#text joke

[prettyoldman]

A-Qing: Daozhang loves me more

Song Lan: He loves us equally, A-Qing

Xue Yang: I could stab you both and see who he helps first

Song Lan:

A-Qing: Oka-

Song Lan: I FEEL LIKE THERE ARE STEPS WE COULD TAKE BEFORE THAT

[sometimesstuck]

“College isn’t hard if you take the time to study”

[blus-witchy-blog]

A bunch of artist like to draw jackieboy-man with a hoodie (i’m guessing cause of into the spiderverse), so it made me think of this:

jack or other ego: jackie, why do you have your hood up when your costume’s hood already is?

jackie: So i can hide my identity twice as good.

i see no flaws in his logic.

[capngorgeous]

I'm honestly proud of this.

[uuuuugay]

My friend: what’s your favorite song?

Me: Asdfkl;

My friend: wtf

My friend: and how did you pronounce that out loud

[webby-is-a-wabbit]

them: you can't substitute symbols for actual letters

me: fuck th@

[bwolfels]

Me: *in cool voice* I guess you could say I'm kinda badass *Cuts to me skateboarding away from death with no helmet, flipping him off only to freeze and have a panic attack when I see a cockroach*

[subversive-romance]

A few years ago I was working as a producer on a Keith Richards biopic. I was really excited about the project, but there was difficulty finding a good casting director. After exhausting every lead possible I turned to an old colleague for advice. "You should hire Jesus". he said. Confused, I asked him why. "Well, it's right there in the Bible. Let he who hath not sinned cast the first Stone."