#tw sorry

[goodnightngoth]

i have a hard time believing that young people have the lowest suicide rates because nobody talks about it as openly as we do and i think the vast majority of us use humor to mask the millstone of suicidal ideation that we walk around with all day every day

[ani-bunnie13]

one cut here, one cut there, do some more and no one will care.

[xbl00dturns2dustx]

WHY WONT THESE THOUGHTS LEAVE?! IVE BEEN TRYING FOR YEARS AND THEY WONT FUCKING GO AWAY??? Im so tired.

[midasinc]

just bc I like angst… do you think joly or bossuet died first at the barricade? (correct me if I’m wrong but I don’t think it’s ever specified)

because bossuet’s the unlucky one, id say he lived longer. you’d be lucky to be bahorel and go out without having to see any of your friends die in front of you. id like to think that bossuet only sees it out of the corner of his eye- just a split second. that’s enough to make you forgot to fight for just a moment, to wrap your head around what’s happened. just enough time to meet the barrel of a gun id assume

[theofficialdeannawinchester]

Trigger warning: anxiety, bullies, depression and other sensitive topic. Please look away if it too much triggering content for you.

Don’t judge a book like it cover...

No not being attention-seeker or to feel sorry about me. This is not a sob story. I just want to post in support for mental health awareness. I’m a private person this is the first time I’m telling my story.

I just wanted to get in habit of writing again honestly especially when I get in this moods again.

This is the first time I will open up about my personal struggles with severe anxiety and depression. And this is the first time I returned from writing even on break; my hiatus begin since like last year. It was late near me so I decided to do another late night thought essay.

I didn't find out when I have severe anxiety when I was 19 then when everything change for me. I didn't start to develop depression when I was 14. Writing always was a safe place and fun little stories then I created non de plume all the time. Fictional worlds always comfort me. That why I have trust issues mostly because bad experience profit from it.

It wasn't like that when I was younger at 9 I was carefree now I just overthink about everything.

I freak over little thing i’m sick of it.

It started to get worse when I was in my first ever discord group chat server it was nice and all until iron-dad server or chaos corner whatever it like we are all pals until they cyber bullied me (I been bullied all my life in real life, online also and dealing with several different parts of trauma; which i’m not getting in too. ) I’m not a bad person at all but I always have a short fuse so I finally snap at all of them. This is happen when you bottle up your emotion inside. I wish I told 18 year old self; but oh wow it in the past now.

I always was taught to stand up for yourself. If it in real life or online. Then we were forced to apologize to each other.

Which I was thought was totally unfair at the time I just wanted happiness since then when the era of love and loathe with social media begin. When you think you are having fun but you really not. Forced friendship is not fun. It was awkward even when I was trying to be myself it was frown upon then then when I finally distance myself from that server. Then not until this year I finally left for good and I was free...

No more toxic friendships or toxic people it not good for my soul I try to think the best of things even when things are tough. You are not alone whatever you are. 💚💕🌸

No anxiety or depression does not go right away but you are a fighter. Remember that always.

Edit: I’m now in therapy and was recently diagnosed with Adult ADHD; Mild ASD and PSTD/complex PSTD. I was told it may not go away but I can treat it and be resilience. I now have daily pills to cope with my ADHD. Talking with my therapist is my safe place. <3 Healing is a longtime recovery. I’m not ashamed of my mental health and struggles.

Days I’m offline: I’ll visit my specialist who diagnosed me daily on Thursdays. So i’m offline on those days. When i’m visiting my therapist it is Wednesday.

I mostly post on weekends now. I want to focus on Self-care.

[b0neless-gh0st]

Fucked up vocaloids in my head 24/7

Gomenne my beloved 

[nocturnal-dreams]

I just want my dad to say my actual name without disgust, is that too much to ask?

[logan-please-smile-speaks]

also- sorry for the recent scp au spam lmao- the brainrot has returned 😔