Monterey Bay Aquarium
Jimmy Eat World
d e v o n
❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
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2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
Doug Jones
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Game Changer & Make Some Noise
RMH
bliss lane
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h
Show & Tell
cherry valley forever
Mike Driver
Aqua Utopia｜海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
TMBGareOK. The Official They Might Be Giants tumblr
titsay
Love Begins
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@the-wet-coast
Over 200 followers!!
Thanks to all you amazing poly folks for following this blog! Moving into 2018, we wanna write more content for all of you to enjoy. For the celebration of 200, nudes!! We posted H's tits for 100 followers. She suggested I do a nude. Its up to you folks!! More of her nudie self or some of my lanky awkward goodness haha
Sad updates are sad
Haven't wanted to post this in a while cause it sucks. Our trouple dissolved. E and H are no longer together, tho I am still with E and H. Poly is still our life. Shit just happens sometimes right? Love you all T and H
Supporting polyamorous people means supporting all configurations. Deeming one configuration inherently better than others, poly-fidelity, hierarchical, egalitarian, is unfair to the genuine and supportive love in other kinds. It’s okay to feel uncomfortable, or to be confused, but if you decide that this is because they are wrong and that it is not because you have personal biases you are full of shit. Feeling uncomfortable is okay, you can work through that. Being cruel and treating certain relationships as inferior is wrong.
YES!!!!! - H
This.
I love it
Love this -T
Watch: These cute animations teach consent in the simplest terms.
The butt clenching 😂😩😩
the angry titty tho
the pitter patter of the ball-steps 😭😂
I love this! -T
Happy poly moment
Laying in bed, in the same room as my loves. They are in another bed, fooling around and we are all giggling at their silliness ❤❤❤
How The Fuck Will We All Fit On This Twin Size Dorm Bed- a novel by us five poly college students
Poly problems!!!
How will 3 of us live together with a queen size bed! Also Poly problems -T
REAL LIFE: Poly edition
Truth -T
I’m lying in bed next to my partner, eating a chocolate covered marshmallow that my housemate/maybe metamour made for my daughter’s tea party. She is taking my daughter on an exciting outing, so it seems like a good time to remind myself that this is two loving families merging, at least in the temporary, and not a hostile takeover of mine. I need to stop keeping track of all the things she’s better at than me, and work on my own strengths, as well as self esteem, and enjoy the vast amount of love that lives in this house.
Thank you for being a great mom, a fantastic friend, a domestic goddess, and an adorable meta. We are so lucky to have you.
I’m so happy to be a part of your life and household! Weinerburger family!!
So beautiful to see these folks happy!!
When in a triad, how do you deal with the irrational jealousy or feeling of exclusion when two of your partners are together separately? How do you deal with knowing that the 2 people you love are being intimate, but you have to go out or be responsible or whatever, just not able to stay with them... am I wrong to feel insecure based on that? I love and trust them both, but worry that my insecurity will be an issue.
I think I was more envious than jealous. Which are similar feelings.Ask yourself. Am I upset they're spending time being intimate at all?Or are you just upset that they're being intimate while you're not able to? More like a fear of missing out?When we all first got together I was slightly worried at times that they had better sex than either had with me, but I was just insecure and I got over it through self reflection and patience and as our relationship grew over time that all melted away.-T
other poly bloggers seem to really emphasis that their relationships have little to do with sex and I’m over here just being the hypersexual aromantic opposite
Kudos! Sometimes I think people downplay the importance of sex in their relationships because of trying to combat sex-negative slut-shaming stereotypes that come from monogamous culture. Trying to show how “normal” or “boring” poly relationships are is part of that, and I think there’s some value in trying to reach certain people that way, but I also think that strategy is limited and has downsides (see: playing along with the sex-negativity). I don’t talk about sex a lot on this blog because it’s completely public. I’ve told all my Facebook friends about it. For all I know, my family is reading this (which is fine! hi, family!), but I don’t talk to my family about my sex life. That being said, I think anyone would raise an eyebrow at the way some poly people downplay sex in their relationships. I think everyone realistically knows that with the exception of asexual people, most people who have people in their lives who they call “partners” are at least sometimes having sex with those people. I don’t want to protest too hard with the “we’re just like you, it’s almost like we’re so close to monogamous that we might as well be having sex with just one person! I swear the idea of having sex with multiple people almost never even occurred to me when I decided to pursue polyamorous relationships!” – because I think most people see through that, and it’s disingeuous to pretend that sex (again, for allosexual people) has nothing to do with it. Yes, polyamory can offer opportunities for meaningful romantic/qp non-sexual relationships for allosexual and asexual people alike. I appreciate the way that polyamory lets people expand their ideas of what relationships might look like, regarding sex as well as many other things. But I’m not totally sold on the “we must pretend sex has NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS REALLY” angle.
I dig this.
We mostly leave out sexual content in our blogs because we like to have a more accessible place for people to learn and share together.
From my personal perspective it goes without saying that the three of us have all kinds of amazing sex together 😍😍😍🏳️🌈
As the saying in poly goes "it's not always about the sex, But sometimes it is about the sex"
❤️-T
Why I Came Out As Poly
- Because I’m not ashamed of being polyamorous, and anyone who thinks that I should be doesn’t need to be in my life.
- Because I want acceptance and understanding of polyamory, and that will only happen once monogamous people begin to realize that healthy non-monogamous relationships are not only possible but prevalent.
- Because I don’t want to hide my excitement about anyone who isn’t my husband, and I don’t want to have to refer to a partner as being nothing more than a friend. I do not want to diminish any relationships outside of my marriage by being secretive.
- Because I do not want people to mistakenly believe that I support infidelity or deceit.
- Because there is nothing more satisfying than being unapologetically me.
The evolution of asking
As primary and married partners, we have always asked “Is it ok if………”
On the surface, this seems to satisfy several good needs:
1. It’s polite to keep the other aware of developments, plans and the evolution of friendships, especially during periods of NRE
2. It allows the other to express any concerns, or potential issues that might not have yet been considered.
3. It allows for an “enthusiastic” yes, and an opportunity to be clear of a partner’s support and even excited compersion.
Well, it’s polite, at least, the second one is more difficult, and the third even more so.
Over time, our filters, baggage, grudges, and even traumas somehow got wrapped up into this simple question.
Why?
I think that first of all, the “asking” part has to go. “Is it ok……” is a yes or no question. It’s either yes, or no. A no is a veto. A yes can range from an enthusiastic yes to a hesitant “i guess so”. If it’s for something a few days or weeks down the schedule, that might allow for some discussion and mutual understanding.
If it’s a rapidly evolving NRE opportunity, then the idea of consent from the uninvolved partner is strained. Yes or no.
Do we need the consent of our primary?
Are we actually asking consent? Or are we asking for the blessing of the other–the release from the guilt and awkward feelings that comes with spending our limited time on/with/under someone other than our primary?
Go forth and interact! Go forth and date! Go forth and fuck! You’ve been set free from what holds you back. Enjoy. Tell me all about it before the window of opportunity closes.
We take advantage of the yes. But when it’s less than an enthusiastic yes, it becomes less worth taking advantage of the yes and doing anything.
“Is it ok?” is a bad question as you say since it forces a binary answer. It puts a lot of pressure on the on the person being asked. If they say “no” then they are the bad guy/girl and risk coming off as being controlling or quashing the other person’s fun and opportunities. If they say “yes” and don’t really mean, or have concerns, then they feel like they’ve been pressured into giving into something that they weren’t 100% ok with. Any attempt later to discuss negative feelings might be met with “but you said it was OK!”
Our therapist taught us that instead of asking “Is it OK” to try asking “How do you feel about this?” instead. That allows for a much more nuanced answer. The person being asked can say “That doesn’t bother me at all!” or “I have these concerns” or “I’m worried about this aspect” which can then lead to further discussion. The person being asked is only responsible for honestly describing their feelings - the final agency for making the decision as to whether proceed or not still lies with the person doing the asking.
Useful. Reblogging for the comments
*unless you want to get freaky
;) - H
Boundary Myths
Myth: If I set Boundaries, I’m being selfish. Fact: Appropriate boundaries actually increase our ability to care about others.
Myth: Boundaries are a sign of disobedience. Fact: A lack of boundaries is often a signal of disobedience. People who have shaky limits are often compliant on the outside, but rebellious and resentful on the inside.
Myth: If I begin setting boundaries, I will be hurt by others. Fact: Boundaries are a litmus test for the quality of our relationships. Those people in our lives who can respect our boundaries will love our wills, our opinions, our separateness.
Myth: If I set boundaries, I will hurt others. Fact: Boundaries are not an offensive weapon; boundaries are a defensive tool. Appropriate boundaries don’t control, attack, or hurt anyone. They simply prevent injury.
Myth: Boundaries mean that I am angry. Fact: Anger tells us that a boundary has been violated. This is generally not new anger, it’s old anger. It’s often years of no’s that were never voiced, never respected, and never listened to.
Myth: When others set boundaries, it injures me. Fact: An inability to accept other’s boundaries can indicate a problem in taking responsibility. Fact: Past, inappropriate boundaries set on us as children can injure us.
Myth: Boundaries cause feelings of guilt. Fact: We need to distinguish between those who give to get and those who truly give. Fact: Just because we have received something doesn’t mean we owe something.
Myth: Boundaries are permanent, and I’m afraid of burning my bridges. Fact: You own your boundaries. They don’t own you. Fact: If you set limits with someone, and they respond in a mature and loving way, you can negotiate the boundary.
Could & Townsend, 1992, ps. 103-120
Communication
“When we talk about communication in polyamory, we’re actually talking about a very specific type of communication: speaking the truth about ourselves, our needs and our boundaries with honesty and precision, and listening with grace when our partners speak of themselves, their needs and their boundaries. This kind of communication isn’t really about words. It’s about vulnerability, self-knowledge, integrity, empathy, compassion and a whole lot of other things.”
Truth, and sometimes being vulnerable like that is HARD! But nobody said that polyamory was going to be easy...
- H
Communicate!
Communicate Communicate Communicate Communicate Communicate Communicate Communicate Communicate Communicate Communicate Communicate Communicate Communicate Communicate Communicate Communicate Communicate Communicate Communicate Communicate Communicate Communicate Communicate Communicate That is all. - H
