Hi! 😊 Could I request a kuroken oneshot with the prompt "i hate everybody - “if i could make you love me, maybe you could make me love me”" from Kenma’s perspective? Also I will go and donate to your ko-fi.
First of all. This took WAY longer than I intended, so I want to say a massive thank you for being so patient with me. Good grief. Also, you gave me six dollars! Which means you now own my entire heart, like I cannot thank you enough, seriously. Anyway, I adore Kuroken, so this was super wild to write and I ended up at nearly 3000 words asdfhllkjksdf I hope you enjoy!
Warnings: None
Words: 2755
Characters: Kenma, Kuroo
Notes: Kuroken, Kenma’s POV
Read it on AO3 by clicking here!
Prompt: I hate everybody - “If I could make you love me, maybe you could make me love me”
Kenma narrowed his eyes at the mirror in front of him, shuffling awkwardly from one foot to the other as he tugged at some of his hair that had come loose from the hair tie. The quiet of the room unsettled him slightly. He blew air up into his fringe, causing even more to come free and hang in his face. With a sigh he pulled the hair tie free and let his hair cascade down, falling a little past his shoulders. It really had gotten long, he didn’t hate that. Being able to have the long strands in the front to narrow his field of view, it made him feel… safer? A little more relaxed at least, despite what anyone else said about him being easier to surprise or sneak up on because of it. He slipped the hair tie onto his wrist and grabbed the brush off the dresser beside him. The large mirror hanging on their bedroom wall sometimes left Kenma feeling uncomfortable the longer he used it. As he brushed out his hair he found himself tugging at the blonde tips with mild frustration. He’d never bothered re-dyeing it, seemed too much effort. He wasn’t going blonde again, that had been enough of an attention attractor the first time. Dyeing it all back to black would be a waste of energy. He felt the brush snag for the second time and huffed, he should be doing more, trying harder with his appearance. He winced as he yanked the brush free, grumbling to himself until he felt a hand slide into his hair from behind.
“Ssshh don’t do that, you know it’ll only make it worse” came a low, comforting rumble from somewhere up and behind his head, another hand deftly pulling the brush out of his grip and continuing where he’d stopped, albeit with much more care. Kenma briefly locked eyes with a smiling Kuroo in the mirror and did his best to not show how quickly he relaxed under Kuroo’s gentle ministrations. A quiet chuckle told him he wasn’t doing a very good job of it.
“Shut up” he grumbled, earning him a snicker in response. A quiet beeping from near the roof told him his boyfriend had turned on the air conditioner as he entered their room. With Kuroo now paying attention to his hair, Kenma took the time to study the two of them in the mirror. Though Kenma would rather be caught dead then admit it aloud (unless he was particularly sleepy or tipsy), his boyfriend was handsome. His height, his build, his jawline, even his ridiculous hair all lended themselves toward the kind of guy other people on the college campus would throw themselves at. Kenma grimaced slightly as he took in his own reflection in comparison. The dark circles under his eyes, the baggy hoodie, his hunched shoulders, his hair that he didn’t put enough care into. It felt like the picture of the pair of them painted by the reflective glass’s value was being brought down by him even being there. This is why he didn’t like the mirror.
“Do you want your hair tied back up or loose?” Kuroo asked quietly by his ear, reaching down to tug at the tie still on his wrist. Kenma shrugged and looked away.
“Just out of the way, it’ll look stupid anyway” he muttered. Kuroo snapped the tie against his wrist once before removing it.
“Hush, your hair suits you” Kuroo said sweetly, pressing a gentle kiss to Kenma’s hair as he started fiddling with it. Kenma huffed again and looked away.
“So I’m stupid?” he’d meant it to sound like a tease, but the words sounded a bit too hurt to pull it off well. He flickered his eyes for a millisecond to see Kuroo’s expression before looking away again. It wasn’t enough time to figure out the multiple emotions that seemed to have surfaced in unison. After a slightly stale beat of silence, Kuroo settled on whining as he gently jabbed him in the ribs with two fingers.
“Kenmaaaa! You know what I meant! Jeez, way to make me sound like a bad boyfriend. Ugh” he paused in what was becoming a braid of some kind, though Kenma couldn’t really tell, to press a kiss against the side of his neck. Kenma flinched away as it turned into blowing a raspberry, now taking his turn to jab Kuroo in the ribs. Kuroo huffed some kind of wheeze-laugh and went back to braiding, the only sounds becoming the tall man humming to himself and the air conditioner thrumming quietly.
-----
A few minutes later, Kenma had pulled his phone out, playing a random idle game he’d recently downloaded when he felt a gentle tug on his hair. He looked up to see Kuroo grinning over his head in the mirror. He knew that smile, it was the ‘I’m very proud of myself and I’m not going to shut up about it until you tell me I did a good job because I have the emotional fortitude of a puppy’ look. At least, that’s what Kenma called it in the privacy of his mind, or when talking to Yaku. He stopped teasing Kuroo and focused on his reflection properly, he was now sporting a french braid that was actually, huh, he looked… Pretty. He shook that thought away and turned around, escaping his own surprised expression. Kuroo’s grin was now in his direct line of sight, troublesome.
“Eh? Eh? What do you think? I did pretty good huh? You should let me braid your hair all the time!” As he continued to poke and prod Kenma, who was now moving towards their bed, all he could do was mutter under his breath a response.
“Yeah, it looks great. Good job.” He knew that it was sometimes easier to give the praise straight away instead of dealing with the poking. Kuroo’s smile became so bright Kenma absentmindedly wondered where his sunglasses might be, as long arms wrapped around his middle. He found his feet leaving the ground to be swung around in a circle a few times before they were both flopped on the bed with very little elegance. The grip on his phone remained tight, practiced. After peppering Kenma’s face with a few kisses, Kuroo settled in with his left shoulder against Kenma’s back, facing the ceiling with unfocused eyes. ‘Vibing’ as he always described it to Kenma, was something he had been doing more and more of recently. Kenma remained on his side, turned away, focusing on his game, the music playing from his tinny phone speaker joining the thrum of the air conditioner as they laid on the bed.
-----
Fifteen or so minutes had passed, Kenma could tell Kuroo wasn’t asleep, his breathing wasn’t even or slow enough. He frowned slightly at his game, surely he was bored? He wasn’t even on his phone, he was just laying there against him. Now that he thought about it, a lot of the time they spent together was like this. Kenma would be doing something and Kuroo just, existed in the space with him. He felt the uncomfortable sensation of guilt start to worm it’s way through his stomach. Should he be focusing on Kuroo more? Being more actively engaged in their relationship? God, what if Kuroo thought he didn’t care about him?! Other couples always did stuff together, he’d seen it in the relationships his friends had, in movies, strangers on the street. Yet, here Kenma was, more like a houseplant that needed occasional watering instead of an actual partner that was there for him. Kuroo could definitely do better, there were so many people that he could spend time with who would actually put effort into their relationship. What if Kuroo left him? He didn’t want to think about it.
He’d been staring blankly at his screen, eyes unfocused for a few minutes when he heard a sleepy rumble from behind him.
“You’ve been on that menu music for a while there babe are you go- Kenma?” He’d cut himself off as his hand had touched Kenma’s side, feeling just how tense he was. “You okay Kitten?” Kenma became aware of the amount of tension he had been holding in his body and let out a shaky exhale. It didn’t help. Kuroo was now peering over at him, taking in his upset face with a worried furrow to his brow. Kenma made eye contact with that concern and felt like he’d been shot. Why was he so caring? He cared so much for him, always taking care of him and for what? He’d be totally justified giving up, moving on, seeing someone else. Kenma could feel his heart rate skyrocketing at the thought. Would he even be able to tell? If Kuroo stopped loving him, would he notice? As his mind began to spiral, Kuroo gently pried the phone out of his hand, putting it to the side and tried to pull Kenma towards him. The movement jolted Kenma, who nearly took out Kuroo’s chin as he sat up abruptly.
"If- If you stopped loving me would you tell me?" Kenma said with a rush, shoulders tense. Silence followed. Kenma could only take the quiet grating against his nerves for so long before he peaked up through his hair, to see Kuroo, eyes and mouth open wide, expression slowly shifting from shocked to distraught. Kenma grimaced and tried to look away again as Kuroo seemingly searched for a response, but was snapped back into place as the taller man moved. Two strong hands gripped his shoulders and forced him to face Kuroo directly.
“Kenma I- Babe what the fuck are you talking about? Where is this coming from?” Kuroo didn’t seem to notice himself shaking his boyfriend’s shoulders as he spoke, eyes wide, his tone uncharacteristically serious. Kenma started to stutter out some sort of response, but quickly gave up, burying his face in his palms, breathing shallowly. Kuroo startled at the motion, stopping the shaking, leaving them sitting together on the bed, the air conditioner thrumming. Kenma scrubbed his face as he picked his words, wary of the waves of worry his boyfriend was exuding like an aura. He sat back up slowly, avoiding Kuroo’s intense gaze.
“What I mean is… If you weren’t happy with me because of something I’m doing... or not doing, you’d tell me right?” He resolutely looked away, wringing his hands as Kuroo made several half-attempts at a sentence. A puff of air being blown against his eyes forced him to blink and look back, finding the face of a man trying his best to be calm and understanding, but very much screaming on the inside. Kuroo’s voice cracked slightly as he spoke.
“Kitten, can you explain what you mean a bit more? I don't… I don’t understand why you’d ask me that” he said, body tense, fingers fidgeting with the hood of Kenma’s jumper. Kenma felt sick for a moment, maybe they could just forget the whole conversation and he could leave. Escape the room that was somehow stifling, despite that quiet thrum. Kuroo’s grip on his hood seemed to tighten for a second, as if anticipating his plan. He wasn’t getting out of this.
“I just… Sometimes I feel like I’m not paying enough attention to you… Like… I’m supposed to be more… Present when we’re together” each word was like pulling teeth as Kenma’s hands moved up to grip around Kuroo’s wrists, seeking support lest he shatter into a thousand panicked pieces. “It’s like… in a game… I’m making you carry the party through every level, I’m deadweight on our team...I’m not affectionate with you like I should be… and I don’t like PDA. I hate going out to places” a hot prickling sensation behind his eyes didn’t bode well, but he pushed on. He’d been holding all these thoughts inside for so long, that now, with the lid off, they were overwhelming him in their attempts to escape. “I’m just such a shit boyfriend. You deserve so much better than me Kuro. I don’t want you to be stuck dating me if there’s someone out there who could care about you better than I can” Kenma sniffled slightly, trying to will tears to stay behind his eyes where they belonged. He felt stupid.
“Kenma” came a strangled response, his eyes snapped up to see Kuroo on the verge of tears, a vice like grip now on his boyfriend’s hoodie, shaking slightly under Kenma’s fingers. Kenma’s own swollen eyes were forgotten as he stared at his boyfriend’s distress in mild confusion. Why was he so upset? Kenma wasn’t worth the heartache etched into that expression. Kuroo tried to find his words without bursting into tears. “Kenma, I love you” he croaked out, like it was the most obvious thing in the world and he’d die if Kenma didn’t know it that very second. Kenma’s eyes blew wide as he froze.
“You- you do?” It came out as a harsh exhale, like he’d been punched in the sternum. The doubt in his quavering voice seemed to spur Kuroo into action. He released his tense grip to gently cradle Kenma’s face in his hands, Kenma’s own slack fingers still encircling his wrists.
“I love you so fucking much. I don’t care what people are supposed to do in relationships. I don’t care if other people would be more attentive. I don’t care if other people like PDA. I don’t care about any of that! I care about you! I care about you so fucking much Kitten, I feel like it’s going to set me on fire sometimes. I’m not carrying the team okay, we’re different classes that’s all. You’re my Player 1 Kenma, I fucking adore you” there were definitely tears streaming down Kuroo’s face at this point. “I love you! Not anybody else. I knew what you were like before we started dating. I’ve known you for years Kenma, and I’ve loved you for that long too” he gently brushed his thumbs across Kenma’s own tear-stained cheeks before pressing a soft kiss to his forehead. Kenma gave a quiet hiccuping-sob in response as Kuroo pulled him into a firm hug.
-----
They stayed in that embrace for an unknowable stretch of time, just breathing, definitely still crying, whispering nonsensical words. Kenma, with his face pressed into Kuroo’s neck, sniffled slightly as he whispered.
“I love you too Kuro” a slight jump showing he’d been heard. Kuroo mumbled something under his breath about cute kittens, pulling away from the embrace before responding.
“Babe, I’m supposed to be the cool one, and you’re going to make me cry!” Kenma rolled his eyes, reaching up to wipe away some of his idiot boyfriend’s tears.
“You’re already crying dumbass” he muttered, a slight smile making the teasing featherlight. Kuroo snorted, rolling his eyes as he spoke.
“Shush! Just come here!” he groused through a grin, grabbing Kenma’s face to pepper with light kisses, earning a startled laugh as a reward. Kuroo pulled back slightly to press their foreheads together, locking eyes. “I love you~ Kenma~” he sang obnoxiously.
“I take it back, you’re insufferable, you don’t deserve me” he attempted to curl his lip in disgust, but it just became another fragile smile. Kuroo eyed his expression carefully before responding.
“Hey, if I ever decide I hate how you stack the dishwasher or something? I’ll tell you okay” he poked at Kenma’s ribs, giving his underlying promise with a gentle smile and serious eyes. Kenma nodded awkwardly, responding in a stilted tone.
“But Kuro, what if I want to have the cups facing upwards to catch the soapy water?” Kenma had only meant to crack a dumb joke, but Kuroo’s face of utter disgust sent him into a fit of giggles. Kuroo’s horrified exclamations muffled as Kenma flopped backwards into the blankets. His grumbling boyfriend soon followed him. As his giggles finally subsided Kenma turned to face Kuroo, tugging at that ridiculous bedhead. Kuroo responded by flicking his nose and kissing his forehead again.
Kenma yawned, eyes heavy with exhaustion from such an emotional rollercoaster. His boyfriend smiled sweetly at him in response. Kuroo reached out to pull the covers across them, protectively wrapping himself around Kenma as he shielded them both from the cold of the air conditioner.
Hey just popping out of my cave to post this. Enjoy!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dazzling light.
The annual Masquerade of the small kingdom of Avonkeld was in full swing. Couples were swirling around the large, ostentatious ballroom. The glossy, marble floor obscured by the large skirts and elaborate costumes of the guests. Prince James gave a heavy sigh as he looked around at all the strange creatures and characters. The anonymity of the ball was both a blessing and a curse.
On the one hand he could stand here in his intricately embroidered fox costume, mask obscuring his features to the general populous and finally get to spend one night not having to be the Crown Prince James of Avonkeld.
Yet on the other hand as he looked around at the veritable flock of birds of paradise in human form, he couldn’t recognise a single friend with whom to pass the time. Another sigh passed his lips, earning an eye roll from his sole, constant companion. The broad shoulders and piercing gaze of his bodyguard, Hektor, not even remotely hidden by the blacks and dark greys of his wolf costume. James took a step closer to him, a knowing smile on his face as he spoke quietly to the man.
“Not enjoying yourself, my good wolf? I thought you’d like the costume I picked for you” Hektor snorted in response, taking another sweeping gaze of the room before focusing back on his charge.
“It’s a lot harder to keep you safe when I can’t even tell who we’re surrounded by, Your Highness” James nodded thoughtfully, though the glint in his golden eyes made Hektor feel uneasy.
“Well if that’s the case, shall we stay on the move then?” Hektor’s eyebrows furrowed behind his mask as the prince dipped into a bow, one hand extended towards him, “Would you care to dance Hektor?” he asked with a wink. Hektor stiffened, but slowly accepted the offered hand.
“Your Highness, I don’t really think this is appropriate…” James smiled as he pulled his companion towards the dancefloor for the next song.
“Relax Hektor, no one knows who we are, and besides you said you wanted to keep me safe right? What better way than with me in your arms?” he teased as Hektor pulled him closer, leading the dance. The narrow gap between them making his heart flutter.
“Your Highn-” he cut himself off with a look from the prince “Jem we can’t keep doing this. If anyone were to find out... “ the despairing glance James gave him, causing his words to peter out. James’ eyes flicked away before meeting his again.
“I know Hektor, trust me I know, but I also know how I feel about you” his gaze firm as Hektor pulled him closer in the dance. “You said it yourself, love doesn’t let you decide these things” James’ fingers tightened around the leathery, gloved grip of Hektor’s hand on his. Hektor gave him his first smile of the evening.
“Using my own words against me, you’re lucky I still love you” he whispered conspiratorially against the shell of James’ ear, earning a flushed smile in return.
Hey so you asked for Haikyuu stuff to practice writing with. I was wondering if you had some soft Kuroo headcanons???
Hello anon! This has been sitting in here for a while I’m so sorry sdfahlkasdf. God, I love Kuroo so much.
This man? A cuddle monster. As soon as he’s comfortable enough with somebody (more realistically, when someone is willing to let him lay all over them) he’s just a koala. A problem considering how tall he is but that doesn’t matter to him.
Kenma accepted this years ago as a part of their dynamic to the point where it’s common to find Kenma sitting in Kuroo’s lap (probably playing on a handheld because of course, it’s Kenma) and Kuroo has like an arm around his waist to hold him in place while he uses his other hand to write notes, eat, use his phone, whatever.
(Side note, people vibing in the same space while doing different activities is GOOD SHIT and that’s the kind of casual intimacy I fucking live for platonic or otherwise and so does Kuroo because I said so)
I think Kuroo will just like, touch people really casually? He has big tactile energy. A hand on the shoulder, ruffling someone’s hair etc.
If someone isn’t super comfy with touch though he’ll bippity boppity back the fuck up real quick with no questions asked, because he’s a gentleman and also not an asshole.
He likes people playing with his hair, like yes, he is aware it’s wild, no there’s no way to fix this, why yes, it is very soft, go ahead. He has accepted people want to try to understand how it defies gravity and that usually means at least a couple fingers shoved in his hair.
Playing with his hair makes him lowkey melt tho fr.
Kuroo always likes to check in with his team when they’re feeling down about something, he doesn’t make a big deal out of it, it’s just an extra snack at practice pressed into their hand with no room for refusal, him offering to walk people home and playing it off as him being spontaneous and a “kind person” but it’s just his way of silently supporting them and letting them know he’s there to listen if they want.
God what a guy.
When Kuroo gets tired in training he’ll flop onto the nearest shorter person and just use their head as a headrest with his arms slung over their shoulders, forcing them to hold up his weight. This never goes well, because if it’s Kenma he’ll wiggle out from underneath him leaving Kuroo to fall onto the floor and if it’s Yaku he’s going to start kicking Kuroo who will wake up very quickly to get out of range.
Anyway, I’m a Kuroo simp on a main, he is unironically my favourite character in the whole show. I’m always down for writing Kuroo or honestly just talking about him ya’ll so hmu.
My requests are currently open and I have a Ko-fi if you want to jump the queue! Thank ya’ll for your support! It really means a lot!
I’m so sorry, I’ll try to be better from now on. I promise.
I’ll do anything just… Please... Don’t leave me.
...
I get it.
I understand why you’d want to replace me. I’m a figurine you got at a discount because it’s defective. At first, you thought the botched paint job was endearing, but now it makes your eye twitch every time you look at me.
There’s no expression in my voice when I talk, it unnerves you, it’s always unnerved people. It makes me seem cold, toneless. I am an untuned cello someone left in your grandfather’s attic - one that you just discovered this summer afternoon. You tried to play it, to get a ringing note, but all you got is a discordant mess.
My face is as emotive as a brick wall, though at least a brick wall can support you. Smiling is a foreign concept here, good luck getting it through customs. The land that is my head doesn’t take kindly to change.
I stare for an uncomfortably long time, but avoid eye contact and I know you hate it. My dead eyes that you say reflect in the dark like glass. The feeling of me watching you causes shivers, but I can’t help it. You’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.
Touching you makes my skin burn. I flinched every time. If it was anyone else I’d stay far away, but I was fine with the pain if it was you. The white-hot ice shards piercings my skin at what should have been a feather-light touch. I’d set myself on fire if it meant I could bask in the warmth that is your very presence.
My fixation started to worry you, worry your friends. I’m obsessive with my interests, and you are the definition of interesting. You said you needed space, but to me, you’re the centre of the universe. You’re a supernova, an eclipse. I don't care if I go blind, I’d want you to be the last thing I ever saw.
You’ve always said I don't express my feelings, that I should use my words better. I struggle to speak, make my tongue work between my teeth in a motion that could make an intelligible string of endearments. I feel like I am screaming, like I cannot breathe - drowning in the ocean that is my feelings for you.
I can’t stop you.
I would never stop you from doing what you want, no matter how much I might rage when the world becomes all too much on my easily-frayed senses. It’s never at you. If you want to be with someone else, I will not stop you.
If you are happy, then that’s the silver lining. My wants and needs mean nothing to me, as long as you are happy.
I’m sorry I could never say it to your face, but...
Hey yall so this is my new sideblog for writing so people don’t have to witness the mess that is my main blog just to see the random stuff I write. I’ll be reblogging my old stuff onto here first before I get started into some of the new requests I have. Check out the rules/faq for more info on what I’ll write. Anything else just send me an ask :)
Hey all if you want to see previews of what I’m working on I post small snippet previews over on my Ko-fi! They’re free to see btw so anyone can go take a little look to see what’s coming up :)
Please be specific about what characters you want and whether you want headcanons or a one-shot/writing prompt etc.
I can’t guarantee you any particular word count, it’s up to how well I connect with the prompt and what I come up with. Whether that’s 400 words or 4000 I have no idea until I start plotting out my ideas.
Please only 4-5 characters max in a headcanon request or I’ll perish.
I’ll write for ships as well as character x reader.
I’m going to write readers as gender-neutral unless you specify otherwise.
I can’t guarantee you any timeframe, I’m a fulltime uni student with a part-time job. Free time isn’t something I have. a lot of.
I haven’t written NSFW in like 3 years, but I’m down to give it another go, practice makes perfect I guess.
However, I won’t write NSFW for characters that are minors. I’m a 20 year old guy, that’s YIKES.
Please be polite. This is a hobby, not my job.
No weird shit. Incest, massive age gaps, pedophilia, abuse, rape any of that nasty stuff.
Any open prompt lists I’m using are under #open prompt list
Support in the way of donations via my Ko-fi is appreciated and will put your request at the top of the list!
I also have an Ao3 account where I post non-reader fanfiction.
Sorry I went ghost for a little, the end of my university semester assessments were highkey taking up all my brain juice. I’m back now and ready to write whatever ya’ll want!
Also, I have a Ko-fi now if you want to support me. Link is in my Requests/FAQ.
if you do, your request will jump to the top of the list and I can give you a preview of it for any changes or feedback before I post it if you want.
