Room 4, part 3 - Nicky's Room
Poem in italics is When You Come - Maya Angelou
Pic mood board for Nicky's Room
THE Nicholas Scratch song of ALL time: Fiddler's Green - The Tragically Hip (I use a lyric in my tags whenever I post things about him. That shit haunted me when I made the connection way back in October).
When you come to me, unbidden,
Beckoning me
To long-ago rooms,
Where memories lie.
"Don't you want to ask about the things you don't know about me yet?"
Vidal whispered into Agnes ear as she kept her head forward, lips on the detective's earlobe. She heard Agnes sigh loudly and sink back into the plush red seat. They were still at the Red Room. Vidal had gotten up to take a seat in Agnes' lap; facing her. Agnes instantly felt the pang of arousal shoot through her lower abdomen as she felt Vidal's bulge under her dress running against her jeans.
"Aren't you curious, Agnes? Don't you want to know?"
Another shaky sigh as Vidal felt Agnes fingers creep onto her waist, holding her down on top of her. She heard Agnes swallow hard, preparing herself and her words to fly out of her mouth.
"Who did you have before me?"
"Jealous?"
"No...no, I just...figured you-"
"Oh, you figured. That's why you ask, Baby."
Agnes closed her mouth and felt the slight grind onto her from Vidal; pressing into her own toy between her legs. She hissed as she slammed her eyelids shut. Vidal kept going without mercy.
"I...I didn't mean to assume I just...what you're capable of..."
Vidal smirked before biting down gently onto Agnes' earlobe. She had the detective exactly where she wanted her.
"It's an inherent, natural response to just how good you make me feel...I act this way because of you..."
Vidal whispered once more and felt Agnes shiver against her. The agent could feel the blunt nails of Agnes dig into her hips a little harder.
"But before, not many. None who held my interest long enough for anything serious...they were more to practice with than anything else..."
Agnes blew out another unstable breath now from her mouth. She pulled her head back until it hit the back of the seat with caused Vidal's mouth and teeth and lips to pull away from Agnes' ear. They sat looking at it each other; chipping away at one another in a painfully slow fashion.
"Why don't you ever talk about him?"
Vidal's words made Agnes go ice cold. The look in her eyes changed; the lust evaporating as quickly at it had clouded over her. Fingers dug a little deeper, not in want but in infliction, in hurt. Vidal kept staring, waiting.
"He's dead."
"He wasn't always."
"I thought this was all about you?"
"It is all about me...don't you get that?"
But she didn't. Agnes couldn't wrap her head around the meaning, what Vidal was trying to get at. She felt uncomfortable now; not expecting to dig up all those feelings all over again. Not here, anyway.
"Death. You're not the only person who's lost things, Agnes. Don't you understand that? People lose things everyday."
"Things? Don't you mean people?"
And Vidal shook her head somberly. How hard would she have to push for Agnes to understand? What wasn't clicking in her head?
"You go about things so...physical, Agnes. That's you. Material, tangible. You want to be able to sink your teeth into something and feel the flesh pull and the blood pool. You want to stick your fingers into places where you know you'll feel a pulse. Bruises, scars..."
Agnes' eyes widened as she stared at the agent. She was listening now, paying attention as those words hit her in the heart like a goddamn knife. Twisting and pushing deeper with Vidal's hand around the handle.
"You can lose things you can't grasp, too. Thoughts, feelings, emotions. Sensations that you can not feel or can not hold. Experiences that you may or may not have lived. Have you ever missed a sunset? The way joy feels? We should be able to make rooms for those, too?"
"Fuck you."
"No, Agnes. Why do you have a room for him at home? Like a tomb in our house. Why do you hide him if you love him so much?"
Agnes used her fingers, her hands to push Vidal off of her, but the agent held fast, sat tightly. Like a scared animal, Agnes was trying to flee. Like a smart hunter, Vidal set her trap.
She moved in as quickly as she could and found Agnes' mouth with her own. Surprisingly, the detective didn't push or pull away but gave in. She always did. She didn't know how to help herself whenever Vidal gave her the option. Tongue and teeth; messy and raw, they kissed one another, and Agnes felt the need to moan into Vidal's mouth then. She was trying to give her an explanation this way.
Offering me, as to a child, an attic,
Gatherings of days too few,
Baubles of stolen kisses,
Trinkets of borrowed lovers,
Trunks of secret words,
Room 4 was as cold as a tomb when they stumbled back inside of it. Agnes closed the door softly behind herself and locked it; forcing them to stay. Vidal slipped off her shoes and her dress; slinking to the floor in a heap. Agnes couldn't help but stare at the delicate mix of feminine and masculine that was Vidal. She had never asked her about that either.
Agnes followed Vidal's lead as she too undressed for the night. Boots kicked off, and pants ripped down; shirt tossed up and away onto the floor. Where Vidal was delicate, Agnes was rough. An unspoken set of roles between them. She had never asked her about that either.
Onto the bed, the two of them crawled, moving to their respected sides that they had taken months ago now. They knew their places in intimate settings, around each other. They knew where their pieces fit without having to announce them. She had never asked her about that either.
Vidal's hand found Agnes' under the covers and gave a tight squeeze. She was tired, and her eyes sore from the burning crimson all around them, that was the Red Room. Her emotions shot; body sore. Fingers felt bloody and raw with how much she had to pry Agnes open. Of only she could find that spot that unlatched; like a spring trap. Vidal sighed into her pillow and Agnes brought her other hand to move the hair that had fallen into Vidal's face.
"Maybe I want those pieces of you hidden...like those pieces of Nicky because then...then I can't forget or lose the things I love."
Vidal sighed softly as she shifted closer to Agnes, the back of her legs flush to the front of Agnes' body. That hand moved from her face now to try and wrap under her, around her. Pulling her close as if Agnes was going to take her under her skin.
"You'll forget. You keep it locked up and hidden and the door closed for too long, Agnes...you'll forget."
Vidal drifted in and out of sleep; felt the weight of her life pull her in deeper. The death, the loss. Unspoken words and misused feelings. She sank until she felt Agnes' strong arms every now and again pull her back up.
She had never asked her about that either, how she could be so gentle yet so strong.
I CRY.












