Adrian: (Gasps) Uncle Jaune! Uncle Jaune, get up! We need help!
Jaune: Adrian... I... Stay with me?
Adrian: Uh-huh!
Jaune: Okay... I'm gonna call Team RWBY, okay?
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Meanwhile, with Team RWBY
Blake: (In the pool, Swaying to the music)
Yang: Damn, she is THROWIN' that Bellabooty~!
Ruby: Yang, you gotta get behind that!
Yang: Should I?
Ruby: Yeah, go for it~!
Yang: Alright. (Down drink) Imma do it. (Walks over)
Ruby: (Sees Yang's scroll ring) Yang, Jaune's calling you! Yang? Alright, whatever. (Answers) Hey, Jaune~! What's up~?
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Jaune: I'm- I'm on speaker. Listen, I'm a little woozy, so who is this and where's Team RWBY? I tried calling Yang and-
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Ruby: Oh, this is Ruby, and Yang is, uh... She's busy.
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Jaune: Is... Is the rest of Team RWBY with you? And all the other huntsman teams?
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Ruby: You mean like Yang and Blake, who are just making the fuck out right now?
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Jaune: Listen, I need you guy's help! I'm here with my nephew... All of Argus is being destroyed. All of my enemies are attacking at the same time. I need help. I need help, I can't beat them all!
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Ruby: Ah... See, the thing is... We're all out of town right now, man. We're way too far right now.
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Ruby: (Via scroll) Way too far, man.
Jaune: You guys are huntresses! What are y- Okay, look, what about my team? Can you send the rest of Team JNPR?
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Ruby: Yeah, the thing about that is...
Nora: (On top of Ren on a floatie, Kissing)
Ren: (Groping Nora as they float by)
Ruby: ...they're here, too. They're out of town, too. Big RWBY JNPR joint thing. In fact, we were about to run a train on Oscar, know what I'm sayin'? And- Wait, wait! Hey, Nora! Hey! Where's Oscar? When's the train being run on him?
Nora: What? That thing started two minutes ago!
Ruby: What?! Why didn't anybody tell me?! Who's going first?
Nora: Going first... Going fir- Oh! It's Penny! Penny's goin' first!
Ruby: WHAT?! That bitch knows she's supposed to go last!
Nora: I mean, I got my man, so I ain't goin' to stop her.
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Ruby: How am I supposed to compete with a literal machine, man?!.
Jaune: LISTEN TO ME! I NEED YOUR HELP! I CAN SEE MY TEAM IS NOT THAT FAR!
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Jaune: (Via scroll) THERE'S NO WAY! NORA CAN LITERALLY FLY! Hell, Penny can also fly AND she never gets tired, right?!.
Ruby: Tch... Yeah, but she's impatient as fuck apparently.
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Ruby: I mean, damn, dude, I know my grip is good, but it's not factory reset good.
Jaune: Hey- Hey, buddy?
Adrian: (Sniffles) Yeah?
Jaune: Talk to her. You can convince her. I know you can.
Adrian: Okay...
Jaune: Say something to her.
Adrian: (Takes scroll)
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Adrian: (Via scroll) Um, Miss Ruby? We need your help! They're... the villains are attacking the city and... They- They killed my moms! And I don't know how long me and Uncle Jaune can survive!.
Ruby: Hey, uh... I'm... I'm not gonna lie, little buddy.
Ruby: ...You're cooked. You're cooked.
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Adrian: Wha-
Ruby: That's just a tough situation. But, uh, Jaune, dude... We- We- I'm gonna be real with you, it's not our series. It's not our series, not our story. Not in the budget. So, we're not gonna head over there, man. I'm not gonna lie, you should probably tap into that main protagonist plot armor the fans keep sayin' you have, 'cause, if not... Your story is gonna be shorter than Combat Ready, y'know what I mean~? But yeah, I- I gotta be next on Oscar. I can already hear the vibrations from over here, so... I know Penny's not going easy on him. But hey- Hope you make it~!. (Hangs up)
Adrian: What n-
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Ruby: (Walks over) Hey, Emerald~! Sun~! Enjoyin' the party~?
