FUCK im late anyway also for file my beloved: alone bound ;) hate skin
I LOVE U i knew youd give me the good good
alone: How does your OC deal with loneliness? Have they ever been completely alone before? How do they act when there's no one around to see them?
oooh this is a good one.... SHAPEFILE grew up in a lab surrounded by scientists constantly observing him, and although he doesnt remember much about it, he definitely has an ingrained sense of feeling weird on his own. i think he probably finds being alone and undistracted very perturbing. if hes alone, hes probably doing GIS stuff and/or homework.
otherwise i feel like they fill their life with various odd characters to amuse them and keep them from feeling lonely. not that they'd admit that, and not that it would show based on how they treat people
really, when FILEs alone i feel like FILE just goes full autism mode. stim city. maybe those untapped traumas memories from FILEs childhood start to seep in... who knows
bound: Has your OC ever been imprisoned or captured? What happened? How did they get out? Did the experience leave any scars?
FILE was pretty much kept imprisoned for the first 13 years of his life, which, again, he does not remember but still has lingering emotional scars from. as for what happened, he has no way of knowing, but hes fairly certain it was bad. part of why he doesn't think too deeply about his issues and hates being alone with his thoughts is because of the weird triggers and fetishes he has that he can't place the origin of. its just NULL data. he does have scars, all over his body, but he was told they were all part of the process of creating him. frankenstein lookin ass.
they only got out by waking up age 13 (so they're told) with no memories, being told who they were (supposed to be?) and being assigned an adoptive family.
hate: What does your OC hate? Why? How do they act towards the object of their hatred?
the funnier and less twisted answer to this question is open source software. they fight constantly with Quin, the local naturalist dyke, who insists that Esri software (again, FILE believes they were literally created to shill this stuff) sucks and that proprietary software shouldnt exist. also, they hatefuck
as for the real answer, it's FILEs second thesis advisor (dont worry about what happened to the first one) Dr. Tan, who has taken an unfortunate liking to FILE, with whom FILE has a deeply questionable relationship FILE has very weird feelings about. FILE knows their dynamic is abusive but FILE feels like FILE brings it upon FILEself by being, on some level, into it.
when Tan's around in public, FILE gets very closed off and defensive, trying to put distance between them. in private, the facade fades quickly and FILE finds themself feeling painfully reliant on the affection and affirmation from the person they hate the most
skin: How comfortable is your OC in their skin? Do they grapple with anything that lives inside them—a beast, a curse, a failure, a monster? How do they face the smallest, weakest, most horrible version of themself? Are they able to acknowledge it at all?
ahhhh yes, the kicker to everything above. SHAPEFILE is so uncomfortable in their own skin it hurts. as has been the theme of these answers, they are in no way prepared to face the reality inside themself. what might that reality be? i think FILE's nightmare scenario would be to find out there was another path for him all along. that he doesnt need to be a machine to be a man, that he doesnt need to be a man to be a machine
thats part of why FILE hates Tan so much. tan acknowledges this potential, but also takes advantage of it. this all contributes to FILEs weird feelings about the already weird situation
accepting that they can be someone other than the person [ERROR: Data type 'person' not specified] ??? they were prescribed to be is the one thing they need the most to self-actualize, but SHAPEFILE is so far removed from the self. SHAPEFILE is just points, lines, and polygons. SHAPEFILE is just space.
but if he acknowledges it, he acknowledges that there's nothing special about him.
Geoffrey Isaiah Shapiro is just taking up space.