"Vanessa Rojas. I'll be damned," a deep male voice says behind her, amusement lacing his voice. She turns around without thinking, and when her eyes look up to meet his, she has to blink fast to make sure it's him.
"Kevin…hey," she whispers out in shock.
It's really him, all bright eyes and broad shoulders that fit his deep blue uniform jacket nicely.
"It's been…" she starts, shaking her head slowly, but stops short of saying just how long.
"Way too long," Kevin fills in for her. And he's right. Who knew that four years could feel like a lifetime?
OR
Four years after Vanessa leaves Intelligence, she bumps into Kevin at a police gala. An invitation for a drink turns into catching up with each other, shared laughter, flirting...until they decide to make up for lost time.
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works
OMFG- I THOUGHT SHE WAS JUST GOING TO BE MENTIONED!! THIS ARTICLE BETTER NOT BE SOME KIND OF SICK JOKE- NO IM LITERALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO THIS I CANT EVEN-
Apart from Upstead are there any other One Chicago ships you like? 🙂
I don’t mind Burzek, I just don’t ship them like I do Upstead. They really need to get their shit together, a.k.a. the writers need to have them get their shit together.
I also like to believe that if Vanessa was still around, her and Kev would have been a couple at some point and I definitely would have shipped the hell out of them.
Angst 10 for Rowater, requested by @upsteadx. And this is pure angst, because that's where my brain is at rn.
"Do you even still love me?"
--
It was the first real fight they'd had since they decided to make this relationship work, and Vanessa stared at Kevin in dawning horror.
"Repeat that?"
"Do you even still love me? You were gone for months, and I know we couldn't communicate, but I still love you. And now you're back and we're barely talking and it feels like you're waiting for me to leave. If you want me to go, tell me and I'll go."
She felt like she'd been shot in the chest without a vest as she looked up at him. His voice was so clear. He didn't want this? He didn't want them?
"You kept me going while I was under. When I had to smile and pretend that I was María Lopez, not Vanessa Rojas. That I was into all of that. But knowing the op would end? That you were waiting? Kevin that's all I had keeping me going and you did that. I love you." She took a breath. "But if you don't want this that's fine. I'll cope. I'll have to."
Vanessa turned around, sadness filling her heart as she went to his bedroom and started grabbing her things from the drawer he'd given her. It didn't take long, and she texted Hailey asking could she come over. The response of Jay's here, but of course came through and Vanessa sighed but nodded.
Kevin hadn't come into the room as she packed, and that nearly hurt more. She finished packing, turning to go. He was in the same place in the living room, and she pulled the key off her ring, setting it on the coffee table.
"I don't know what you want. I know I want you. But if we can't talk about when I was away and what happened for both of us then this isn't gonna work. I'll see you around, Atwater."
Vanessa was proud that she didn't cry until she'd gotten into her car, driving the familiar streets to Hailey's. But once she was in her best friend's arms, she let herself cry for everything she'd lost by taking that stupid job.
Hailey Upton and Adam Ruzek have been friends for as long as they can remember. When Hailey changes schools to be with Adam in her junior year, she’s introduced to a new group of people who feel strangely like home.
pairings:
jay halstead x hailey upton
adam ruzek x kim burgess
kevin atwater x vanessa rojas
kelly severide x stella kidd
warnings (chapter specific): mention of domestic abuse, implication of alcoholism
masterlist | series masterlist
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Standing in the kitchen of the Ruzek's home early the next morning, Hailey was standing over a pot of oil as she cooked for the picnic she was set to go on with Jay in just a few hours. She had originally planned to make the greek dessert with her mother — after all, she had been the one to teach Hailey — but after the events of the previous afternoon and having the knowledge that her father was probably about to start drinking again once he got home, she had decided that going over to her best friend's house early was her best bet.
"Piss off, Adam," Hailey barked at her best friend, half joking as he tried to pinch one of the piping hot loukoumades. "You're like a seagull, I swear."
"They just look so good, Hailey! I can't help myself!"
"If your impatient ass would wait ten more minutes, they'll be ready with the nutella drizzle and everything."
"But that's so long!"
Hailey rolled her eyes, pulling the bowl away from the boy slightly to make a point. "Sometimes I forget that you possess the mental age of a toddler."
Adam only scrunched his face up cheekily before swiping yet another one of the round, golden donuts, ducking in an attempt to narrowly avoid Hailey's frustrated swat. Secretly, she didn't mind as much as she let on — after all, she had made the dessert enough times to know this would happen — though it wouldn't stop her from scolding the boy regardless.
It was earlier than Hailey would normally be up and out of bed on a Saturday morning , but with her plans being to bring loukoumades to the picnic she was going on later that morning, she knew she was going to have to make them fresh for them to taste their best. Adam wasn't one to be up any earlier than midday either; apparently the smell had been a great motivator as he fell into the chair across on the other side of the kitchen island. With it being only 8:30am, it was no surprise to either of the teenagers when the sound of Adam's father coming home from yet another night shift echoed through the otherwise (relatively) quiet home.
"Ooh!" Bob's voice could be heard from the front foyer as the his keys jingled against the door at being hung up. "Hailey, are you cooking?"
Hailey couldn't help but giggle slightly at the fact that he knew that it was her right away.
"Yeah, I'm making loukoumades!"
"She's making loukoumades and won't let me have any!"
"Excuse me!? I told you I was making extras for you, but Mr Impatient over here decided he couldn't wait a few minutes and was just going to start stealing them instead!"
"I did not steal them! It's only stealing if you see me do it!"
"First of all, that's not how that works and second of all? I fucking did see you!"
"No you didn't."
"Yes, I did!"
"Nah. I couldn't see you, so you couldn't see me. That's the rules."
"Remind me how you couldn't see me? I'm right in front of you!"
"I closed my eyes."
Hailey rolled her eyes in playful annoyance as Bob finally entered her view, the man baring a small smirk as he listened to the two teenagers bicker lightly.
The man shrugged off his Chicago Police Department jacket, draping it over the arm of the couch (something he would definitely be hearing about later from his wife) before making his way over to the kitchen island and standing beside his son.
"What's the special occasion, Hails?" Bob asked, gesturing towards the mini mountain of donuts she had made. "Not that you need one, but — still."
Before the girl even got the chance to respond, Adam's mouth had opened and spewed out a response almost instantaneously.
"Hailey's going on a date."
"I am not going on a date," the girl huffed, quietly flipping off Adam as she pulled her attention to the man who had originally posed the question.
"My friend Jay asked me if I would go with him on a picnic that he's only being dragged on because his brother wanted to go on a date with his girlfriend, and he didn't want to third wheel. Their mom would only let Will go if Jay went too, so he figured that if he asked me we could enjoy some nice food as well as work on our Lit assignment."
"In other words, it's a date." Adam yet again had to duck to avoid Hailey's backhand as he grinned mischievously.
"Shut up and call Kim or something, make more kissy faces and heart eyes at each other — I don't care."
The boy quickly pursed his lips shut as his face reddened, shooting Hailey a glare over at her. However, he didn't stay quiet for long; as soon as Hailey dumped out the last of the loukoumades that had finished frying into the bowl, the boy immediately reaching for one and subsequently earning himself a nice burn on two of his fingers. Dropping it back into the bowl, Hailey watched with a half-amused-half-concerned expression as she sighed deeply before grabbing a cup, filling it with ice from the fridge and wordlessly handing it to the boy who dipped his fingers into it.
"I don't want to say karma, but — it's a bitch, isn't it?"
Adam only flipped Hailey off with his non-burnt middle finger as the girl glanced up at Bob with a mischievous yet exasperated smirk, the man making his way around the kitchen island to be on the same side as Hailey. While Hailey readied the syrups, she watched the man's every movement, carefully examining his facial expression as she tried to quietly read him. He had his serious face on; Hailey wasn't sure she liked it too much.
"He give you or your mother any trouble this morning?" Bob asked the blonde haired girl gently, his eyes scanning Hailey's blue ones on the off chance that she was about to lie.
"I left before he got home."
Bob only nodded lightly; he had expected as much. "I made sure he was sober before he went home, Hailey. He could have driven had he had a car that wasn't in the impound lot currently. He'll get it back this afternoon, but for now — he can taxi his way around."
Hailey didn't say anything, instead opting to sigh lightly to herself as she glanced down at her feet. She knew it wasn't his fault, that he was only looking out for her, but she hated that her relatively good mood had been dampened by the mention of her pathetic excuse for a father. She missed the days when she could somehow separate the times she'd climb on his back while he pretended to be whatever she wanted him to be from the man that would terrorise the whole family to the point where Hailey would hide in her closet, sobbing. Now as she got older, all she could see was a manipulative monster.
"You need a ride, Hails?" Bob could see the drop in Hailey's mood, guilt bubbling up inside of him as he tried to rectify the situation. "I can take you to your friend's house if you need. Or you can take the car if you want."
"No thanks —" Hailey bought her eyes up to meet Bob's once more. "They're going to swing by here and pick me up on the way."
Bob nodded with a smile, glancing between her and Adam before gesturing towards the staircase around the corner as he bid goodnight to the two teenagers. Yes, the sun had barely come up, but working a double night shift often had the ability to tire out even the greatest insomniacs. Finishing off the last touches of her loukoumades before packing them into two separate containers — one to take with her and one for the Ruzek's (cough, Adam) to devour — Hailey headed around the other side of the kitchen island and took a seat beside her friend with a small smirk playing at her lips. She couldn't help but stifle a laugh at the fingers still dunked in a cup of ice, much to Adam's dismay to tried (and failed) to childishly kick her foot without slipping off of his own seat.
"You know, this morning has taught me a valuable lesson, Ruz."
Adam arched an eyebrow challengingly. "Is it that you're a coldhearted sadist?"
"No, but good job for using such big words!"
"I hate you."
"Fine, no loukoumades for you—"
"Wait, no! I take it back!"
"That's what I thought," Hailey smirked even more this time. "Anyway, what I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted — I've learned that if I want you up before midday, all I have to do is cook and you'll come running."
"And I learnt that all it takes to get you to cook my favourite food ever is to have you go on a date."
"It's not a date!"
"Is so!"
"Is not!"
"Uh huh!"
"Shut up before I tell Kim you like her."
In one swift movement, Adam reached into his cup of ice and pulled out a handful of the tiny ice cubes, dropping the cold blocks down the back of Hailey's shirt looking all too smug as the girl let out a disgruntled half-groan-half-squeal. Before anything else could be said, the sound of Hailey's phone buzzing indicated Jay's arrival as the girl slid off of her seat and flicked the back of Adam's head teasingly before calling out a goodbye and heading out the door.
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Hailey wasn't exactly sure where Jay's brother had taken them, but wherever it was, she didn't care. The view was gorgeous and Natalie, Will's girlfriend, had bought along an entire picnic blanket and an assortment of sandwiches which neither Hailey or Jay could say they were mad about.
"Oh my god, these are amazing!" Natalie grinned over at Hailey as she placed a golden greek donut into her mouth. "Did you make them?"
Hailey nodded bashfully. "Yeah, just this morning. Lucky there's any left — Adam was helping himself to his body weight in loukoumades."
Will and Jay laughed heartily, knowing exactly what Adam was like while Natalie only chuckled with a smile.
"What's the glaze you've got over it?"
"These ones are a pretty simple honey glaze —" Hailey gestured to the container on her left before moving to the one on her right. "And these one's are a nutella glaze. They're the only ones I know how to make. My mom knows how to make a bunch more — she’s like magic."
After the group had a bite to eat, it wasn't long before Will and Natalie left Hailey and Jay alone, the older couple giggling in a way that Hailey knew all too well as they headed down to the water's edge. Jay couldn't help but snort lightly to himself as his brother walked in the opposite direction; he seemed greatly amused by the whole situation.
"The fact he hasn't found a way to fuck this up yet is baffling, honestly," Jay started, piquing Hailey's interest. "He's a walking disaster, Hailey. I'm telling you."
"I'm sure he's not that bad. I mean, he seems like a nice guy." Hailey's defence landed upon deaf ears as Jay quickly unraveled her words.
"He's only got the best intensions, but — god — he's such an idiot." Jay sighed lightly, causing the blonde to chuckle as she reached for a sandwich.
On the few outings that Jay had taken her on, Hailey couldn't help but notice that Jay had impeccable taste in setting. Her quietly-chaotic nature paired well with his calm and secluded plans; she felt warm every time that she was near him. Though Adam was (and always would be) her best friend, she would be lying if she said she hadn't been enjoying her time with her literature partner.
"How do you find these places, Jay?" Hailey asked, one knee tucked comfortably into her chest as she glanced over at the dark haired boy. "They're almost — I don't know — ethereal? It feels like nobody can find us for miles, but not in the 'holy shit we're going to die' way. More like the 'this moment feels infinite' way."
Jay considered her words for a moment, his face screwed up in thought as he dissected each sound and syllable in a split second. For a second, Hailey had second guessed herself — had everything she had just said come out ineligibly?
"Sorry. Sometimes the words in my head don't translate to my mouth and everything comes out weird and —"
"No, it made sense." Jay held a finger up to shush Hailey, the boy still in thought. "It actually made perfect sense. But, answer me this, Miss Upton — why do places like this appeal to you so much? Is it the quiet, or the stillness, or. . .?"
To Hailey, the answer was simple.
"The escapism."
This piqued Jay's interest, the man tilting his head with curiosity. A small smile caused his lips to curl up simultaneously as he gestured for the girl to continue.
"There aren't a lot of things I can control. I can't control the people around me or what they do, and even though it's hard to accept sometimes, the only thing that makes it easier is escaping. Being somewhere where the world just — stops — for a minute or two . . . it tricks me into thinking I have more control than I actually do, and god knows I need that sometimes."
"I never took you to be the control freak type, you know," Jay joked lightheartedly. "Perfectionist, maybe. But not controlling."
Hailey sighed a little, her teeth sinking into her bottom lip. "Sometimes to keep your sanity you need to at least pretend the ground isn't crumbling around you."
Silence fell upon the two teenagers for a few seconds before Jay spoke up.
"For the record, if you ever need an escape in the form of a human being — I'm here."
"You know, I think I'd like that." Hailey smiled warmly at Jay, their eyes locked together. "I think I'd like that a lot."
By the time Will and Natalie came back, Hailey and Jay had their respective notebooks filled with little things about each other. After weeks of getting to know the brown haired boy, Hailey was finally ready to write her poem.
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a/n: i’m really sorry this isn’t very good but i’ve been working on it for ages and the formatting was being a bitch so aaaa. hope you enjoy anyway! :/