Summary: Remy and Emile continue to help Virgil out with Casper and spend time outside of babysitting hours. After a while, they call it a date and Virgil hesitantly agrees.
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Story under the cut: (Word count: 1,2k)
Virgil shifted from one foot to the other.
Cars on the streets were passing by, making the air smell of asphyxiation and acidic powder. Their driving filled Virgil’s head with noise and he sighed softly as he held onto Casper’s legs. The kid was perched up on his shoulders and hummed happily, gently teetering while Virgil tapped one foot, then shifted onto it and started tapping with the other.
He sighed once more and turned into the other direction of the street, his eyes wearily checking the surroundings before, once again, turning back and looking up the street.
“Virgie!”
The youth looked up at Casper, his grip on his legs slightly tightening.
His heart was beating up to his chest even more so than just a few seconds ago.
“Yes, Cas?”
The kiddo leaned down, arching his back over Virgil’s head and gently put his hands over his eyes.
“Guess who?”
Virgil giggled, his chest easing up a bit.
The world seemed to choke him a tad less now.
“It’s me, ya BITCH!”
His wrists were grabbed on each side and Casper retreated on his shoulder. The punk screeched in reply, flinching away and taking a step back as he processed the sudden amount of touch out of nowhere.
Remy carefully tugged him back to him and Emile and Virgil slowly accommodated to reality once more.
His heart was nearly out of his ribcage, drumming mercilessly against his chest.
“Holy f-...fricking sh-daMN, Remy!”
He hissed at the wannabe biker and approached the cinema as he backed away.
“Sorry, Virgil”, Emile offered apologetically as he gently let go off him and took Remy’s hand instead, “sometimes I forget how anxious you get.”
Casper was hugging Virgil’s head and whined.
“Are you mad?”
The emo looked up at him, sighing once more. He breathed out the tension in his shoulders and smiled a bit.
“No, just shook. Em, take Cas for me, a bit?”
His legs were still weak from the scare. Actually, his whole body felt as if it was made of jell-o by now instead of real flesh and bones and blood. Emile nodded and gently took Casper off his shoulders and nudged Remy.
“Sorry, honey!”
Virgil shrugged and shook his head.
“Jus’ gotta stop being so anxious, I guess.”
He carefully wobbled over to hug Remy and then Emile who was holding Casper. The child was more than happy to embrace Virgil again. His giggles rung in Virgil’s ears a bit but it was okay because Casper was happy and Virgil was slowly calming down again.
Emile gave him a warm smile.
“Let’s get in? Remy, you pay. You were mean.”
Remy pouted.
“You scared him with me!”
Still, he scuffled his feet over to the ticket booth.
“Wait”, Virgil interjected, digging into his pockets, “I pretended to be a rich bitch and got us tickets.”
He pulled them out and showed them to the three others. Casper already knew but nodded at the information still.
“Can we see the butterfly film now?”
Emile chuckled.
“Yes, please, I would like to learn more about butterflies.”
The trio had been more than lucky to realise there was an actual butterfly “documentary” on the local cinema. Yes, some cinemas did play documentaries and films that were not purely about blockbusters, Hollywood delights and similar productions.
Mister Galiu had pointed it out to Casper who had promptly asked Virgil to see it with him, considering they were both enraptured with these creatures.
Virgil liked their symbolism and Casper liked the funky facts about them and the happy colours!
Remy and Emile just joined to be with Virgil and Casper. Mostly Virgil, though, for several reasons.
“Me too, darlings. Let’s go seize these snacks.”
They got in, got some snacks that now Remy and Emile shared the costs on. Casper got his funny skittles and they all shared a small bucket of popcorn together.
Every kind of sweet snack was covered and they had more than enough to share when they got two drinks. One big soda for the three adults and one little bottle of juice for Casper.
Once inside, they cuddled up, Casper next to Virgil who was sandwiched with Remy between Emile and Casper. The kid was closest to the exit.
Everyone knew kids might need to pee during a film, so they provided for reasonable solutions and accommodated him by putting him in this space and going to the bathroom with him while Remy had bought snacks.
“When will it start?”
Casper gently snuggled up to Virgil who gently cuddled him.
“In a bit, don’t you worry.”
The advertisements started playing to which Virgil only rolled his eyes and scoffed, Casper perked up.
“You’re very punk, Virgil!”
The addressed youth squeaked and sunk into his seat, a bright blush on his cheeks.
“I am punk and I am right”, he mumbled and carefully reached into his backpack, “yo, I got snacks for us all-”
Emile’s face turned to him at once, staring into his soul like an owl.
“Eat the rich”, Emile responded and Remy rolled his eyes with a smile before repeating it.
“Eat the rich.”
Virgil nodded and continued the chain, “eat the rich”.
“Eat Richard?”
Casper slowly shifted closer to Virgil, nearly sitting on his lap by now until he pulled him on his thighs. The kid stretched up as if to make himself taller.
“It is called ‘Eat the rich’, Cas. Can you see better, now?”
The kid cuddled up to him and nodded happily while Remy and Emile took turns on the backpack before returning it to Virgil who slowly fished a pack of skittles out and gave it to Casper.
“Here ya go, don’t tell your dad. It is just a small one.”
Remy has some licorice and Emile helped himself to some chocolate drops while Virgil himself pulled out some chocolate nuts. They were great and looked a bit like skittles, so he gingerly shared them with Casper.
Emile shuffled over to sit in Casper’s seat. The cinema was nearly empty, so nobody would really mind, he thought.
The advertisement was finally over and the film started.
Emile nudged Remy who looked at him while Virgil and Casper stared at the pretty butterflies on screen. The smitten duo grinned at one another, hands intertwining behind Virgil’s neck. Remy gently shifted a bit to put his arm around Virgil’s shoulders, this time touching his neck on purpose.
“?”
Virgil looked at him, confusion all over his face.
Remy smirked and gently brushed over his face. The emo blushed but smiled as much as he could despite his flustered state.
On the other side of his seat, Emile’s hand reached out for his and gently squeezed it. Virgil sucked in a breath, the red tint taking over his face as he slowly entangled his fingers with Emile’s warm hands.
His heart was beating against Casper’s unassuming back, this time for any reason that was neither fear nor shock.
“It’s a date”, Emile whispered, leaning in and giving Virgil’s temple a kiss with his soft words. He nodded softly.
Remy gently shifted closer and was surprised to find the warm Virgil had previously wrapped around Casper for extra stability to slowly move onto his knee.
He smiled.
It was a date.
Remy leaned back, licorice rope hanging from his lips as he focused his attention on watching a film with his dates and their precious little Casper.
Drunk Kitchen - Chapter 2 “More than Words” (final)
Summary: Emile gets up and takes care of his beloved partners. Remy is hungover and Virgil just loves to snuggle them all. Aka onesie fluff.
Tags: mentions of medication, being hungover, bad mornings, ow ow bodies, nonsexual nudity, being bad at identifying feelings, tears, smol angst for maximum comfort, hurt/comfort, goth remy, pastel Virgil, muscular Emile, migraines, LOTS OF CUDDLES, super much lovs!! happy OT3
The morning eventually rolled around, slowly and surely moving like an overfed house pet.
The air was cool yet beautiful with colours and life. The spirit of the weekend was there and the slow-paced wind was in perfect sync with the gradual start into the day.
People were done with the week and ready to take things painfully slow and just... relax a bit, live a little and recover from stress and pressure.
Emile was no exception.
He slept in, laying in their bed for much longer than usual and just treating himself to reading a bit.
Something in his mind wondered whether he should make up his beloved chaos men but he decided against it in favour of relishing in more silence and granting them a bit more time to recover and consume the sweet relief of sleep.
He eventually got up, his body swinging happily with him as he sung the opening songs of his favourite cartoons shows. His latest favourite of all the literature he possessed inspired him to rewatch Avatar the last airbender again.
Maybe he would do that later but first he would order some food and take a looong and nice shower.
After all, the kitchen was unable to provide any place for him to make some pancakes, even if he wanted to. He was honestly horrified at the thought of getting back into that slaughterhouse of dreams and former order.
Well, his lovely cryptids deserved some extra sleep so he certainly deserved some take-out food.
The man ordered some breakfast and got into the shower just to get out and dress up in a comfortable onesie for the occasion of a lazy weekend of nothing but self-indulgent care and love for himself and possibly his datemates.
...He would see about that last one.
When Emile poked his head into the living-room, he was just in time for Remy stirring awake, silently and carefully breaking away from their beloved tall bundle of pastel Virgil. The soft giant was sound asleep, chest rising and lowering ever so slowly and gradually while the goth climbed climbed over him, every muscle in his system screaming in pain as he dared to shake his existence to persistently.
The movements were so intense and strikingly pain-inducing that he could not help but radiate a great morning energy from anything but a morning person.
The whole room seemed to screech in discomfort as he slid his sunglasses onto the bridge of his nose.
Emile greeted him with a little smile as he took the cat tail of his Katra onesie.
“Good Meowning to you!”
The sunshine of Emile welcomed Remy into the world and the small man groaned.
“Ugh.. Oh.. oh holy fuc...”, he mumbled before simply collapsing into his arms.
Emile chuckled, his arms immediately clasping shut around the other.
“Aw, missed me?”, he cooed softly, his head moving to plant a few soothing kisses all over the pained muscles in Remy’s hurting face.
Everything was a pain, every little thing was damned in agony for him and it was uncomfortable... a bit like a punishment for anything he did or might do in the future.
The slightly taller man gently placed a few open-mouthed smooches onto Remy’s slightly sweaty hair.
“Are you in pain, Ri?”
A groan escaped the other.
In the background, the bundle of pastel softness came to life.
Em patted his love.
“Go, get a shower. I will get your pills and something to kill your hangover with”, he promised soft before turning so Virgil could hear him too.
“Food is ordered and on the way.”
That got Virgil to react.
The tall twig catapulted himself out of the couch, blanket still completing the look of a lost princess disoriented in the middle of a strange world.
“mhw..”
He rubbed his eyes, yawning into his patched-up jacket when the realisation of a new day finally dawned on his internal clock.
Emile giggled, his voice radiating the energy Remy was lacking in his daily pain. He skipped out of the commotion and escaped into the bathroom as suggested.
Virgil received the loving morning greeting of the other coming over to peck his sleepy forehead.
“Hello there my little love, did you have fun?”
The tall man pushed himself closer, his body residing in Emile’s patient lap as he pushed his face into his stomach.
“mw”, he argued stubbornly, “missed you..”
Emile pulled him closer, his arms locking around him. It fit like a key into its lock and they neatly got together. He nudged his datemate lovingly, carefully encouraging him to shift and show his face a bit more.
The tall man curled in on himself and hugged his love closer and just melt in his lap, letting the heat seep into his pores. The warmth eased him into a small puddle of affection and adoration. His heart was beating in blood and love for Emile and Remy and he carefully wiggled closer in his little blanket burrito and mess of his overly big jacket.
“Awww”, the smaller man cooed soothingly as he brushed through his hair.
“I ordered food for all of us”
Emile gently patted his love’s face with tender patience.
“Do you want to get ready together with me?”
Virgil nodded into Emile’s lean stomach and hugged him closer, nearly tipping him over and making him collapse over the laying form. Emile swayed a bit, his body staggering from side to side just enough for him to somewhat regain his balance. His hands quickly caught himself on his knees and he leaned further over Virgil, his back arching.
The smaller man giggled. It sounded like ringing bells and jingling joy. Virgil could not help but smile at this. His arms wrung around Emile and gently tugged him down, just a bit, just .. just enough to signify his intention.
He wanted his Emile.. He wanted the man to carry him and just cuddle close to him so he could be in his sleepy haze for a little longer, just for a bit more. The wakeful one nodded sagely, a knowing smile on his genuine lips. His lips were curved into the usual expression of eternal love and unconditional admiration for him.
A nod and another shift and Virgil was moved into his toned arms.
The blanket burrito of roses and pastels wiggled and snuggled closer to his love and only allowed himself to rest his case when he was smugly pressed against his love, fitting into his arms as if they were figures made for it, made to be together.
The only one missing was Remy, this time.
“Perfect”, Virgil reviewed with a soft little smile on his face. He looked like a smug, tiny bird with all the happiness and little corns in his life.
“Great arms, good grip. 12/10, would recommend.”
Emile shook his head.
“Don’t you mean purrfect~”, he started with a sly smile and Virgil was already rolling his eyes with the half-annoyed and half-amused grin plastering all over his features.
Emile placed Virgil on their bed and took his cat tail, carefully pointing it at Virgil and retreating it when he showcased the feline trait of his costume.
It aligned with his horrible joke, especially when he actually let out a “meow” at the hungover datemate of his.
“You’ve got to be kidding me-”
Emile threw a bundle of fluff at Virgil, effectively emphasising his response when he spoke up against Virgil, his glasses doing the anime blink thing when he took the golden opportunity that had come to him.
“Do you mean kitten~”
He had the chance, he had the words AND HE TOOK IT! Emile Picani made another pun, made a combo and absolutely destroyed his talking partner from the drunk party.
The man got it all, he made a double pun - in close succession! He rocked the field of communication and took the lead in all the puns!
“Are you guys really doing this right now?”
Remy leaned against the door frame, coolly glancing over his two datemates. Finally they were together in one room. As always, their “fourth” partner was with them: Remy’s loyal and faithful shades. The sunglasses rested on his face, covering the most useless part of his bare appearance.
It was such a him thing to just show up without anything but it was also a foolishness on Emile’s part to forget about clothes.
Remy would never think that far in the morning. Especially not after a day like yesterday.
Virgil did not seem to mind too much, despite the bright blush adorning his features. He poorly attempted at hiding his face in the piece of clothing Emile just threw him but there was only so much looking he could do without revealing his face to a certain extend.
When his fingers brushed against the fabric, his attention was shifted to this sensation rather than staring into their datemate and his.. his whole precious self.
He swallowed.
“Ri, look at you! The shower really did a number on you! You look stunning~”
Emile swayed his hips from side to side, hums accompanying his movements as he worked into the closet further, his hands fishing for something in particular. They had a strive in purpose, they had a mission.
Remy scoffed but moved into the room, simply letting his body fall into the softness of their big fat bed. The mattress was the softness of a cloud when kids would imagine touching it and it gently hugged him with welcoming warmth as soon as his body connected to the velvet covers.
He fell with a soft thud, the mattress absorbing the impact of his fall as much as the sounds emitted on any other surface he could have possibly crashed his body into.
It was Remy, a tired, decaffeinated Remy at that.
Honestly, they were all sort of glad the man was walking and alive instead of just vegetating through life, cuddled up on a couch and pretending to care about the effort people put into this strangely popular activity of “not-dying”.
Virgil immediately took the chance to move his legs over him as he dramatically let himself sink into the mattress with his back. Shifting from side to the back of his body was a true chore, given he only did it to gift Ri with the comfort of his twig-like legs on him.
The man beneath him groaned in response but never even lifted as much as a finger to really put a stop to the whole affair.
Other than this, he was contently dozing in his truly vegetative state.
The man was just vibin’.
Not for too long, though, as Emile determined.
The last of the trio climbed onto the bed with them and quickly cuddled up next to Virgil, stealing just enough of his partially abandoned blanket to cover himself a bit. A bit of rose was now resting on the back of Remy’s head who simply breathed it off.
He, truly and honestly, had no more fucks to give.
Well, other than reaching for his lovely datemates and actually pulling his glorious ass back into the game with his wonderful biceps flexing so deliciously for the two cuddly beans to watch. Virgil dove back under the covers only for Remy to slide underneath them as well and join his partners by pressing his precious chonky self right between the two.
There wqas not space.
There was nothing but love and onesies in the bed as the Emile smacked a bit of fabric from his hand into Remy’s lap.
Virgil was still quietly struggling to unwrap the one he had been given before. Considering all the distractions he had to put up with, he was to be excused - by all means. His gay heart and dummy soft baby mind was just too easily molten away and the tender heat coming from his too attractively forbidden and kindly loving datemates had his last braincells yield to the desperate queer screeches of the rainbow cotton mass that filled out the inside of his skull.
There was no brain, only gay.
No logic, only gay fucking panic in this house.
Virgil stabbed his fingers into the colourful fabric in his hands. This was a mess of dark colours and abandoned Christmas celebrations.
Emile literally gave him a Jack Skellington onesie.
While he was busy blowing raspberries on his tongue to spite Em, he climbed into the oddness of this soft, fluffy mess.He would not complain about this.. it was warm and if anyone every needed to bribe Virgil, heat was about the thing to use in order to tempt him into doing something for them in return. Remy was clever to get him into cuddles before asking him to do chores or get him things.
Aforementioned hungover man accepted his fate and crawled into the pinkass bitch fucking unicorn onesie sitting on his lap.
“Fuck, Em, are you serious”, Remy groaned.
He threw his head back, effectively resting the back of it against the shoulders of his beloved beans. They were both an embarrassing amount taller than his own dummy thicc ass. He was stuck between those lively, bright personalities.
What a chore.
There was a pink unicorn onesie in his lap.. it was just being there, being pink, doing its thing and just vibin while he closed his eyes and wished for them to somewhat be joking about it. He could not deal with so much positivity and softness in the morning.
It was way too much nice feelings and pink and so much .. ugh.
Not to be a bitch to Virgil.
He scoffed again, his sounds trying to communicate his feelings and make the point his mind was too tired and pained to string together using words.
“Come on, Ri, join us~”
Virgil chuckled, his shoulder moving to nudge their datemate ever so softly.
“Imma just pretend to peer pressure you along with Em”
He was finally fully dressed in his own share of soft onesie, though he was nothing compared to a pink fluffy unicorn.
Remy’s eyes fluttered open, his lips rolling together as he pressed them together.
They split just for a bit, only enough to allow a few silent grumbles to leave his mouth.
“Will you leave me alone if I get into it?”
Silence.
Emile blinked, puppy dog eyes strong behind his huge glasses. Similarly, the tallest of the throuple poked his fingers into Remy’s sides and snickered just a slightest bit.
Apparently, it was only enough to make the smallest of them sigh dramatically, loudly and tragically. He forcefully sunk his own body deeper into the mattress as if to actively try and disappear into it.
After remaining in this position for a while longer, two pairs of eyes softly glancing at him as if to coax him out of his hiding spot, he actually moved his arms to pull the the fabric over his legs and up to his body.
A few moments later, he straightened himself underneath the furry coat and snuggled into the little coffin of soft and velvety feelings.
He sighed.
This was much better than originally anticipated.
He kept laying there, just laid there doing nothing and soaking in the surprising heat that came with wearing this weirdly synthetic fabric around him. His whole body was wrapped up in some kind of plastic polyester tube of pure and utter heat.
It felt like hell but in the most comfortable and cozy manner he had every experienced.
Remy cuddled up to his love, a gruff sound rumbling from his throat as he snuggled closer to his loves. His body slowly turned so he could spoon their lovely Emile, simply embracing him. The latter did not mind and gently wrapped his arms and legs around Remy in a similar fashion as Virgil snuggled up to Remy’s side and buried his curiously pink hair in the comforting intimacy of Remy’s neck.
The closeness resulting from this position increased the warmth. Everyone was cozied up in the heat of their own intensely isolated bodies due to the persistently caring onesies.
And Remy was such a pretty unicorn.
“I hate it”, he commented sourly.
Emile pressed a little kiss to his throbbing temples.
“You do nooooot, though”, he corrected him patiently, his voice dipping into the soft sound he usually used whenever he got extremely affectionate with his partners.
They collectively decided to close their eyes.
For now, it was time to just be, to just .. exist together and soak up the presence of the others around him.
“You guys are ridiculous”, Virgil butted in with his accurate and absolutely helpful comments.
Remy grunted mutely.
“Vi, Vi, Viiii”, Em exclaimed in sudden excitement. The sudden upsurge of emotions swinging his feelings upwards and skyrocketing him up into the sky.
“Virgil, look.”
He inhaled intensely, his lungs sucking up the oxygen around him wetly.
Emile placed another soft kiss onto his forehead before whispering to his Virgil, neck craned just enough to very much talk over Remy. Quite literally even so.
“Virgil, he loves us so much, he got all red and adorable!!!”
Virgil giggled.
The words their partner spoke were so excited and stressed, they all could hear the exclamation marks and the emotional extra enforcement of words.
Remy shook his head, stubbornly.
His body sank deeper into the mattress as he simultaneously yet uselessly so tried backing up only to dive his back deeper into Virgil’s warm and immensely soft arms.
Being sandwiched between the pastel giant and a whole arm of muscular Emile, Remy found himself to be in a spot that could only be described as pure heaven. He was right between one cloud of silky warmth and one equally as velvety blanket-like one.
The tiny chonk of a hurting bitch was relaxing on cloud nine, trapped in the lovely affection that made his stoned heart melt and cave with every word they spoke, if they even spoke. Hell, even simple sounds or looks could send him into a session of gay sighs and intensely queer feelings.
His pinkycorn hoe-self snuggled back up between them, finally succumbing to just how much he enjoyed the contact, being flanked by the two equally disastrous tall queers.
It was a whole festival of rainbow-colours and intensely soft feelings.
They remained in position for the time being. Everyone relished in the affection they received and gave to each other.
This was heaven, this was paradise.
Eternal happiness should be nothing more but hungover cuddles together with the dearest people you had in life.
Despite being a grumpy shit, Remy felt his migraines fade to a somewhat manageable level. Sickness was less of an issue by now and he was dozing off again due to the sheer comfort that led him to believe pain was an illusion.
He was floating in the bubble of isolating himself from the outside world. He was up above the troubles of earthly life, of any connections to the physical realm.
Remy was lighter than a feather.
He was flying, flying. Up above, sinking slowly, dipping down and landing blindly yet carefully.
When the wings of sleep graced his head and caressed his cheek, he was ready to take a little nap, he braced himself for the comfort and healing effects of a good old powernap in the middle of the day because life sucks and migraines suck even harder but painfully so.
Instead, the fucking doorbell STARTED GOING OFF-
A sudden ring shook them out of their sleepy trance. Virgil flinched into his defensive stance, pulling Remy close to his chest - hell, he would put him into his ribcage if he could.
Emile basically vibrated for a moment before also cuddling closer to Remy.
Essentially, everyone grabbed a bit of soft unicorn and made sure to protect the endangered species that was a grumpy Remycorn.
Emile was the first to snap out of it, his love for his precious partners quickly melting his frozen state. Within a few minutes, he got onto his feet and quickly made his way across the room, announcing “Food!!!” in a somewhat loud-ish yet rather moderate volume.
All things considered, Remy was probably still suffering from a migraine and Emile did not want to make it worse.
Virgil made sure to curl around their smallest datemate while Emile took the social high road and actually interacted with the nice person who delivered food on the weekend.
It was noon but they still delivered food!
He was soon back with two whole bags of food. Virgil was not sure but it looked as if they were softly steaming just a slightest bit. Remy certainly could not tell from the point of view of a man who saw the world through the tinted glasses of his protective shades.
But when Emile passed by with the food, he did not stop to return to the bedroom, he moved on. He continued walking instead of bringing the food over.
Remy sent Virgil a quizzical look akin to a glare more than anything.
A hungover dude just wanted some fucking food and it smelled like a lethal level of spices for his upset stomach and bitchy body.
It was absolutely perfect!
But now, for some reason, Emile was taking the idea of sustenance away from him and Remy would not tolerate it, so he committed himself to mentally - yes, telepathically, if you want to be brave - converse with Virgil.
Somehow, he needed to convey just how upset he was. One of his datemates was to do his what he was unable to do, physically.
“Virgil, Virgil”, his mind alerted the taller one, “Emile got the food, he took the food and ran off!”
Remy was clearly pouting at this point. The combination of his chronic pain and the aftermath of drinking left him in an emotionally special state, not to speak about his physical vulnerability. Even the smallest amounts of movements could be torture to him, depending on how intense his episodes of migraines were.
Virgil knew. He was patient and considerate as always and nodded, snuggling their datemate close and mumbling silent yet actual words in response.
“ ‘s okay. ‘M can go ‘n get ‘t”, he suggested softly, his voice so soft it could barely be heard. It might have been just above a whisper but considering he was so close to Remy, his back and the tall man’s chest pressed together, it was as if he was speaking for him, into him only.
The smaller man hugged himself when the other started moving away. A great source of heat removed itself from him and it got cold within his body but also outside of it fast.
A soft whine escaped his mouth.
... No, that did n o t happen.
“Shut up, Virgil”, he thought at the other who compliantly gave him a kiss to his temples before getting off the bed.
It happened so fast, maybe nothing but a few seconds passed. The world was still spinning for Remy. He never wanted to get up again. At least for the time being, at least for today. His whole world was moving at an incredible speed and it did not stop and everything was so much. Now even his datemates left and there was no food to absorb the absurd amounts of alcohol he had ingested the day before like the dummy thicc thirsty bitch he was.
He felt awful.
The world was heavy and sensing it was hurtful and so much of a chore to him, it felt unnaturally exhaustive.
Now he was upset.
The feeling of somewhat being abandoned struck him, slowly creeping into his skull. He was the small pupper left outside the store for a quick stop but then never to be picked up by their original owners.
Maybe it was just stupid hormones, but he hugged the blanket close to him. It was his little saving grace, his comfort. It did not leave him. It could not even go as far as to think about it because it was a stupid piece of fabric without conscious.
He buried his face in the softness, waiting for the comfort of its feeling on his skin to hit him and slay the bad feelings within him.
Remy felt the surge of negativity take over, the devastation within him fizzy like hot chilli burning him from within and hurting him endlessly. It bubbled up, came so close to his heart while he clung to the fabric, his little lifeline of stability.
It was all ready to collapse like an old abandoned building, like him.
“Ri?”, a voice asked, soft like an angel.
A hand carefully placed itself right next to him yet did not dare to directly touch him as if he was about to collapse, as if he was so fragile, this little bit of touch would simply destroy him completely.
“Riri, we are back with plates~”
Another voice, more gruff but just as dampened to a comfortable volume.
The voices wrapped around his mind and coaxed him into disconnecting his own, damp face from the furry soft blanket.
“Oh, love, does it hurt that much?”
Remy blinked slowly, the sunglasses carefully slipping down his nose from the wetness his tears had caused. Small little droplets of salty rivers drew despair over his features and left sad, lifeless imprints on his face.
The shades were trusty and loyal as always, trying to hide the extreme reaction from the others.
His head slowly moved to shake itself in order to indicate disapprovement.
Just a moment before he started the movement, he stopped and sat up. Virgil and Remy put the food and others onto the nearby shelf - instead of clothing, it would now hold some meals as well.
The two synchronically climbed back into the bed and slid into place by Remy’s sides, Virgil back on his right while Emile joined him from his left side, arms opened.
“ ‘t’s m’kay”, Virgil softly assured,
One of his hands brushed through Remy’s hair, barely as much as touching more than the tips of his strands only. The dark bundle was a messy piece of chaos, still a bit damp yet soft and light to the touch.
Emile let his hand add up, his fingers right next to Remy’s face.
“You don’t have to say it. We can be there for you, still. We always will be here if you want to let us in - if you can, love.”
His words softly pressed into his heart. The paws of his intonations gently caressed his chest, massaging into it and easing the tension within him.
It was like receiving love from a cat.
Remy shrugged, his nose drawing in a sharp breath.
“F-feelings”, he sniffled.
He took another shaky breath, this time breathing through his mouth to make sure he actually got something other than some half-sniffling attempts at breathing in a miserable amount of oxygen.
Virgil scoffed.
“ Fuck ‘em”, he advised as his hand carefully sunk just a tad deeper into his hair. Rhythmically stroking through the little mess, he patiently hummed, his eyes softly taking in his hidden face.
Emile clicked his tongue.
They all knew he did not exactly agree but he sensed the mood enough to not start a lecture at the moment, especially knowing their datemate and his issues well enough.
“What do you want right now? If you know what it is, would you perhaps share it with us, so we can help you?”
The question settled in his face, pulling at his features and straining him further.
It pulled the sadness away and his focus back on the issue Emile has brought up.
Well, what did he want?
The smaller man inhaled deeply, his eyes closing automatically as he focused. His hands blindly got up, making Virgil retreat his hand out of respect. Remy simply lifted his shades to rub the wetness and salt away from his hot and swollen orbs.
They were probably all red like strawberries and puffed up like popped corn.
“Ca-”, he started, his voice leaving him.
He cleared his throat and tried it once more.
“Can we hug..?”
The words were rough like sandpaper and listening sort of hurt in his datemates’ ears and hearts. It was the sort of tickling that got too much, too violent and uncomfortable to the point it sort of hurt because the touch receptors were overloaded and would react in irritation.
All in all, he was so quiet, Virgil barely heard him and he was leaned in close enough to smell the scented shampoo used on his hair. It reminded him of energy drinks, ginger and cedar - one of these “manly” scents of hygiene articles.
Nevertheless, his point came across.
Whether it was him pushing his shades away to reveal his tortured and upset eyes or his words, maybe even the fact he opened his arms so clearly, he definitely invited the two to snuggled up to him or even tower over him and sandwich him as before.
The two took the hint and his datemates were quick to follow suit and fit right by his broad shoulders.
“Dunno, Ri, ya think we can?”, Virgil softly teased.
His mumbles flooded his hair roots as he nudged the tip of his nose against his head’s side. These actions reminded him of a cat bonking their had together with the one of the person they wanted to express affection for.
It magically brought a little twitch of a smile to his face after all.
Maybe it worked.
He nodded and turned his face to press a little peck to Virgil’s prominent cheekbones.
Emile carefully tugged them back down and tickled his skin with butterfly kisses around his exposed collar bone.
“We will always be here for you”, he repeated ever so gently, “if you just let us know, we will always try and make sure to help you and be here for anything you need.”
A little shake rocked Remy’s body.
He willingly sunk down with them and pulled his arms around them to pull his two loves to his chest.
“It hurts sometimes”, he explained, “but it never ceases to beat for you”
Virgil giggled against the beating cavity.
“Sap, you”, another round of chuckles interrupted his silent words, “ya soft, soft sap.”
Emile snuggled closer to him, one of his hands resting on Remy’s stomach while the other one hugged him.
Surprisingly enough, Remy’s body decided to speak for them all.
His tummy grumbled subtly. Faint in sound and strong in movement, the datemates felt the sudden surge of vibrations, causing Emile to giggle this time.
“Would you bear with me getting our food from here?”
Remy’s arms loosened their grip on the two. Emile slipped away once more and Virgil pushed a pillow into the smaller individual’s direction to help him get his head up.
“Bitch beast ‘s gon’a be fed”
His statement painted another breeze of amusement over Remy’s face. This time a more persistent smile rested on his features.
He took another breath, a free and freer one.
“Vi, this is not how nicknames work, I believe”
He handed him a bowl and cutlery before setting down a bit on the little man in the middle.
“That okay”, he asked carefully, his voice edging on tapping around in the dark. Every step was measured and doubted or calculated at the very least.
Remy nodded and patted his side.
“Come back, you silly bitch”
The inviting smile got Emile to sit down with them once more despite the offensive-sounding words.
An approving sound came off him and he awarded his love with a kiss to his nose.
“You two are great. You are just amazing. Em, V, I love you.”
The latter snorted, a part of him looking indignant.
“Ya fuck’n better!”
Remy joined with another giggle, Emile got the heart to do the same.
“I love you too, darling”
The smaller one rolled his eyes before closing them again. He had to pay a price for straining his eyes that much.
Virgil sighed dramatically as he crashed back down into the mattress.
“ ‘kay, fuck. ‘M lovya guys too.”
They cuddled, up, starting to share some food and feeding one another harmonically. Virgil and Remy warmed up to the day and shared stories of their previous adventures along with the food. There was an honourable mention about the Legendary Oil Fight which Emile accepted with many nods and stimming hands.
He himself revealed some more information about his experience of the previous night and the three partners enjoyed the contrast between their deeds and feelings which happened at the same time yet were so starkly in differences.
After they had eaten, they snuggled more and soon reverted to a calm state of dozing more than being awake.
“Hey”, Emile verbally nudged them into a more wakeful state.
“You know you two will clean the kitchen after you feel better.”
“Ugh, Eeeeem”, Virgil groaned. Remy snickered wildly. “He is such a bad bitch.”
“Listen, you two, next time we go and fight the oil monster together and then we will all clean up the battlefield afterwards.”
Virgil and Remy exchanged a look.
...
“Deal.”
Emile smiled, warmth consuming his heart and he adjusted the blanket and allowed himself to press more against Virgil who was next to him after they had switched places a bit.
“Alright, you wild ones. Deal.”
He giggled.
“I will drink you under the table and right into the gutter, you weaklings~”
They all giggled, the sounds mingling and intertwining like their cuddly limbs and sensitive hearts. Soon enough, the three were asleep again, only having each other in their minds and on their tongues.
Summary: Remy and Virgil have some fun with adult juice but their fun is about to drop when the craving for sustenance
Can be read as purely platonic considering there is no lip-kisses.
Tags: food mention ×missing your soulmate ×Alcohol ×Drunken Shenanigans ×Drunken Flirting ×Drunkenness ×war metaphors from drunk idiots taking cooking too serious
tumblr links:1 / 2 || ao3: 1 / 2 / all.
My KoFi - Support me ♥ or Commission me
Story under the cut!
The sun was low, the day was crisp. Afternoon settled over the land and into the bones of workers hungering for the sweet end of their weekend shifts just to make a bit of extra money and finally be with their beloved home.
Outside, a few people got ready to enjoy the Saturday night, to go wild and party and dance until their bodies had different shames and their head carried different names.
The first groups emerged from the home-coming crowds as the birds flew back to their nests and the first buses took the party people over to the pool of sweaty bodies and alcoholic beverages.
Inside, some people reunited their families, others were greeting the next groups of wellness-seeking average people who just lived for getting a meal cooked for them once in a while.
In other places, the party was already high up.
It was autumn, Saturday afternoon and so late, you could almost call it evening with the clouds closing in to frame the sun. The bright star was slowly descending, disappearing behind the busy streets and high skyscrapers.
Virgil and Remy... they were the last kind of people.
Ever since their roommate - Emile, lovely and beloved datemate of theirs - was out to meet his parents and do some catching up stuff, Remy had decided that it was time to do some catching up as well.
Holding up a bottle of strong alcohol, he had invited Virgil into the “fun” they would have and all the other could see was the impending doom within a bottle.
Still, he had given in and willingly decided to slurp some of the disgusting and burning liquid from Remy’s bouncing navel piercing.
Virgil had never forgotten his doubts as quick as in these moments.
Drinking was far beyond by now, the sun was burning with the last intensity of a stubborn yet dying ally. The last words were spoken and Remy sagged against his love.
“wmhwmhw V..”, he mumbled and snuggled against the taller boy.
Virgil swatted at the other but made no attempt at actually pushing him off or anything. Instead, he wrapped an arm around him after trying to get at his little coffee bean.
He wavered on his feet but made sure to lean against the counter as Remy just decided to give in and crush Virgil with the whole weight of being responsible to hold him up.
“The fwuck yo...yo wan-mmm “, Virgil hiccuped as he snuggled the other, “uh.. Ri?”
His voice was low and the words came out much clearer than expected but Virgil was worse off than Remy, despite the heavy hiccuping that came from the smaller of the two.
“VIiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii”, Remy shouted at once, then dragged the syllable along as if it was a piece of chewed out, wet gum rather than a nickname.
The man in question just let out a grunt in reply but looked at the shorter guy with hazy hazel eyes.
Heh, hazel hazy... hazyel...
Pf..
Virgil’s lips twitched into a lazy smile. His arm tugged at Remy who had not enough control over his body to resist the strong suggestion of cuddling closer.
The tall, slightly curvy man chuckled a bit and flapped his long lanky arms around his lovely Remy.
“Ri-Ri - Remyyyyyy”, he giggled in a singsong voice as he rocked from left to right and left to right and further to the right and then stopped.. because he lost the unsteady rhythm his drunkass-stupid mind had set up before.
He was even too silly to follow his unconscious motifs.
The smaller man was torn between giggling and breaking off the whole hug but the rocking movement was something between nauseating and comforting in a way that he felt too mentally and physically weak in his knees to put a foot down and stop it.
He just let his baggy body sluggishly fall from one to the other side within Virgil’s soggy grip.
“Nuuu”, Remy protested.
He was so short of breath, he just snuggled back against Virgil’s chest and let out more distressed noises of Remy’s Complaints :tm:
“Vii....”, he started again, his mind gathering every bit of brain juice he had to actually continue his intention and voice whatever weird thought had built up in his mind, “food..we..”
Remy swallowed.
“we need foo...fofof..foof....”
Remy scoffed at himself, indignation taking over as he felt anger rise against his useless mouth. How dare it just suck at wording like this?
“f-food. FucKING food!”
Spit flew against Virgil’s purple shirt but he was too dizzy to really see it. His mind was everywhere and it felt as if nothing was steady but instead, all was moving.
He knew nothing should be moving and he had stopped rocking forever ago.
Wait, where was he?
Oh, oh yes. Remy.
“uh.. what?”
He blinked and redirected his attention to the other again.
“Uh.. fo-forgot to .. uh .. what .. um, did you say? “
His mind was still drawing a blank at him so he just stared at Remy, hazel eyes empty and void of expectation or thought. He lacked about anything but a high blood sugar level and tons of alcohol. Yes. Yes, so much alcohol of it.. of this bottle and another bottle and oh man..
“Virgil - Vi Vi vI vI v iv iv viv - bitch! virgIL you stupid fucker”
Remy ranted on and patted his chest violently, insistently. The other blinked and just... nodded again, his wavy attention slowly wobbling back into place as Remy wanted to have it.
His mind felt like these ... these screens ..oh man these screens... sleep screens? These screens that happen when you do not use your shit and then your technology gives you that DVD screen and the symbol changes colour and wobbles from one corner to another and usually just hits walls.
This was his mind right now.
“Virgil”
Remy flapped a hand against Virgil’s cheek.
“Like,... food... we gotta eat and this shit.... food... just food, man”
He voice started to sound like he was talking about a conspiracy rather than preparing a meal with one of his datemates.
Virgil carefully nodded. Still, his face seemed as droopy and out-of-this-world as before. Connecting to him seemed about impossible bit Remy was trying his best and somewhat succeeding at this point.
At last, the taller one was looking down at the man in black. A slightly oversized top was hugging Remy’s sides and slacked a bit around his chest area.
Forever stoic, the tall over squinted at Remy and nodded.
“Food”, he repeated.
Slowly, at an incredibly ancient pace, Virgil’s mind seemed to start and actually process the idea of food, a meal.
Yes, food. Food sounded good, sounded like an amazing thing to have. Oh, yes food could be tasty and they could eat together and have really tasty food that was delicious.
“Em has foood”, he argued eventually.
Yeah, whyever the hell would Virgil make food if it was not in order to satisfy Emile’s petite hunger. His mind just could not comprehend the idea of .... making a meal when Emile was gone. Why would he? It did not make sense.
Unless..
Virgil blinked, a flash of intelligence brushing through his alcohol-numbed braincells.
Remy.
“hungry... uh.. you “, he started at first, then swallowed, his mouth tasting of cherries and kisses even sweeter than sugared fruit. And it tasted of a lot of alcohol. It could rival a bottle of common sanitising solution, to be candid.
“You are hungry?”
Remy nodded eagerly!
His head bopped up and down immediately but once he had executed the movement for a bit, his head seemed to understand that the pressure and pain seemed to come from the sensation of sudden and repetitive movement of his innocent brain.
If he tried harder, maybe he would just make a little cocktail in his head.
Heh, like a brain milkshake when you ate icecream a lot and it started hurting so you shake your head until the pain comes off.
Brainfreeze was bad.
Yes.
But food!!
“ah - uh.. food”, Remy repeated once more, “cook - um,.. we should cook.”
Virgil nodded without understanding and let himself be tugged along. The smaller boyfriend was freeing himself from Virgil’s wide hugs and he quickly made it out of the embrace and stepped away from the loving support that was his boyfriend’s stable shoulder.
Without missing another heartbeat, Remy strode forward and dragged Virgil along. Together, they made a move, they made progress, they took a whole step after the other until Remy - the genius of the two - made a big realisation-
Virgil had been his support all along.
His body did not like being without any wall or shoudler to lean on.
Instead of moving forward, he was suddenly experiencing the force of being forced downwards and he and Virgil bonked their heads together as they stupidly collapsed into the floor.
No braincell was lost in the process of making this fall. They were just as silly before the fall and they would continue to be silly even afterwards.
Honestly, they were not more clever, now that they had experienced the first hardship.
Oh no.
Those were drunk idiots.
Hurting heads clanked together and Virgil slid over the body underneath him, his throbbing temples restricting his reason and patience.
What had happpened? Did they not want to make food? But the food... Where was the food?
“Where ‘s Em?”, Virgil mumbled and scrambled his twig of a physical vessel back into a seating position at last.
Remy was still on the floor, groaning and cursing unintelligible strings of words.
Maybe they were made-up words.
They sounded made-up.
Virgil’s boyfriend was beautiful and a really clever writer so he probably knew how to make words. Wow, such great skill.
He really wanted to kiss him now but a part of him was still mourning after the - once again - new realisation of a missing Emile.
“Viiiiiiiiiii”
A voice whined and the black bundle of boyfriend was moving towards him again, hands facing him and arms outstretched as if to grab Virgil like a lifeline.
“Em is not here...”, Virgil responded and laid back down to his partner.
Misery loves company ♥
The tall boy curled around the smaller one and gently hugged him from behind. Remy let out a little hiccup and snuggled into the embrace.
“n we dun hav food”, he argued silently and nudged Virgil’s chest with his heavy head. It was running on pain and simply pressing against his skull for no reason but to be dummy annoying.
That stupid bitch.
“We uh.. can umm.... do this thing - like..uh, cook..”
Virgil swallowed, his body suddenly invigorated by the energy of being right about something, by having a single functioning braincell in his godforsaken drunk-ass head.
“Cook! Oh my fuck, we-we can cook!”
The raven man twitched and tapped the floor insistently.
“PIZZA!”
Virgil nodded.
“uh.. how.. how do you.. uh ,,, we? How ... how pizza? How do you make uh, ujm.. pizza”
“Oh !! o ! yes, pizza!”
Virgil’s mind was already swirling around the idea of hot, cheesy, greasy food. Tasty, doughy and absolutely amazing for his mouth - his tastebuds.
It felt like a relief already.
In foolish happiness, the two got up. It took a while, longer than a few moments but rather multiple minutes until they had climbed and dragged themselves back up to the position of standing, sophisticated human beings.
Not that they were a part of the fancy beings but rather that they seemed to resemble this species a bit more than any other.
Eventually, Remy hung over the drawer filled with snacks.
He needed to eat, wanted to eat and he had a certain craving for the greasiest of foods. The black dude grabbed the crisps and hugged them to himself, snuggling up on topf of the kitchen counter with the little snack as Virgil got minced meat to make a killer festival of a greasy pizza dish.
Remy started off good!
His hands grabbed the package from two sides and started pulling. For some reason, still, his grip seemed to slip. His fingers just couldn't grasp the material properly.
It was one of the shiny packages that felt smoother than these matte ones. Virgil liked the texture better so they usually got these rather than other ones.
Just.. today.. they didn't seem to want to open and Remy, in his silly mind, was convinced that more violence and stubbornness would solve the issue better than scissors would ever be able to.
Virgil got a pan and was ready to got. Meat, pan. What else would a person need?
His drunk mind started working, gears setting into motion and letting his thought process start.
Just as he realised that maybe some oil would be helpful, he heard a loud sound, a sudden shuffling and scattering.
The hazy mind of Virgil redirected his shortened attention span to the source of sound and was met with the sight of Remy covered in spices and crisps.
Opening the pack of crisps with a little more aggression was not as practical as he had expected it to be and now he was stuck on the kitchen counter, covered in crisps and crumbs and excess spice powder.
“...uh..”
The tall blob of confusion looked at the orange boy. Yes, Remy was now officially orange.
Those were spicy crisps!
Honestly, if someone was able to pull off being covered in crisps, drunk out of their mind yet still look somewhat remotely attractive then it was Remy.
The hungry man giggled, his body vibrating and and shaking in amusement. The crisps travelled down, sliding off his clothes and down onto the counter.
“I am tasty!”, he cheered, arms stretched out and ready to hug and tackle the issue at hand, “look!”
The taller one of the lovers just shook his head and leaned in, snatching one off the crisps with his tongue and welcoming the spicy hot treat into the drooling cavern that was his mouth.
A hum escaped his mouth and he nodded his head sagely.
“Very tasty”
The two giggled further, Virgil curling his tall posture into a slightly crooked “l” as he leaned closer to the counter.
His hand grasped the edge and promptly encountered one of the lost crisps that cracked and broke on impact. A dying screech could be heard after the lethal contact. A few crumbs could be found on the inside of Virgil’s hand as he retreated his palm in the curiosity of an innocent child’s mind.
“huh..”, he observed wisely.
His tongue leaped at the crumbs and he absorbed the piece of sustenance.
“We need to clean .. uh.. that”, he added after chewing on his food and eventually swallowing it down. His left vaguely gestured towards the mess of roasted potatoes decorating one of his datemate’s bodies.
It was a wondrous sight but would turn Emile into an upset little puppy rather than a happy and excited Golden Retriever. He did have the soft energy of one.
Remy nodded again.
One of his hands bravely sneaked one of the crispy delights and rewarded his watering mouth with the taste of bell peppers.
“Ish gwood”
Virgil snorted.
“Em- uh.. We- we need to clean”, he reiterated, “we gotta clean.”
The smaller man suddenly shook, his body coming to life and more avalanche of crumbs suddenly breaking from Mount Remy and crashing down onto the kitchen counter with silent pitter-patter sounds.
It was like raindrops but less liquid and more dry. More crunchy and crushing.
Satisfying.
“We! Uh, we can..ah- do uh.. um! Bowl! V! Get a bowl!”
The taller of the two broke away from his waiting stance and slowly descended to his knees to pick up a bowl.
His mind comprehended the things a bit better by now.
The alcohol might be fading or maybe the one bit of crisps was absorbing ALL his alcohol within him.
Or magic, obviously.
They got the crisps from the kitchen counter and off Remy right into the bowl which was then settled in Remy’s happy lap.
He was welcoming and neighbourly to the bowl, hugged it and treated it right because he was proper and gentlemanly in his foggy mind.
Virgil looked at the bowl, full and rich with greasy little pieces of potatoes and a mix of spices.
“uh.. they um.. they will be bad”, he thought aloud and tapped against the bowl as he fished another bit out of it. His mouth was accepting the treat willingly and his stomach howled in anticipation.
Only his mind was still twisting and turning and nothing made sense. Not that he minded too much. His body was warm and cozy and his thoughts seemed to fly.
“we um.. should eat all.”
Remy hugged the bowl, his face immediately scrunching up in distaste.
“Food!”
The smaller man curled up, his legs moving up and his back hitting the wall as he pulled his knees up to his chest. The bowl was put between his chest and the knees.
His precious treasure.
“Ri, we... you are eating it. We will eat it”, Virgil compromised and reached out for the bowl but Remy hissed at him. The heart of a betrayed man was on his tongue as he scowled at the other and gently snuggled his little meal.
A soft puppy face spread over his facial features.
“We eat it..?”
His voice was softer than silk, the tone lowered to a plead.
Virgil’s smile was soft and genuine when it appeared and settled on his features. He tried to mimic a similar level of gentleness with his voice and carefully brushed over the back of one of Ri’s hands that was grasping the bowl.
“We will eat it all. No throwing away.”
Remy smiled at him and nodded enthusiastically.
“We share!”
The two were calmly eating out the bowl, enjoying the greasy treat and Virgil allowed himself to lean into the counter and lay next to Remy.
The latter eventually decided to be a good bean and switch the bowl with Virgil. Once one of his datemates was sprawled over his thighs, Remy brushed through the pastel pink hair tips of his love’s soft strands. The home dyejob was long ago and the colour was faded so much that the bleached hair slowly took over but Virgil seemed comfortable with a tuff of cotton candy as his hair.
He hummed.
“Food... V.. “, he commented and gently patted his head - earning a little gasp from the other in his state of mindless relaxation.
“perfect”
Virgil giggled, the words of his Remy immediately prompting the response their datemate would usually add to it.
“Do you mean ‘purrfect’ ?”, the two inquired in unison before falling victim to their own giggles which soon consumed the incomplete throuple.
They would both hear Em’s voice without him being around.
Remy softly nudged his love and Virgil let out a soft grumble. He decided to groan back and nudge again to insist on his wish that the tall boy move.
“We still need to cook, yanno”
Virgil giggled, wobbling on his feet with his wonky stand on the ground. He shifted his weight from one side to the other and moved like a wave to balance his uncertain steps.
“Heh.. cock”, he commented, intelligently so.
Remy joined his hilarious giggles and soon enough, the Virgil curled over the other, hugging him and vibrating in laughter as his smaller roommate shook and twitched in his soft snickers.
“C-cok..!”, Remy tried to correct yet failed as his breathless lungs swallowed half his sounds. Instead, his miserable attempt at setting things straight ended up in making the whole endeavour even gayer.
“Co-..cockpfffffffffff”
Virgil shook his head, head red with laughter and euphoria as the words hit him and the meaning actually reached his mind.
For some reason, repeating “cock” was amazing and his mind chanted it back at him, echoing the stuttered out attempts at saying “cook” that Remy produced with little success and much struggle.
“c-...”, Virgil laughed loudly, drawing back and wobbling onto his feet once more instead of blanketing his love with the abomination of his oddly large body, “co...cocc!!”
Remy had just composed himself to as much as breathe for a little second but the words Virgil threw into their version of a conversation quickly rekindled the fire of shrieking laughter and gasping snickers.
The two continued simply repeating each others miserable shots at saying “cook” a few more times, wild banter or unfinished words and breathless syllables were between them and filled the room with the warmth it was missing with their datemate still out.
Heads grew hot and glowed in amusement at their stupid joke. Nothin could stop them but their horrible need to breathe after all.
They calmed down and their laughter died down.
Virgil decorated the floor, hugging the cool tiles with his warm tomato head as Remy patted the empty counter he sat on, his hand just mindlessly moving against it, stroking it ever so gently like a lover should be caressed.
The tall boy was already half asleep as Remy’s hazy look wandered over the mess of a kitchen.
Crisps were still scattered wildly around the kitchen counter (mostly limited to where he was sitting) and even the floor. Cups, shots and little decorative umbrellas were clotting the sink and a few empty cans and bottles lined the side of the sink that did not have a drying rack.
Even further, there were towels and napkins everywhere.. and more importantly, a pack of meat and a whole bottle of olive oil.
Why..
Oh, yes. The food.
His lethargic sight was enriched by the eventual addition of crisps creeping into his field of vision.
“V!!! V! The fooooood”
His words emphasised the food part. The significant part.
Oddly enough, he could experience a moment of déjà vu yet without any recollection of similar events happening to him. Or happening at all.
The patch of pink and purple pastels was still on the floor but slowly, the legs within the pink yoga pants started stirring up.
He groaned again, feeling the déjà vu also but not being able to quite place it.
The past minutes were lost on him. Virgil’s eyes blinked at the new day and new situation before him. Everything was fresh to his drunk mind and he nodded as he signaled he had heard his smaller lover.
He scratched his butt but made sure to flip himself over so he could see the other hovering over him on his divine place on the kitchen counter. Far above him, posing on the clouds of this mundane kitchen. The house’s own Cupid was shooting him glances of love and blinked in charm with his lovely eyelashes.
Virgil smiled up at the divine sight of his love. His sight was blurred by the pinkish veil of his hair that pretended to protect his lazy eyes from the longing lights in the kitchen that shone down onto him.
“Hey there, beauty~”
His smile grew into a little grin as he winked at the comfortable god.
“V you silly noodle~ “
Remy giggled back and curled into himself once more, by now fully laying on his kitchen cloud. His legs were slightly bent, the one pressed against the counter a bit more so than the one above it. One of his arms was supporting him as he leaned on its shoulder.
The other arm was lazily draped over his rich middle.
His fingers traced hearts over the counter as he blinked into the pink madness of his little giant.
“What do you want, my love~?”
Virgil smirked up at his adorable master, a stupid happiness painting his facial features with a certain softness.
Maybe it was just the fact half his face was covered in his bangs completely falling all over his eyes and even tickling his nubby nose.
The two gazed at one another, each a picture of the epitome of beauty to the other. They relished in the affection, the rosy vision and blurry flutters in their heart.
A noise could be heard.
Remy blinked, awakening from the trance that was the spell of love his precious Virgil had cast on him with just his soft looks.
A rumble and grumble could be heard. A hollering and squeaking of demands and curses was thrown around - all coming from the hungry monster in Remy’s stomach.
He looked down at it, a distant look in his eyes.
Confusion rolled in his mind but Virgil seemed to remember - or just suddenly have a little bit of understanding left in his mind.
He blinked his eyes further open and patted the floor, gently stroking it before pulling himself together and sitting down properly.
“Riri, the f o o d!”, he told him and grabbed the counter to support himself in getting up. His tall body was soon hovering over the counter and gesturing towards the oil and meat once more.
“We can cook the meat, man”
Remy nodded, rubbing his eyes. He carefully pushed himself into position once more and soon enough sat proudly on the counter, cheek a bit red from laying on the counter. He played with the sunglasses on top of his head and grabbed a nearby bottle.
Taking a huge swig from it, he swallowed the acidic liquid.
His face immediately grimaced as his taste buds detected the different sensations coming at them and his reaction was immediate.
The bitterness of alcohol, the intense burning of it down his throat made him scrunch up his facial features entirely. A fire was felt in his mouth but it was calmed by the abundance of sweetness mixed into their cocktail blend was finally reaching him. A taste of fruity freshness and the acidic undertone from lemons and limes washed the bitterness way and made him forget about the disgusting aftertaste of cheap vodka.
Ugh, who bought this shit anyway. It was one of the most widely-ruined alcoholic beverages on this planet and people just saw it as cheap ingredient for a sad cocktail in their plan to get smashed with as little money and effort as possible.
Which he and Virgil did too, so he could not really judge that.
Virgil..
Virgil who was looking at him, head tilted and exposing his neck a bit. His pastel purple shirt around him was loosely hanging from him and barely covering his collarbone and general neck area.
The tall pastel boy reached for the bottle before Remy got to unscrew it and made sure to empty the rest into his big mouth.
Remy just blinked at the other, shaking himself in disgust for a moment before he received the empty bottle in his hands and finally shut the holder of horribly disgusting sweetness.
“Good”, Virgil reviewed with a click of his tongue.
A pleased expression settled on his face and he looked like a peaceful statue of stone that would sit in some temples and parks.
Remy shook his head, his piercings clanging together with silent sound akin to jingling bells.
The taller datemate cleared his throat again and pointed ta the stove.
“You gonna come.. come and uh.. help me cook?”, he asked softly as he looked at his lovely datemate. He was such a handsome piece of man. A fine man in black from head to toe, even his earrings and piercings were black (safe for the septum in silver than graced his lovely nose).
The smaller goth got down to the floor and quickly wrapped his arms around Virgil’s soft middle.
“mmmh”
Remy hummed and gently snuggled up to the walking softness that was one of his boyfriends.
Sometimes he just realised that they had not touched in a while and it felt ridiculous.. wrong, in a way.
The closeness was remedying the little void in his touch-o-meter. He snuggled up to Virgil’s chest, hugging him close and simply enjoying how the embrace was returned.
Virgil’s large arms folded around him, carefully holding him and shielding him from the touch-starved life without him. The taller one softly started rocking after he pressed a little smooch to the top of his head.
“Got you, Smalls”
Remy let out a sound of protest but stayed within the hold.
No fight, no resistance. It was just cuddling softly, eyes closed and hearts opened as the warmth of affection lulled them in. Slowly, the weight in Virgil’s arms became more present, the pressure against his chest a little uncomfortable as Remy dozed off, falling against the tall pastel bean.
“ m nodt smahls”
His eyes fought to open again and he lethargically burdened himself with blinking at the other.
“Ssure not l-llove”, Virgil giggled in return and leaned down to hug more of his little lover.
Emile was still not with them and it was nagging at him.
“m!”, Virgil argued, pulling away from Remy at once, “We clan - can!Uh ... um.. Cook and and then be up um.. for uh.. for when Emile uh .. retwurns back uh .. home!”
He bounced a bit in his spot and turned his attention back to the stove, quickly moving to put some oil into the pan he had put out before.
“He-he can eat th-the food and ...b..uh.. be proud of us!”
Virgil got on to it, totally absorbing himself in the magical art of fucking preparing food - a meal, even so.
The only thing was that the whole process seemed a little lost on him. Once the oil was in and the stove started to heat up the pan along with the oil, he was a bit.. clueless and left to the devices of a person just as unknowledgable as a child. Or, well, a drunkass FULLY grown adult who does not understand life but is tall enough to eat BABIES.
Helplessly, he turned to Remy as the oil startd to change. It did not look just the same as before, there was something happening. There were small bubbles and it felt like some bride’s veil was just dropped in this shit and now everything was slowly whitish but in a really weird and odd blur.
Holy fuck, it got more.
There was even more.
They got more and more by the minute, soon enough covering the bottom of the whole pan and effectively taking over the oil.
Oh no.
It was... It could not be!
This shit was fighting the oil.
“REMY”, Virgil yelled instinctively as he grabbed his smaller man and hugged him close, effectively trapping him in the sweet embrace of absolute and immediate anxiety edging on panic.
The smaller individual stared at the oil, the whitish bubbles in it and saw the sizzling, witnessed the soft little sounds, almost friendly enough to woe him into believing its innocence but he was smarter than that.
He would not be fooled into falling for this cheap trick. He was a serious and super intelligent man. He was capable, strong, handsome, gay, hungry and even more fucking gay if he did not mention it before.
Nothing and nobody would or should ever mess with a Queen, a Diva like Remy.
Not even oil. No matter how tasty and delicious it seemed to be .. or smell. How did simple greasy shit already smell so aromatic? Honestly, this was peak restaurant ambient!
Remy held his tall boy and hissed back at the rude intruder.
“Oh, you -”, he challenged with the sudden flow of determination hitting him. The alcohol was driving into his bloodstream and fuelling his confidence to the point of proud idiocy.
He eyed the pan... quickly, he could realise the oil jumping at them, starting the fight, picking up weapons and hitting the first men!
“TAKE COVER!”
The malicious entity has chosen.. death.
Ah, alright.
Remy saw that. Remy understood.
He was a clever man.
He blinked, refreshing his mind and eyes at once.
Within SECONDS - because he was a genius among mortals -
he had calculated e v e r y t h i n g.
The oil was coming for them, launching missiles of little white bubbles and hot hard pain at them. It was seething, it was cruel and it was not the last word of blood and injury spoken between them.
Remy predicted the attacks swiftly, his mind working overtime at the task of working out a plan as he threw himself against Virgil to dramatically shift them out of shooting range.
They needed to be safe from this evil monster, the ill-spirited being of oily disasters and compromised bubbles of seething, white rage.
“Virgil, Virgil we - “, he started, gasping his words out as if a terrible injury was keeping him from breathing and speaking properly, “we need to stop it!”
The long man nodded, gaze shifting from the monstrosity of oil he had unleashed and the alarmed face of Remy’s usually so calm features.
He reminded him of a person at gym, you know, those fitness coaches that were really into physical exercise and they would push you to your limits so hard, you wanted to cry. Kinda. A weird cry of yes and no but it was no maybe, not really. Actually, it was not maybe at all.
It was weird and it was painfully feigned enthusiasm for self-torturing devices.
Wait, how did he -
Oh yes, the oil.
“We, um.. uh .. stop it”, Virgil agreed.
A small tinge of regret stabbed him like the shady little bitch it was. Just a fucking little backstabber getting back at him - literally, pun not intended - when he least expected it, when he was exposed and vulnerable.
Okay, he was always vulnerable.
Virgil waved his hand around as if to fan the danger away with his magical drunk powers of dummy-thiccness.
“We can distract it”, he slowly suggested, his voice slowing down significantly, “away from us.”
His hands were parallel to one another, as if to indicate a certain length that was the space between his hands. The palms faced one another and he moved the pair of hands from one side to another with an air of importance surrounding him.
Remy nodded with great authority.
“Amazing plan!”
He agreed with a cheer and stared back at the raging fireworks of oil bullets littering the kitchen with greasy spots and defacing destructing.
The situation got out of hand, slowly but surely so.
Burning olives could be smelled.
They were the souls of the dead, the fallen and forgotten.
Their sacrifice would not be for nothing, it would not be dismissed as collateral damage.
Virgil dashed forward, running straight through the shower of oily precipitation raining down on him, his vulnerable pastel soft self.
He screamed, screeched and cried in battle demeanour and aggressively threw his head back to face his opponent.
“I will take it from here!”
Virgil stared at the pan, the drawer underneath it heavily attacked by the angrily steaming monster.
It was where all the lids were.
“Ri!”, the pastel baby called through the loud hissing and shrieking of the raging dumpsterfire that was hot and burning oil, “You go bash that meat into this shit”
Virgil swallowed hard, the words on his tongue too much for him to comprehend, tears forming in his eyes as he came to terms with what he was about to announce.
“I will go get the lid and shut this fucker up”
Silence.
When radios or TV channels hit an error, there was that weird static sound, somewhat intense and monotone but persistent.
It was this kind of sound that seemed to dominate the battlefield the oily savage had forced upon this kitchen.
Their kitchen.....
It would pay for it.
Remy’s beautiful face of love and darkness was derailing into a shocked movement of mouthing protests, proposing empty alternatives to the plan.
Virgil shook his head decidedly, not even paying mind to the multiple Remys before him.
It was just an oil job. That shit had messed with their kitchen enough but it would not mess any further with him and one of his dear beloved ones.
He looked down at his arms, spots of burned skin meeting his vision. Future scars of the heroic action he was about to complete.
There was flesh missing in his mind, in this kitchen. It was lost like the comrades they had forever missed in battle. The salt shaker, the cocktail glass... The little spoon with sugar crystals still on and around it.
They had fallen and they were to never return.
The two engaged in eye contact for a moment lasting longer than a heart’s eternity. Their eyes longingly connected, just a bit, only a second.
Remy gulps down his hesitation and fear. While the oily giant was harmless at first, it was fear-inducing and absolutely horrifying by now.
It was teaching them the lessons of obedience and pain - the hard way. Their hearts knew love from each other but they also felt the terror blown into them by the horrific enemy rising in their kitchen.
Virgil nods.
The time has come.
The nod was slow, an exaggerated movement in order to make sure Remy would not miss it. Compared to the following actions, it was basically slow motion.
Then, everything happened at once, happened in quick succession and happened incredibly so.
Remy dashed forward to the meat and just flung it right into the pan at once while Virgil slid all over the floor to the drawer and Pulle out a lid just to immediately smash it on top of the pan, covering up the oily mess and saving them from the dictatorship or violence and hatred.
Just like that it was over, they counted their wounds and embraced each other as shivers and memories crawled up their spines.
They knew what have been through and they wouldn't be able to just live it down. It would stay.
The raging fire of the defeated oil could still be heard but it was contained at last, it was not out there to hurt them anymore. they were safe and sound in each other's arms.
Remy squeezed the pastel blob in his arms, the slightly taller male wincing at the friction and pressure against his wounded skin. His exposed arms smelled like burned meat.
Or maybe it was just the actual minced meat cooking in the pan. They didn't know.
The sage hand turned down the heat of the stove and Virgil gently nuzzled his boyfriend's neck, his fine face quickly hidden in the collar of Remy's black jacket.
Not even at home was the place for Remy to take it off. He was more comfortable in it and he absolutely was right in just how stunning and badass he looked with it decorating his biceps.
Virgil gently dove deeper into the embrace and just sighed, softly mumbling nice things, little praises and compliments for his beloved datemate.
The other carefully reassured him, told him he was proud and that it was over.
The oil was still angrily boiling and loudly seizing the meat inside.
Remy carefully nudged his love and have his cheek a little smooch.
"We did it" he concluded and gently squeezed his hands. Virgil nodded, lips curved up and humming in affirmation.
"You're a brave one, Rem", he shot back.
The addressed man let out a small sound, something akin to a groan. His cheeks were dusted in red feathery delight of a warm blush.
He gently shook his head and peppered a few more kisses all over Virgil's scarred face.
"No, you", he softly countered.
Virgil giggled and shook his head as he pulled away and turned to the food.
The smell of cooked meat was reaching up to their nostrils, spoiling and temping them with the luxurious scent of a promising meal.
His stomach rumbled in anticipation.
"Cheese?"
Remy tilted his head as he carefully pushed Virgil out of the way to stir the food without getting hurt. Even with some oil spilling around and shooting into his direction, the jacket protected him.
Virgil's soft appearance wasn't covered up enough for him to be safe from the deathly syringes of oil doses. He got the hint and stumbled around to get his jacket. Emile and Remy had hade it for him.
He loved it so much.
"Yes, cheese. Of course"
The two, now oddly sober, cuddled up before the stove and got into the whole cooking process.
Virgil got cups of actual water for them at last and they both drank this. They didn't feel ask dizzy and odd anymore, nor just focused and immersed in the idea of eating food. The smell really did it to them.
Virgil had added some spices and Remy sneaked some more crisps into his mouth, occasionally feeding some to his beloved soulmate. Well, one of them.
He softly rests his head against Virgil's shoulder as he stirred cut tomatoes into the mix. Some herbs and beans were added by Virgil at this moment.
Who would have thought they would eventually get to make food at all? They certainly believed in it, during the times when they actually remembered wanting to make food.
The pastel pal snuggled up to Remy, leaning against the much stronger one and simply dozing to the delicious smell of probably just slightly burned food.
Remy nudged his datemate to the couch to doze a bit. Virgil was hugging a bundle of blankets rather than covering himself up. He looked ready for more hugs as he silently whimpered for Ri to give up on the food and just cuddle him.
Meanwhile, Remy mixed grated cheese under the food and added fresh lettuce like the genius he was.
His mind was young, hungry and drunk but he was also wild and free. Especially free of logic. The emptied cans were cluttered all over the kitchen and barely any space was left unoccupied from the drunk ramblings of idiot amateur cooks.
Towels, trash, cutlery and plates were all over the place, some cutting boards adding to the mix and obviously many bottles and cups. The oily mess all over the counters and the floor wasn't even spoken of at this point. There were still so many other stains in the usually so clean and tidied up kitchen.
Usually, Remy would take care of cleaning the kitchen, keeping it neat and clear at all costs but right now, he was not in the mindset. He was drooling over the food the had made. It was probably way past midnight, yet he was focused on the food.
The steaming hot goddess was lazily falling from his big cooking spoons as he stirred and mixed stringy cheese into the mix of spices and meat and so so many tomatoes.
Considering their state, they could have cooked worse food. The heaps of reddish "stew" heavily fell back into the pot. By now the strings of molten cheese were drawing lines and twirl through the wonderful creation.
Oregano tickled his nose.
He got a big bowl and basically spilled 80% of the stuff into it. The bowl greedily absorbed the food, taking it in and deliciously spreading itself with the tempting smell and sight.
in Remy's mind, he had halved the whole drunk masterpiece of smells and tastes but reality didn't exactly reflect his beliefs accordingly.
He didn't mind the few bits of mashed-up food staining the sides around the bowl. Not that the kitchen was suddenly turned into a worse mess by this. It wasn't a significant addition but rather the cherry on top of a true mess.
Anyhow, the food was done and ready to feed them. He got three spoons in all his laziness and wobble his tickling legs into the living room with his love. Emile would be bs ck soon and he would be able to eat with them and enjoy it along with them.
It was just a matter of minutes, right?
The goth popped up next to Virgil, dropping the bowl on the table with the flattering spoons clashing onto the glass table in front of them. Virgil was curled up in his corner, stubbornly and lovingly hugging the pile of pink blankets. They had a rose pattern all over them.
As much as Remy adored seeing the contrast of Virgil's mostly white and pastel pink appearance with the more intense rose colour and the floral patterns. Green and reddish hues seemed so stark and radical next to the soft colour scheme that he presented with his peaceful figure of a dozing drunk cuddlebug.
Still, the knowledge this used to be a gift his ex had given him didn't sit right with him. Not exactly, at least.
Remy nudged him.
"Love, the food is done", he gently reminded him, him voice pressing against its ground and keeping it as low. It was a ducked down figure in a dark corridor at night when everyone was asleep but the little figure that was the voice.
"huhmm", the pastel punk mumbled softly and stirred ever so slightly, his curled up body opening up for Remy to fill his arms rather than the blanket. His halfway covered face was more visible by now since he tilted it a bit.
Remy smiled a tad.
"Come over love", he invited gently and patted his lap as he brushed over Virgil's arched back with his other hand.
"mwmm"
Remy hummed back in return.
The pastel bean shifted over into his boyfriend's lap, resting himself in it with the upper half of his body as he curled up on the new space, now with his arms loosely wrapped around nothing but the love between them.
He felt Remy brush one hand through his dyed hair and his lungs immediately relieved a breath which came out in the form of a sigh.
The smaller of the two giggled.
He hummed.
''You slee..sleeby..?'', he asked softly, his voice ending in a low hum.
Thoughts and words were mentally swirling around like noodles in a nostalgic childhood soup. You know – the ones with noodle letters in it. They were aimlessly whooshing from side to side, queerly dancing in an uncertain rhythm with uncoordinated movements guiding them into the unknown.
Neither Virgil nor Remy were ready to bring order into the mess of lost letters and unconnected pieces.
There was some sense between them when Virgil basically purred under the ghastly touches, these bare fingers gracing his skull and caressing his pounding head. The tall man curled up into a ball, reaching out to lazily grab one of the hands Remy needed to keep around him somewhere.
In his hazy state of mind, Virgil just somewhat expected a random Remy-hand to float around before him because surely the hand to touch him was in front of him .. logically. Yes, he totally deduced that by means of not looking around because his eyes were so heavy with the pleasure of being touched so delicately, the satisfaction of being handled with great care as if he was a fragile glass of thin sugar – just a moment about to break apart, melt away or dissolve into sugary water.
Sadly, his extremely intense and complex calculations turned out to be – surprisingly – wrong after all, leaving Virgil wondering just how he ended up with an empty handful of nothing but all the needs for more body contact he had harboured in it before his attempt at catching more of at least one of his beloved datemates.
Involuntarily, he let out a sound of disagreement, a sort of angry hamster sound.
His hand fell over Remy's lap, simply collapsing over it with the sound of frustration and slight anger accompanying the dramatic fall of his unmotivated limb.
Virgil instinctively curled further into his fetal position as Remy tried his best to conceal the chuckle rumbling up from within his chest.
He was trembling with amusement but, picking up on the distressed Virgil-sounds, he reminded himself to maintain at least a small amount of countenance in order to not repeatedly poke his sensitivities. The goth was not making fun of him after all or finding his distress to be somewhat entertaining at all.
His drunk brain just... short-circuited at how adorable yet odd his lovely idiot sounded when he randomly stretched out his arm just to immediately let it flop down onto his lap and just groan at it as if moving was the worst punishment to ever happen to him.
Virgil's hands were already working up to his hood, confused finger tips tugging at it and letting it clumsily slip through them because fabric was so hard to hold onto. His uncoordinated grip on them caused him to lose his motion many times as Remy leaned back to give him the space he needed to curl his fingers around the hem of his hood.
He squealed and screeched in anger at the exhaustive process of getting this right.
Eventually, though, he got his fingers tightly buried in the hood, knuckles turning white as his tired kind just moved his head along with motioning the hood to lower over his head and prevent the access Remy's gentle fingers used to have to his soft hair.
''Oh, darling, nu'', Remy tried softly, his voice attempting to reach out to the closed off taller bean before him.
''Hey there, lil' coff'he bean''
He poked around, carefully searching to reach the long nose in the excess of fabric that stretched over a great part of Virgil's face.
It averted itself when Remy fianlly got around to brush against his nose.
''Nu'', he spat out at once, his hands trying to pull the blanket over him as well.
Remy patted his head but the so-called ''coffee bean'' was retreating and hissing at him.
''Com'on, my coff' bean'', he cooed once more, his voice softly sneaking into Virgil's mind, into his heart. Slowly and surely, it got around to actually stop his fingers from pawing at the damned blanket.
This cursed stupid pink fabric with its silly roses and vines all over it.
...M.. Shtupid.. roses.. n stupid ''Princey'' guy.. This was their Virg. Theirs only.
Remy kept himself from narrowing his eyes at the enemy. There was no time to be jealous when his little bean curled away from him. This was worse heartache to him than a past lover he and Emile had clearly helped Virgil get over.
He nudged him again and the pastel ball returned another hazy noise in reply. It sounded much like a stubborn ''nu-uh!''
''I didn ..laugh about yu, my dear''
He cleared his throat and rubbed his eyes patiently.
'' 'm just laughed b'cuz ..am so hap-...happ...happy to be wif..wiff you-you'', he started, a little hiccup interrupting him, ''and to see you“
Another hiccup rudely disrupted his flow of speech.
''in mah lap, hun.''
The charcoal-clad man nudged his love's cheek tentatively, barely managing to draw a response from him.
''mmm.... mean'', he retorted insistently.
''Virgiiiiiiiiiiiil'', he whined at once, ''I made fuuuuuuud!''
He inhaled deeply, sitting a moment for the dramatic effect. Or really, he was just waiting because his mind drew a blank on whatever else he had intended to say at some point in time. Uh.. he had made food.. there was food and he was with Virgil and he made the fud for him and Emi and.. uh..
Ah! Yes!
Remy blinked excitedly and nodded to himself, congratulating his genius of a mind that suddenly recovered the thought process lost to the alcohol dampening and slowing down his cognition.
He leaned in, bowing deep over the protesting bundle of purple and black. From the lack of words, he wanted to think that Virgil was dozing off and forgetting about the little misunderstanding between them.
''If yu... wan...nn..wanna'', he slowly suggested, ''I can.. feeed you-hoooo''
Virgil slowly blinked, his eyelids breaking open to reveal his dark embers of small orbs.
''Mh?'', he murmured. His head pushed back to Remy's lap and quickly nudged his chubby stomach with careful, uncoordinated movements of a person not just anything but sober but also sleepy and full of feelings.
He tasted love on his lips and gently brushed his tongue over them.
''Ri'', he demanded, voice soft with sleep and heavy in the exhaustion from fighting to stay awake, stay conscious and mindful of his surrounding enough to understand his present datemate at least.
The addressed man patted his hooded head softly.
''Com’up'', he mumbled back and tugged at the sleepy giant in his lap.
Virgil was soon sagged against Remy but at least sitting. His left still fruitlessly brushed over Remy's lap.
Hug... He.. He wanted a hug.. Hug.. Hug Remy.
''Riiii'', he soothed softly, voice still just a whisper if any. The goth drew an arm around him and pulled him closer against his shoulder.
''M here, hon'', he assured patiently, mind already wondering just what they were doing again, '' gotcha close.''
He nuzzled the top of his head and carefully left a not of his love on it with a little peck.
Virgil snuggled up to him, his body fitting just perfectly to his side. They were a perfect match, all that was missing was a bit of food now. And a bit of Emile, of course. Emi would make it all perfect.
Remy drew him closer and simply let them hug one another for a bit longer. More like waiting for Virgil to slowly gather up his energy and bodily control to eventually embrace the other fully and just rest in each other's love.
The taller one hummed against his collarbone, eyes comfortably closed in contentment.
''You said.. fud..?''
Remy laughed.
''Yeah''
***
The night draped over the village, hugging every little building and lamp post for comfort and love as it lovingly warmed everyone into a world of dreams and happy thoughts. It was the end of the day, it was late and actually almost time for yet another day.
Emile rubbed his eyes, keys to his car jingling in his hands as he approached the door. He had never expected a catch-up to take this long but the afternoon just spun further and further into a late evening and eventually, they had switched locations in order to extend their get-together beyond the point of midnight.
Any texts of updating information to his lovers had been to no avail. Emile thought they were having too much of a good time or perhaps even went to sleep when 3 am had arrived.
He did not know how they were doing but he trusted them to be fine, to relish in just being two chaotic yet lovely cryptids together.
He straightened out his dark blue suit and ran a hand through the strawberry blonde mess of formerly gelled-back hair.
His hands worked to unlock the door and once he stepped inside, he shut the door behind him. At once, a certain.. smell hit his nostrils.
He was not sure what it was but it was obvious that the flat had not been aired out properly. The air was thick enough to try and grab a piece out of it. And the scent? It reminded him of a greasy fast-food truck. If he had to guess, maybe something like chilli cheese hot-dogs? He was not sure but there was something spicy in the hair.
It kinda stung.
Emile blinked and switched on the light, quickly taking off his dark overcoat and the first layer of his suit along with his dress shoes.
He was left standing in his vest that was hugging his firm statue, accentuating each and every part of his muscular body.
A part of him wanted to call out for his beloved ones but he knew them, he knew the partying souls living in the calm giant that was the pastel-soft Virgil. He was more than familiar with the outgoing and extra kind of behaviour Remy would display with just a bit of party around or in him.
He did not intend to torture them with loud noises when he knew they were wild spirits just waiting to run free and roam around without any constraints.
They deserved to rest well after partying hard, to be honest.
Emile slowly moved into the bedroom just to find it .. void of the silent snores and little shuffles that came from the drunk sleep of his beloved mates.
Instead, there was nothing and he simply frowned at the empty bed. The bed was made, still so it was obviously untouched. Nothing had happened here and none of his lovers happened here for sure.
A part of him wanted to call out for them by now but something held him back. This something was lingering within him as he peacefully stripped his body off the suit and changed into his pyjamas.
When he came across his phone, he decided to tap their contacts and just call one of them and then the other, just in case they went out and one did not pick up at first. With the two being tipsy or even drunk, there was no knowing for sure.
He put the phone on speaker and got into his flannel PJs.
Toot.
Toot..
Faintly, somewhere, he could hear something.
At first it was so distant and weak, he nearly overheard it, due to the sound of his pyjama stretching over his body being louder than the faint tone in the background.
However, once he stilled his movements and stopped dead in his tracks, he was able to identify a sound - even the nature of it.
“I’m on the battlefield like OH MY GOD”
It was Remy’s ringtone.
“Yes, I’m a one woman army”
Emile blinked, the song now clear as day in his mind as he finally identified the muffled sounds. He picked up his phone, fingers flying to grip it and shut the loudspeaker.
“oh la la, oh la la ~”
The song was indicating him to come closer, luring him in and playing hint for his curiosity. The mind was working as he took it step by step through the dark apartment. The end of his pants were dragging over the floor as he sneaked over the ground, his feet merely separating from it with every step he took.
His feet ate every bit of sound as he walked, progressing at a speed so slow and cautious, he felt as if he was walking on eggshells rather than the socks Remy had made him by hand.
The sound was getting closer, the persistent, cocky voicelines of the singer were shooting through his mind as he carefully approached the scene.
Before him was the darkness leading up to the kitchen. The light from their bedroom was illuminating his way to it.
With a usual movement as if everything was as it used to be, as if there had never been a war and losses in this field of tragedy and blood, Emile switched on the lights and revealed the graveyard of oil and hopes.
The sight was quite a bit-
Pans and pots were stacked on top of one another. Spread over a turned off stove and the abused sink who witnessed it all. Stains of any kind seemed to repaint the counter, floor and partly even the ... the ceiling?
How did they do that!
Unbeknownst to Emile, the horrors of battle drew consequences nobody would be able to imagine. Of course it would paint the world into a new picture, it would change reality and distort beauty into true abominations of cruelty.
There was a bloody puddle of oil on the floor, a pool of death juice tainting the world of the living with what used to be, what used to exist and live and grow.
It was no more.
He slowly, respectfully stepped forward, deeper into the red flags of the forbidden zone. There was desolation and chaos. Cutlery, foods and spills whatever in any place and spot free enough to accommodate it.
His feet slowed as he progressed further into the field of war, the area of missing people and lost souls.
He walked through the mess, skipping over dead utensils and empty packages. There were bottle caps all around and the worst was little glitter particles and sparkles all around. Maybe they had mixed drinks with glitter.
In the context of the battlefield, it looked like the luck and happiness that used to wield yet now it was broken and scattered in the wind of change, the breeze of ends.
Emile watched the drain in horror as he identified tiny pieces of fruit stuck in it. Cocktail cherry bodies blocking the water from ever flowing into the sweet relief of the sewers. It was forever trapped in the sink along with the dying cutlery.
He strove through the devastated lands, through the chaos and destruction. His eyes did not see the past, did not see the struggle to stay alive - to be safe. He was blessed with the ignorance of arriving fashionably late to the scene and just luckily skip out on all the war.
He never had to experience the torture of the oil giant.
Emile did not even realise how much of a chosen man he was with the entitlement of being spared with mercy and love.
His innocent soul floated above the rotten land, the stabbed and wretched floors and towels soaked with tears, blood and sweat. The salt of ruined soil was poisoning the roots of a new generation. He simply skipped through it, free of guilt or memories. He was not drawn to the tragedy of what used to be.
Instead, he marched over to the living-room to finally find the treasure he had been looking for. His flannel-clad self, the pirate of the suffering lands was here to take advantage of the tired soldiers of oil wars.
As unexpected, there was a bundle of black and a bundle of rose snuggled up together, the colours weirdly merging into one fusion of softness. The pattern of roses naturally fit the blackness it was curled up around. It seemed like the most natural occurrence, a home-grown batch of adorableness.
Emile blinked, his eyes behind his glasses still needing to adjust to the dark image before him. It was dark because he refused to switch on the lights when his loves could and actually did camp in this space.
“You two are lucky I love you so much”
His whisper slowly weighed down onto them, gracing them in their sleep and rocking them in warmth and affection.
They were in the lap of love and safety, dressed in their own schemes and shenanigans with contentment painting their features and highlighting their position with lazy sparkles and soft contact to one another.
Emile bowed over them to draw another blanket over the two, just to make sure to cover them both in the warm coziness they deserved.
For another short moment, he relished in seeing the two embracing one another, Virgil curled against Remy and holding him so close, he would usually fear the other could suffocate - yet he knew better than to worry about them. Remy enjoyed a surprisingly large amount of squishing and a comparably lousy amount of space for sleeping.
After this, he slowly and softly walked away, step by step, back to the bedroom to nap on his own, all alone in their big big bed.
He snuggled up with his excess of blankets and soon enough fell into a deep sleep, completely unbothered by everything that used to be and will be. For now, everything was different and so cool compared to how it would be per default but that did not mean his night could not be nice.
Relieving dreams soon settled in his mind, abandoning all possible worries in his mind.
Hello, we are the Neighbours - 2 (final) “Starry Night”
Summary: Virgil uses she/her and he/him. Remy uses he/him. Emile uses they/fae. Logan uses they/them
Tags: a LOT of swearwords, edginess, Teenagers scare the living shit out of me, edibles, mentions of getting high, marijuana (implied), questionable living conditions, stress, insomnia/sleeplessness, crappy parents, (depression?) SOFT SIBLING MOMENT (analogical)
Virgil hugged his stupid friend closer, his face buried in the mess of Remy’s pastel purple sweater.
She was basically wearing nothing but a big army jacket and boxers, herself. The pinkish scars on her chest were fainting with time but still showing after all these months.
Remy was at least in a skirt longer than usual - this one actually covered his ass completely. Instead of big boots, he had white summer slippers one. He almost looked like a ballerina with his long legs, small-ish statue and flawless skin.
The sun slowly sunk down the horizon while the two cuddled.
“You know, you are almost out of there, anyway. It does not matte. You got so far, Virgil. You will get through this too, with or without me.”
She shook her head ever so slightly, her pumpkin hair curling over his shoulder. He had recently dyed it again.
Every now and then Virgil was forced into self-care. That meant Remy would drag him over to his place, give him a little bit of wellness time such as doing face masks and painting his nails. Of course, he would also give her a dye-job when necessary or just wanted. Remy was rather good at it after all. Without him, Virgil would not take such care of himself. It was all Remy’s doing.
“Nu. I will strike. I am not gonna do shit without you. I don’ wanna.”
She mumbled silently, gently hugging Remy closer. He carefully held the feral bastard close.
“You have to. You can do it. If I don’t get in, I will find work where you live and we can move in together and I will clean for you, so you and Logan don’t die.”
The smaller one curled up, his knees pressing against his chest as he put his weight against Remy in ever-persistent patience. A little snort escaped her after all.
When he was not an anxious mess, he got to be more than just the calming friend but also the braincell of the group. He was rational and got things together. No wonder he applied for studies in mechanics.
“You would do that..?”
Virgil pulled back a bit, yet still remained in her little ball of limbs. He was barely covered with his short pants in their plaid pattern. The big jacket was so drastically oversized, Virgil was sitting on it since its length clearly exceeded his height. It was supposed to be worn by someone else so it would not cover them down to their thighs.
Remy gently brushed over his shoulder.
“I would do whatever to be with your sorry ass. If you live on your own and gotta take care of another living being, you will probably just die, like, instantly. You are so fucking oblivious and sensitive after all.”
He gently nudged her.
“Be my wife.”
Remy felt heat rise in his chest. He vehemently shook his head, his stomach fuzzy all of a sudden. Thousands of little feathers tickled him from inside and his cheeks reddened to match his heated blood.
If he did not know better, he would have said that he had done no more but choked on his spit.
“Virgil!”
The illegal little potion of bitter rage hugged him against the playful struggles and shoves from his side.
“Shut up-”, he demanded squeakily, “I am not gonna be anyone’s fucking wife, I am a qUeEN.”
His voice broke at the last word, delicately proving his point in being true royalty of great manners and high levels of taste.
Remy was a true piece of art and he was, as he often repeated, “a luxury few could afford.”
A pair of headlights glanced onto their backs, lighting up the scene when the whole sky was turning dark. Their shadows were drawn out before them, making Remy shrink in on himself and look back to check who or what was approaching them.
The running car engine they could hear made it evident that this was a person rolling around in a vehicle.
Who?
Virgil pushed Remy down onto their blanket, carefully trapping him below her.
“Hey, Em, come in and hurry, we can sacrifice him right now while he is still a virgin!”
Remy threw his hands into Virgil’s face. Ungodly screeches escaped his throat as he pushed and grabbed and tore at the untouchable bastard of humankind.
“You fucking wish! Stop projecting your assless life onto me!”
Finally, Remy pushed his knees into Virgil’s guts and pushed the idiot off his shoulders. Emile had finally gotten out of the car, basket under their arm and a blanket pressed against heir chest.
“Hey, save some dumbassery for me!”, fae complained as they plopped down between the two. Honestly, they felt like those kind of people everyone would comment on about how much they behaved like an old, married couple.
Not that they were wrong.
“I am not duuuumb!”, Remy whined.
He sat up again, shoulders quickly pressing against Emile’s who got comfortable. That bastard was really out there, fucking wearing a leather-like jacket with spikes and shit. He could see the colours on the dark material and could only assume faem to have customised the article.
They were the only one to have covered legs. Black ripped-jeans hugged their endlessly long walking sticks and their feet were covered in worn-out sneakers. Void of any big brand names or associations, of course.
Probably all of this was either made by private businesses, friends, faerself or smaller companies barely anyone knew about.
“Emile, put some sense into her! He is being a real bitch again”
Virgil blew raspberries to the complainer and immediately threw his legs over Emile’s inviting lap.
“If you got an issue with cuddles, you better go and sit on his side”, she challenged silently. Emile did not budge, much to his delight.
“Good bean.”
The newby commented with a little chuckle, gently drawing Emile in by putting one arm around him.
“I got ya two cuties some drinks on the way here. Who wants the coffee and who wants the cotton candy pink whatever capitalism-victim? You two definitely need something to suck on.”
Virgil waved his arms around, stimmy hands flapping like birds’ wings. His long sleeves smacked themselves due to them exceeding his fingers. Her heart was fluttering in sudden excitement. He was aflame like a bunch of dry grass set on fire.
“YES! Gimme gimmeee gimmeeeee!! I want the caffeine!”
She pointed at the basket and reached for it but Remy quickly smacked their sleeves away.
“You are not getting any fucking caffeine, you half-dead junkie zombie, you”, Remy cursed. In a flare of problem-solving skills, he pulled the basket closer, just out of reach from the slightly shorter idiot. He grabbed the caffeine-packed cup of ice-cold sin.
Fae blinked, unimpressed, “Just hand me the chocolate one. Pink unicorn is for our rainbow bunny, then.”
Remy’s smile grew even wider.
Did they say... bunny...?
Virgil pouted in return, her reaction less than ideal. Instead of complaining, his legs pulled them closer by their lap and rested there, snuggled up against the pal with the colourful hair. Not even a beanie this time.
“I am not a bunny”
He slurped up some of the pinkish drink from hell.
It was tasty.
Such a bitch.
How dare it be tasty when he tried to be angry with Emile for giving him free stuff and falsely calling him a bunny when he was clearly a unicorn! Like the drink!
Remy nodded sagely, sensing a bit of mood at this moment.
“Virgil thinks he is a unicorn despite looking like a bunny but that is okay. We still love him.”
His hand sneaked over to her, gently patting her shoulder and indirectly bringing himself closer to Emile in the process.
Not that anyone was complaining.
He was simply slurping his iced coffee in gratitude. It calmed down his hot face and fidgety fingers. Holding the cool cup gave his fingers something to do at least.
For a moment, Emile’s forest eyes looked into his soul. Fae blinked and nodded before turning back to Virgil.
“Virgil, do you feel like a unicorn? Do you identify as one?”
Emile looked at her, carefully brushing over her legs as they attempted to keep eye contact. Virgil looked away, face fully averted.
Fae patiently squeezed his leg.
“If you want me to call you unicorn, I will. I just liked the nickname bunny for you because you jump a lot and are very active.”
Remy smiled. He did not notice but he leaned against Emile’s patient shoulder with his own head.
Fae minded the contact with a little blink and one of faer unoccupied hands moving to take Remy’s.
The pouting smalls still looked away, stubbornly staring at the sky instead of facing the other two idiots.
“You know, I really hate littering, too.”
Virgil cleared her throat, gently hugging her flat stomach a bit. It was not exactly colder than before but maybe by now his open jacket and exposing outfit proved to be impractical for stargazing together.
“If you call me bunny and nobody else, I am okay. And if you mean it as a nice name. Remy too. Even though Remy was a butt about it because I know I am a unicorn, even with ears!”
His voice got a bit louder. Then she nodded in self-assurance to end the sentence and prove a point. He pulled a phone up with him on it, hood over his head, the bunny ears flailing around from the impact of being so harshly moved around.
The small friend snuggled up to Emile and reached out to hold Remy’s hand too.
“You are dumb but you are both okay. You two can call me bunny but I will stab anyone else who tried to do that.”
She huffed softly.
Remy squeezed their hands together and put Virgil’s and Emile’s soft hands together.
“You are our little bunny, then.”
The tallest of the three hummed in thought, their eyes slipping close.
“You guys wanna get high now or later? Because I am ready.”
Virgil shook his head.
“Can’t. I will die.”
Remy nudged Emile so much, it pushed them all against Virgil and had her nearly topple over. She hissed at Remy and angrily glared at him.
“You gotta take a chill pill. I will bring you home with me and the day after. We came in one car anyway.”
Emile looked between them.
“What is the issue? Do you have to go home later?”
Their voice was so smooth and innocent, it felt like talking to a child for just a moment. They both knew there was more than enough wit between these words to take down a whole system.
“I gotta take care of my baby sibling. They are tiny baby and need someone to look out for them.”
Remy shook his head adamantly.
“Logan is, like, 13 and would love to be home alone from your exhausted ass. If you wanna, I will babysit them with Emile. You mind that at all?”
The addressed pal stole a quick glance from Remy for just a moment before looking into the dark night sky.
“It is settled. Virgil, we are officially kidnapping your hot butt and putting you on high duty of being dummy idiotic and free of responsibilities for a few hours. We will take a look at your sibling, too. Promise.”
Virgil let out a whine.
Her hand pushed the now empty cup into the abandoned basket Emile had brought along.
He laid down all over Remy’s and Emile’s long legs in the dramatic flair of imitating death or at least heavy defeat.
“Mmm... will you give me ice cream?”
Emile nodded, gently brushing through her hair.
“I got ice cream at home but we can also buy some just for you if you don’t wanna depend on that.”
The third in their group yipped out a happy sound of agreement.
“We can ask Logan to sleep at a friend’s place or be there with us and wait until they sleep. They go to sleep super early anyway, that nerd.”
The laying swan .. bunny.. uh... unicorn? Shrugged.
“ ‘s kinda cute.. they care about school n all. They are so good. They are too good.”
It sounded like a lament rather than a praise. There was so much pain in these words.
“That sounds nice, bunny. Sounds like your sibling learned a lot of nice things from you. I am sure that must be a lot.”
She took a deep breath.
Remy gave a meaningful nod towards Emile who, in turn, licked faer lips.
“I am proud of you but it is important to rest. Will you let us give you ice cream and take care of you?”
For a moment, the only answer was the bright light coming from the moon. Pale white illuminated the meadow. The stars were shining as always but their light was so far away, it barely reached them. From them, it seemed as if they were not bright at all because the moon was reflecting the light so prettily, it overpowered them all.
“Only if you get dumb with me and we do funny things?”
Remy squeezed their hands together, his second joining the pile of fingers.
“Of course. Now, text your baby sibling.”
The smaller one pulled out his phone and sloppily pulled out a phone.
“Jus do?”
The three got together, packing up their things and obviously taking their things with them.
“What is this?”
Remy followed Emile’s finger pointing at a bag of trash. He shrugged in return.
“We collected trash because Virgil really hates littering, you know?”
The mentioned bean shook his head and shrugged.
“Fuck pollution”, she defended herself as the taller one lead her to the car they shared, “see you in a bit?”
Remy texted Logan with Virgil’s phone and sent an address to their chat with Emile.
“Yo, I sent you the place we are going to drive to. You got that?”
Fae shrugged.
“I can literally just follow you guys like the little shadow I am. Just don’t drive like speeding dicks and I will be fine.”
Remy nodded. Virgil mumbled in agreement and pushed the trashbag into the car’s trunk. It was his car after all. Remy did not have an own car yet. It was more of a shared thing.
Together, they drove over to Virgil. On the way, Logan texted them how they would stay with a friend called Patton. Since Virgil knew Patton more than enough, she did not freak out but instead shrugged it off, told Remy and agreed under the condition of driving Logan there with the others.
Logan.. did not seem to mind.
Did they know Emile would join in?
Whether they did, the three arrived.
Virgil already munched on the space brownies, happily nibbling at the dark chocolatey delight of deep, sweet-bitter taste.
It was an experience.
At least there were no nuts in this.
Well... walnuts would probably be fine..
The three got out, one by one. Virgil first and Emile last.
She patiently took faer and then his hand before leading them over to the small apartment complex with the many little doors. It was a humble little location, the flats looked like miniature versions of actual living spaces for human beings but it was just enough for the modest taste of the tired middle pal of the trio.
He nudged the others towards the building and climbed the stairs.
“The brownies are tasty, Em. You are a real baker genius or.. like, something like that.”
She blinked at the intense lights. One of the white lights was flickering every now and then and it was somewhat bothersome to the eye.
“You ate them already?”
A bit of surprise tinged Emile’s voice. Remy held back a laughter.
“Yeah, Virgil is a thirsty and hungry hoe, no wonder he did that.”
Something in his words screamed “get used to it”. Fae did not know what to feel about this but took it with the humour of a baby adult.
“Not to take advantage of that but I don’t hate that.”
Virgil giggled.
“Shhhh, wait until Logan is gooohne,, They is a really clever baby sib thing, you know.”
More chuckled filled the air and made the stairway echo in giggles and delight from the trio.
They got up eventually, settling on the 7th level where Virgil unlocked apartment C and pushed the door open.
“Yo, I am back! Don’t cook meth, the neighbours will get jealous.”
He dropped the key in a little bowl on a shelf that leaned against the wall for support. The hallway welcomed the trio with faded colours and old, creaking wood planks as ground.
Emile blinked at the floor with a frown.
“Do you want us to keep our shoes on?”
Remy shook his head, his mouth opening to answer but a sound interrupted them.
A voice, more specifically.
“Virgil, please refrain from making comments of such kind. It is highly unlikely for anyone around here to cook methane, let alone you or me.”
A composed voice, stone-faced according to Emile’s feelings, replied to Virgil’s dismissive words and lazy greeting.
The trash was still in Remy’s hands.
“Fuck, I forgot this shit. You mind?”
Logan appeared. Well, it had to be Logan unless Emile had missed about another person living with her - and Logan.
The sibling was younger than Virgil, their face more tan yet somewhat soft and void of the exhaustion the life of emerging adulthood had already put on Virgil’s dark eyes. Especially evident were how there were no bags under Logan’s eyes while Virgil seemed to have never slept in his entire life, perhaps.
Maybe she did not sleep so everyone else could sleep? Like a sandman.
Logan was dressed in something reminding Remy of a suit. It was this undershirt-kinda thing Emile identified as waist coat. It was dark and hugged their slender figure. Blue? It looked pretty much like rather dark blue. They seemed a bit taller than Virgil, around as tall as Remy, almost - not quite. Their shirt was white and looked so ironed out, Emile could not even find a single wrinkle.
They were not wearing shoes but only white socks and long black pants. The waistcoat had a single chain or metal leading to a little pocket.
“Hello Remy, a pleasure to see you again. Do not worry about the bag. I will take it with me on the way down - “
Virgil piped up.
“WE! You are not going alone! It is dark and scary and I am your big shit and am telling you that you gotta hold my hand and be driven to your friend.”
Logan rolled their eyes, dark orbs behind black frames seemingly shrinking in something like annoyance.
However, there was a fond smile on their lips despite it being small. It was still there and when Virgil approached the sibling for a good old hug, they received it and even returned it, even if it was not as passionate.
Something warm pumped through Emile’s face and chest.
Seeing the two siblings cuddle made fae feel all giddy and comfortable.
“Of course. I agreed to your conditions after all.”
Only now Emile realised Logan was wearing a tie. They adjusted it despite it being in perfect position. Nothing was wrong with it..
It..
It had a pattern like constellations on it. Yes, clearly. Fae could see Leo right under their neck.
“Hello, you must be Virgil’s new friend. I am Logan.”
The, the small baby sibling was before faem, hand stretched out and dark eyes looking into faem as if it was a challenge to look serious and convincing.
It was more than effective, to be frank.
“Yeah, I am Emile. Fae/faer, please. You use anything but they/them?”
They nodded a bit, their facial features softening somewhat.
“Thank you”
The words came out like a whisper. Emile smiled.
“Virgil, I am fucking adopting this kid, you have to marry me or some shit. This is now my bastard child!”
A hysterical fit of giggles could be heard while Logan was silently rolling his eyes so hard, Remy swore they moved a bit out of his face’s centre.
Remy pouted audibly.
“Ya get rights on my sibling, I don’t make the rules. Logan, you are loved by these dummies! It is the law, we are your personal protection squad!”
Remy blew out some air but nodded.
“Yeppers, we will do the illegal shit with you to keep you safe. We are gotta fake your a voting ID so you can change the world already.”
The tallest of the pals sucked in a breath.
“I know how to fake a voting ID! I made myself one, too! Hold on!”
Logan turned towards the new person, this Emile guy. The sound of giggles was still around and surely coming closer.
“Hey, hey, make sure to have it be a good fake. Can’t have the good kiddo fuck up a great lifeeee”, she argued, “They will be super fine because they are a great and lovely person. LOGAN I LOVE YOU!”
They closed their eyes instead of rolling them. Their lips curled further into a more than evident smile and a small hint of pink tinted their pale cheeks.
“I l-love you too, Virgil. Please calm down, it is quite alright. I am just me.”
Virgil was back by now, a little box in his hands.
“Shut up, be proud of yourself. You have amazing grades, super engagement in different projects and activities and you are a bright person with great competences. You are trying and working a lot to get this far and I am proud of you. You should be, too. I barely finished school with my shitty grades. It was mostly pity”
Virgil blinked softly. Her hand gently brushed over their cheek and carefully patted its side. Emile and Remy moved out of the way to give the siblings some space. They obviously had a moment going on.
“I don’t care what you make of yourself. I just want you to be happy and proud of what you do. We all know we were not born to be perfect and yet you are here and doing this.. this fucking badassery of ace-ing all ya exams and life shit and all.”
She scooted closer.
“I know Patton likes quiche I make, so I packed some for you two to share. I put money in, too. Get snacks and order something if you two need it, alright? I love you, kiddo. I really do.”
He snuggled up to them and gave their pale cheeks a soft smooch. The elder sibling mumbled softly.
“If you complain about the money, I will bite your nose. Just take it. Financial worries are mine, not yours.”
Logan looked at Virgil, a shadow darkening their pale features. It was like a tree branch in the night, throwing a scary shadow into the room of a young and gullible child.
They abandoned the doubt and shook it off with a new sense of hardness in their eyes. It was sparkling determination.
“Have fun with your friends, please. I want you to take care of yourself, too. You and I both know that a good social life helps your mental health which, in turn, positively affects your overall well-being.”
Virgil blinked, happy beams radiating from her old orbs.
“You are the best sibling I could have ever wished for, Lo.”
She cleared her throat, wiping over her wet eyes.
“Time to fucking get ya to you friend! Ree will drive you and I will have ice-cream like a real champ!”
“REEEE, EEEEEM! Let us gOOOO!”
The middle man came back in, Emile right on his ass.
“You finished your drama? You won’t stab us if we come back in?”
Virgil giggled under the scolding look from his sibling. She shrugged dismissively.
“I am ready to go. I will wait in the car.”
They got pushed the little container into their backpack and put it over their shoulders before grabbing the trash and retrieving the keys from his sibling.
“Nuu, you are a baby and we gotta go with you. Reeeemileeey~ Come with me~”
The two got ready and joined as requested.
“DId you fuse our names?!”
There was an unusual amount of excitement in Emile’s voice. Not that they were not usually excited and happy but this was on a whole new level. There was a sense of knowledge and expectation in faer tone of voice.
It was difficult for Virgil to put her finger on it, considering she started feeling a bit more of an effect from the edibles she had consumed. Remy noted the excitement with his own piece of interest.
“I fuuuused your names and they fit together sooo well!”
As Virgil giggled, Emile’s eyes seemed to double in size, more so the black pools in the middle of these wild orbs.
Remy blinked at this change, his own curiosity swinging into the direction of excitement as well.
He wanted to know about the things that got Emile to bounce on faer feet like the most adorable danger stick in the whole history of humankind.
Something glowed in these mysterious eyes and Remy wanted to know more about it.
Well, for know it was time to take responsibility and drive them all to Patton.
He still wanted to know about it, so he took a chance when they had arrived and the three remained in the car alone, Virgil cuddled up to Emile and holding hands with glowing cheeks and a free heart.
Logan waved goodbye one last time and disappeared into the warm home of a loving family. A whole family.
“Em, what is so exciting about fusions? Do you like those kinda things?”
For a moment, his mind wandered as he tapped his foot down onto the pedals and started driving again in first gear before shifting higher.
He did not have the opportunity to glance into the rear-view mirror and see their face light up like a burning candle. Certainly, if he knew about how much he had missed, he would have cursed his own care about safe driving.
“I L-O-V-E fusions!”
A giggled followed faer sudden spray of words. The excitement pitched their voice into a higher vocal range.
Unexpected but lovely in a way it made Remy’s heart throb with just as much energy as Emile offered him. He let himself giggle a bit while Virgil was nothing but a puddle of chuckles and snickers. The half-naked pal hugged Emile close, seemingly absorbing their enthusiasm.
“Why do you like fusions so much, lovely?”
Remy licked his lips, tasting the delicious energy in the air. He relished in just a quick glance into the rear-view mirror in which he saw Virgil and Emile bonking the sides of their heads together, the latter bouncing a bit in faer seat.
His heart was blooming.
These two were the summer of his life.
“Th.-they !! Do y-you know of-of S-Steve Un-Univ-verse?”
Their hands were everywhere, Remy noticed. Virgil put himself on high-five duty whenever these hands moved places and suddenly appeared next to him or in front of his nose or behind Remy’s head.
To her, it was as if these hands appeared out of nowhere while Emile fawned his happy juices into every direction of this car.
Remy readily took in everything he could with a smile on his lips and promises in his chest. Sadly, he still had to shake his head but he prompted them.
“Enlighten us, would you?”
Fae continued, hands still moving in a somewhat erratic manner.
“S-So in - I .. I mean, y-you know”, they started, then stopped, then started again just to take a short pause.
Faer face fell into a statute-like aesthetic as fae deliberated what to say. The happy glows in their orbs were forever-persistent.
“Mw, Em.. Emiiiiile”, Virgil cooed softly, patting their hair, “You are wonderful.. your.. y... sEt.. pf.. ph-... STEVEN is your FRIEND and really wonderpoof too.”
She nodded, a sense of importance surrounding her. It gave her an expression of wisdom and some sort of... safe space. There was acceptance in his features.
Even when he mispronounced and misunderstood everything going on.
Virgil eagerly patted Emile’s poofy hair while nodding more, her happy curls jumping up and down the sides of her face like excited monkeys.
“So-sO! Steven is-is a human a-and he is part of the-the cry-c..c-crystal gems who are basically alien stones with magic. Oh, and they have weird adventures t-t-together and ev-everything is soft and ni-nice!”
Fae bounced in the back seat and Virgil enthusiastically moved along without even having a single clue of what was happening at the moment.
They clapped and she mimicked the movements with confused nods and delayed yaps.
“Magic Stpehen.. ph..phatven...”
Virgil looked at his hands, confusion spinning in their lost eyes. Maybe staring into her fingers could answer her the question of how it came that “Steven” was so difficult to pronounce.
They did not, if you wondered, too.
Emile smiled, gently brushing through his hair.
The most gentle of all smiles adorned their face as they soothed Virgil ever so patiently. The flapping piece of oversized jacket and mad boxers eventually nestled in faer lap and hugged these legs calmly. Every now and then, Emile would receive a loving pat to their skin because Virgil forgot what they felt like. Or because she was curious about what skin did when being touched and moved and shoved or patted.
They patiently stroked his hair further while Remy had a hard time keeping his gay together and himself focused.
Luckily, they arrived and got back up, Virgil insistently patting and hugging every door, pole and wall they did not pull him away from.
She was a really excited person in this state.
When they got into the apartment, Remy lead them to the couch, considering Virgil was a bit less in the position to know where anything or anyone was.
They snuggled up again, this time Virgil was in the middle and fidgeting with a magic cube.. rubrix.. thingy.. hihi, it felt funny!
“Remy, loook!”
She pushed the cube into his hands and hugged Emile close.
“Magical cube”, Virgil explained, voice mimicking the tone of a captivating conspiracy video.
“Very magical, cube”, fae agreed.
Remy nodded.
“Magical like these rad fucking shits you made. We are gonna see more than stars, we will see an entire galaxy!”
His words were purring in amusement.
Virgil lazily blinked at Remy, then slowly turned to Emile and just.. dropped their head to the side, completely overdoing the “tilting your head” business.
“Sooo.. are we.. a fusion?”
A clank could be heard and suddenly, Virgil whined and hugged the two close.
“The magical cube disappeared! I...m-..magic!”
His voice dropped into the sounds of scary camp fire horror stories once more.
“...m a g i c.”
The tallest of the three pushed another biscuit to Remy who gladly consumed the sweet, spacey treat.
“You are magic, you two fusers”, Emile purred back in reply and gently snuggled back, carefully pecking Virgil. This time, a whine arouse from Remy’s throat.
Emile shook faer head, a wild grin decorating this precious face.
Was that a little scar on their cheekbone? Oh, those cheekbones...
Remy got so lost in Emile’s pretty face, he barely noticed it coming close, Emile’s eyes closing sensually, slowly...
Then, their lips brushed against one another. Lonely mouth and alluring goal meeting and pressing together, closing around one another like embracing lovers after a long period of distancing.
“waHOOOO, G A Y!!”
Virgil cheered for them, leaving the youngest of the three to pull away from Remy, skin like cherry blossoms in the heat of spring.
Fae simply let him, innocently commenting with nothing but a whipping of faer eyelashes towards the shy one.
“Is that new for you, Virgil?”
The playful breeze of something like a rivalry returned, nestling between the moody couple of different extremes. The trio’s shortest and longest member looked at each other, a special dynamic reigning between them and drawing them closer.
“New that he gets the kisses first”, Virgil answered in unabashed honesty.
Instead of hiding behind witty remarks and sarcastic or snarky comments, she off-handedly pronounced the issue and pulled Emile in, gently pulling at the leather collar of this damn self-improved jacket.
It was surprisingly soft, compared to last time, at least.
Their lips were raspberries squeezing together ever so slightly, merely touching more than for a fleeting moment.
Virgil was the one to pull away.
It was Emile’s turn to be flustered at this moment. Fae slowly backed up, settling into faer space on the couch and taking another one of the beaked treats. They nibbled on them, hiding their face while Virgil pushed her legs onto faer lap and rested her head on Remy’s happy thighs. His skirt was rolled up a little so he got to feel his hair.
“You two taste so sweet...”
Remy shrugged, face still ablaze without his knowledge. He suspected it, though.
“Hey, Em. You going to college when the holidays are over?”
The taller one took the moment to appreciate Remy’s timing and tasteful change of topics while Virgil delightfully brushed over his exposed stomach in mild interest.
“I am just here for a summer job, I guess I told you guys”, fae mumbled softly as faer fingers moved to catch up to Virgil’s tracing fingerpads.
“After that I am going to Yban University further up the north. What about you guys?”
Virgil was chuckling and squirming when Emile started stroking his exposed skin.
He was ticklish, Remy remembered fondly.
“Virgil is gonna go up there too, but for working. So you can hang out with Logan if you want to!”
Remy winked and Emile stuck out their tongue at him.
“Don’t fuck the baby sibling.”
The small anger dwarf flailed and gasped.
“Nu, fuck me instead!”
Emile fucking starting to cough up during a weird mix of laughing and choking on his own mind and his partners’ words.
“Not na- now!”, fae gasped out, wiggling a bit but staying in place, more or less.
“Man”, Remy started, softly offering his hand for Emile to hold while his other was still carding through Virgil’s hair, “I will go up and study. It is surreal.”
He blinked.
“Holy fuckening, we are going to the same spot! I will move in with Virgil, like, fucking literally. As soon as I get my acceptance email and letter.. I .. I am.. gonna.. I will fuck your landlord.”
Emile was playing with their hair while stroking over these exposed legs.
“You two.. wanna hang out if we all end up in the same spot? That would be cool.”
Remy patted the spot close to him and gestured towards Emile, then back to the spot as he started to lay down. They got the message and followed suit.
Together, the three cuddled up, now laying and still high off their butts.
“It is perfect”, Em yawned, gently kissing the back of Remy’s hand.
Virgil nodded softly and pushed her nose against the other two pals’ noses.
“If you guys are with me, I can do all. I will get all done. I can do it.”
At least he tried saying that. His words came out as a jumble of weird sounds.
Laughter erupted and Virgil snuggled up, eyes closed and gently smooching the two before drifting off to sleep while the others whisper-screamed whatever thing seemed absolutely hilarious at the moment.
If they would stay together, she knew they would all be fine. They would all make it.
Warming Paws and Melting Walls (2/8) “The Naming of the Beast”
Summary: Remy gets home, his day unusually long and body extremely exhausted. Still, he and the cat seem to get along a bit better as they share a bit of time bonding in their weird states.
Tags: mentions of the vet (+ aftermath), abandoned cat, alcohol/wine, tipsy Remy (being a soft man), food/ meat, pain killer mention, drinking, dummy logic, dummy thicc fucking Remy, Remy the cat whisperer, mentions of Kim Kardeshian.. shien..? idk man, slight mention of systemic oppression bc wow Remy is spilling the beans, name talks, cuddling, snuggling, books, mentions of vaccines, soft insults bc Remy, purposefully horrible old english.
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Story under the cut! (Wordcount: ~3,5k)
It was late when the kitty cat and Remy returned and in all honestly, the receptionist was more than exhausted and done with everything. The whole day had taken a toll on him and interacting with people under bright lights was obviously not the best for a person with photo-sensitivity and self-diagnosed bitch syndrome.
His body was hurting, the pain had gotten more intense and rendered him a heavy and sleepy mess. He still needed to feed the cat. While the pain killers had done some to ease his pain, the extra activity had him feel like absolute trash, after all.
At least, the vet had found the little queen to be healthy and taken good care of. It indicated that there were owners or strangers to take care of the kitten but there were no tattoos, no marks or anything. Whatever care the cat had received before, it seemed to be over now. Nobody was looking for the cat as far as the vet and the local pet shelter have told him.
To make sure the cat would be okay, he got scheduled appointments for vaccinations (the kitty cat already got some that day). In like, a month, he was supposed to come back. Considering the cat was about one year old, it was time to refresh vaccinations anyway, at least that is what the vet said. There was so much information smoking in his brain and it hurt him. It was extra weight putting his head down.
There was no chip for the kitten.. He would set up an ad on-line to show that the cat was found. He and the vet assume the cat to have run away from home or having been left behind after the family moved. Something like that.
Still, he could try so the cat would not really be his problem anymore. There was obviously no name tag or collar. He would have noticed, he is not that fucking dense. The vet, too.
At least Remy got some answers for what the fuck this kitten should eat and could not ever eat because it could hurt.
Also, the cat was a she. Well, too fucking bad Remy settled for they/them pronouns. While he talked to the cat, he could at least practice pronouns he usually did not use much. The cat could not get offended. Totally a win-win situatuon.
The coffee lover curled up on the couch, kitty cat still somewhat drowsy in his lap.To be honest, the cat felt drunk to him, so Remy did not know better but to nurse his own wine while giving the kitten some chicken he had gotten for them.
“Queen, you are a really really unbelievable thing”, he started as he looked at the tiny void in his lap that was currently chewing on a last bit of chicken pieces.
He had removed all that bone stuff and washed off the meat before to make sure it was not seasoned or too greasy and such for the kitten. Totally no need to kill the poor thing when he could just be fucking careful and mind their needs and limits.
“You know, you get all hot on those funny things and you are living with me now - without paying rent - and like, you do not even give me your a name. You are, like, the most mysterious person I have ever met. Fucking rude, you little harlot.”
Remy sipped a bit of his wine and placed the package on the table. Yes, he drank wine out of a package because he was a cheap person. He needed to pay off the flat he had bought because his job did not make the most money ever. At least it was enough for him having a somewhat cozy and stable life.
He carefully shifted under the warm weight of the warm fluff. Remy was so glad the vet cleaned the cat so he did not need to do that. Was that extra service? He definitely paid for this shit, not gonna lie. Well, he would get a bill eventually and then he could still get upset over that. Ultimately, it did not matter right? He had some savings and the cat would be gone soon because it was someone else’s kitty cat.
It was not even in his place to just cuddle with the kitten while watching some bitch flick. But now that he had to ditch his weekend routine for the cat, they had to suck up for it. Also, he was just in a ton of pain by now and hoping for the local wine package to just knock him out well enough. If his senses were numbed, so were his pain receptors because brain foggy when Remy drunk-y.
“Listen up, kitty cat. We might need a name for you, darling”, he started and looked down at how they were licking over their muzzle and nose.
The meal was done and the cat seemed satisfied... The little tongue looked so cute, it was so so pink.
“I mean, maybe you already have a name but calling you queen all the time ..”, he trailed off and shrugged, “you know, don’t know whether you, like, deserve that title to be a name. It is something you earn and live, but you are not just some queen. Except when you are some fucking royal but who the fuck cares about that shit.”
The cat looked up at him and he vaguely looked back before sticking his tongue out and gently brushing through the soft fur of the little monster of coal he sheltered.
“Yeah, right. Fuck the Queen. It is not the same as you being a queen. Anyway, it would kinda not be the same for you to be a queen and to be Queen. You know?“
Remy chuckled as the kitten pushed its head against his ribcage.
“You totally get me, don’t you?”
The kitten meowed in reply and he continued to pet the little ball of softness. The little one even smelled great. Well, now.
“Okay, let us give you a name that fits you. I don’t know, honey. Something fancy but also classy because it is you”, he giggled, “I don’t know but we will find something!”
Remy gently picked up the little kitten and hummed as he stumbled over to the bookshelves. His wine was abandoned and the small void simply meowed in response to his actions.
“You know what, fuck that show. They all suck anyway, honey. Reality TV is just a nice background .. nice, like.. what else would people watch Kim Kardeshian for? Genuine interest? Gurl, it is all about the sounds and sights or plainly being the malicious bitch to gossip and ridicule these people.”
He giggled and settled before the bookshelf, sitting there with the little queen on his arms. Was queen a title, now? Not a name but somehow some kind of pet name, huh.
“You know what, kitty?”, he whispered and the cat shook their head at the sudden sounds and the wet breath Remy offered. They pushed their little head against the man’s collar bone.
“I am that kinda bitch to do all the heavy gossiping.”
He laid down and let the cat rest on his chest. His back was pressed against the dark floor in his reading corner. The curious little cloud looked around and stood up, tail curiously moving from one side to the other. Then it stayed and moved in slow-motion before returning to the other side while staying kinda between low and horizontal.
Cats were so cute.
And the cat really looked like a cloud.
A dark one.
Not a black sheep, a black cloud!
“Storm cloouUuUuUd”, Remy sang softly and the cat turned back to him, letting out a responsive sound in reply.
They understood him! Or were at least annoyed enough to react and give him a “what the fuck” look with all the sassy cat-ness in their bi-coloured orbs.
“Aw!! You react! But that is a long way to go, still, you brooding little dust ghost.”
He blew a little bit off of the cat’s head and brushed it off to make sure it was all clear. Maybe from the chicken or the couch.
He had to cleaaaan, ew. Woooork.
Bad cat. They really be spreading the dust around like a little ghost.
Damn it, he only wanted to find some nicknames for the small being.
“Cat, can’t you do the work for me? I mean, come on, I totally got you to the vet and you got drugged for free. That is a real favour to do for a stranger, gurl.”
The cat looked back up at him.
Oh, how could he have forgotten about that??
“Bitch!”
Remy exclaimed wildly and sat up, simply to fall back into the ground with a dull ‘thud’ accompanying his motions. The insides of his head seemed to be forcefully shrunk together and the tipsy man groaned in annoyance. The pain was so fuzzy and far away, it was basically a street sign on the other side of the street during a day of heavy fog.
All he did feel was the heaviness of his head and the horrible throbbing that came right after he limply dropped into the hard wood again.
“uh… Aw, I am the dumb bitch, here. Kim, save me”, he weakly slurred.
Obviously, he was in about the greatest state to take care of another being, especially one that was just as drowsy as him and slowly processed his sudden movements with flinches away from him.
When the man did not move, the curious guest nudged Remy’s nose with their own.
Had the coffee lover seen it, he would have swooned, probably.
Well, on the other side, he slowly got himself together and carefully shifted again, this time being considerate of his own and the kitty’s needs. He was much slower, lethargic in a way, it would make Sloth itself jealous.
Eventually, he was in position, vision still blurred with blackish spots tainting his view on the dimly lit apartment.
“So- as I was saying… wait”, he started yet trailed off soon after, voice quieting down and light eyes closing.
“uh.. yeah, I know where I left off. So, as I was, uh, saying.. Like, bitch! You are totally as tipsy as I am with all those killers in ya, big boi.”
Once more, his own giggles filled the room while the cat just pushed their head against his chin. The creature somewhat vibrated a bit and it felt oddly funny to Remy. Indescribable sounds came from the little kitty cat. It did not sound like a Queen, not really. It was more like uh.. a cat. Nothing else Remy has ever heard sounded quite like that.
“You uh.. you still need a name, you little void egg, you. Hihi.“
Remy curled and gently cradled the black ball closer. His grip around the cat was secure yet loose. The cloud of nothingness was comfortably sunk into his arms as the man got onto his wobbly legs and moved his jelly sticks closer to the little corner of books and boxes once more.
The kitten did have more than just great taste to hide there when they first started exploring some shit around his flat.
Their flat?
… uhh.. the doc said to look for the original owners.. oh man, he still had to do that on top of all the things he had to do. And he did not even know whether it was worth it but it was much better than just giving the cat over to some shelter.. uh.. cat thingy.. cat orphanage?
Cat orphanage. Sounded like a totally valid word. Yes, Remy, the name was, like, totally not sanctuary. Absolutely it was not. You fucking genius.
The kitten was snuggled up to Remy’s chest, acutely unaware of the change of environment that slowly came around with Remy wandering off their spot to really dive into the corner of his secret reading delights. He was back on the oriel, the space were the floor was not any dark wood anymore but instead carpeted in wine red. This was the only piece of floor in his home that had a little bit of carpet and it just started with a provisional glass door he had put there with more than just a little effort.
Basically, this little corner was a glass globe library with the perfect sight on the snowy streets and other weather conditions throughout life. Due to architecture, he basically had a built-in bench because some oriels build a “dent” into the home which can be used as some kind of elaborate and excessively broad window sill.
It was worth all the work he had put into it.
Whenever he came in to read, it was calm and silent, it was warm but easily adjusted by opening the windows or turning on the heating (considering he did not live in the warmest region on earth at all. In fact, he lived in a more moderate climate and enjoyed the tendency towards coolish temperatures. Despite climate change, there was still snow early in the winter months).
The two curled up on the floor, leaning against a beanbag. Remy was leaning against the beanbag, to be specific. The kitten was curled up on Remy, cuddling into his arms like the hazy bitch they were. The Queen could barely process anything but well, steady ground it was.
Remy was resting on the bean bag, the cat silently meowing at the change of softness around them when the home-owner slowly turned his body for the kitten to slide against the bad with him.
Maybe the cat liked it. Nobody could know anything because the cat was out of it and also, cats were hell-spawns who were not to be understood but worshipped only.
A book was resting in Remy’s lap. When did he pull it there? He did not remember. Maybe it had just settled with him, flying over or whatnot.
The book was one hell of a beast.
Pages upon pages were stacked on top of one another and bound together in the obscene creation of a whole book that held knowledge, big enough to rival a human brain in size - at least when putting this knowledge onto pages in barely readable fonts and size.
“Yo, cat. We need a name for ya, honey.”
He let his head roll to the side and then back into position again. The void looked over at him and seemed to shrug. Maybe Remy was imagining things.
“Uh.. You can’t read that for me, now, can you? Why do people even get cats, man. Like, no offence but is that not why we have human beings? So we socialise and uh .. uh like.. taaaalk and hate one another. Cuz we totaaally need that kinda interaction.”
His voice let the words blend in together, the muffled sentence barely resembling different words or sounds but instead one big hum. Useless blabber, at most. Not that the pet would understand him if he was putting proper effort into talking like a sober and completely sane person.
“Caaat. Caaaat, just learn reading? Give yourself a name, gurl. Independence!”
Yeah, well.. This seemed not to work, in fact, it obviously resembled a fruitless endeavour instead. Much like teaching a donkey how to sow greens, the cat took up Remy’s words and ignored them skilfully. Even in his tipsy mind, he was well aware that an animal would not just magically learn reading and then read out to him. However, the wishful thinking was still in his heart… and his foggy dummy mind.
He reverted to child-like attention spans and reasoning abilities whenever he got to drink just a bit more than a little. And honestly, the wine got a little to him, especially with this bottomless void eating, like, all of this fucking chicken.
He mumbled something about sharing under his breath before he pulled the book closer and heaved it open with his weak noodle power. There was not that much energy left in his heart. He was tipsy and as soft as molten butter.
The book groaned as it was opened, awakening the pages of knowledge from deep slumber.
It willingly dropped the front and backside onto Remy’s lap. It spread like a good partner for the intimate deeds. The excitement of being handled and warmed by a knowledge-seeking person got to it and drove the book to reveal just the right passage for them.
“Names.. Names. Kitty cat, pick a name.”
“mrrrow..?”
“Yeah, hoe, but like, you’re a Queen.. to me and not to others so how about you lemme pick a name, so the mortals can give you their foolish attempts of daring to raise their voice at you without spoiling your title, you void hoe.”
The cat gave him a slow-motion blink of two eyes. These wonderfully coloured eyes.. How were cats allowed to just have such precious gems as eyes. Like.. did he rob some jewellery store thing.. did they have names again, he felt like they had some kinda name and he was supposed to know this and all.
Uh, he would be clever later.
“Alright. This is a name dictionary thing. Like, for when you get a baby and you need to name that little shit, so the system can discriminate against it. It gives you names, you know. You have them according to the alphabet which is a linguistic attempt at bringing order into the way we communicate and organise shit. By the way, this is totally lame because language is fucking liv- ah, uh.. alive. That’s the bitch I was looking for.”
Remy suppressed a burp before he allowed himself to continue.
“Can you .. can you just paw this thing?”
The cat did not move. Uh.. He carefully nudged the little monster. A lazy glare was thrown his way but this is where it stopped. Such a lazy hoe. They would be the bestest of friends very soon.
Seriously, kitten? Not even some dumbass meow sound or whatever? Wow, okay. Selfish much.
He groaned.
Now we was getting upset with a little cat. He made it this far in his life. Instead of diving deeper into any negative feelings, he moved himself. His finger gently tapped onto the paw once more and softly stroked it before putting it onto the page.
“Oh, mine own dearest liege, I has't did summon all the fucks i has't hath left to giveth and ‘t wast enow to maketh.. this miracle! Uh - thou hath moveth thy fucking paw. ”
…Not even that did get the cat to as much as meow at him. At LEAST the void monster spared him a glance of annoyance for his effort. Valid, valid. At least some feedback, thundercloud. Yet, the moment was gone as soon as it came and the kitten then dropped the whole thing and looked down again.
Some sorta ritual to close their eyes and nap away. Even the cat had better living habits than he did.
“Nonononono, dun nap jus yeeeet! V-V … uh..”
He had taken up the name from the book, accepting the fate of the paw and started looking into the decision of the higher spirits. He was ready to act up on whatever the heavens and skies and all that shit have decided for the cat to be named.
The man squinted at the pages.
The top of it said “V”, so he knew that this was the start for their name now. Of course the Queen would be such a diva and end up with a name as unique as starting with such a rare letter. Totally Extra :tm:.
To be fair.. who the fuck used those letters anyway, man.. xylophone? Laaaaaaaaaaaame. Virginia, Voltron, V-.. V…
“Virgil”
Remy blinked.
He blinked multiple fucking times.
The name did NOT, unlike his mind’s stupid expectation, suddenly change into something like, uh, you know,… Jared. Some funny shit.
No, it was still this name. Virgil.
“Is that even a name for a cat who I declare to be gendered in the neutral only? Uh, you know.. whatever, like, it is whatever because you are a QUEEEEEENG.. Queen.. a queen. You just un-rule gendered names. They are stupid anyway, guuurl. Fuck this all.”
“Queen Virgil! Now how does that make you feel, huh?”
The kitten gave him another blink and finally retreated their paw.
“Yeah, my little nightmare goat. We are gonna go nap all night, all day!”
The man giggled again. Then he made sure to just give up and fall asleep like that, curled up on a beanie, kitty cat fur tickling him and doing nothing to facilitate his breathing. All he breathed in was ai- uh.. No.. Virgil’s fur.