Little tiny thing that’s not much but eeeeeeh why not?
~
Sitting before the fires, Cullen watched them lick at the wood. The mages had already stoked them high, the heat reaching him and making sweat bead on his skin. The clan was gathering and the tension that had been building seemed to be absent as they came together. For that he was at least thankful. He’d seen the strain as he’d walked the hold, noticing exactly where the tension seemed to be the greatest. But he’d relied mostly on the hunters and Hawke for information on what was happening since his decision. He hadn’t wanted to hide but if he’d wanted to dance he’d needed to rest.
And, by the gods, he wanted to dance.
His gaze swept over those that were gathered and his mouth turned down. Neither Elora nor his sisters were present but the sun had only just set. There was still plenty of time for them to join them. He’d been kicked out of the house earlier, given the difficult task of getting Leo calmed enough before he was herded off with the other children. He’d nearly run out of stories to tell before the boy had been satisfied. Although, the little boy had still managed to wrangle a promise out of his uncle for more come the morrow. It had been painfully obvious that the boy had known that Cullen would be leaving soon to visit the other holds and he’d been desperate for as much time with his uncle as possible.
"Why the heavy sigh, Thane? Are you not excited to claim your Lowlander again?”
He half turned to look at the woman standing near his seat and grunted at the grin on her face. “Liv.”
"Aye, that is my name and not the answer to my questions.”
"Excitement has nothing to do with what I’m feeling right now,” he said lowly.
"You worry about the future, as you always do.”
Cullen looked back at the flames. “One of us has to.”
I set this in the lowlander so I hope that’s okay!
Blinkingawake, Elora groggily stared into the darkness around her and tried not to betoo cranky. She hadn’t been sleeping well for the last few weeks, never feelingcomfortable no matter how she lay. Being awake right now was not something thatshe wanted.
She sighedquietly. It was still dark out so she didn’t want to be awake. Trying not tothink so that she could go back to sleep, she cuddled as much as she could intothe bed. She could smell the rich scent of the fire burning, the heavier musk ofthe man behind her, and the winter air that crept into the house no matter howthey warded against it. A small tug pulled the covers up under her nose and shesnuggled into her pillow.
Cullenshifted on his side of the bed and she felt him brush against her as he rolled.She was half tempted to roll over to cuddle into him but that would requiremoving.
Her nosewrinkled slightly as she heard the excited whispers on the wisps around her. Hadthey woken her? It wouldn’t surprise her at all. Since Hawke had announced thatElora was pregnant to the clan, it felt like there had been nothing but nonstopchatter in her ears. She wasn’t sure she knew what silence was anymore and itwasn’t like she was going to be getting it once the baby was born.
A smallsmile curled her lips as she thought about that. A baby. She was having a babythat she would be allowed to raise and love. Whimpering softly as tears stungher eyes, Elora quickly smushed her face into the pillow to keep quiet. Thewisps had a horrible habit of kicking up a fuss every time she cried and didn’tseem to realise that tears didn’t always mean bad things. They let the entirehold know every time she so much as had an emotional wibble and she was sotired of it.
She nearlyjumped out of her skin when a hand settled on her waist, or what was left ofit, and slid around to stroke her stomach. Oh. Was he awake? Had she woken him?Or had the spirits without her reaslising? Did she say something? What if he was still sleeping?
Chills ranthe length of her when he buried his face in her hair and inhaled deeply. “Cullen?”she whispered.
“Aye, love,”he murmured. “Why aren’t you sleeping?”
“I don’tknow,” she sighed. “Something woke me up. Maybe it was the baby.”
His handshifting against her stomach again. “Not letting your mama sleep, are you, cub?”Cullen chuckled. “I thought that was my job.”
Eloralaughed weakly before squealing as Cullen ducked under the covers but merelypulled them off of her. “Cullen, it’s cold!” she protested, making a grab forthe blankets.
She snaggeda couple of them and hauled them up to cover herself even as he helped her rollonto her back. She thought she heard him shush her when she made a disgruntlednoise but it was lost through the thick furs of the blankets.
“What areyou doing?” she whispered, lifting the furs to try to peek at him. It didn’twork since it was far too dark to see but it let her hear much better.
Her lashesclosed as she listened to Cullen softly sing his way through the lullabyRosalie had taught her so many months ago to help soothe Cullen when he’d beenbedridden. She pulled the covers over her head to cocoon them in warmth and thesound of his rich voice going through the lines of the song.
Wip Wednesday again so here’s a teaser for next week’s Lowlander because I don’t know if I have anything else to share D:
She nearly jumped out of her skin, lost in thought and staring at the fires, when the door suddenly opened. Swallowing her fear, she pushed to her feet and started to gather her mana. She doubted their protectors would let just anyone through but there was only a chance.
“I can feel you.”
Her shoulders slumped at the quiet voice and she let go of her growing mana. Shifting so she could see the open door, she didn’t move further than that. Elora stared at the other woman as she stood in the doorway. She couldn’t see much with the dawn light behind her so she didn’t know what to expect from her. “Hawke,” she said softly.
“Elora,” she responded. “Are you going to attack me?”
She shook her head, her cheeks feeling hot. “I won’t apologise for reacting the way I did.”
“I don’t want you to,” Hawke said. “You were protecting your thane and the man you love. I showed up without warning in your bedroom. If you’d done anything less, I would have doubted your dedication to him.”
Hawke hadn’t been here for months. How did she know about that? Although…they had been sharing a bed. “Do you doubt me?”
“No,” she said shaking her head. “But that isn’t why I came to talk to you.”
Elora’s heart pounded in her chest as the other woman closed the door and came further into the room. She watched as Hawke moved to the table and put her hand on Branson’s head when he stirred. “What did you do?” she asked when he stilled again.
“I want to talk to you first and I can’t do that if his family is asking questions.”
That wasn’t telling her what she had done but she was getting the feeling that Hawke was unlikely to answer a lot of her questions. But she did see the way she relaxed once she was seated. “Are you alright?”
Icy eyes flicked to her. “No, but that doesn’t matter right now. What matters is what happened to Cullen. The god said you were scared of what happened.”
“Where I come from people are killed for possession,” she whispered. “They become abominations and are killed.”
How do you think Elora would be different if she'd be raised with the Avvar instead of in the Chantry? (There's a few point in The Lowlander when Cullen wishes Ells was born among his people and I was just curious what difference you could actually see happening.)
Weeeell, you’re in luck because this is actually something I’ve thought about and talked with Luci about as well. I was going to originally have it be in the story but I’m not sure if it will or not. Consider this a lost half of a chapter <3
Idlyflipping the pages of her book, Elora knew she wasn’t really focusing on thewords. It wasn’t that she’d already read it that was preventing her fromenjoying it. Something had been on her mind all day and she hadn’t been able toshake it. It hadn’t helped that it had been raining since before she had wokenup this morning and it hadn’t let up at all so she had been stuck inside withonly her thoughts.
“I can hearyou sighing from here, love,” Cullen called suddenly.
She smiled,shaking her head. She hadn’t even realised that she’d been doing it. Or thathe’d been aware of it. “I’m sorry?” she called back, tucking the thick ribbonshe used as a bookmark into the book before setting it aside.
“For what?You’ve nothing to be sorry for unless you don’t tell me why you’re sighing.”
Her smilegrew and she kicked her legs over the side of the bed. Reaching down to thefloor, she caught up her slippers and tugged them on. “What will you do if Idon’t tell you? Spank me?”
Hislaughter filled the house. “Aye, well, I think you’d enjoy that too much,” hesaid, looking up at her as she came around the fur. “Come here, love.”
She crossedthe room to where he was sitting, several short beams of wood in front of him.“Wait,” she said when he started to put down the one in his hand. “May I see?”
He turnedit so she could see what he’d been carving into the wood.
Lightlyrunning her fingers over the shapes, she smiled at the little bears amid theleaves. “It looks wonderful, Cullen,” she murmured, rubbing her thumb against asmall bird she found hiding between the bears and leaves. “It’s going to be soamazing when you’re done.”
“Thank you,love,” he chuckled, setting the piece aside. “Although, I don’t know how muchmore my hands can take.”
She caughthis hand and lifted it to her mouth to kiss his fingers gently. There werelittle nicks on his skin where the knife had caught flesh but not as many aswhen he had first started. “You’re getting better though.”
“Flatterer.”He broke her grip to hold her hands and tug her down onto the bench beside him.“But we weren’t going to talk about the cradle.”
Leaning herhead against his shoulder, she stared at the flames for a moment and fought notto sigh again. “I’ve just been thinking about something you said.”
“Did itupset you?”
“No. Itjust made me think.”
He shiftedbeside her. “What was it?”
“About howlife would have been different if I’d been born to the Avvar,” she admitted.
“Ah,” hesaid softly. “I didn’t mean that where you come from isn’t good, Elora. I knowyou suffered but we found each other eventually.”
She tippedher head back to smile at him. “I know and I wasn’t the only one thatsuffered,” she said. “But it just made me curious about how life would have been different if I’d been born in the clan.”
Cullenhummed low in his throat, his brows drawing together faintly. “You wouldn’thave been punished when you came into your magic,” he said quietly, “but youalready know that. You would have been trained alongside the others to findyour talents. I think…I think my mother would have trained you personally.”
“Why do yousay that?”
“The godslove you, Elora, and she would have taken note of that.”
She flexedher left hand. “They wouldn’t have even known about me without this.”
“You’rewrong,” he murmured. “I told you, they spoke of you ten years before you evencame to the hold. The mark is what brought you to us but it isn’t what theyvalue.”
She smiledshyly at him. “I don’t think I’m ever going to be used to that,” she admitted.
Cullenlifted her hand to kiss it gently. “You’ll have a lifetime to get used to it,my love.”
She cuddledcloser to him, winding her arms around his waist and letting him tug her intohis lap without protest. A lifetime here…Maker, she didn’t even know what tothink of that even though she knew it was true. “Alright, so your mother mighthave trained me. Like an apprentice?”
“Like hersuccessor.”
Elorajerked away to stare at him. “To be augur?” she said in surprise. “Oh, no, Idon’t think I would make a good augur.”
“Aye, wellyou were born a Lowlander,” he said, a smile curving his mouth. “If you’d beenborn Avvar?”
“Oh,” shesaid, blinking quickly. “Oh.”
Cullenchuckled. “Forgetting everything bad that happened,” he continued. “You wouldhave been raised in our home with my mother teaching you all that she knew. Youwould have grown to be a powerful mage in our clan and…Korth, half the clanwould have surely danced for you when you were old enough to be at Rilla’sfires.”
She wasn’tsure if she liked that thought. “If we’d grown up together, would you haveviewed me as a sibling? Like Alistair?”
“Alistairwas a part of our family because he lost his. You would still have family butwould merely be training with my mother.” Warm, rough fingers slid under herchin to tip her up to him. “I would have loved you from the first, Elora,” hesaid softly. “And I would have been first to dance for you.”
“You don’tknow that,” she whispered, feeling shaky.
“Aye, I do.This life or the next or any other, I will always love you. I have never feltlike this for anyone else and I don’t want to. You are my wife and I want noother.”
She bitdown on her lip, unable to look away from him. “Oh.”
The cornerof his mouth twitched, pulling up further because of the scar. “Once you wereold enough, I would have offered to court you,” he breathed. “I’ve always knownthat I would court someone, that I wouldn’t be happy with anything short ofwhat my parents had, and I would have danced for you so we could have ittogether.”
Her heartwas aching that none of that had been true. If she’d been born here, it wouldhave been true. Instead they had both gone through so much pain before fate hadsomehow thrown them together. “How old do you have to be to court?”
“We’readult at sixteen winters,” Cullen murmured, “but normally it would be betweeneighteen and twenty when courting would be accepted.”
So theycould have had at least eight years of being married and children by now. “Iwish I had been born here,” she whispered thickly.
He wipedaway the tear that spilled over and kissed her forehead. “Aye, I wish it too,Elora, but as much as I want it, I’m not sure if it would have been for thebest. What happened in the clan couldn’t be avoided and you may well have foundyourself on the Mad’s wrong side. This has worked for us in the end.”
She sniffedand let her head rest on his shoulder again. He was probably right but just thethought of growing up here was enough to make her heart heavy. She would havebeen loved, would have seen her family every day. The mere thought of it wasenough to make her sob for what could have been. “What if I hadn’t been born inthe hold?” she asked, trying to distract herself.
“Mm, Iwould have found you,” he said after a moment.
“You meanstolen.”
Hechuckled. “Haven’t forgotten that bit have you? Aye, I would have stolen you butit’s not like you wouldn’t have a choice in the matter. We don’t run into otherholds and just take all their women. There are rules.”
“You knowfor a supposedly savage people you do have a lot of rules.”
“We mightnot have survived for as long as we have without them. We follow what the godshave commanded as best we can and we honour them as much as we can. Thatincludes taking a bride from another clan. It’s customary to warn the clanbefore you attempt to steal the one you want.”
“Attempt?”
“They don’tmake it easy, love. Once a woman is married into another clan, they are herclan and it is unlikely that she will ever be welcomed back in her old home. Itis a commitment like any other, perhaps more so, and we take that seriously.The clan will lay traps to slow you down, to send you in the wrong direction,and it’s your job to not get caught.”
“Whathappens if they do catch you?” Elora asked curiously.
“Nothingbad. The only thing that truly gets hurt is your pride. They’ll give youanother chance but after that you’re not worthy of their women and need to lookelsewhere.”
“Do thewomen have no say in it at all?”
“Of coursethey do. If she isn’t willing, it’s unlikely that anyone will get through thetraps that her hold will lay down to protect her. If she is, there will stillbe tests but they’ll be suited to whoever is attempting to steal her and easyfor them to surpass if they truly wish to be with her.”
“And youwould have surpassed them for me?” she murmured.
“My Elora,with your magic you would have been greatly valued in your hold and even if youwere willing, your clan would not have made it easy for me to take you. Itwouldn’t have been a simple matter of tests suited to me. It would have beenalmost impossible to get to you without being caught.” He paused and his cheekrested on the top of her head. “But I would have gotten to you, no matter thecost.”
“I loveyou,” she whispered. “I love you so much.”
“Aye, Ilove you too, Elora, and I would have done anything to have you in my life asmy wife.”
Slumpingagainst him, she let his words warm her, taking comfort in them.
“You aremore than I could have ever dreamt of and I will always be grateful that youwere brought into my life when I needed you most.”
She kissedhis chest and stayed right where she was. Her life would have been so differentif she’d been born an Avvar and no matter what he said, she knew it would havebeen better.
“Don’t letit get you down, Elora,” Cullen said softly. “You’re here now. The gods wantedus to be together and we found each other eventually. I don’t know if either ofus would have been ready for the other if it had been sooner.”
“We wouldhave been ready if I’d been Avvar.”
“Aye, butyou weren’t,” he said gently, “and we can’t change that.”
Pushingaway from his chest, she looked at him and murmured, “But I’m Avvar now.”
He cuppedthe back of her head and pulled her close. “Aye, you’re Avvar now, but you’llalways be my Lowlander,” Cullen breathed before kissing her.
@razzmatash‘s “The Lowlander” inspired my a little aesthetic (sort of). I’m so happy every time that she publishes something new about Thane Cullen Liosbane and his Lowlander Elora Trevelyan. It is always pure joy reading her works!
The wonderful @meihua04 prompted me about cold toes with my babies and I couldn’t resist. A little bit of Avvar playfulness below!
Feeling Elora slump against him, Cullen didn’t think much of it. He knew she was tired and he felt bad about how hard they had pushed today but he had wanted to put as much distance between them and the hold as he could. He hadn’t cared for the way she had been talked to while they’d been there and since the rift was closed, he wanted gone. They’d stayed long enough to not seem rude but he’d hustled his Lowlander out as soon as he could.
She hadn’t complained, much. He knew her feet hurt and she’d been out of breath a lot, but she hadn’t asked to stop. They’d still taken breaks for her and their own sake, but they’d been few and far between.
He smiled faintly as he remembered Elora’s sigh of relief when he’d told her they were stopping for the evening. No one had said anything when she had sunk onto a fallen tree but he’d seen the smiles on his hunters’ faces as they’d set up camp. They thought the Lowlander almost as cute as he did.
They’d already eaten and were simply telling stories around the fire before most retired to their tents. Elora had been entranced by the stories, asking curious questions before she’d started to fall quiet and simply listen.
A chuckle across the fire drew his attention. “You might want to tuck in, Lionsbane. Your Lowlander’s dead to the world.”
“What?” Cullen looked down at Elora and nearly started laughing. He had thought that she simply wanted to cuddle because they’d decided before that they would keep their relationship a secret while visiting the other holds. He hadn’t overly wanted to but he wasn’t sure how the other holds would react to him taking a Lowlander for his wife. He had known that if he simply left it that she was a guest of the gods it would demand respect from the other holds as well.
But cuddling clearly wasn’t on her mind as she was asleep on his shoulder.
“Aye, I suppose that means that we’re done for the night,” Cullen agreed.
Elora made a disgruntled noise as he gently shifted her off of his shoulder. She sleepily blinked at him before sighing as he scooped her off of their seat. He did laugh when she waved lazily at the hunters as they said their good nights.
She was warm and soft in his arms as he carried her into their tent, using the small spelled jar inside to see by. Kneeling beside the furs of their pallet, he carefully laid her out. As soon as he set her down, she wrapped herself up in the furs, making happy noises the entire time.
“Elora,” Cullen laughed, “your boots are still on and are you going to sleep in all of that?”
She rolled onto her back and pouted at him. “But I’m sleepy.”
“Aye, love, I can see that, but you still shouldn’t sleep with them on.”
The furs shuffled and she stuck her feet out from it. “Please?”
He chuckled and unlaced the ties around the leather. “Is this what our marriage will be?”
“What? Happy and cuddly?”
Cullen shook his head, smiling to himself. He tugged her boots off to set them aside before he pulled off the majority of his clothes. With the amount of blankets she had, he was liable to overheat if he joined her fully dressed. Slipping onto the other side of the pallet, he merely gave Elora a look when she rolled to face him, completely wrapped in the blankets. “Are you going to share?” he asked mildly.
“I thought you didn’t get cold,” she teased.
He snorted and helped her unwrap herself from the furs, spreading them out over the pair of them. “Go to sleep, love.”
She promptly did just that, her face smooshed into the pallet.
He’d clearly underestimated how tired she actually was. “Tomorrow will be better, my Lowlander,” he murmured, kissing her hair.
Settling beside her, he felt himself drifting off. But he jerked harshly when he felt something icy cold touch him. Elora made a sharp noise when he levered up.
“Whassat?” she mumbled.
He threw back the blankets, staring at her feet for a long moment. It couldn’t have been her feet. It couldn’t have been. “Elora….”
“Mm?”
Cullen rubbed the back of his neck, staring at the pale feet that had pulled him right out of a deep slumber. “Are you cold?” he asked hesitantly.
One eye opened to look at him. “You mean without the blankets?”
He frowned down at her, wondering if she was growing ill. Her feet had been cool in Sky-Bear Hold, but nothing like this. “Elora, love,” he said, shaking her awake. “Please, are you unwell?”
“No?” she said in confusion. “Why?”
“Your feet are like ice.”
“No, they aren’t,” she argued, shifting to try to press them against him again.
He swiftly moved away from her. He had no desire to feel that again. Maybe he should have left her boots on tonight.
“Cullen, did you just run away from me?”
“Your feet are bloody freezing, love.”
She rolled her eyes. “They are no-Oh.”
“Oh,” he said dryly as she jerked her hand back from where she’d touched her feet.
“Well, what do you expect?” she huffed. “We have fire runes tucked under our bed in Sky-Bear.”
Oh. They did. “Are you always like that?” he demanded, gingerly covering them with the blankets again and dreading the moment her skin touched his for once. Which was a strange turn of events since he normally relished it.
She hummed softly. “The Tower was usually overly warm. Between the heat the mages generate from burning mana and what the Templars kick out, it’s always warm. My toes would get cold I’m sure but I never noticed it?”
Probably because she didn’t have anyone to stick them on so how would she know they were that cold? He grumbled under his breath as he tried to get comfortable again.
Elora laughed, the sound low and husky. “Are you telling me that the brave and fearless Thane that I plan on marrying can’t handle cold toes?” she teased.
“There’s a difference between cold and the arse end of someone touched by Hakkon,” he growled.
She laughed again. “It wasn’t my arse,” she breathed.
“I am very familiar with that arse so trust me, love, I know it wasn’t.”
Elora giggled this time. “Well, me, my toes and my arse will be over here, away from your delicate bits,” she assured him.
He watched her rolls away from him, curling up on her side. “What are you doing?”
“Keeping my delicate Thane safe and warm,” she cooed at him over her shoulder.
Cullen stared at her back for a long moment before he growled shortly at her.
“What are you doing?” she murmured as he moved to curl around her.
“If you think cold toes are enough to defeat me, you’re wrong, Lowlander,” he muttered, tucking himself as close as he could get to her. He still hissed when her feet brushed his legs but he muffled it in her neck.
It didn’t do anything to muffle her soft laughter. “I’ll remember the rune next time,” she promised.
He made a face. Korth, he’d remember the rune next time to spare himself this.
Writing prompt from the shy smiling anon: I'm currently in love with this song by X Ambassadors called Unsteady it makes me think of Cullen. A couple of lines are "Hold onto me, cause I'm a lil unsteady" & "If you love me don't let go". ♡♡
Sorry about the delay! I had to think about this a bit and I was caught up in trying to write some other pieces. Hope you like! (Put it in the Lowlander au and the song reference is only slightly vague so I could make it work D: )
Pausingoutside of Cullen’s door, Elora tipped her head to the side at what she couldhear. “Shh,” she said, waving off the little wisps that took her sudden silenceas a chance to flutter around her excitedly.
Theygrumbled but she ignored it and tried to focus harder. It was muffled throughthe door and the voice was low, but someone was definitely singing.
She stoodthere, stunned. Cullen had caught her singing to herself a hundred times andnot once had he mentioned that he could sing as well. At least she was prettysure it was him. She didn’t think another man was going to go into their homeand start singing. It had to be him.
She twistedher fingers for a moment before giving in. There was no point in standingaround outside since she’d been coming home. She didn’t want to make him stopbut she opened the door as quietly as she could. A pout tugged at her lips whenthe song stopped immediately and she sighed. “I’m back,” she said, forcingherself to smile as she closed the door behind her.
“Aye, I seethat. How is she?”
“Grumpy,”Elora muttered. “Pregnancy doesn’t seem to suit her.”
He chuckledlowly. “I don’t know if I’d go so far. She’s always been grumpy.”
Elora keptsmiling as she hung up her cloak before crossing to him. He was sitting by thefire pit, carving something, but the way he was sitting had given him a clearview of the door. There was no way she would have been able to sneak in. “Ifyou say so.”
He setaside his knife and looped an arm around her waist. “You look thoughtful,” hesaid softly.
She settledon his thigh, leaning against him as he pulled her closer. “I’m never going tobe able to keep anything from you, am I?”
“Why wouldyou want to?” he asked in confusion.
She laughedand kissed his cheek. “Never mind.”
His mouthtwisted faintly. “What is it, Elora?” he prompted.
Twistinghis hair around her fingers, she went for it. “What were you singing?” Colour tinged his cheeks underthe stubble. “Ah, nothing special. You heard that, aye?”
She nodded.“I didn’t know you could sing.”
“Aye, well,I wouldn’t say I’m good at it.”
She kissedhim again. “I think you are, but I only heard you through the door.”
He smiledfaintly, but he was shifting and she knew he was embarrassed. “It’s not much,”he muttered.
“You stillhaven’t told me what you were singing,” she said gently. “You don’t have tosing for me. I was just curious about the song.”
Golden eyesmoved over her face before he sighed deeply and buried his face in her neck. Hestayed there for a few minutes before she heard him inhale slowly.
She triednot to react as he hummed a few notes before his low voice started singing. Buther heart had definitely skipped a beat. Listening as he sang for a littlewhile longer, she absently ran her fingers through his hair. “What does itmean?” Elora whispered as he fell quiet.
He kissedher collarbone, sighing deeply. “It’s an old song. I don’t…it wouldn’t soundthe same in this tongue.”
She was alittle disappointed but she let her cheek rest against him.
“It speaksof being…unsteady,” he said, sounding unsure. “Of asking another to not let yougo if they love you.”
He had saidthe last bit quietly enough that she almost didn’t catch it. She turned enoughto kiss him again. “Were you singing it for any particular reason? Doubting myfeelings for you?”
His headlifted and his eyes were dark. “No, my Elora. I know how you feel. It was just…thefirst thing that I thought of.”
She loopedher arms around his neck. “I won’t let you go,” she said softly.
His handtightened on her hip. “That mean you love me, Lowlander?” he asked lowly.
So out of curiosity, how to asexual Avaars fit into the culture? While I get that part of the reason the sex is important is for children, are asexuals denied the chance for an eternal marriage if they aren't comfortable having sex? Or having a marriage at all, for that matter?
Hi! I will freely admit that I’m not very knowledgeable aboutasexuals so I apologize in advance if I say anything incorrect in regards tothem. I’m trying my best but this isn’t my strong suit so be gentle. Please? And tucking under a cut because this got long.
So I’ll admit that when I first thought of the Fire Dance, Iwasn’t thinking beyond hetero couples simply for the fact that that’s 99% ofwhat I write. That being said, that doesn’t mean that I’m not open to changingthings or expanding the lore which is exactly what I’ve been doing this morningwith help from my lovely Luci ( @magisteramell).
In Bioware canon, the Avvar actually marry through aceremony where one partner sings a prayer to a particular god of their choicewhile the other undoes knots on a knotted rope. When the song is done, theamount of knots undone equals the years of marriage that they’ll have. The Avvardon’t believe in permanence in anything so this applies to their marriages aswell and as far as I’m concerned, this isn’t restricted by sexuality. Anyone cancommit to this no matter who they wish to be with.
But I wanted more than just that which was why I created theFire Dance and it is rooted in sexuality and sexual desire. The eternalmarriage that I tied to it was because I didn’t want Elora and Cullen to onlyhave a few years and have to separate because I didn’t like that. And as I saidabove, since I write mostly heterosexuals that’s all I was thinking about whenI first made it. But as I was developing and writing the actual Lowlanderstory, I kind of realised that anyone who experiences sexual desire is allowedto dance, no matter what their sexual orientation is.
For those that do not experience sexual attraction/desire,they aren’t out of luck when it comes to eternal marriage. It’s just a slightlydifferent procedure/format/process (none of those words feel right but I can’tthink of something that does fit what I’m trying to say). The Fire Dance’s areRilla’s (in game she’s billed as the goddess of the fireside and of makingbabies so that more applies to the courtship part of the fire dances not somuch the night of pleasure part of it) but that doesn’t mean that there aren’tother gods that can give their blessing to an eternal marriage.
Now please keep in mind, what we know about the Avvar isvery limited and a lot of what Iwrite lore wise in Lowlander is me making it up with what I feel is appropriate and proper forthe story and how I see the Avvar over all.
The way I see it is that for those that do not experiencesexual attraction/desire the Fire Dance would not work for them. But they canapproach the augur to speak with the gods on their behalf to bless their unionbecause the eternal marriage of the Fire Dance isn’t as much about the sex asit is about the union of two souls into one. Who they want to be with (or how) isn’tthat important, so long as the love and commitment is there. After the augurcomes back to them, they proceed with the courtship as if they had danced atRilla’s fires under the guidance and blessing of whichever god spoke to theaugur. The Thane and elder’s council would be informed of the situation only sothat they are aware of the courtship outside of the Fire Dance to keep anyunpleasantness from arising in the clan if people thought that the couple wastrying to skirt the rules of the Fire Dance.
So honestly, it’s a case by case kind of thing that is leftin the hands of the gods/spirits. The couple is still expected to go throughthe two/three month’s courtship that those who danced at the fires do. This isstill an eternal matching and you want to be sure before you completely commityourself to another person so the same protection is there as it is at the FireDance. For the nights of the Fire Dance, the couple still spends it together asthe others do. They follow the same steps at the dances which I haven’t reallycovered in the story, but there are certain things that are done at the secondand third dance to show that the person is being courted to keep others fromaccidentally dancing for someone who is courting/being courted by someone else.This more applies at larger clan gatherings since within a hold most peopleknow who’s courting whom.
I think that’s all I can think of regarding this. If youhave more questions or if I haven’t answered something, feel free to message meagain. You can also message me off anon, if you feel comfortable of course,because I’ll for sure answer questions privately if that’s what you’d like andif you’d like to have a longer conversation about it. Or if you have any otherquestions about this au or any of my other ones always feel free to ask! Alsoplease don’t think that I’m ignoring you if it takes a little while for me torespond to you. I get a lot of these kinds of asks while I’m asleep and when Iwake up in the morning my first response usually won’t be as in depth as Iwould want. I like to actually think about it, especially if it’s reworking orexpanding the lore in my aus.
So thank you for the ask and I hope I answered yourquestion!
