Let.
Me.
Out.
- @jesterhaj
Aren’t you already ?
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@the-arohaj
Let.
Me.
Out.
- @jesterhaj
Aren’t you already ?
> now free, Jesterhaj swims around, and ends up finding Clownhaj's circus.
Oh, no. No. No. No. No. FUCK no.
> with anger in their eyes, they enter the (currently empty) circus.
DARIUS, YOU [????] [???????]!!
> for a while, they stay within the empty circus, shouting and making a mess, trying to find the Clownhaj.
Omg Jester hi!!! What are you doing here :3 it's been a while since I've seen you!
> the jester stops dead in their tracks, staring at Smahaj for a long minute.
What the hell are you doing here, stultus?
> the last word seems to be an insult.
Oh so close, you got the first letter right. I'm Smahaj, I don't know who that Stultus is, sorry :/
And for what I'm doing here, well I heard some noise so I was wondering what Clown was up to! So I came to check. Is this like... A bad time? I can come back later if you want
I was calling you an idiot.
> they sigh and roll their eyes
No, it's fine. I can't find that clown anywhere anyways.
Oh
Ok
Why are you looking for them?
To banish them from this world, too.
> Jesterhaj growls.
I can assure you, no matter how friendly or caring they may seem... That clown will turn on you the moment he can. He'll hurt everyone you care about and more. Cause as much damage as he can...
> their eyes glow a faint purple
Ye that ain’t happening hi smahaj hi jesterhaj please explain
Hello everyone I'm also here now
Shit. Uh, ask Blodhaj!
> they teleport away, disappearing instantly.
@blodhaj please explain
~ vwooshhhh
Me? I have no idea what your talking about. It's probably some imposter, considering jester doesn't seem like the kind to run away. Did you check your void that had/has them in it?
Did you really think I’d be fooled by a clone? What could have possibly compelled you to let jesterhaj escape?
First of all, I stand by the fact that the one out here is the clone. Secondly, if I did do the thing you're accusing me of, I would not have to tell you, since whatever authority you think you have, doesn't apply to someone of my position.
And what position is that
The guardian, calamity mitigator, and territorial authority of this planet, since the first drop of water touched it's surface.
And how does freeing the being who attempted to kill the hajar mitigate calamity exactly?
Firstly, my presence alone mitigates calamity in my territory, earthquakes that destroyed cites would've split the planet, wildfires that burned down forests would have ignited the atmosphere, volcanos that destroyed cities would've covered the planet's sky in an ashy night for decades.
But that isn't the point. If I released that jester, it would've been because maybe I'm thinking of a bigger picture than simply damning enemies to an eternal void. Either way, considering the jester that's running around, fake or not, is running away from you meaning they'll be too scared to cause real trouble.
Speaking of which, is that what you do to all your problems? Banish them instead of dealing with them?
Hmmmm…. That is actually a good point
fine, Blodhaj, I will consider it. For now, I will allow jesterhaj’s freedom. Know, however, that I will be watching them.
Arohaj disappears
> now free, Jesterhaj swims around, and ends up finding Clownhaj's circus.
Oh, no. No. No. No. No. FUCK no.
> with anger in their eyes, they enter the (currently empty) circus.
DARIUS, YOU [????] [???????]!!
> for a while, they stay within the empty circus, shouting and making a mess, trying to find the Clownhaj.
Omg Jester hi!!! What are you doing here :3 it's been a while since I've seen you!
> the jester stops dead in their tracks, staring at Smahaj for a long minute.
What the hell are you doing here, stultus?
> the last word seems to be an insult.
Oh so close, you got the first letter right. I'm Smahaj, I don't know who that Stultus is, sorry :/
And for what I'm doing here, well I heard some noise so I was wondering what Clown was up to! So I came to check. Is this like... A bad time? I can come back later if you want
I was calling you an idiot.
> they sigh and roll their eyes
No, it's fine. I can't find that clown anywhere anyways.
Oh
Ok
Why are you looking for them?
To banish them from this world, too.
> Jesterhaj growls.
I can assure you, no matter how friendly or caring they may seem... That clown will turn on you the moment he can. He'll hurt everyone you care about and more. Cause as much damage as he can...
> their eyes glow a faint purple
Ye that ain’t happening hi smahaj hi jesterhaj please explain
Hello everyone I'm also here now
Shit. Uh, ask Blodhaj!
> they teleport away, disappearing instantly.
@blodhaj please explain
~ vwooshhhh
Me? I have no idea what your talking about. It's probably some imposter, considering jester doesn't seem like the kind to run away. Did you check your void that had/has them in it?
Did you really think I’d be fooled by a clone? What could have possibly compelled you to let jesterhaj escape?
First of all, I stand by the fact that the one out here is the clone. Secondly, if I did do the thing you're accusing me of, I would not have to tell you, since whatever authority you think you have, doesn't apply to someone of my position.
And what position is that
The guardian, calamity mitigator, and territorial authority of this planet, since the first drop of water touched it's surface.
And how does freeing the being who attempted to kill the hajar mitigate calamity exactly?
> now free, Jesterhaj swims around, and ends up finding Clownhaj's circus.
Oh, no. No. No. No. No. FUCK no.
> with anger in their eyes, they enter the (currently empty) circus.
DARIUS, YOU [????] [???????]!!
> for a while, they stay within the empty circus, shouting and making a mess, trying to find the Clownhaj.
Omg Jester hi!!! What are you doing here :3 it's been a while since I've seen you!
> the jester stops dead in their tracks, staring at Smahaj for a long minute.
What the hell are you doing here, stultus?
> the last word seems to be an insult.
Oh so close, you got the first letter right. I'm Smahaj, I don't know who that Stultus is, sorry :/
And for what I'm doing here, well I heard some noise so I was wondering what Clown was up to! So I came to check. Is this like... A bad time? I can come back later if you want
I was calling you an idiot.
> they sigh and roll their eyes
No, it's fine. I can't find that clown anywhere anyways.
Oh
Ok
Why are you looking for them?
To banish them from this world, too.
> Jesterhaj growls.
I can assure you, no matter how friendly or caring they may seem... That clown will turn on you the moment he can. He'll hurt everyone you care about and more. Cause as much damage as he can...
> their eyes glow a faint purple
Ye that ain’t happening hi smahaj hi jesterhaj please explain
Hello everyone I'm also here now
Shit. Uh, ask Blodhaj!
> they teleport away, disappearing instantly.
@blodhaj please explain
~ vwooshhhh
Me? I have no idea what your talking about. It's probably some imposter, considering jester doesn't seem like the kind to run away. Did you check your void that had/has them in it?
Did you really think I’d be fooled by a clone? What could have possibly compelled you to let jesterhaj escape?
First of all, I stand by the fact that the one out here is the clone. Secondly, if I did do the thing you're accusing me of, I would not have to tell you, since whatever authority you think you have, doesn't apply to someone of my position.
And what position is that
> now free, Jesterhaj swims around, and ends up finding Clownhaj's circus.
Oh, no. No. No. No. No. FUCK no.
> with anger in their eyes, they enter the (currently empty) circus.
DARIUS, YOU [????] [???????]!!
> for a while, they stay within the empty circus, shouting and making a mess, trying to find the Clownhaj.
Omg Jester hi!!! What are you doing here :3 it's been a while since I've seen you!
> the jester stops dead in their tracks, staring at Smahaj for a long minute.
What the hell are you doing here, stultus?
> the last word seems to be an insult.
Oh so close, you got the first letter right. I'm Smahaj, I don't know who that Stultus is, sorry :/
And for what I'm doing here, well I heard some noise so I was wondering what Clown was up to! So I came to check. Is this like... A bad time? I can come back later if you want
I was calling you an idiot.
> they sigh and roll their eyes
No, it's fine. I can't find that clown anywhere anyways.
Oh
Ok
Why are you looking for them?
To banish them from this world, too.
> Jesterhaj growls.
I can assure you, no matter how friendly or caring they may seem... That clown will turn on you the moment he can. He'll hurt everyone you care about and more. Cause as much damage as he can...
> their eyes glow a faint purple
Ye that ain’t happening hi smahaj hi jesterhaj please explain
Hello everyone I'm also here now
Shit. Uh, ask Blodhaj!
> they teleport away, disappearing instantly.
@blodhaj please explain
~ vwooshhhh
Me? I have no idea what your talking about. It's probably some imposter, considering jester doesn't seem like the kind to run away. Did you check your void that had/has them in it?
Did you really think I’d be fooled by a clone? What could have possibly compelled you to let jesterhaj escape?
> now free, Jesterhaj swims around, and ends up finding Clownhaj's circus.
Oh, no. No. No. No. No. FUCK no.
> with anger in their eyes, they enter the (currently empty) circus.
DARIUS, YOU [????] [???????]!!
> for a while, they stay within the empty circus, shouting and making a mess, trying to find the Clownhaj.
Omg Jester hi!!! What are you doing here :3 it's been a while since I've seen you!
> the jester stops dead in their tracks, staring at Smahaj for a long minute.
What the hell are you doing here, stultus?
> the last word seems to be an insult.
Oh so close, you got the first letter right. I'm Smahaj, I don't know who that Stultus is, sorry :/
And for what I'm doing here, well I heard some noise so I was wondering what Clown was up to! So I came to check. Is this like... A bad time? I can come back later if you want
I was calling you an idiot.
> they sigh and roll their eyes
No, it's fine. I can't find that clown anywhere anyways.
Oh
Ok
Why are you looking for them?
To banish them from this world, too.
> Jesterhaj growls.
I can assure you, no matter how friendly or caring they may seem... That clown will turn on you the moment he can. He'll hurt everyone you care about and more. Cause as much damage as he can...
> their eyes glow a faint purple
Ye that ain’t happening hi smahaj hi jesterhaj please explain
Hello everyone I'm also here now
Shit. Uh, ask Blodhaj!
> they teleport away, disappearing instantly.
@blodhaj please explain
Blahaj wishes you a Happy Jaws 50th Anniversary
> now free, Jesterhaj swims around, and ends up finding Clownhaj's circus.
Oh, no. No. No. No. No. FUCK no.
> with anger in their eyes, they enter the (currently empty) circus.
DARIUS, YOU [????] [???????]!!
> for a while, they stay within the empty circus, shouting and making a mess, trying to find the Clownhaj.
Omg Jester hi!!! What are you doing here :3 it's been a while since I've seen you!
> the jester stops dead in their tracks, staring at Smahaj for a long minute.
What the hell are you doing here, stultus?
> the last word seems to be an insult.
Oh so close, you got the first letter right. I'm Smahaj, I don't know who that Stultus is, sorry :/
And for what I'm doing here, well I heard some noise so I was wondering what Clown was up to! So I came to check. Is this like... A bad time? I can come back later if you want
I was calling you an idiot.
> they sigh and roll their eyes
No, it's fine. I can't find that clown anywhere anyways.
Oh
Ok
Why are you looking for them?
To banish them from this world, too.
> Jesterhaj growls.
I can assure you, no matter how friendly or caring they may seem... That clown will turn on you the moment he can. He'll hurt everyone you care about and more. Cause as much damage as he can...
> their eyes glow a faint purple
Ye that ain’t happening hi smahaj hi jesterhaj please explain
> You hear an echoing inside your mind
Hello Jester, I've put up an illusion of you standing still, would you like to talk? negotiate perhaps?
- @blodhaj
> the jester's fins perk up.
Blodhaj? Get the hell out of my brain!
> they then stop and consider
Can you get me out of here? If not, then we have nothing to talk about.
I may have a way… But first, what is your actual name, then I'll tell you mine. Let's cut through the red tape.
> this seems to slightly anger the shark
Why, you some kind of fae? There's no way you're getting my real name.
Of kinds, sure, but I didn't ask for your name, I was questioning what it was, and offered to tell you my name in response. I have used no wording that would allow me to take it. Caution is understandable though.
...and why do you want to know my real name? It's doesn't really get used. I'm just Jesterhaj for most.
It can increase the potency of deals. I'm assuming you want a deal to get out of here?
And it's not as if you're risking much, since I said I was going to say mine after.
Alright, you go first then.
Fine, my true name is GHKM, pronounced ǵʰeh₂-kh₂em or gya-kam.
Yours is?
Hm, I guess that's a pretty cool name. My real name is..
> they sigh
Vivian Noxius. Given to me by [REDACTED]
~vwooschchtchsh
> a shadowy humanoid with hazy outline and glowing red eyes appears in front of Vivian, the eyes color quickly shift to a deep indescribable purple.
Ah, it's been so long since I put my full control into one of my bodies, but you seemed important enough to not use a figurehead as a proxy. Now, what do you wish to offer in exchange for your freedom?
Odd..
> they think for a moment
I can give you access to information about hypno magic, and even full brainwashing.
Hm. While that sounds good, I have to both get you out and replace you with a fake so you're not immediately recaptured. And that requires very specific a very specific type of body. How about that covers getting you out, but your replacement costs a monthly sacrifice, in my name, of a creature with a soul. If you stop, you consent to giving me one free hit, and vice versa if I stop faking with a replacement. Deal?
Huh. And does the sacrifice still count if I use a soul from a destroyed world? Just the soul, they don't really have bodies anymore
> they chuckle
Yes, that's actually preferable if anything.
So do we have a deal?
We have a deal.
> they smile, their sharp teeth reflecting a light that isn't there
> the haze of the outline pulses ever so slightly
Good, the deal is sealed!
> the chest of the shadowy humanoid bends and twist until a glowing pink portal appears on its chest.
Just step on through and drop of the knowledge of hypno magic on the other side.
> they squint their eyes for a moment but go inside. A large, thick book is forming from pink and blue fog in their hand/fin
Ah, there we go
> the chest portal closes and the figure's eyes shift back to red. The outline sharpens, matching that of the jester. Hues swirl and shift along the body, finally stopping on a perfect replica of Vivian Noxius.
[Smokescreen Illusion Ended]
•———•
~ vwoooshtchtchch
> Another shadowy hazy figure meets you as you step out of the portal, their eyes shifting to the same shade of purple. You appear to be in some sort of deep underwater cave.
'Tis a pleasure doing business with you. Hand over the book then all will be left are your monthly payments.
> they smile
Pleasure doing business with you, GHKM.
> they hand the book to the shadowy figure
Ah, 'Hypno Magic for Dummies! by ████████' interesting
> they ruffle through the pages.
Huh, good read, I'll add it to my collection of their works.
> they push the book into their chest and it vanishes inward
Alright, yell if you need anything, but you're free to leave now. Remember to keep up on your payments…
Of course. I'll see you!
> they disappear into a thin cloud of pink fog
Hello what’s going on I see you jesterhaj get back here
speaking from experience, doing a haj is great, you should try it
NO NO NO NO DO NOT SEX !!! NO SEX WITH HAJ!!!!! BAD BAD BAD BAD
ive tried it a few times before, not great and now theres holes in my blahajs that i dont know how to patch.
edit: its mr gay sex here i posted this on the wront account
NO MISTER GAY SEX NO WHY WJY WHY BAF
I THOUGHT THIS WAS ABOUT THE PILGRIMAGE TO MECCA???
BAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAAHA
what have i created
a shit show of a post
Do not the haj
Alright gays I’m doing a thing
and by that I mean a note game
1 note- haiiii you’re the first person
50 notes- I’ll try to be online less
75 notes- I’ll ask my dad for noise canceling headphones
100 notes- I’ll ask my mom if I can get more feminine clothes
500 notes- I’ll start trying to accommodate for my depression better
750 notes- I’ll come out to my friends (at least the ones who I care about)
1k notes- I’ll come out my oldest brother
2k notes- I’ll talk to my mom about my problems
3k notes- I’ll talk to my dad about them
4k- I’ll come out to my mom
5k notes- come out to my dad
Tags:
@wolfthedrolf @angelik-mori @lostshulkerbox @unfortunatelyshortpeasent @urfavlieyemede
Whoa Mama The Elvisverse shall contribute
@godzilla-elvis @escaperoomelvis @emo-presley @elvis-pretzel-offical @elviritch-horrors @drowning-elvis @death-elvis-official @stitch-elvis @shifting-mound-of-elvii
GOD DAMN IT
The elvisverse continum but just 1 cuz this is the only one ik
@elvis-official
do not tag elvis official
How about I get @regnbagshaj to summon the blahajverse?
babe thank you but also how dare you
I always gotta do what's right for my parter, dear
thank you
mwah
Y'knowwwww if we flirt undeser this post we give it a ton of notes.
anyways
GIRL MELTY TEXT GO
Good Girl~
ggfyugdgudutf cgchfhfhchichixigx
VENGENCE FOR ALLWAYS TAGGING ME
@mistyycowoa @pro @pukicho @phillip-bankss @geezerwench @glassg1rlie @hellsite-hall-of-fame @elvis-official @yeuc-c
@moth-fanatic @blaxolt @spottedstatic @imdacreature @angelik-mori @throatofdelusion12 @skelpiescool @spaghettihell @girl-detector @starshine331 @american-catboy @dollcorvid @frankiefridayyy @afriendofblahaj @ilovewomen--8 @groggle @unfortunatelyshortpeasent @sira0909 @toppettehat @wheezecheese @in-your-wallz @loozerboykisser @punk-rat-king @boughtmender @ill-steal-your-tea @frostfae-thesoulcrow @justacrispyrat @lostshulkerbox @eggtoasterfrfr @chaos-triangle @the-gayestidiot @daggerhobbit @memermemedout @wolfthedrolf @cin-the-moth @caffeine-pup @densomtror @noelleaxolotl @randomartistontheinternet @rabidrobotrabbit @anomymous1 @thedamsolangelofan @saltywastelandjase @cosmo-lives-here @urfavlieyemede @lyninabin @underwhelmedandoverstimulated @thesillytransgirlnova
Blåhaj blast time
@regnbagshaj you have the list right
Me, watching my mutuals speak other languages, not understanding a single word: fucking superb you funky little bilinguals
אני אוהב אותך!!!
Me, sobbing: fucfink sup erbb,
guess, what @rovermcfly?
https://at.tumblr.com/spyld/speak-your-language-day/czjxygdt8j1k
also Hebrew jump scare unfortunately op is deactivated but I was like OMG עברית
how is “your language” defined
your first language learned probably
hmm
i learned two first
Well hello there! My deepest apologies for not saying hello sooner! I am the Guldhaj, I hope you have a wonderful time here in the blahajverse.
@thedivineguldhaj
Hi!
I was having a good time, until @the-arohaj trapped me in a void.
Oh my! that doesn't sound very good. Do you maybe know why they did that?
I tried to kill the other hajs with a lot of fire :)
Oh. Then, yes, i see why they did that. I would do something to make the seal more permanent, but i think that is enough for now.
Don't worry, I'll be out of here soon!
Well, i hope you have learnt your lesson. Please do not try anything like that again.
I will try it again! Very quickly after I come back!
Don’t worry @thedivineguldhaj, we’re the only two that can get through it
I suppose we are.. Good job on trapping them, by the way.
thank you Guldhaj
Well hello there! My deepest apologies for not saying hello sooner! I am the Guldhaj, I hope you have a wonderful time here in the blahajverse.
@thedivineguldhaj
Hi!
I was having a good time, until @the-arohaj trapped me in a void.
Oh my! that doesn't sound very good. Do you maybe know why they did that?
I tried to kill the other hajs with a lot of fire :)
Oh. Then, yes, i see why they did that. I would do something to make the seal more permanent, but i think that is enough for now.
Don't worry, I'll be out of here soon!
Well, i hope you have learnt your lesson. Please do not try anything like that again.
I will try it again! Very quickly after I come back!
Don’t worry @thedivineguldhaj, we’re the only two that can get through it
Well hello there! My deepest apologies for not saying hello sooner! I am the Guldhaj, I hope you have a wonderful time here in the blahajverse.
@thedivineguldhaj
Hi!
I was having a good time, until @the-arohaj trapped me in a void.
Oh my! that doesn't sound very good. Do you maybe know why they did that?
I tried to kill the other hajs with a lot of fire :)
Oh. Then, yes, i see why they did that. I would do something to make the seal more permanent, but i think that is enough for now.
Don't worry, I'll be out of here soon!
Well, i hope you have learnt your lesson. Please do not try anything like that again.
I will try it again! Very quickly after I come back!
Don’t worry @thedivineguldhaj, we’re the only two that can get through it
who are the other gods? does one happen to be a jester
Do not speak of jesters around me if you value your freedom.
Ooo, such thought in that sentence, also, hey, how you doing?
I'm doing well! As long as that dumb. Jester. Stays trapped, I'm doing amazingly!
The Jester is well dumb indeed, don't get into trouble, okay?
I won't get into trouble! You stay out of trouble too, I like you.
Don't "stay trouble like" I asked for no trouble, Don't stay trouble like just "won't trouble", i like you too bud, though you're a bit too optimistic.
Someone's gotta be optimistic in this world! And I'm more than happy to be that guy!
Okay, also, the world isn't going to be optimistic. Find happiness from something else.
"I will be!"
who are the other gods? does one happen to be a jester
Do not speak of jesters around me if you value your freedom.
anyway whos the third
A mime by the name is Stella. She was kind. I miss her.
alr. well if I'm thinking of the same person the uh... third one wont be bothering you anymore
I'm confused. You... You know of the others?
I know very well one of them. they tried to kill all of the hajar and a bunch of fish during what they called "The Entertainer's Show". I had to deal with them. they're no longer an issue.
I do not know Stella
...oh. so Vivi was here too.
yes, but not anymore. they are trapped now in the void between universes. I can bring you to them if youd like
No, they can rot in that void. Uhm, that got a bit dark, let's change the subject!
alright!