#timber

[plagueislost]

tim get your head in the FUCKING game

[the-jason-todd-impreganator]

Bernard, trying to make a shopping list for the holidays, pausing: . . . Tim, how old is Damian?

Tim: Uh... I think like, nine? Wait... Maybe ten? Let me call Dick.

Dick, on the phone, toothbrush in his mouth still: Thirteen? Probably? Wait... When did he move to Gotham?

Tim: Uh... Two years ago, I think?

Dick: Hm... I'm adding Jason, one sec.

Jason, shooting people: What the HELL do you two want?!

Tim: How old is Damian??

Jason: Fuck if I know! Isn't he like, eight?!

Tim: I thought he was about that age?

Bernard, in the background: He went on a date last week.

Tim: Yeah. A playdate. Right?

Jason: Fuck this. Add Babs, she keeps track of this shit!

Barbara: I'm trying to hack the Pentagon! What do you three want!?

Dick: How old is Damian?!

Barbara: . . . Twelve?

Cass, in the background: Isn't he thirteen?

Stephanie, also in the background: No, Babs is right, twelve.

Tim: That doesn't sound right.

Jason: I'm telling you, he's eight!

Dick: Thirteen is the most realistic!

Bernard, sighing, pulling out his phone and texting Damian:

Bernard: He's fifteen.

Dick:

Jason:

Tim:

Babs:

Cass:

Steph:

Tim: Now THAT'S incorrect!

Muffled agreement...

[akaanmo]

sometimes you have to battle art block with a good ol kiss

[nayomichy]

MY SHAYLAAAAAAAS

[grakkie]

Down with the Bernard slander, I think he’s under-utilised BUT he has so much potential!!

[thcyn]

now that Tim has more free time :D

(continuation 1 / 2 )

[belladonna-nyx]

Did we all collectively agree that Tim chooses to have a public feud with Red Robin as a way to cover his identity?

___

Reporter, pushing a microphone on RR: What are your thoughts on Tim Wayne's recent kidnapping?

Red Robin, deadpan: He's an asshole cosplaying a feral racoon and whiny bitch.

-Later that day-

Tim, watching the news: Well fuck you too *flips off the TV*

Batfam: *concerned*

___

Bernard, who's publicly in a relationship with Timothy Drake-Wayne, was caught kissing RR on a rooftop. Kon-El, who the world thinks definitely has a thing with RR, was seen carrying Tim back to a penthouse at night.

This leads Gotham city to believe that Tim and RR stole eachother's boyfriend. Thus fuelling another war between RR and Tim on twitter.

It didn't help when a picture of Bernard and Superboy having a date was posted online.

___

Tim: *requested and funded a Red Robin joint to be built in Gotham city *

A video of RR staring at the building offended and distained from across the street went viral.