I’m 22 years old and I’m finally planning on going back to school this August.
I saw a post somewhere on Tumblr awhile back that something along the lines of “overachieving kids from the early 2000s are now all depressed and illiterate” and honestly, I’ve never seen something more accurate.
I was a 4.0 student in high school, captain of the track & cross country teams, first chair alto saxophone, and maintaining a decent social life. I was super successful, defining success is a whole separate problem of mine, but I was also a Mess(TM).
I had earned a full scholarship to any state university of my choice. Which is definitely something to be proud of, but at the time I was just... not impressed. I had this whole dream (I guess) of graduating high school, going straight to college, getting my bachelor’s, and eventually getting my doctorate in psychology.
Obviously, that didn’t happen.
I ended up going to the University of Kentucky immediately out of high school, attempting suicide shortly after starting, (I think I was literally there for like three (3) weeks.), dropped out that semester, was in the hospital and intensive therapy for a few months while living back at home with my mom and brother, starting school the following semester at Morehead State, fucking around and changing my major to art, I honestly don’t remember what happened that summer, the following semester I moved on campus and ended up dropping out halfway through that semester, then finally moved to Florida. Alone. At age nineteen (19).
Of course, I wasn’t totally alone, my boyfriend was living in Florida, (which he has a similar story but that’s not mine to share)
After moving to Florida, I’ve been working retail for the past three (3) years. (I hate customer service so goddamn much) While I was/am just working, my boyfriend has been working towards his bachelor’s.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m extremely proud of him. I’m just so tired. I feel like I’ve been doing this shit for so long, while all of my friends have been moving forward in their lives.
Most of my friends just graduated. Literally all of them are either still in school or just graduated this past May.
It just doesn’t feel fair. While I’m dealing with customers calling me babe or literally spitting on me or trying not to fight my racist coworker(s), all of my closest friends are studying things they’re passionate about.
Anyway, enough of me complaining about unfortunate circumstances.
I’m planning on quitting my job in August and f i n a l l y taking classes again. I don’t know what I’m going to be doing in the long run, I just know I’m ready to start.
I’m going to be taking chem, calc, sociology, and some other elective.
So yeah, here’s where I’m going to be saving all of my studyinspo and probably my ramblings.
Also, this is my side blog, my main is @svenskish
