#riam

[dapsie]

british people arent real

[didiwaffles]

TEARS

Scope for Fantasy Devi x Riam SCOPE FOR FANTASY MASTERPOST - coming soon...

CW: mlw, hurt/comfort, angst WC: 1.1k

She sat silently, and only quiet sobs from time to time and slight shaking of her shoulders reminded that she's been crying relentlessly for hours now. Riam has been holding her close, his cheek pressed against the top of her head. It did soothe her, but tears still refused to stop.

"I thought you were over your past," she was quietly asked, but she only shook her head.

"To be over my past, I had to accept a simple fact: time does not, in fact, heal. So I had to learn to accept that pain as the part of me, a crucial part, in fact, and learn to live with it, but facing it head-on, being thrown into the pond of those memories, having them wash over me, it hurts just as much as it hurt all the way back when it happened."

She looked at Riam and he pulled away slightly. Devi got up.

"He was right. Seeing him suffer did not bring me happiness. Not at all."

"Maybe that's for the best," Riam said. Devi turned her head slightly towards him. He continued. "It means you're still you. Don't you think it takes a special kind of fucked up and twisted soul to truly take enjoyment in others' sufferings?"

Devi paused for a bit then shrugged as she turned to leave. "Maybe you're right."

As the door closed behind her, it was quiet for a bit. Then Riam sighed and got up. He didn't say it, but his heart was bleeding too. Not only seeing his love hurt and be unable to help in any meaningful way was killing him, but knowing that he himself was the source of her pain... And no matter how many times she says that it wasn't his fault and he couldn't do anything, she said it right - it will never go away. But he couldn't say anything. It would be insensitive and would only hurt her more. Her pain was worse. She was what mattered. Him? He can take it. He is a man. The Man. As he opened the door to follow her, he understood that she would be most unhappy with the way his thoughts flew. But thankfully she was busy enough to read them, thus he could safely continue ignoring the voice of reason in his head.

She was standing by the window. Riam couldn't quite see her face clearly, but he did see the way her tears glistened under the starlight. He came up to her quietly.

"I'm okay," she said, trying to suppress the quivering in her voice.

"Liar." Riam put his arm over her shoulder.

A tear rolled down Devi's chin and splattered over her chest. "Damn right I am." She sniffed and held herself in her arms. "They just won't stop," she said. "No matter what, they keep streaming down, but..."

"But..?" Riam pulled her close, wrapping his arms around her.

"I don't feel... You know how when you cry, your eyes are burning, and you don't feel relieved at all, you just feel empty, and you end up feeling even worse... You know? Well, I don't feel that. I feel... good? Even though I can't stop crying, I feel... So light, actually." She looked up at him. "Maybe it's 'cause you're with me." She smiled, making more tears stream down her face.

Riam hugged her tightly and put his chin on top of her head. They stood quietly like that, gazing at distant stars. Riam tried to remember the last time he let himself cry.

Right, when was the last time he even cried..?

Looking into his childhood, the earliest memory Riam had was of his mother. He definitely cried a lot in her arms. He remembered how she'd always pat his head ever so gently saying that he must be strong.

When she died, he didn't cry. He remembered that clearly. All he felt was burning rage. And helplessness. And that rage burnt him all out, leaving nothing but complete emptiness in its way. He was way too young for this.

He didn't cry for a very long while after that. He matured way too early for a child, so when he met the man who would declare him his son, he was only too happy to let go of his presumed "strength" and get back the childhood that was taken away from him.

Until he got senpai killed. He cried for days back then. Of course he did - he was still 8. But he had to mature a lot after that again - the crew needed him to. Father needed him. And so he did, once again.

Then, when he was only 13, he had to watch his father getting executed. He cried. Yes, he cried, just barely able to stop himself from screaming. He just kept losing people dear to him.

Then... life went on. Riam thought, as hard as he could, but he could no longer pinpoint a single time he would cry. Not when his heart would break in pieces, not when it was ready to burst from happiness. Not stressing for his brother's life, not happy for his friend's dream coming true. Not watching the love of his life's heart being torn to shreds, not being finally able to touch her lips. Nothing could make him cry. For so long...

He looked up at the starry sky. After the crunches behind him, Devi's voice was gradually getting closer. "Okay, okay, I'm done now, did I make you wait long? Sorry, sorry, couldn't decide on the dress. Speaking of, does this blue suit me? I think it gives a weird tint in this lighting. I-"

"Devi."

"-think- huh?" Though Riam's voice sounded rather quiet compared to Devi's loud happy one, she immediately dropped the train of her babbling as she heard her name. She lightly got close to Riam, looking into his eyes. "What's up?"

"I think I forgot how to cry."

"Yeah, sure! I- whuh?!" She took a bit to actually process his words, but when she did, her eyes opened wide, looking at him from below. "Wait, what did you just say?" Her voice suddenly got softer, almost a whisper.

Riam kept looking up. "I can't remember crying since father died. I think... I can no longer cry if I tried."

Devi's expression changed. She looked concerned now. "That's... That's not good... All emotions are important! If you can't cry..." She stopped herself from continuing. She leaned closer to him. "Sweetheart..."

He finally looked down on her. "Yeah. I might be... actually doing worse than I thought."

"We need to talk," Devi said, her voice almost inaudible behind the sound of waves crashing against the shore.

Riam sighed. "I guess... Can I pick a spot for the date, then?" Devi nodded. Riam huffed with a smile. "Your dress looks beautiful on you under this lighting by the way."

Devi blushed slightly and giggled. "Oh, you-!"

[theirishaesthete]

Another Light Hand

No.36 Westland Row, Dublin and its exquisite neoclassical plasterwork has featured here before (see A Light Hand « The Irish Aesthete) Home for more than 150 years to the Royal Irish Academy of Music, the building was originally constructed in 1771 as a private house but in the 19th century, like so many others, became used for commercial purposes. Somehow, its interiors remained intact, not…

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[mrsrys]

Miss Americana and The Heartbreak Prince

Keep up with the series here.

Present

Riley felt the handcuffs tighten against her skin when the guards finally dropped her in her knees in front of her father.

His face was completely white. She couldn’t say what was coming. She hasn’t ever seen that look across his face. He wasn’t exactly upset or angry, it was almost like he expected it to be a nightmare. But it wasn’t.

-Tell me, Riley. Tell me it is not true – and there he was, a strong 195cm man looking terrified at his 27y daughter – Tell me he abused you. Tell me anything – his cold eyes searched hers. He was begging. Almost like we would prefer if she just lied to him.

Maybe she should. This game had already gone too far. She could just say it was a mistake and maybe he was going to believe because he wanted to. But both of them knew it. Riley wasn’t playing by her family rules anymore.

-I can’t say it – Riley finally looked at her father eyes. It was just getting darker – It is true. I am carrying Liam Rys’ child.

She could have lied, but she could never erase the last two year of her life. And honestly, she didn’t want to.

Two years ago. New York City.

[chapterbychapter2021]

𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝚍𝚊𝚛𝚔𝚎𝚜𝚝 𝚖𝚒𝚗𝚍𝚜

Liam (to Ruby): Ruby doesn’t know I’m high

Ruby: Your high?

Liam: … sorry

Liam (to Chubs): Ruby doesn’t know I’m high

[callum-hunt-is-bisexual]

it's always 'ily' and never 'ii-ilt.itili-idkwh,wh,bilay,ila,ailysm.nboays,od,oaaa.ilay,aijl,aitm.itmwiwdfy.pyhttmtminc.pjlam.'

[allthesepurplelights]

# 1 year of LP1

favorite collaboration: For You with Rita Ora

[rangergranger11]

You and me? Inevitable.

Liam Stewart, The Darkest Minds