I’ve heard that you like angst in a recent post, so, well, I’ve got some thing angst for you, with a happy ending though of course. This is meant to tie into that “Makima Comforts You” request I made. What if Makima had a dream/nightmare about what would’ve happened had she never met Y/n? What if she saw the horrid things she had done, killing Denji’s found family, hurting innocent people, making the Angel Devil kill his village. And maybe to add more angst, what if Makima had witnessed herself killing Y/n, because in that turn of events, she didn’t even know him, he meant nothing to her, and the dream ended with that alternate ending version of Makima confronting herself, telling her that they are one in the same and that she could never change, that she doesn’t truly love Y/n and that she’s just using him for the love he gives her, that she’s gotten so good at pretending that she’s even fooling herself, and it’s going to end up like all other “relationships” she had, with her killing him when she got bored of him. Our Makima told her it’s not true, that she does love Y/n, and that she’d never hurt him, but then she wakes up. You can decide how she reacts, if she wakes up sobbing, or sulks, or pretends she’s alright. But of course Y/n knows somethings wrong and he confronts her about it and she breaks, telling him about the dream and that she’s afraid that she will hurt him eventually. But this time, it’s Y/n’s turn to comfort Makima.
Comforting makima after a nightmare
Pairing:makima x male reader
A/n:there are spoilers for the ending of csm 1 here (or at least how i remember it i am going based purely on memory cause i'm not rereading that trauma again so some stuff might be inaccurate) I guess just the way I write makima in general is kinda spoilery but there are mentions of canon deaths here so I just wanted to put a warning. Also I made the other makima's dialog red and yellow to differentiate
Thank you so much for this request I really loved writing it so I hope you like it too
When makima woke up, she was in a movie theater. She looked around and saw nothing but dozens of red seats around her all empty except for her own, she was about to react when she saw the screen light up, what she was on there left her completely terrified
It was her, or at least a version of herself, in every way it looked like her but makima could sense that there was something wrong about that image of her, her eyes looked darker, she knew that look, they were the eyes of the old her, something that became even more clear when she saw what her image on the screen did next
She forced aki to make a contract with the gun devil, transforming into basically a vessel for the devil and thus forcing denji to kill him
And just when he was at his most vulnerable and depressed makima invited him to her house only to kill power right in front of him, on his birthday nonetheless
Among the many other atrocities she committed like brainwashing all the other hybrids and slaughtering anyone and anything that came her way, there was one in particular that made makima want to start crying, your death.
That makima killed you, not only that, she disposed of you so effortlessly and emotionlessly it felt like she was doing a chore rather than killing a person, makima could never even imagine herself doing anything that came close to what had just happened on the screen and yet the her on there had just did it with no thoughts at all, that was the final confirmation that that wasn't her
As much as makima wanted to stop watching, she couldn't, she was stuck on that seat with no way to close her eyes or look away, she already knew this was a nightmare and one she couldn't wake up from no matter how much she wanted to
As suddenly as it started the "movie" ended and before makima could breathe a sigh of relief she heard a voice come from her right
She turned around and saw......her, or another her, she quickly recognized her as the makima from the movie, she was wearing the same black dress she wore during her wedding but there was something incredibly ominous about her and her eyes especially, something that was only accentuated by the red halo constantly floating above her head. makima wondered if this was how the people who met the old her felt
The other makima gasped in fake surprise before offering a sickeningly sweet smile
"Don't you recognize me? I'm the devil who represents the fear of conquest and control I'm you makima"
"What kind of devil are you? The nightmare one? What are you hoping to achieve by entering my dreams?"
The other makima blinked and looked genuinely surprised this time before erupting into laughter scaring even the true her
"I can't believe it. You're even more delusional than I thought. You've even begun to deny yourself"
She got up and went face to face with her counterpart, as she walked, makima noticed that the movie theater around them disappeared, and now they were surrounded by nothing but darkness
"I am you, no matter how much you try to deny it, you know it better than anyone else"
"......what do you want?"
"I just wanted to ask how the plan was going, you're really taking longer than you originally planned"
"And don't try to deny it again, you know that what you saw was all your plan, your thoughts exactly, you wanted all that to happen, all to take control of the chainsaw devil"
"You said well, wanted, that is no longer my intention"
She smiled again, makima started wondering if her smile really was as beautiful as you said it was because right now standing in front of her smiling self she wanted nothing more than to punch her in the face no matter what random Japanese citizen had to get hurt
"Are you saying you abandoned the plan?"
"....because I have no interest in anything like that anymore"
She pressed her arm against her chest as she thought of you
"The only thing I care about is y/n"
".....y/n?.....who is that?"
Hearing that caused makima to get even madder as she glared at her other self
"Shut up, you know exactly who he is, that's why you included his death specifically in that movie of yours right?"
"Ah right, well as far as I'm concerned"
She stopped smiling now as she gained a serious look
"He is just another dog who I have no interest in, if he stands in the way of the plan he needs to be elimina-"
"If you dare say anything like that about him again I'll kill you, I don't care what happens to me"
"How protective, I can see he means a lot to you, even if I can't understand why, that will make killing him all the much sweet-"
She was stopped by an air buller grazing her shoulder, leaving her shocked
"I warned you, didn't I?"
".....stay in your lane dog"
Now actually annoyed the other makima extended her fingers to create a chain that wrapped around makima's neck
Losing control of her body she obeyed and got on her knees. She tried to remove the chain but her attention moved to her other self looking at her from above
"I don't know why you were born, but you smell just like a human.....what happened?"
"No matter, the plan has to continue did you already forget our goal? The new world we wanted, we will create it no matter what has to happen"
".....I think I understand now"
"You're the control devil"
"I suppose I am too, but you....You're my devil side born in hell, the one that wants nothing more than to continue with her foolish plan"
".....and then what are you?"
"......I....am the human makima, the one that was born when y/n entered my life"
"....a human?........a devil could never become a human"
"No of course not, not biologically or physically, but.....if there's something I know is that unlike you, I have a heart, and that's what differentiate us"
Makima looked up at her other side and stared her down directly in the eyes
"You're the foolish one, you died the moment y/n accepted my confession, you're still clinging to me hoping to manipulate me into becoming you again, you really are the old me.....but now...I'll bury you"
She grabbed the chain wrapped around her neck, the one she had used to control and hurt so many people previously
"I'm done letting you control me too now"
Another shot rang out this time it hit the other makima directly in the heart and she fell down on the ground bleeding, makima was surprised to see technically herself being defeated so easily but she explained it as being a dream. She walked closer to her body on the ground stepping in her blood and looking down at her
"Now that I have someone's to live for, I won't let you ruin anything anymore, I won't let anyone hurt y/n......not even myself"
"........i see.....you are still as cruel as ever"
"Go ahead and live your fantasy for however long you want, you'll return back to normal before you even know it. No matter what you say to yourself, you're still a devil"
"You will never be a human, face it, you're me, and will always be the control devil"
At this point makima started getting even angrier and sweating
"Even now, you're using y/n without even realizing it. You wanted to be loved, so you changed yourself into what you thought someone could love, but no matter how much you try to change, you'll still always be a devil, you'll end up hurting y/n when this love stops feeling good and you'll return back to your plans"
".......what are you saying? You're the one saying these things, after all....we're the same you and i"
Makima attempted to strike the body on the ground before she woke up, panting and sweating. Looking around, she saw she was in her room, the one she shared with you, and the moment you came in your mind, she turned and saw you sleeping next to her
She looked at your sleeping form for a relatively long time and her heart sank even more, of course she didn't want to believe the words her devil self had just said but her brain couldn't help but do just that
She could never kill you, she loved you more than anything and anyone in the universe, mostly because she had never loved until you entered her life. It was true she changed because of you, but that wasn't just because she wanted to be loved, it was her way of making amends with everyone else, if she developed morals and started helping humanity for real then she could keep telling herself that she wasn't as cruel of a devil as she could have been, after all she hadn't fully put her plan into motion, even if she had killed and manipulated people she still didn't do in as big of a scale as she was planning so in the end....it was fine....right?
"......who am I kidding? I'm still such a cruel monster......and that's all I'll ever be"
Makima took a deep breath and hugged her knees under the blanket, she kept her head low so that any possible sniffles or tears wouldn't wake you up, she never wanted to bother you especially because only you caused her to feel this way usually, however it looks like she underestimated you
"Makima....is everything alright?"
She looked towards you once again but this time she saw you were awake and staring at her
"What happened? You look....makima have you been crying?"
"N-no please don't worry everything is alright"
You put your hand on her cheek and brushed it softly
"Makima, I can tell when something's going on, please tell me"
She struggled actually talking and froze for a bit, that left you even more worried so you gently held her hand with your other one
"Did you....have a nightmare?"
Hearing that you hugged her and started stroking her back for a while, your warmth and closeness calmed makima down enough for her to start speaking again and she explained everything about the nightmare, about the conversation with the other her and what she said about makima never being human and just using you. She swore to you that it wasn't true and that she truly loved you so much, but she wasn't sure if you'd believe her, and she couldn't have blamed you if you didn't
But you continued to hug her even more tightly and listen to everything she had to say, until she said something but particularly shocked you
"....y/n....if you ever think I'm turning back into my old self.....then please kill me"
"Do it early, before I get the chance to do any more harm or brainwsh you or anyone else, ask denji to eat me that way i'll stop existi-"
"Don't even joke about that"
"Do you seriously think I could just kill you like that.....after everything we went through"
"No, I'll never do that......because I know I'll never need to do that"
"Makima, you've loved me more than anyone has ever done before, all of the time we spent together, our connection meant something, and it can't just disappear like that"
This time she was the one to hold both of your hands
"Believe me y/n, I think that too, I love you so so so much and want nothing more than to spend the rest of my existence in peace with you.....but I'm still a dangerous devil, and if I start changing for the worst and reverting back to my old self.....I'd much rather die than endanger you or any other human"
"What I'm trying to say is.....this second chance I've been given....sometimes I think I don't deserve any of this mercy"
After a bit of time spent in more silence you hugged makima again and spoke with a soft but determined voice
"No you're wrong, you deserve all of this and you'll never become your old self again"
"........w-what? Y/n what are you saying?"
"I've been living with you for how many years now? I know you and more than that I love you, I love you so much, and I know that the woman I love could never do the things in your dream"
"Makima for me, you're a human, as much of a human as me or anyone else, and every human deserves another chance. I don't care about the powers that you have, how and where or when you were born, and what you biologically are. You are the human woman I love, and I will never stop loving you no matter what happens"
At this point tears started welling up in makima's eyes once again, this time way more than before, it was because of a weird mix of sadness but also overwhelming happiness and relief, you truly loved her just as much as she loved you, she already knew you considered her a human but hearing you say that after such a vivid nightmare that made her question her own self was exactly what she needed. so she hugged you back and started crying in your chest while muttering apologies and other loving words
"Thank you so much y/n.....i-i really do love you, thank you"
"It's nothing, I just said the truth, do you want to cuddle even closer now, I'll make sure you don't have any other nightmares"
"...yes of course, I'd love that"
And so she wrapped her arms around you and you begun to cuddle once again, makima this time having beautiful dreams of you