for the dark urge ask game <3
(questions from this post)
(also prefacing these by saying i am not known for being very good with words and making sense of my thoughts lol)
What circumstances led to your Dark Urge becoming their Class/Subclass?
so, ronen is an oath of vengeance paladin, and it's kinda like. you'd think it'd be impossible for any paladin durge to keep their oath pre tadpole right? and the oathbreaker knight does mention in game that they saw each other a lot before. so what i think is, ronen chose to be a paladin partially as kind of a cover, a way to be able to exist outside of the temple without people questioning him too much, and a way to give him easy access to non culty things when he needed it. and i said partially before because i also think maybe a small, mostly subconscious part of him was trying to resist even then. despite all that i do think he and mr oathbreaker knight saw each other Very Often.
4. What would your Dark Urge consider to be their greatest flaw? Is this accurate?
hmmm. the thing about ronen is, his guilt levels are astronomical. so i think, to him, his biggest flaw and failure is what he believes to be his inability to handle the urges better. he thinks himself to be weak willed, because if he wasn't he could've resisted more, fought back more, and maybe if he had alfira would still be alive. and then the fact that her death at his hands affected him so much to the point that it kinda paralyzed him, he thinks he should've been able to handle that better too. he hates how much and how deeply things affect him.
and as for if that is accurate, i'd say not really. i think he did fine considering everything lol. and this would be far from his biggest flaw
11. What motivates your Dark Urge to either embrace or resist the Urge?
ronen resisted the urge the whole time. or as much as he could anyway. and this might be kind of a basic answer but he just. wanted to be good? he woke up with no memories, and with just a few things on him, including the book with the oath of vengeance tenets. so if he's a paladin then he must be good, right ? good and righteous. but then all evidence kept pointing to the contrary and that was really messing him up. it felt wrong. he felt sick at how much he enjoyed being violent, how much he enjoyed killing and how much he loved the taste of blood in his mouth. whatever he was before, he didn't want to be it anymore. (that said, he still enjoys violence and killing and probably always will)
and then it's also that he wanted some sense of control. he hated not being in full control of himself and not being able to predict his own movements and his own thoughts. whether good or bad, he doesn't want to be a puppet to any urge or father or god. he wants to be free and to belong to himself only.
21. What are 2-3 songs that your Dark Urge would relate to?
oh boy i have a whole playlist (its very unfinished) but 3 songs from it are:
family tree (intro) by ethel cain
worn by king woman
somewhere i belong by linkin park
thank you so much for asking !!!
