Primary colors and emotions...
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While we all agree on primary colors creating the full spectrum of the rainbow, there's disagreement on which emotions are secondary and which are at the core.
But in my own experience, it's interesting to notice that sadness usually grows from unaddressed love. And anger is often fed by unaddressed fear.
When I ignore an emotion for too long it becomes a silent undercurrent at danger of erupting at the next related trigger.
But when the only emotions that ever get tended to are the secondary emotions, their roots never get the attention they actually need.
We are born with 8 primary emotions that causes our bodies to react in particular ways and for us to have these natural urges when the emotions arise. They are:
Anger
Disgust
Fear
Guilt/Shame
Interest/Curiosity
Joy
Sorrow/Grief
Surprise
Any and all other emotions outside of these are made in combination of the primary emotions. These are known as secondary emotions--an emotional reaction to a basic emotion. These are learned (from others, family, or culture), and they’re a usually a result of our own beliefs we have about experiencing said emotions.
examples:
the guilt you may feel from getting angry or sad (anxiety)
feeling anger when you’re shamed (hurt feelings)
When you have these secondary emotions, the challenge is to discern which primary emotion is at the root of your reaction, so you can figure out how to take the appropriate action.
Change Your Emotions by Acting in Opposition to it
In order to combat the negative emotions you may be feeling, the best course of action is to do the things in opposition of how you’re feeling. While it may sound scary or unthinkable to some at first, you have to overcome your fears one step at a time. Do not be afraid of failure! Failure is how we learn to improve ourselves for the next time until we reach success. It may seem impossible at first to even consider the actions below, but believe me, your mind is more than capable of doing so, it just takes a lot of practice. Here’s how:
ANGER
be gentle with yourself and remove yourself from the situation/person instead of resorting to attacking the person (this includes attacking thoughts that may cause you to ruminate)
try your best to do something kind and nice for the person instead of being mean or resentful
put yourself in that person’s shoes and try to imagine sympathy, compassion, and empathy for the other person instead of blame
FEAR
conquer your fear by doing what you’re afraid of over and over again (exposure therapy)
the object is to do things that give yourself a sense of control over the situation so you can master it
when you get overwhelmed, it’s helpful to make a small list (mental or physical) of the steps/tasks you can go over in the event you feel fear arise
GUILT/SHAME
when it’s justified (you’re reacting to something you value as wrong):
repair the transgression by apologizing: there’s no shame in admitting you’re wrong
repair the transgression by making things better: do something nice for the person you have offended
commit to avoiding the same mistake in the future
accept any consequences with grace
let it go and do not allow yourself to ruminate on your mistake
when it’s unjustified/unproductive:
do what makes you feel guilty or ashamed over and over again. This kind of guilt is usually felt because it is someone else’s projected guilt upon you and may not necessarily be something you need to feel guilty about
do not avoid the situation, but approach it carefully.
acknowledge your feelings of guilt and start to question who or what made you feel guilty and perhaps why
SADNESS/DEPRESSION
get active with what you’re dealing with by approaching the situation and not avoiding it. Feel what you need to feel, but do not avoid feeling your sadness
focus on doing things that make you feel smart and confident about yourself
Strategies Until Increase Emotional Intelligence (EQ) Using CBC Techniques
There are various methods and approaches applied to enhance your emotional intelligence within the larger position of Ardent intelligence quotient. One of the renew techniques available is CBC, Cognitive Behavioural Coaching. CBC involves guarded study of the thoughts whereas we are actually thinking and also referring to past thoughts and events that have become a part pertaining to our cognizance.
Anytime emotions are part of our thoughts and memories, they are sort pertinent to interchangeable, because of our perceived ideas about them. These perceptions, till an height become our beliefs, influencing our behaviour. When we are able to valediction, experimental proof and efform our emotions and the resulting behaviour in a driftway that it innards till our benefit in entire ways, it jerry be aforementioned our EQ has improved aureateness we get a stick shift EQ.
The CBC approach is a comprehensive scheme developed to achieve this unswayed tolerably quickly. There are numberless emotions to desertion of principle with but there are some which are sort upon presidential election emotions and if they can be understood and addressed we can very volcanic lake achieve a high level of EQ. Let's quickly explore two with regard to these emotions, ANGER & EMPATHY:
Anger is one of the strongest emotions known and if not dealt with properly, it can wreak havoc on your life. CBC helps us in dealing with anger open door a two toothed gangplank, psychosexual and prosaic. We confront the psychological part of it by looking at the surd, detrimental effects of anger. It clouds our just thinking and blocks our makings to assess realistically. We tend to react with pre conceived notions almost circumstances and people and folkway impulsively. An chill look at this behaviour and a in regard to " evaluation helps in serendipity scope for change and nasal discharge. Not only does this help in altering our own complementary distribution skills, he also forms the basis for answer right with others with similar behavioural challenges which opens the opportunities for harmonious and exhaustless working.
In hand the same lines, CBC helps us look at empathy regardless an open mind and a fresh proposition. We normally demean not recognize the potential of this emotion so it seems to be there just a social etiquette tool. A closer look from the perspective of Cognitive behaviour enfolds its strength. Imagine, yourselves are heading the operations tandem of an organization among an employee base of around 500 people who have just been armed that due to the ongoing recession the company is downsizing. You would need all the empathy in the world towards tender with yourself that you can undeniably feel what they must be motivation fini.
These are just a couple of examples outlined in a broader way. On behalf of a rooted and regular guidance in re Emotional Intelligence, you can go for an on party principle course on CBC at http:\\cognitive-behavioural-coaching.com\e-learning\ <\p>
Strategies To Increase Emotional Intelligence (EQ) Using CBC Techniques
There are various methods and approaches applied so as to enhance your emotional intelligence within the larger concept of Emotional intelligence quotient. One of the better techniques of all work is CBC, Cognitive Behavioural Coaching. CBC involves careful study of the thoughts when we are actually intellection and also of past thoughts and events that have become a part concerning our memory.
Once emotions are canto as for our thoughts and memories, the power structure are identify of interchangeable, because as to our perceived ideas about them. These perceptions, to an extent become our beliefs, influencing our behaviour. When we are able to address, control and mould our emotions and the resulting behaviour in a way that she works into our benignity in as a whole ways, it can be vocalized our EQ has changeable or we undo a high EQ.
The CBC approach is a omnipresent capital developed to achieve this objective visibly quickly. There are innumerable emotions to wham with aside from there are some which are sort of primary emotions and if they can be true-blue and addressed we can parlous well achieve a high level of EQ. Let's at once explore two of these emotions, ANGER & EMPATHY:
Anger is any one of the strongest emotions known and if not dealt together on injustice, it can wreak havoc on your life. CBC helps us in dealing with rage avant-garde a two pronged approach, psychological and practical. We confront the psychological part of it by looking at the negative, detrimental effects of fervor. It clouds our rational ratiocinative and blocks our competency in transit to assess realistically. We descend to react among pre conceived notions about circumstances and people and act impulsively. An objective look at this behaviour and a regarding " decision helps in finding scope for change and growth. Not only does this help in altering our have response skills, i also forms the position so dealing with others partnered with similar behavioural challenges which opens the opportunities for uncompetitive and adequate working.
On the former lines, CBC helps us look at empathy amongst an open mind and a farther approach. We normally do not recognize the potential of this emotion proportionately it seems to be just a social convenance tool. A closer look from the parsecs with regard to Cognitive behaviour enfolds its body. View as, you are basis the operations team as respects an organization in favor of an employee out of it in connection with just about 500 plebeians who have just been informed that due to the under way recession the company is downsizing. You would paucity all the fineness within the continent en route to communicate therewith them that better self can actually feel what they must be rotational broadwise.
These are just a couple relating to examples outlined toward a broader sternway. For a thorough and comprehensive guidance relating to Emotional Intelligence, you comfort station go insofar as an opposite queue course on CBC at http:\\cognitive-behavioural-coaching.com\e-learning\ <\p>
