave me alone?”

“Tony, I'm serious.” Bucky knew he was pushing things with Tony, but flare of fear in Tony's eyes had him talking anyway. “Are you afraid of me? Because honey, that's not--you don't have any reason to  be afraid of me. I'm not the Soldier anymore, I'm not the same person who--”

“ If I work on your arm will you leave me alone?” Tony repeated, louder this time. “Just answer the goddamn question!”

“Sure thing, Tony.” Bucky agreed quietly. “Alright. Yes. I'm sorry. You don't even have to work on my arm. I'll just leave. I'll just go.”

“Sit down and shut the fuck up.” Tony ordered, flipping on lights and approaching the desk, tapping where he wanted Bucky's arm.

“Thank you.” Bucky kept his gaze steady, eyes soft, and watched Tony flounder for a minute.

He doesn't know how to respond when someone says thank you.

Christ, that's so sad.

“I said shut up .” Tony said finally, and reached for his tools to start working. “Sit down, shut up, let's just get this done.”

*****************

Tony worked for close to an hour, the limb stretched out flat on the desk in front of him, two of the plates near the wrist pulled off and lying next to him as he carefully cleaned and tweaked the jointed pieces before replacing them.

“Rotate your wrist.” He finally said, and Bucky obeyed, turning his wrist in a slow circle and the quiet room was filled with soft whirs and clicks as the arm moved, the plates shifting into place and locking tight.

Tony's dark eyes lit with interest and his lips twitched up into a short smile over the display, his nervousness and uncertainty over the moment pushed away by his love for mechanics.

The little smile disappeared when Bucky hissed in pain as something pulled.

“Hurts?” Tony asked, motioning to Bucky's shoulder.

Bucky nodded. “All the time. Even when it's working the right way. Pulls on my shoulder, my back. Its heavy, clumsy. Always hurts.”

“I'm sorry. I can't imagine what that's like -- I'm sorry.” Tony put his tools away and backed up from the table, folding his arms again like armor across his chest.

“Don't apologize, Tony.” Bucky kept his voice soft on purpose, trying not to rattle the other man again. “It's not your fault at all. Can't help it. It's not like you held me down and grafted it on.”

“I--I know that. That it's not my fault.” Tony said a little stubbornly. “But I just-- you know what, never mind. We're done here, ok?”

“Alright.” Bucky bent his arm, testing the movement, and all the metal plates clicked and clacked as they realigned together.

Tony smiled just the tiniest bit again, and Bucky caught that one too, unable to look away.

“Why are you… stop staring at me.” The smile dropped from Tony's face and he hunched his shoulders. “What are you looking at?”

“I just like looking at you, Tony.” He answered honestly. “Is that alright?”

Tony blushed a little before looking down at the floor. “That's…um… yeah, we're done. You can-- you can go. Please go.”

“Thank you.” Bucky said with a smile, and Tony ran his fingers through his hair to hide the tremors.

“If you--” he cleared his throat. “It seems like maybe they need to be cleaned. The pieces. Like when my bots go too long without being used. General maintenance.”

“Is that something I can do?” Bucky asked. “Or will I need to be here in the lab?”

“Probably here. Banner can help if I'm not here. I'll leave the schematics for him.”

“Thank you.” Bucky repeated, just because Tony blushed and had to look away and Bucky loved that.

********************

Banner wasn't in the lab when Bucky went back the next night, just Tony sitting by himself in the near dark, staring at the wall blankly, a half empty glass of scotch in his hand.

“Tony?”

“Hey.” Tony shook himself and pointed to a chair, flipping on a few more lights. “Let's take a few more pieces off, yeah?”

Bucky sat obediently, his arm laid out, and Tony flattened his hand carefully, working to loosen several of the tiny plates that formed his palm and fingers.

“Does it hurt when I open you up like this?” Tony asked after a few minutes. “Do you feel it all?”

Bucky shrugged. “Ah, it hurts about as bad as pulling a fingernail off I guess.”

“You realize that level of pain qualifies as torture in most countries?”

“Super soldier, remember? I have a pretty high tolerance for pain, Tony.”

They fell silent again.

“I have a hard time being close to you because you represent something I have lost in my life.” Tony said suddenly. “I can barely even look at you most days. But every time I do manage to look at you, you're always looking at me. Why?”

“Does it bother you?”

“Tell me why.”

“I like looking at you.”

“Tell me why.”

Bucky made a vague gesture with his right hand.“Why wouldn't I want to look at you? Have you seen you? You're gorgeous, Tony.”

Tony actually dropped the piece of metal he was holding, sending it skittering across the table and Bucky reached out with his right hand to snatch it before it hit the ground.

“Don't--don't say stuff like that.” Tony stammered. “Don't.”

“Why not?” Bucky wanted to know, leaning a little closer and Tony almost fell out of his chair as he leaned away.

“I just finished telling you I can't hardly be around you and you're going to hit on me?” Tony cried. “What the hell is wrong with you? Why would you think that is appropriate?”

“I guess that's fair.” Bucky wet his lips and let his voice roll in slow and lazy, looking up at Tony from beneath his lashes. “Can I try hitting on you some other time then?”

“God dammit.” Tony snapped the palm plate back in place and retreated several steps. “Get out. Get-- get out! What the fuck are you doing?! GET OUT!”

“Tony.” Bucky groaned, ran both his hands through his hair. “I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you mad. I was just teasing, honey, trying to make you smile.”

“Don't you call me honey.” Tony warned, backing up even further. “We are not friends, Bucky. We aren't friends, we are barely teammates and we are certainly not ready too---”

He dragged in a shaky breath. “I used to hear about you, you know? All the stories about how Bucky could charm the pants off a snake, how he would talk in a fucking Brooklyn accent and girls and guys would trip over themselves to get in his bed.”

“Tony--”

“I am not that person!” Tony was shouting now. “I don't want that from you! Don't you fucking talk to me like that, you have no idea what you've taken from me and you're going to walk in here and try to fucking flirt with me? I can barely look you in the eye and you're going to try and charm me?”

“Tony, Tony.” Bucky stood to his feet, holding at his hand. “I was just trying to make you smile. I wasn't trying to mess with you or anything like that. You never smile, and I just wanted to--”

“Get. Out.”

******************

“I'm sorry.” Bucky said the following night as they sat in the mostly dark lab. “I shouldn't have tried flirting with you when you were opening up to me. I wasn't trying to disrespect you.”

Tony didn't look up from Bucky's forearm. “It's fine.”

“No, it's not.” Bucky shook his head. “I can only imagine how difficult it is to be around me, to even talk to me and I never would have-- I mean I shouldn't have tried to make light of it.”

“I over reacted.”

“Tony.” Bucky reached out like he was going to touch him, but Tony froze, so he let his hand drop. “Just because you are upset about something doesn't mean you are over reacting . It's okay to be angry sometimes.”

Silence for a moment, then Tony asked, “Why do you look at me?”

Bucky couldn't stop his smile. “Because you're nice to look at.”

“You're--um. You're nice to look at, too.” Tony mumbled, and looked up in time to catch the grin crossing Bucky's face. “But we--I'm done for the night… so you should--”

“Sure thing.” Bucky couldn't stop staring at the soft flush on Tony's cheeks. “Same time tomorrow?”

“See you tomorrow.