#raysaystuff

[aromanticmina]

"there's no platonic explanation for this", but this time there's not a romantic one either, or a sexual one, or even an alterous one, you know what? not all things need an explanation, sometimes people just feel

[aromanticmina]

I hope your 2024 is full of aromanticism <2

[aromanticmina]

do you love the colors of the arospec?

which ones?

[aromanticmina]

The 5 common questions people have about aplatonics

so, I've seen so many blogs on the aplatonic tag having to answer the same questions over and over again, so I figured I could make a list so that people can have an easier time getting to the answers they are looking for! (and apl people can just link back to this post if they're asked one of this questions, if they want to)

What does aplatonic mean?

Aplatonic is a term that refers to the lack of (or experiencing little) platonic attraction or platonic love, it can also mean having trouble forming platonic relationships due to trauma or being neurodivergent.

2. Does that mean aplatonic people don't have friends?

Not necessarily, there are aplatonic people who don't (desire to) have friends or wouldn't label any relationship they have as friendship (even though, to an outsider, some would seem as one), for numbers of reasons.

However, there are some aplatonic people who do have friends, but they're not really close to them/don't feel love for them.

love and care are different things, you can care for someone and want the best for them even when you're not close enough to them to love them.

3. But if aplatonic people don't have friends, does that mean they don't socialize with anyone?

Nope! friendships aren't the only way you can socialize with people. Family, classmates, coworkers, lovers, neighbors, those are all people you have have nice conversations with!

4. Are all aplatonics also aromantic?

Not all of them, while it's true that there are a lot of people who are both aro and apl (see: me), there are aplatonics who are alloromantic (feel romantic attraction) or just don't label their romantic orientation.

(fun fact, the original coiner of the aplatonic label is an alloromantic asexual!)

5. Are all aplatonics also loveless?

Again, not all of them, there is a great overlap between the aplatonic and loveless community (shout out to my loveless apls!), but not all aplatonics identify as loveless.

Some love in a romantic way, familiar way, alterous way (if you don't know what alterous attraction is, I recommend looking it up!) or just in a completely unique but ultimately queer way (hi, it's me, I'm lovequeer).

I still don't really get it...

That's okay, you don't have to understand something to respect it, if you're still curious and want to learn more about us, there are multiple blogs on the #aplatonic tag sharing their different experiences with aplatonicism, you just have to know where to look!

And remember! the Aspec includes the aplatonic spectrum, you can't say you support aspecs if you don't support aplatonic people as well!

[aromanticmina]

amatonormativity day? WRONG, AROMANTIC BEAM

[aromanticmina]

Fowler: "... little miss?"

Mizu: *comes back from almost dying and starts beating the shit out of him*

[aromanticmina]

master-list of arospec labels and microlabels

I like collecting knowledge of a lot of queer labels,arospec ones being no exception,so I'm doing a big post with all the ones I know, for fun and because it could be helpful for questioning folks out there!

all under the cut!

Aromantic: someone who experiences little to no romantic attraction, experiences it very rarely/vaguely, or otherwise has a significantly different/complicated experience with romantic attraction than most (alloromantic) people. It is a spectrum and anyone on it can simply call themselves aro if they want.

Greyromantic: someone who experiences (or has experienced) romantic attraction, but vaguely and/or rarely.

Demiromantic: someone who experiences romantic attraction only in the specific circumstance that they're really close with that person (or people), they do not experience "love at first sight."

Frayromantic: the opposite of demiromantic, someone who only experiences romantic attraction towards someone they're not close with, and if they ever get to know that person (or people) better,the attraction eventually fades.

Lithromantic: someone who can experience romantic attraction,but if that attraction is ever reciprocated, then the feeling abruptly (or slowly) stops.

Aroflux: someone whose romantic attraction can fluctuate, and is never really static, meaning their (romantic) feelings for someone may change every now and then, fading and intensifying over time.

Cupioromantic: someone who doesn't experience romantic relationship, but wants or has a romantic relationship.

Aegoromantic: someone who doesn't experience romantic attraction,but likes things that are "romantic" (movies,books,aesthetics,etc)

Non-sam aro: An aromantic person who doesn't use the split attraction model, they are "just aro"

AlloAro: an aromantic person who experiences sexual attraction.

Aroace/Arose: an aromantic person who is also asexual/in the ace spectrum.

Apothiromantic: someone who doesn't experience romantic attraction and is repulsed by romantic things and/or acts.

Quoiromantic: someone who doesn't understand what romantic attraction is,doesn't think the term "romantic attraction" is applicable to their experiences at all,or someone who doesn't think defining whether or not they experience romantic attraction is useful or important for them.

Bellusromantic: someone who doesn't experience romantic attraction but enjoys things that are typically seen as romantic acts (kissing,cuddling,etc)

Arospike: someone who usually doesn't experience romantic attraction, but occasionally experiences a sudden rise of attraction, before it eventually fades again.

Nebularomantic: someone who is aromantic because of their neurodivergency or their neurodivergency plays a big role in how they experience their aromanticism.

Reciproromantic: someone who doesn't experience romantic attraction unless the person falls in love with them first.

Alicoromantic: someone who knows they're on the aromantic spectrum but doesn't think any other label fits their experience.

Orchidromantic: the opposite of cupioromantic, someone who experiences romantic attraction but doesn't want a romantic relationship.

Myrromantic: someone who identifies with multiple aromantic spectrum labels at the same time.

Uniromantic: someone who only experiences romantic attraction to one (1) person for a long period of time, and this attraction is never felt for anyone else.

Platoniromantic: someone who can't distinguish between romantic and platonic attraction, therefore can't really say if what they're feeling for someone is romantic or platonic.

Caedromantic: someone who is aromantic because of their trauma.

Idemromantic: someone who doesn't experience romantic and platonic attraction differently, but can distinguish between their "platonic" and "romantic" relationships based on external factors.

Romo aro: an aromantic person whose attraction,experiences,or feeling may be considered romantic in some sort of way.

Loveless aro: an aromantic person who doesn't label any of their feelings as "love", sometimes because the word "love" is usually used to indicate romance and they want to avoid that, because the word doesn't have any meaning to them,as an act of rebellion against amatonormativity,etc.

Lovequeer aro: an aromantic person who chooses to center other types of love who are often seen as "less" than romantic love and/or their unique personal experience with these other types of love.

[aromanticmina]

Yesterday I finished watching The Queen's Gambit (I'm late to the party I know) and I could talk about how I as a (kind of) chess enthusiast really enjoyed it BUT

Beth Harmon is so aroallo you can't convince me otherwise, "oh but what about townes" shut up shut up (/lh) she met townes when she was like 13, she saw a handsome guy that was nice to her and went "is this what love feels like" no Beth physical attraction + liking his personality ≠ love, I've been there trust me.

It's just so refreshing, you never see Beth be curious about the romantic aspects of relationship (holding hands, dates,gifts) but you do see her being curious about the physical aspects (like when she thinks back on the occasions when she saw couples kissing/making out)

And afterwards, the people who she ends up having "fun" with don't become her romantic interests, they become her friends, people who genuinely care about her and her well being (except random college guy #1 but who cares about him anyways)

In the last episode, when Townes comes back? I was so tense, "yeah this is it, he's gonna say he loves her and get together at the last second god fucking dammit", and then the relief I felt when he said "you know I always wanted us to be friends"

I don't know I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm glad her happy ending didn't involve a romance at all.

In conclusion.