Texts From Thorin's Company @textsfromthorinscompany - Tumblr Blog

back on pause for a bit lads, my external hard drive that i have all of my screenshots/etc on got fucked up and now ive gotta send her off for data recovery

(623):

I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about

#623 #gandalf #dwalin #thorin

(434):

Whats a little breast milk between friends?

#434 #gollum

(404):

I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes

#404 #celebrimbor #talion #wraithshipping #talibrimbor

(941):

Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head

#941 #bilbo #dwalin #dwilbo

(763):

Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.

#763 #queen marwen

(562):

I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.

#562 #azog

(310):

My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!

#310 #bilbo

(607):

Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.

#607 #talion #torvin

(307):

Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.

#307 #bard #tauriel

(870):

Let the record show that I hate your ass.

#870 #thorin #thranduil

(316):

Consume your own penis you ugly freak.

#316 #celebrimbor #sauron

(786):

You’re not his type

(305):

I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type

#786 #305 #thorin #fili

(510):

Are you hungover?

(562):

No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.

#510 #562 #thorin #bilbo

(469):

I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.

#469 #talion

(603):

honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself

#603 #smaug

(618):

I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers

#618 #bard #the company

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