#trigger warning: ocd

[chappydev]

i've been relapsing into my OCD compulsions again and it fucking sucks. idk why but all my methods aren't working anymore. i know that the last thing i should be doing is indulging the compulsions, it just makes it worse, but i find myself snorting and touching my stomach and checking doors repeatedly, after nearly a year of being more or less clean

just, fuck it sucks

[abstract-moth]

OCD mention

possibly triggering please be careful

I know it's so bad but I can literally feel the endorphins firing off in my brain as I complete my compulsions at the end of the day.

currently having to spend very close quarters with family and oh man. those sweet sweet compulsions are so nice and relaxing to come back to at the end of the day. gives me a sense of control and order.

I know it's bad and I need to work on decreasing my compulsions.

but hell.

not when I'm forced to spend time with family.

these are literally the people that made it so I had compulsions in the first place.

[asherisawkward]

Hey, is everything okay? You said that you don't like to discuss animal abuse, but that question about pokemon was just about that. Everything is fine?

I’m okay. I meant animal abuse when it comes to real animals/animals that exist in real life. It’s a bit different for me about Pokémon because I’m not in the fandom or really knowledgeable about them.

But the reason that stuff is usually a no-no is because I have some pretty awful intrusive thoughts, particularly relating to my pet puppies. I can barely pick up a kettle without my brain going “What if you spilled that on them? Do you think their skin would bubble up and blister or bleed? What would the sound be like?”

It really messes with me and causes a lot of nausea/self disgust/other issues. I don’t use the kettle anymore. Talking about real animals, like dogs or cats (even fictional ones), just gets a bit too close to that and can be not exactly triggers me, but it can ruin my day or appetite or ability to interact with my pets for a while. So, I prefer to not talk about that stuff regarding closer to reality situations.

But I’m fine. Thanks for asking. I hope this clears it up for you.

[everybodyelsedying]

~

((So I have to take antibiotics because of my dental issues and I’m freaking out really bad. I have obsessive compulsive disorder that focuses mostly on obsessions. Taking medications is a huge trigger for me and The antibiotic he prescribed has all horror stories online. I want to not to take it but I’m afraid it will get worse))

[aniallhation]

Since that asshole tried to tell me my OCD wasn't real it's actually gotten so much worse like I can't stop repeating things and I can't sleep because I just keep saying things over and over and over again moral of the story don't you ever fucking dare try and tell someone what disorders they do and don't have you have no fucking right

[mercipourlememories]

  I might have OCD, and it's freaking me out. Usually when people say OCD you think of people having an extremely organize place and washing their hands 20 times peer hour, so I never thought that counting the sides of letters, the times of songs was actually a problem.

Yes, it does give me headaches, like,  the first time I heard 17 by Sky Ferreira I couldn't sleep correctly and I couldn't concentrate in class but, again, because I've always had this stuff, I didn't care. Or words as "como" (how) or worse, "common" freaked me out, and just thinking about them makes me mad because they're super hard to write in my head.

I wish somebody had told me that no, it's really not that normal, and maybe I wouldn't spend the last 7 years of my life with this growing, stupid obsession.

[cryptidotter]

(Warning: discussion of OCD triggers)

Does anyone else with OCD find that Tumblr plays an oddly significant role in it? I always end up on Tumblr in one of two ways:

1) a fucking urge that I can't overcome. So basically a compulsion, though how many pages I have to scroll through and the type of tumblring I have to do varies from day to day. 8/10 times the compulsion vanishes if I see something that is hurtful to me personally. And some days I can resist the compulsion altogether.

2) The other reason I go to Tumblr is to avoid following through with some other compulsion. Scrolling through my dash, and certain patterns of liking/reblogging, are very soothing for my skin-related and cleaning compulsions. Again, the length and intensity of the Tumblring required is varied. 

IDEK like I don't even enjoy Tumblr most of the time, it's just the fucking OCD. Am I alone here?