The laboratory has a strange feeling to it. The extent to which sterilisation is enforced is crazy compared to the labs I’ve worked in before, and they don’t even disclose anything to the employees. Yet, no one questions…it’s simply blind faith. I’m following instructions and making solutions for calculations that I don’t even know what I’m solving for. The kids seem so out of place; they don’t act like other children, they have no self-expression, their vocabulary is small, and they look like they’re being trained as soldiers. I’m not sure, I don’t have access to them.
Day 2:
So, today Dr Brenner had a chat with me. I was thinking it had to do with what I spent most of my life studying, but no, he wants me to focus on medical assistance. We have so many doctors here, and he chose me. I’m sure it’s because I’m a woman, but wtv. He said to meet him near the playroom at 8 pm sharp. I guess I have to brush up on my medic aid.
Day 61:
He tortured someone.
He hurt one of the handymen.
His screams were so loud.
Dr Brenner interrogated him, but I couldn’t hear anything. I was called in shortly after and was handed Band-Aids and such. The doctor didn’t explain anything, but he looked at me, and I knew what I had to do.
He looked so innocent, I can not think of anything that could lead to a man being tortured, especially by his employer. I managed to clean his wounds and check his vitals before the Doctor returned and signalled me to leave. I honestly don’t know what to do. Was this a demonstration of what would happen if I strayed out of line?
Day 62:
Today, I was instructed to work with the cute little boys and girls by Dr Brenner. He wanted me to monitor their behaviour and make ways to encourage their progress. A background in psychology helped a lot. I noticed a familiar limping man in there. He didn’t say much, but I didn’t miss the sense of being watched. We made eye contact so often that I was amazed by how blue a person's eye colour could be.
“Who the hell wrote this book?”
“Ok, you’ve spent the last 20 minutes reading that dumb book while everyone here has been doing actual research. Like you could come help us, Robin.” The long-haired boy yells at the short-haired woman, and the younger children snicker to themselves amongst books as they watch the two older ones quarrelling.
“Steve, this diary contains so much information about this guy who was tortured at the lab. Eleven," Robin turns to look at the girl dressed in a wet suit. “Do you know anything about some guy who Dr Brenner tortured? Someone who worked for him, maybe?” “Yes, it’s Henry.”
The group sitting around boxes filled with dusty books and files look at each other in shock. For the past few hours, they’ve been digging around in the basement of Hawkins' laboratory with a goal of finding more about Vecna. Most of the files were redacted or missing, or did not have any information. The large books had words and math that would send Steve into a coma without the help of Vecna. So far, there was nothing they could find until Robin noticed a small out of place shoebox under the bookshelves. The shoebox was white with faded but colourful designs, a regular shoebox that could’ve been found in the mall Steve and her seen multiple times in their old jobs. She opened the box, pulling out a brown journal. She yelped an “OW” from a sudden sting to the tips of her fingers. She carefully reaches back in and finds a small metal piece that has slipped out of the book and back into the shoebox. The culprit was a knife, or a dagger, Robin couldn’t decide. But it was the size of a tiny pendant, easy enough to slip under a shirt but oddly sharp enough to cut it as well. She laid the necklace back in the box, focusing her attention on the journal itself. Robin’s fingers caressed the edges of the front and back flaps, small black ridges and dents covered its surface. The beige pages crinkled under her touch, opening the book, the smell of vintage cook books filled her nose. Skimming through it looked like a regular diary, maybe a scientist's personal findings, the same ones as the rest. Robin gazed back at the shoebox, it was out of place compared to the other boxes. It was tucked away, hidden while the others were organised in a perfect manner. What other journal was in a branded shoebox? The chair screeches against the floor as she pulls it out. Brushing away the dust as she sits down to open the wrinkly journal.
“Hey! I found it first!” The boy with the brown trench coat steals the leather book out of her hands as he ignores the annoyed look on Robin's face. Files and papers scattered all over the tables are pushed onto the ground. Dustin's hand reaches for a large, yellow-lit lamp and positions it above the book as he places it on the table.
To Him and I
The group reads the engraving without any idea of who this “I” is.
“How far have you read into the book?” A tall, slender, raven-haired boy asks Robin.
“Uhh, just a couple of entries really, but there isn’t much information. She brings up “
“She?” Eleven asks, interrupting Robin. “Who is this “she?”.
“Her name is not even mentioned; she mentioned she was a woman, and that’s really how far I’ve gotten. I think she could’ve had a personal tie to Vecna. It seems like psycho Brenner appointed her as his personal nurse.”
All eyes were on Eleven as she reached for the book, opening the pages to the first few pages. She skims the paper and follows the black cursive writing. The rest of the group looked at each other, wondering if she had any clue who “I” was.
“I thought she was dead.” She sighs in defeat. “I think it’s just an old journal; I doubt it has much.” Her fingers grab the rough edges to close it, but a brown hand slips in between the pages.
“I’m not gonna give up so easily. What are the chances out of all of these books that we manage to find something actually related to him?”
“This is so not worth our time, guys; it was probably written before Lucas was even born.” Steve groans at the idea of finding a reliable source. Finding one was difficult enough, but his time reading through the books was getting to his throbbing brain. “Is there at least a journal entry date?” He hopelessly asks.
Lucas flips to the end of the book, where the cursive comes to an abrupt stop. His eyes land on the top right corner, then they dart around the room. “This doesn’t make sense.” The dark-haired boy grabs the book only to have the same shocked face as the other boy.
Eleven catches his eyes and asks, “What is it, Mike?”
“It’s…the last entry…it was 2 years ago”
The group glanced at each other. Whoever wrote this book was alive. They had crucial information for the past couple of years and were the biggest connection to Vecna so far.
“She died, Mike. No one escaped that day other than me and Papa,. Henry would not show mercy to anyone else. It has to be a mistake. I saw her with Seven, on the ground,” she grimaced at the image of their twisted bodies. A thick silence filled the air, they didn’t know what to do with such information if Eleven was so sure about the writers death. They had one lead, one chance, and it’s already gone.
“We still need to try.” All the heads looked at the boy in the trench coat.
Eleven spoke up. “Dustin, it’s not worth it. We can find-“
“What else are we gonna find, huh?” His quiet demeanour changes as his eyes fill with anger. “We’ve searched for hours on end and still come up with nothing. I don’t know what else we can go on, or what else we can do. I just want it to be over with, I want to be able to breathe without wondering if my friends are gonna die.” He looks up at his friends. “I can’t do it again.”
“Hey,” Dustin’s teary eyes meet Steve’s, “we’re gonna lead with this, kay?” He reassures the curly-haired boy with a gentle smile, receiving one back.
“I don’t remember much. She was one of the nice doctors, but she spent time with Henry a lot. She only worked there for a bit, but I would see them together in the rooms. Alone at times.”
“Do you remember her name by chance?” Eleven looks up to a questioning Mike.
“(L/N),” she answers, “it was (L/N). I’m sure of it.”
i think my problem with the idea of will's arc ending with accepting himself and the fact that mike won't love him back is that it falls into this weirdly christian idea i hear all the time that gay people should accept who they are and that they're sinners but should know better than to act on it or talk about it like it's normal and ok. and it's a mindset that the show, advertently or not, falls into often. we still haven't heard any character say the word gay or lesbian, just point at it through thinly veiled euphemisms like 'different' and 'this part of me', and even though we've literally had a lesbian kiss on screen i think the language the show uses around queerness needs to be talked about. the only explicitly queer terminology that the show has used is joyce saying kids used to bully will for being a fag, and even then she half mouths/whispers it and then doesn't confirm or deny anything when hopper asks whether or not it's true. it's all well and good to say that will's arc is that he needs to accept himself but it means absolutely nothing if he can't even call himself gay out loud, and even less so if the lesson he learns is that he needs to back off on his straight best friend and not make it weird. if the show tells us that will accepts himself and is accepted by the people around him but then shows us that he can't explicitly and tangibly interact with his queerness, the integrity of his character arc is compromised. worse than that, you end up with some really troubling implications about the spheres in which queerness is allowed to operate, dangerous especially for how mainstream the show is.
he broke your heart one stormy sunday night and you hated him as you watched him leave with tears in both of your eyes.
granted, he did break your heart for your own good, to save you from the dangers of being with him. but you didn't care, not when he was your universe, your world. you would gladly take a bullet for him.
just as he would take a bullet for you.
minho knew leaving would break you, just as much as it would break him, but he needed to do it. life as an idol was already dangerous enough with all the death threats and saesangs, but the moment 'fans' caught even the slightest whiff of you they would hunt you down and hurt you, and minho simply couldn't let that happen. he knew you wouldn't care about all the danger as long as you were with him, but he did. minho would never forgive himself if something happened to you all because he had given in to his innermost wants and kept you by his side.
so he left.
november 8th, 2019, 8.46 pm.
"i want to break up." he said, one sunday night. the rain was pouring outside, flashes of thunder and lightning ringing through the sky occasionally. in the quiet and comfort of your shared apartment, with the dim glow of lamps illuminating your features, in that moment, for a split second, minho wanted to stay. he wanted to pretend everything was alright, to have you stay by his side and be happy together, but he knew he shouldn't. the two of you were eating dinner, sitting at the small round dining table in your kitchen tucking into your homemade kimchi stew. god, he would miss your kimchi stew, he thought miserably.
"what?" your world felt like it had stopped, your hand frozen in place as you slowly tilted your head to look at your boyfriend sitting across from you.
"i... want to break up." he repeated robotically.
"minho, where is this coming from? did i do something wrong? please... just talk to me," you begged, panic starting to flood your mind as tears threatened to spill over. you couldn't believe what he had just said. the both of you had been perfectly fine before, the both of you were happy, why was he doing this? were you not good enough for him? did he fall in love with someone else? the thought alone made you weak.
"i just... it's for the best. i'm putting you in danger every day, fans will hurt you if they find out i'm with you. i can't let that happen."
"i don't care if they try to hurt me, minho. as long as i'm with you, it’s- " you reached for his hand, and could feel your heart finally sinking to the bottom as you saw his face, screwed into an expression of hurt and resignation as he shook his head.
"just... don't forget me in the future, okay?" before you could say anything, minho was already out of his seat, grabbing his coat and his phone, already reaching for the front door.
"wait! minho-" you jumped out of your seat in alarm and desperation, clinging to his arm as he looked back at you with a pained expression.
"please- we can work this out, just don't leave me," you pleaded, tears already cascading down your face. you must've looked a pathetic mess in that moment, sniffling and sobbing, yet minho still thought you were the most beautiful person to ever exist as he memorised your face for one last time.
finally, minho turned around, cupping your face in his hands. your hands reached up to hold his, as he memorised your every detail for the last time. minho's lips found their way to your forehead, then the corner of your eyes, then your lips as he kissed you tenderly for the last time as you sobbed in his arms.
"i'm sorry." he whispered, before pushing you back as you cried out and stumbled backwards, opening the door, walking out of the apartment and out of your life.
december 25th, 2019, 11.28 pm.
your diary.
i still think of you, you know. i still see your face in the windows of that cafe shop we used to go to whenever i pass by. i know you're not in there, and i'm hallucinating. i can't go in there anymore, not without thinking of you. i can't even watch the television anymore without having to see your face. listened to your new comeback. that song was about me, wasn't it?
it's christmas now. i adopted some presents for you. you would love them, the three cats. i named them soongie, doongie, and dori. quite fitting, they're playful like you. they'll never meet their father. i still wore your hoodie, the green one i always wore every christmas. you used to wear my red hoodie, but i guess you won't be here to wear it anymore. it still smells like you.
i still wonder why you left. was such a pathetic excuse as me potentially being hurt the only reason why you would leave me? you knew i didn't care if i was hurt, so long as i was with you. you still left. i hate you for that, but deep down i could never hate you. i still love you.
january 7th, 2020, 2.35 pm.
you strolled down the busy streets of seoul, a long oversized fluffy coat resting on your shoulders and your nose pink from the cold. a sigh of relief escaped your lips when you finally stepped foot into the cozy ambience of a random cafe alongside the road, the warm air blowing gently at you helping to relieve the coldness settling into your bones. ordering a latte and a small cake which were promptly delivered to your table, you settled down to scroll through the news.
new technology developed, scientists say new machinery can effectively target and erase memories of specific people and objects. is now being offered at multiple mental health clinics nationwide at a low cost, guaranteed 90% success rate. for sign-ups and further information, please contact...
you raised your eyebrows at the news, marvelling slightly at how advanced technology seemed to be developing at this rate. thinking nothing of it, you simply continued scrolling.
january 7th, 2020, 12.02 pm.
you sighed as you flopped onto your bed, tired from a day of work and countless emails sent. feeling a warm, soft head poke it's way under your arm, you smiled softly, hand reaching out to scratch doongie's head as he meowed in content. smiling softly, you felt two large lumps jump onto your bed and settle on you, soongie choosing to settle on your feet and dori choosing to burrow his way under you arm as you giggled.
"soongie, you're so heavy," you laughing light-heartedly as your oldest cat let out a 'meow' of indignation at your words.
minho would love the cats so much...
your smile drooped, feeling that warm familiar sensation pricking at your eyes again.
god, how stupid. it had been two months already and you were still hung up on him. everywhere you went, you saw his face, on advertisments at the bus stop, billboards in the shopping districts, to even advertisments on youtube, and every single time your old memories with minho would surface and you would miss him again.
memories...
oh. the news of the memory erasure experiment.
would it hurt to try? you tried imagining forgetting minho. for him to just be another face on the billboard, a random k-pop idol to you. to forget you had ever even loved him and forget that he ever loved you. the pain would be gone. your heart would no longer ache each day, you would no longer think of him and he would no longer cloud your mind.
picking up your phone, your finger hovered above the 'call' button.
"hello? this is the seoul medical psychiatry clinic speaking. how may i help you?"
"i..." you paused, gnawing at your bottom lip.
"i would like to make an appointment."
january 19th, 2020, 1.28 pm.
"welcome! do you have a booked appointment?" the receptionist greeted cheerfully as you stepped into the reception and seating area of the clinic, a large box full of items in your hands. the hallways were filled with posters and quotes, the beanbags and seats painted in warm and soothing colours.
"yes, doctor kim at 1.35pm." you answered, watching as the receptionist typed a few words into her computer.
"ah yes, under the name yoon y/n, right?" she clicked her tongue, "for... memory erasure?" she glanced at you with a look full of sympathy, as if you were some lost wounded puppy.
"yes." you confirmed, lips pursing together slightly as you stared down at the box.
"good, and you've got your box of items already. do double check to make sure they are linked to that specific person only, we wouldn't want any erasure of other memories woth different people."
you swallowed the lump in your throat.
"yeah, i have."
"great, we'll be calling for you later, the doctor will run you through the procedure and then the operation will commence. take a seat first," she gestured to the seating area. not long after, you heard your name.
"yoon y/n?"
you hurriedly stood up, making your way towards the nurse and following her into the operation room. the operation room was white and cold, lacking any warmth and colour, filled with odd looking machinery and lab coats and tools. you were sat down on a chair, and your box of items given to the nurse who began taking them out one by one while another nurse attached a few wires to your skin to a machine on the right which measured your heart rate, a steady thump-thump-thump. the first nurse began to place your items in a row, scanning each one under a machine.
beep.
minho's green hoodie.
beep.
the snow globe the both of you had bought together at a winter festival.
beep.
polariods of you and him.
beep.
a cat plushie you had gifted him in celebration of his lastest comeback before he had left.
beep.
matching mugs the two of you had bought.
minho. everything, everywhere, everyone reminded you of minho. it felt like you were drowning, consumed by him.
"alright, i'll be placing the device on your head. the device will take you through individual memories of the person, but you will have to re-experience certain bigger core memories again as those take a longer time to process. if at any point should you feel distressed or want to stop, please press the red button beside you, and should you want to restore your memories we will reload them back into your brain. however, if you choose not to restore the memories, we will automatically delete them after 30 days." the doctor explained, showing you a strange contraption with two pulse points connecting to either side of your temple.
beside you, the heart rate measured by the machine started beeping faster.
you nodded.
the cold, tingly terminals of the device connected with either side of your temples, the unfamiliar feeling odd and alienating.
then all turned black.
"min! look, they have matching mugs! we should get them," you pointed excitedly to two mugs at a stall in a summer fair you and minho had just happened to pass by. you watched as your old self pointed to the mugs happily, "the world's best boyfriend" and "the world's best girlfriend" written on each mug respectively. "that's so cheesy," minho said, a grin on his face as he pulled you close to him by your waist. well, the old minho in your memories. it felt like a punch in the gut yet the cure to your pain as you stared at his face again in your re-lived memory, his oh-so-familar grin plastered on his stupidly handsome face. "yeah, but it's cute!" you exclaimed, turning to face minho. "pleaseeee," you begged, lips downturned in a pout and your eyes shining hopefully as you tugged on his arm. "fine," minho groans, eventually giving in into your request, feigning annoyace by rolling his eyes yet still smiling at your delighted expression.
god, you missed him so much.
the memory shifted, warping into another blurry picture.
this time, it was another memory that faded in, a memory of you and him sitting in the living room unwrapping your christmas presents. minho tore open his box eagerly, laughing as he held up a green hoodie from his favorite brand gifted to him by you, coupled with some other things like perfume and a brand new wallet. "oops... might've gifted you an accidental matching hoodie by accident," he smiled sheepishly, as you opened your present, some jewelry with . "a red hoodie! now we can match," you snickered, pulling the soft hoodie over your head and slipping it on. "hey, we look like the christmas colours!" you laughed, pouncing on him and tackling him down to make him wear his one as he whined in protest. eventually you did managed to get him to put it on and pose for some pictures, albeit him being disgruntled but still giving in to you anyways.
a tear trickled down your face, landing on your lap as your hands on the chair tightened, gripping the armrests so hard your knuckles started turning white.
the memory started to fade away.
"min! the new comeback was so good, i watched the music video just now," you exclaimed, bounding up to him the moment he opened the front door to your shared apartment. "thanks baby," he smiled, leaning in for a quick peck but suddenly finding a soft plushie being thrust into his hands. it was a plush of a brown and white striped cat, soft to the touch and extremely squishable. "what's this for?" he raised eyebrow, cocking his head in confusion as he stared at you. "it's to celebrate your comeback, I figured i'd give you something to cuddle when i'm not around you," you smiled, "i named the cat mr sprinkles." "who names a plush toy mr sprinkles?" minho laughs, watching as you huff at him about how the name was cute and he was being mean. "thank you though, i appreciate it," he kissed you softly, smiling at the small act of love.
no, stop-
you started to whimper and thrash around.
fade to black again.
"min, look," minho turned to you as you were admiring the ornaments at a booth, the both of you coming across a christmas market and deciding to explore it. "it's a snow globe of us," you pointed out to a small snow globe, with a man and women as figurines in the center of the snow globe and fake snow swirling in the water around them. "it does look like us, doesn't it?" he hummed, pressing a soft kiss into your hair as you subconsciously leaned into him. "we should get it," he suggested, smiling at how your eyes lit up and how you pressed a kiss to his cheek. the two of you purchased the item, and then bought some hot chocolate to sip on to relieve the cold setting into your bones. "jagi-ah," minho called, prompting you to look up at him before gasping in surprise. the first snow of the season. "you know, they say the person you witness the first snow with will be with you for a long, long time." minho grinned, leaning down to kiss you tenderly before intertwining your hands.
you didn't want to forget him, you realized, as you gasped for air, heartbeat skyrocketing as you tried to open your mouth to scream. no, you would never want to forget minho. you would rather cling onto those memories and deal with the pain forever than never having remembered him.
the memory faded.
you gasped in surprise as you ripped open the box, holding up a brand-new, shiny polariod camera wrapped in a gift box, its paper shreds used to cushion the camera hapazardly strewn about the floor. minho watched you with a small smile on his face, eyes sparkling as he happily obliged to any pose you wanted to do with him, groaning half-heartedly but still laughing at the silly faces you made.
the memory started to fade again.
"STOP!" your finger found the red button, desperately pressing it in an attempt to get the machine to start working. all of a sudden, you were jolted back into your consciousness in the middle of the white sterile room again, heaving and gasping for air as you tried to adjust back to the surroundings.
"are you okay? do you need to stop the operation?" the nurse asked, a concerned look on her face. beside you, the machine was beeping, a erratic rhythm.
beep. beep. beep. beep.
your hand reached up to fiddle with your necklace, looking left and right. you swallowed, a lump in your throat.
"yes."
----------
you stumbled out the clinic, hands clutching onto the box of items tightly as your eyes adjusted to the bright light of the sun.
hands shaking, you pulled out your phone.
'my love,' the contact at the top of the screen read. you hadn't called him in months, ever since he had broken up with you. you has tried for a few weeks, but day after day of missed calls was heartbreaking.
you pressed the button.
one ring.
two rings.
three rings.
four rings...
"hello?"
a voice you hadn't heard for months. a voice you had only been hearing in your dreams.
"minho-" a strangled sob left your lips.
"please." you could only force out a choked plea, tears falling rapidly, stumbling onto a nearby bench. people started at you as they walked by, a woman breaking down in a random street in seoul oddly disconcerting.
"where are you? i'll come get you." the moment you heard the concern laced in his voice, your eyes brimmed with more unshed tears, stifling a sob that threatened to escape. in the background, you could hear the sound of things being knocked over, presumably minho rushing to get to you.
you told him your location in between shaky breaths, occasional hiccups interrupting your sentence.
"just wait for me, ok? don't move anywhere," minho firmly instructed, voice soft and calming.
a few minutes passed, and he was nowhere to be found.
he would hate you for this, you realized. you didn't deserve him. he tried so hard to keep you safe, and how did you repay him? by almost erasing all memories of him. the thought of it just broke your heart even more, for if he knew what you had tried to do he would never want to have anything to do with you again.
"y/n!" you heard a voice yell, whipping around only to see minho running to you at full speed. you had never been more glad to see him, your knees instantly buckling as you collapsed into his arms, crying into the crook of his neck as you clutched onto him like a lifeline.
you didn't think you would ever get used to this feeling, you thought. his touch, warmth, his gentle strokes of your hair and whispered sweet nothings were like music to your ears, his hand coming up to rest on your back and his other coming up to gently stroke your hair as he swayed you back and forth. he had clearly just ran from dance practice, you realized, slightly sweaty and panting ever so slightly.
"what's wrong, jagi?" he murmured, soft brown eyes searching your own red and teary ones.
"i- i didn't want to remember you because it was too painful, and then i tried to erase my memories of you, but i realized i didn't want to and i really, really, really fucking miss you and it hurts-" your rambling was cut off by a hiccup, lips quivering as you stared back into his eyes.
here comes the part where he realizes your a disgusting bitch and hates you forever, you thought miserably.
"shh, it's ok," minho pulled you closer, engulfing you in his warmth as his hand rose up to cup your cheek.
what?
he was supposed to hate you, not do... this. you literally tried to erase all memories of him, he should be angry and offended, so why...?
nonetheless, you would take what you could get in what you assumed to be your last moments with him, so instead you leaned into his touch, memorising his every detail again. his soft brown eyes framed with delicate lashes, sharp nose and jawline, the pink rosy tint to his cheeks as the winter wind whipped around you.
"i'm sorry," you begged, "just don't hate me."
"i never did, silly." minho laughed softly, a wistful smile gracing his lips.
"but you left me." you said, confused.
"i left you because i loved you. it was just for your own safety, i didn't care about anything else," minho explained, brows furrowing slightly.
oh.
minho stumbled backwards as you crashed into him with a force, nearly knocking him over as you crashed your lips onto his, hands threading through his soft silky hair and teeth knocking against his. it was a heated, messy kiss, teeth clashing and tears streaming down your face, yet minho didn't seem to mind as he deepened the kiss with a fervour, all seeming to pour out of him, pain and regret, relief and want. it is only when you seperate with a gasping breath of air that you finally see his swollen, reddened lips.
“i’ll figure something out, i’ll talk to the company, make a statement or something- i won’t let anyone get to you, i promise,” he rambled, a giddy smile on his face. right now, minho could care less about the repercussions, even if he had to move mountains just to be by your side and keep you safe at the same time.
you giggled, an infectious laugh bubbling out of you. the both of you, crying in the middle of a street, hands intertwined and both a mess, yet you had never been happier with the person you truly loved.
“we'll be alright now.” you whispered. it wasn’t just a statement but a promise, one to keep forever.
december 25th, 2020, 1.43 pm.
“min! come look!” you squealed in delight, eyes lighting up when you were finally done. minho glanced over, and sure enough, you were up to mischief again, the three cats dressed in ugly christmas sweaters with cartoonish designs on them and matching hats on their heads. doongie let out a ‘meow’ of indignation, protesting as minho roared with laughter to scoop him and his fellow cats up. laughter bubbling out of your lips, you quickly grabbed your phone to take a picture of minho and the three cats, his face lighting up in amusement as he watched them try to squirm out of his grasp.
“i love you, you know that?” minho says that night, the two of you cuddled up on the couch with the cats, watching your favourite seasonal christmas movies together and snacking on popcorn.
“i don’t say it enough, partly because i’m not good at expressing myself, but i love you. your smile and personality and everything. just thought you should know.” the tips of his ears are red as he mumbles, scratching the back of his neck sheepishly.
you smile, a red tint blossoming across your cheeks as you lean in to kiss him softly.
“i love you too min.”
how did you ever get so lucky? you think, leaning in to rest your head on minho’s shoulder as you resumed watching the movie, one hand absentmindedly scratching dori’s head as he purrs in contentment. here, in the dim light of the cozy apartment with minho, love heavy in the air around you two and christmas lights twinkling merrily, you think you have everything you have ever wanted in life.
after all, it didn't really matter where you were, as long as minho was by your side.
nearly every steddie fanfic I've read (which has only been 3 so far, but still) Steve is almost always freaking out about being gay and Robin has to be the one to tell him he's bisexual and I find that so funny
A shitty boyfriend to el and a bad and homophobic friend to will that's great that's wonderful
When the epilogue comes out I could totally see Mike being like hey we should stop being friends and shit so I can grieve El and then El will appear again and they'll have six little nuggets and move to Iceland with three waterfalls
And will gets a random epilogue boyfriend or some shit that doesn't understand what he went through or anything
I understand why mikes the duffers self insert because there a bunch of asshole cowards that are horrible and homophobic
