cup of bastard soup

shay, he/him. 40+. 🌈 nsfw sometimes. minors DNI. pfp by eiscue.bsky.social follows from @oh-its-shay bsky: thatsadorbsyo.bsky.social

[sword-wielding-sapphic]

Black Sails & The Onion headlines (text post memes 12/?)

[kuttithevangu]

the new fantasy genre, popehunk, encompasses all books in which historical figures responsible for real atrocities are presented as sexy and potentially suffering from a cute lil' anxiety disorder

[thedeliaishere]

theistic crystal shop: these crystals will align your chakras and induce spiritual healing

materialist crystal shop: these crystals will make you feel better because they're a cool part of nature and pretty to look at :)

agnostic crystal shop: no one knows why the crystals are good.

[kafkaesquegf]

they should invent a high ponytail that doesn’t give me a headache and they should invent a low ponytail that doesn’t make me look like a miller’s apprentice going off to enlist in the continental army

[pjharvey]

we have to start running a massive PSA campaign to young gay people so everyone understands there is a difference between being a dom and being a top and between being a sub and being a bottom. and also that sometimes you are neither a sub nor a bottom and you're just like shy. we need to be handing out flyers we need ads at every train station spreading the word

[destructionfanq]

we all know that beinq introduced as "???" with a black silhouette as sprite feels qood as fuck BUT. you must imaqine beinq introduced as "!?"

[cyphir-spacerobot]

Victor Frankenstein after achieving the impossible and building a fucking person from scraps of the dead: Oh god, ew, ew it's ugly! Yucky! Yucky! Gross! Ew! Ew! Yucky! Yucky! Gross! Ew!

[koiagain]

[balaclava-trismegistus]

You have to pee in the shower to get into heaven

[doomtemparts]

one of my friends in a discord server was talking about how they were nervous about their first scheduled acupuncture appointment. another friend offered to do a tarot reading for them. sent this picture.

[podcastwizard]

my most toxic trait is i fucking love work gossip. i play neutral not to be the bigger person or take the high road but to hear slander and hearsay from every side. two coworkers complained about each other to me in the same afternoon and i nearly blacked out from the rush

[punished-venom-solitair-e]

everyone post your biggest hear me outs my friend just showed me two conventionally attractive white men in a row i need to teach him what a real hear me out is

[gardenofeden5457]

.world's largest excavator- nay, world's largest vehicle- the bagger 288

.also, scale reference! just the wheel is 70 feet in diameter

[ceruinus]

'here's a real hear me out' >>posts world's most conventionally attractive piece of machinery

[ballwizard]

meows loud as fuck shattering all glass within 3 miles no survivors

[3000s]

Yes, your dentist can absolutely tell if you masturbated at home before your appointment. And in fact, a shower and change of clothes does little to hide this. The best step forward is to apologize to your dentist for masturbating.

[3000s]

- mockup of results from my new search engine called "Google OCD"

[vitariesocks]

just received the best text message I’ve ever had. from my mom

[vitariesocks]

2 pics. no caption

[omnia-mors-aequat-nstrwa]

“Peace Bells” — Andreas Gering (1916)

[csny]

[thesituation]

[redstonedust]

i think being proud of where you come from is one of those things that becomes fun the more specific you get. like "proud to be english" bad rancid vibes. makes you sound like the kind of person who rants about immigrants. "proud to be from yorkshire" better vibes. i cannot deny the yorkshire cultural heritage. "proud to be from pocklington" absolutely fucking hilarious please never let anybody kill your pocklington pride.

[redstonedust]

i love the USA: weird vibes. dont trust that.

i love muskegon michigan: you are experiencing a kind of personal joy that i can and will not take from you

[negativesanchez]