stay calm and drink tea

Im here 'cause my friends are persistent. Also, they decided that I need tumblr in my life.

[luke-thompsons]

#of course they are friends

[darlinglittlemeg]

Idk if this has been done yet-

[anon-arte]

say what you want about penelope but i think we should commend her for behaving pretty normally about her crush on colin. when colin got a crush on penelope he immediately descended into madness

[acanoeandlifejackets]

Colin: men are simple creatures, just bat your eyes and wave your fan.

Penelope: *bats her eyes and waves her fan*

Colin (sweating): Fuck she’s good.

[beguilingcorpse]

actually hilarious that colin bridgerton returned to london absolutely determined to be in his slut era. he said if there is one thing i am it is a whore. and then one (1) kiss with penelope later he was like neverMIND i am a MARRIED MAN i am MONOGAMOUS life is about LIFELONG PARTNERSHIP ACTUALLY

[crispyliza]

Fanfiction in the late 2000s-early 2010s was wild bc you'd find a beautifully written story with the most compelling heart-wrenching plot you've ever seen and the author's note would be like:

Author with a username like ~SasukesWaifuxD~ : Ohayo gozaimasu! ↖(^▽^)↗, I'm sowwy it took me so long to update (๑•́_•̀๑)

tsundere twink from their fic : It was about damn time you idiot (눈‸눈)

~SasukesWaifuxD~ : Hey now! It's not my fault the plot bunnies kept wunning away fwom me (╥﹏╥)

tsundere twink: W-watever, it's not like I missed you or anything (💢,,>﹏<,,) b-baka!

[chikhaibardocowboy]

I suppose that is what I like.

[fiumedivita]

"For God's sake, Penelope Featherington, are you going to marry me or not?"

Colin, love, she had no idea you had any feelings for her until 10 minutes ago and you literally spent that time trying to eat her titties while your fingers were exploring the unseen, give her a second

[my-drama-heart2406]

Violet Bridgerton spent the first two seasons telling her children who was good for them, dragging them, reluctantly, to balls and events and parties. And she saw that her normal methods were clearly not working and it would only result in a very long process of her children not listening to her, going after someone else, doing the complete opposite of what they should, causing a scandal and then finally going after the very same person who, she had told is right for them.

I love that she evolved her methods and reached the conclusion that the only way to make her children listen to her is by gaslighting them.

So instead of telling Colin, "You know, I think Penelope Featherington is right for you". She told him, "Oh you're helping your friend get a husband? That's wonderful darling." "Oh you don't want to come to the ball? That's completely fine. It's just a shame that you won't get to see Penelope Featherington get proposed tonight, after all the hard work you did to help her. But what can you do if you're not feeling well, right?"

😅

[clevercloudpoetry]

Penelope: One kiss, it would not mean anything.

Inner Colin after the kiss:

[lanaskino]

Many people know “Groundhog Day” - a 1993 film starring Bill Murray. The plot is well known: TV meteorologist Phil travels to a small town to cover grounhog Phil’s traditional prediction of winter.

He falls into a strange time loop and wakes up over and over again on the same day. So why does the hero manage to wake up at the end the next day? Is it about the healing power of love?

I think not.

Phil’s character goes through 10 different behavioral stages that allow him to accept Death and Life, and this work on himself ensures him a happy ending.

Keep reading

[ziggy-solarecreator]

Proper boundaries

[huttslut]

shoutout to the lord of the rings lighting directors. bold move to let the audience see what's going on in nighttime scenes. i miss that.

[gawayne]

was violently compelled to do this

[plaidos]

i hate this post because the original unedited tweet was made by my girlfriend and she fucking loves the show bbc merlin so fucking much. but that’s not the bit i hate, the bit i hate is that the original tweet is about how she outed me as from a protestant family to her irish catholic grandmother to distract from us being lesbians and it’s TRUE she DID DO THIS and also i SHOWED HER THIS EDIT AND SHE LOVES IT 🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🥰🥰🥰🥰🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬💘💘

[chronophobica]

me, copy pasting the same joke on tumblr, 3 discord servers, 2 dms, and a group chat: I am doing amazing. I am doing fantastic. I am going to get a good grade in funny, which is both normal to want and possible to achieve,

[chronophobica]

shaking and crying

[pathos-logical]

[ID: A reply by @lucifer-just-needs-a-hug that reads: "Did you copy and paste this op." End ID]

[funnytwittertweets]

[shanastoryteller]

I worked at a McDonald's as a cashier in high school and it was during a time when they changed their POS system (point of sale, not piece of shit) so everything was now in a slightly different, less logical place, but I was working 20ish hours a week so I picked it up really quickly

Anyway I was out with my friend in the next town over and we went to a McDonald's because she really wanted an ice tea and we go through the drive through. The man greets us out of the little speaker and asks for our order and she says "Hi! Could I get a large sweet ice tea please?"

Silence.

Longer silence.

And I knew in my heart what was happening.

So I leaned over and said, "It's on page two of drinks, under juice, then the third one down."

Another much shorter silence.

Then:

"What the - how the hell did... Uh. I mean. Thank you?"

And it's been literally ten years but I'm still riding the high from that.

[timeclonemike]

Ninety percent of most magic consists of knowing one extra fact.

-Terry Pratchett