#questioning aroace

[silly-interfem-creature]

slowly questioning my identity... on top of being acespec I may also be arospec? not sure, because I can't even explain romantic feelings in the first place...

which may be a sign...

(although I am scared because if I am aro in some way I don't wanna worry my gf because I do absolutely love her I just don't know if its the "traditional" way)

[ratboiharkness]

There comes a time in every young, traumatized queer person’s life, where they start to question, “am I on the aroace spectrum, or am I just a virgin?”

(Or maybe not and there’s something I should look into…)

[orngejunkie]

hey quick question for any aroace people out there, cause i’ve been questioning for a long time

i’m not sure if i am aroace, because i’ve liked people in the past, but i’ve just sort of recently gotten out of a serious relationship and i don’t know if it’s my thing, yet when i go out, i’m always scoping for cute people?? plus, one day i’ll feel totally “oh ew romance and s3x, gross vomit” but then the next day, hell, 5 hours later, i’ll see a sweet couple or something and be like “awwww maybe it isn’t so bad, maybe i would want to be apart of that” but then i remember what it was like being in a relationship and then i’m like “well maybe i just like the thought of it”

and recently it’s been tough to tell if my celebrity “crushes” are even crushes, cause honestly, i think i just want to be really good friends with them

please help i’ve actually been going crazy 😞🙏

[aro-acethetic]

Questioning aromantic asexual + overcast skies + rain in meadows for the anon!

Sources:

x x x x x x x x x

[questioning-aspec-culture-is]

(specific) questioning aroace culture is being asked on a date, not knowing how to say no, and trying to make yourself feel romantically attracted to the other person,,, yeah that was a rough ride

<3

[aspec-is-amazing]

I wanna give a shout-out to questioning aspecs/potential aspecs, it's ok if you don't know where you fit. You don't need to know what labels to use, you don't need hyper specific labels if you find that confusing and difficult. It's ok if you use a label that doesn't quite fit, or is very vague, or you just stick to saying you're "questioning" and nothing else, and it's ok to not use any labels at all, or to use labels for some parts of your identity but not others. It's ok to just be.

[questioning-culture-is]

questioning sucks so much. i've known that i'm queer for four years now and i still question everyday. i never feel romantic attraction and i'm comfortable saying i'm aroace but then one day i suddenly am getting feelings for this person and like actually deeply want to just kiss them and do romantic and other stuff and then i'm like "well it's a boy so that means i'm also faking being sapphic" and it's like all the years of questioning just come crashing in as soon as i'm comfy identifying as something. i know i'm sapphic and i know i'm aroacespec but.... am i? what if i'm faking? what if it's just my depression and when my mental health gets better i'll be allo and het and then if that happens i'm just going to lose this community that feels like home. i'm honestly so sick and tired of this. i don't understand and i just wish questioning was as easy as they make it look in movies. i'm sorry this turned into a big rant i'm just...... i almost never get romantic feelings but sometimes there's like one person that breaks through and all of the sudden i feel allo and i don't get it because i'm not and ahhhhhhhhhhhhh but also all i can just keep thinking about is kissing him and argh i just don't get this. pls feel free to ignore this i really just needed to rant, sry :/

hey anon, I don't think I can give you much advice other than this:

faking is something you do actively. not without intent for it

you can be aroace sapphic and like a boy

if this community gives you comfort, you can stay, even if it turns out you are straight, this is not a space people get thrown out of

grey aroaces are also aroace, you don't have to have absolutely 0 attraction to be aroace

if it helps you, you can just identify as queer, questioning or unlabled. you don't have to find any specific label

hope that helps and I'm glad you could rant here.

-Toni