a court of coffee and lexapro

chaotic rage writer, mother of plants & lover of fries🪴she/her (24)🪴married to vixxy Masterlist

[teelagurl558]

***Please note: I do not take requests!

Hi there! I’m Teela. Here you’ll find the library catalog for all the things I write. Take a look around! Be aware a lot of this content contains mature language and themes. Don’t hesitate to slip a question or comment into the ask box and the librarian will be with you shortly. :)

***I have a Wattpad account with some of my fics posted under the same username. I do not give rights for others (minus @darksideofmyshallow in specific cases of dual-authorship) to repost my work in any form or to use it in AI of any form.

Adventures of my OC’s

Ouran High School Host Club

Outer Banks

Supernatural

The Sandman

The Dragon (ATLA, Zuko x R)

Loyalty (Seven Deadly Sins, Gloxinia x Fairy!R)

Heart Ties (The Arcana, Julian x MC/R)

Your Brother Gave It To Me (Uncharted Movie, Sam Drake x R)

[livelaughlok1]

her <3

[teelagurl558]

happy pride to her specifically

[motherblackcap]

I heard it was that time of year again.

[teelagurl558]

@fuckleydiaz its us happy gay month

[diphowell]

Dan and Phil: Tomodachi (real) Life

[phanpill]

Sweethearts (6068 day)

[azaablue]

the best fanfiction you've ever read was written by a woman in her 40s before she made dinner for her kids. it was written by a teenager after school when they should've been studying for a history test. and a barista came up with the idea while they cleaned the espresso machine and busser fact-checked it on their break and the post-doc edited between writing grant proposals and the nurse apologized for typos in the notes after a long shift and behind every drabble and one-shot and multi-chapter fic there is a person with a wonderful and interesting and chaotic life and it is such a privilege that we get to be apart of it because they decided to do this thing we all share, for fun.

[con-alas-de-angeles]

“I walk through centuries like they were my own garden.”

[teelagurl558]

Dearest Wife of Mine~

I know birthdays aren't your favorite these days, but I don't often get days fully dedicated to appreciating you. I don't often feel like I know how to show the affection and the value I have for you, because it is so truly immense.

29 years ago the stars aligned somehow and a little agent of chaos sprouted forth. Nearly 5 years ago, the higher powers of the internet crossed our paths. To this day, all my achievements, all the little miracles in my life, that is the miracle I am most grateful for.

I love being here through the growth and healing and change, I love the laughter, I love the never ending conversations, I love the "peer review diagnoses" that I could not escape if I tried. I love knowing that I will be here to listen to you scream about sportsball, and you will be here to listen to me scream about the star whores, and that one day we will laugh and watch our kids yell at each other about new silly antics, forever.

Legal or not, you are the best wife I could ever ask for and more than I could've dreamed of in a best friend. And no matter how you feel about birthdays, I'm glad there's a national holiday dedicated to celebrating my better half.

Here's to you--my soulmate, and the sillier, softer, sunshine half to all the gay ships we keep collecting and lovingly sharing together. Thank you for putting up with my diet rafe cameron/dean winchester grumpy ass for this long.

@spinningintheshadows Thank you for still being here. You make every day brighter just by being in it.

[teelagurl558]

GOOD MORROW MY BITCHES I HAVE AN ANNOUNCEMENT

it is once again the one day a year i get to appreciate my wife loudly and proudly (she said, yknow, like a lesbian) and nothing else matters because thats my fucking WIFE

I decided to reblog last year’s post with this years message because I was a lot better with words right about then. I was very deeply connected with my emotions and feeling just about everything, and @fuckleydiaz you deserve a reminder that all those things i said are true. Even if we’ve both been so busy lately, and we’ve been a little lost, and I am not the best at being a dramatic gay poet.

We’ve been through a lot in the last year. Hell, its been a lot since we met, but this year you followed my footsteps and moved across the country. You took a really powerful step to improve your life and its done wonders for you, and im so glad to have witnessed it. We’ve grown, we’ve laughed, we’ve cried. We’ve gotten new jobs and lost old ones, we’ve found new books and characters to scream over, we’ve made new friends and we’ve lost one very dear to us. And through everything, we’ve had eachother.

I don’t care where life takes us. If you are still by my side, even in whatever capacity we have the spoons for at the moment? I can handle it. And I’m incredibly grateful to see you reach your 30s when I know that wasn’t always a certain future. (However if you ever scare me like that again I will do worse than unsupervised Phil Lester i swear to Chuck.)

Happy birthday my love. The Huddy to my Connor and also somehow the Shane to my Ilya, I wish you all the best. Thank you for filling my life with unconditional love and whimsy and teaching me that dark humor is always the best way to cope🖤

here are some pics of our child muah muah

[rosemehdee]

hurting ur friend with a really sad headcanon like 

[teelagurl558]

@fuckleydiaz pulling up in the group chat with me and our innocent child

[mawofthemagnetar]

What do you mean “chat” is now referring to ChatGPT and not twitch chat? What? What? What the fuck? No?

When I address chat I am speaking to a presumed Greek chorus of real human people shitposting on their lunch break, not a machine that devours lakes to covert electricity into slop.

[galahadwilder]

The Joker’s violent attention-comedy bullshit would 100% just not work if his main opponent was John Constantine. Both because John is funnier than he is and just does NOT care. Joker would be bouncing around like “look at me, I’m so EEEEVILLLL” and John’s just bored because this isn’t even in the top ten evil things he’s seen this morning

[galahadwilder]

Joker: hahaha, I’ve POISONED THE RESERVOIR

John, casually purifying it by dropping a charm no bigger than his pinkie into the water and then walking away: call me again when you’ve turned an orphanage into inside-out land sharks or something

Joker: *splutters*

[galahadwilder]

Joker: you’re TOO LATE, Hellblazer! Now you have to choose between rescuing this civilian… or your PARTNER! Hahahahaha!

John, who specifically chose this partner because he was a serial killer and therefore expendable, and was also planning to feed him to Dagon tomorrow anyway: aw thanks mate, you’ve saved me an arseload of trouble

Joker: …

Joker: what the fuck is wrong with you

[galahadwilder]

Joker: I am going to murder your ONE TRUE LOVE! AHAHAHAHA

John: haha I’m dating King Shark so good bloody luck

Joker: WHAT THE FUCK AAAAUGH NEW PLAN NEW PLAN

[lifesmeaning-42]

The sequel to this:

[galahadwilder]

…I completely forgot I made that post

[dlasta]

[betaphannie]

guys what does this say i have no clue

[betaphannie]

@abba-enthusiast

[sword-and-stars]

[tesb]

The Force will be with you, always. HAPPY STAR WARS DAY!

[dnp-as-posts]

[estiehowells]

This is sending me because the way Phil just goes “Dan, you’re not doing Diana…” implies that this is a regular occurrence

[red-string-of-phate]

this is now lost media

you know i saved this shit you're welcome

[scleroticstatue]

Yes, that is my circus, and, yes, those are my monkeys, but I am not on shift yet.

[the-beard-of-edward-teach]

[teelagurl558]

@microplasticsubmarine watching me and vix cause problems