Trans Light headcanons !!!!!
First of all: I would like to subscribe to your train of thought, because it’s some good stuff if I do say so myself I say so! Alright, some Trans!Light coming right up! This ended up being a bit longer than I anticipated, so it will be under a cut. It only reaches until he finds the Death Note, but might do the divergences in the plot if requested.
Light was two months away from being 15 when he realised what was happening. All the confusion, all those feelings he had… He felt relieved to finally understand it, because he hated it when he didn’t know something.
Three seconds after his realisation, he felt terrified. The world was rotten, and trans people weren’t exactly accepted in society.
The first person he told was Sayu. Even though she didn’t understand much of it, she told him she loved him, but to give her a bit of time to get what it meant. Light was a bit gloom, but understood. That same night, she got as much information as possible after their conversation.
Three days later, she just went into his room, hugged Light very tightly, and called him “big brother” for the first time. Light will forever deny he almost teared up.
Light coming home one day after school with a man’s uniform, asking her to cut his hair so he could come out to their parents. He couldn’t take it anymore.
She was holding his hand when he told his parents. Sachiko cried a lot, saying she didn’t intend this to happen, deep in denial, apologising to Light for failing as a role model. Soichiro got up and left without a word, not coming back for days.
The same night he came out, Sayu went to sleep to his room, trying to calm him down, but she could do little to nothing, as she was almost as much as a mess as him. They cried until exhaustion finally reached them.
At school next day, they mostly ignored Light. After all, there were some girls on a gang that dressed with the masculine uniform. He was grateful for the staff not caring about the situation. His friends asked about it, but he just shrug it off, not really wanting to share the news. There were only a couple of months left of school before changing to a different high school, where he would not know anyone. A place to start anew.
When Soichiro finally came back, he didn’t acknowledge Light at all. For weeks, Light tried to just endure it, but it got so bad, Sayu got angry and, while they all had dinner, asked him if he didn’t want to be Light’s father anymore. Soichiro just looked at her, then at Light, and with a pained expression, told them “I’m the father of an only child”.
A slap on the face would’ve hurt less.
After that, both Sayu and Light stuck together. They protected each other, they helped each other. It was them against the world. Light knew that, without his sister, he wouldn’t have been able to go through all of it.
On his birthday, Sayu gave him his first binder. He kept asking her where she got the money, but she wouldn’t tell him.
She actually stole it from Soichiro bit by bit, she had been planning on buying one since she called him big brother.
Sayu was the only one who went to his graduation. His mother said she was sick. His father stayed at work. Light was slowly getting better at tuning out the rejection. It only hurt him a little.
Despite both his parents being in denial, they still signed all the school paperwork. He managed to enter a private academy, one that none of his old classmates could get into. One that didn’t make any gendered separation, like on PE. He felt content and hopeful.
The first day of class, before it started, Light talked with his teachers, asked them to call him Light. He knew it was a really forced pronunciation of his kanji, but he hoped to pass it off as a weird quirk of his parents. Teachers agreed, and he almost danced out of happiness.
He offered his parents to go with the doctor with him. After some persuasion, they agreed when Light was already 16. They went in hopes to be told how to “cure” it. But the doctor just diagnosed Light with GID. Sayu was as happy as Light, and jumped up and down with him while hugging each other.
The doctor talked with his parents, and he helped Sachiko to, at least, not mistreat him any longer. He couldn’t help being like that, she thought. Light wasn’t exactly happy with her pity, but he wasn’t one to turn down a chance to make amends with her.
Soichiro was still convinced it was a weird phase, but let Sachiko handle it, he just couldn’t do it. Their relationship had been broken for years, and Light couldn’t be hurt any further by this.
At age 17, Sachiko finally allowed Light to start all the process of transitioning. Sayu and Light celebrated with a sleepover party. Those were a regular thing.
Light found the Death Note, and his struggles made clear to him that his world needed a change. The system was corrupt. The world was rotten.
His sister, the one who practically saved his life on multiple occasions, the brightest star of his sky, didn’t deserve to live in a world where evil was free to hurt her.
She had protected Light from the very beginning. It was his duty to protect her back.
That’s what big brothers do.
