#tolkien crack

[pumkin-patchwork]

Huan and Lúthien approach Sauron at Tol-in-Gaurhoth, FA 465

[maglorslostsilmaril]

i am a very serious artist 👍👍

og under cut

[ffigwit]

this came to me at 4 am as I cleaned up cat puke btw

[lady-of-ithilien]

Which Tolkien characters will you go on a road trip with?

Picker Wheel - Spin the Wheel to Decide a Random Choice

Picker Wheel is a wheel spinner for a random picker. Various functions & customization. Enter choices or names, spin the wheel to decide a r

Spin the wheel up to three times and determine who is going in your car for a multi-day road trip. How is the road trip going? Will you make it to your destination successfully (or alive)?

[abomination-unto-nuggan]

Hi my name is Mairon Lord of Dark’ness Annatar Gorthaur Evil-Way and I have long fair hair (because my form is fair) and fiery eyes shining like silmarils. I am related to Aulë but I wish I wasn't because he’s a major fucking boomer. I’m a vampire and a werewolf and a deity. I have pale white skin. I’m also a necromancer, and practice Dark Magyck in a Dark Fortress called Angband in Middle Earth where I’m the Dark Lord's Lieutenant (and Boyfriend). I’m goth (in case you couldn’t tell) and I wear mostly black. I was walking in the mountains outside Angband. It was snowing and raining so I couldn't see Arien's stupid face, which I was very happy about. Maedhros glared at me from Thangorodrim. I put up my middle finger at him

[pigsducksflowers]

I love thinking about the Fëanorians as a Weird Family™️ even in Valinor so they do Weird Things like biting, licking, kissing. Just family things for these little freaks.

And then those things have to be toned down dramatically in ME. Celegorm goes to bite Maedhros post thangorodrim and gets two teeth knocked out (they grow back. Don’t worry. Elves are like sharks to me) but they all have to adjust to the trauma because they do not like Maedhros look at them with such fear and pain.

After the Bragollach, Maglor can’t stand being licked because that’s what Glaurung’s voice felt like.

The Oath slowly poisons these family acts of love/affection because how can they do so when their father was damned. They have other things to focus on like retrieving the Silmarils and staying alive in general.

Maglor is very nostalgic and slowly brings these acts back with the twins because it’s a fresh start and he longs for a happy family.

And so Elrond is just Like That and everyone in Eregion and Lindon have to adjust to council meetings where the royals and others in high positions end up biting, sitting in each others laps and just be overly affectionate and strange.

And yes, this tradition spread to the entire house of Finwë because this whole family is very feral.

[softie-draws]

So, I've been researching making merch lately (cause I've wanted to make my own merch for the longest time) and then I realised that they didn't just print on hoodies, mugs or t-shirts, they kinda print on everything, including, well, underwear.

Which makes me wonder what the best Tolkien-related print on a piece of underwear would be for you? Funny answers only.

[hopecomesbacktolife]

I’ve been enjoying Philomena Cunk recently and just found this (incredible) meme and subsequent comments while looking for a different meme

I would give so many nauglamirs to see a Cunk on (Middle)Earth show omg