Hello, we are the Operating System! Our hobbies include coding, writing, art, music, singing, reading and a whole lot more!
We're a plural system and label ourselves median. We're all individuals to varying degrees and have a collective identity we all at least somewhat identify with. We use both we/us and I/me to refer to the more singlet-end of things.
(I/me usually indicates a very solid part of collective identity, "thinking as one", whereas we/us is usually indicative of a decision made by consensus)
We're fine with being addressed collectively (singular he/him or plural they/them, you can call me/us "Curse" or "The Operating System").
Since this blog has been gaining some traction due to a few posts, I'd also like to add that we're a relatively newly discovered system and are by no means an authority on anything. We're just here to hang out.
This intro post changes frequently because, unsurprisingly, we don't have a very consistent way of presenting ourselves :)
Who I am/who we are:
🪷 Origami (he/it) - Shell headmate. Something like a core, but on the outside instead of in the inside :)
🎨 Tams (she/her) - Chronic yapper, social funnyman, very proud. Likes art, clothes and expressing herself.
🖥️ Green (he/him) - Programming guy, gamedev nerd. Loves his numbers, post-rock and locking the fuck in on a task. And the color green.
🔆 Orange (he/him? we don't think he cares) - That's him on the banner image. Compassion incarnate. Likes discussing, supporting and debating.
🍇 Indigo (he/him) - Horny jail. Most interconnected member of the system, because apparently that trait is what unites us all.
☕ Autumn (she/her) - She who manages the pain. Very to-the-point and can come off as a bit cold or rude. Could always use coffee and some ibuprofen.
🌿 Mist (she/her) - Quiet headmate who nonetheless likes to post. Typically uses minimal or simple words.
🧯 Syph (he/him) - Load-bearing people pleaser. The responsible one.
🎸 Seth (he/him) - The devil on our shoulder who keeps telling us that "trying to cut your own hair is a good idea, actually" - Update: we cut our hair and it's great. Syph would disagree but I am like the secondary character telling the bookworm protagnosit to go to parties and live a little
🗡️ Alex (he/him) - Introject and not happy about it. slowly embracing the cringe. Every time I cringe at myself I become more powerful. You cannot contain me anymore.
+ others, who either don't front very frequently or don't care to be included here.
Genuinely bad part of plurality is the weird reverse dysphoria I get being in a predominantly transmasc body :(
I didn't like our adult appearance even before we transitioned so it's not like that part is a big deal, but it kind of sucks that I'll never feel at home in it . Oh the eternal longing to be 10 years old again
I miss our voice though . I know it made the guys really dysphoric, but that part did feel like me still .
I guess it's going to be even worse when we start getting old for real . Ow :(
If there's anything plurality has made me realize it's that nobody actually has a perfectly consistent state of self, it's all a ploy by Big Singlet to sell LESS pronouns. it's cuz they're shorting the market y'see
Yeah, this is us, exactly! We are all each other to the degree, that we often re-cast memories one headmate fronted for as belonging to another.
We're all kinda one eighth to seven eighths of a person each. A lot of us will never have opinions on a bunch of stuff, because they don't happen to be aspects of life we interact with. Damn, if I didn't have he other guys I might have to develop a personality god forbid
Every time I wake up I have this really profound, vivid and urgent feeling that I am someone, I know something and there is something I must do and then I finish waking up and it's gone
It's like swimming towards the surface of the water and taking a breath
some people like to offer help with labels and frameworks - this is even core of some origin-based discourse arguments in particular , that anyone who label plurality as not based in trauma simply do not remember . of course there is truth behind idea that first label is not necessarily correct label , and sometimes might need pointers to grasp full range of possibilities . but , this can be incredibly easy to overstep and do more harm than good .
if member of friend's collective talk about personal memories of sourceworld / homeworld , unaware of possibility that this could reflect collective trauma , in some cases fair to bring this up . but if friend reject this idea , then any attempts to push as part of collective trauma will likely hurt immensely .
in one outcome , might be right , and now force collective to confront something that did not have means to be ready for . in another outcome , might be completely wrong , and now everyone feel less safe to discuss personal lives and experiences . in yet another outcome , might lead to exploration of entirely false traumas , destabilise sense of reality , and throw even genuine memories into question . none of this is favour .
this go in all directions . if member of friend's collective talk about homesickness for fictional place , then hard push towards spirit travel could result in genuine danger - whether through destabilise sense of reality , or attempts to explore metaphysicality without necessary precautions . even if spirit travel would be viable and helpful tool , forceful introduction rightfully turn away .
know how to introduce possibilities for those who might need help to understand , but also take responsibility to step back and stop . even if absolutely and entirely right about change of framework , which is not always outcome , will often severely damage relationship - and even willingness to explore at all - if try to push exploration .
leave openness to explore , to be wrong , and to adjust approach wherever necessary . do not treat other people as puzzle which need solve .
I completely agree with the collective trauma part. I think people tend to become so overly focused on knowing the "truth" and correcting others that they forget that sometimes it's a useless or even harmful endeavor.
Denial and metaphorical thinking (eg. in the way the memories of our fictives mirror real trauma our body experienced) can genuinely be useful tools for coping. And when people pry too much or say things like "Oh, you do this thing because of that other thing that happened to you in the past, I've figured you out" it gets really uncomfortable really quickly.
That's not to say that all denial all the time is good, but it bears acknowledging that nobody has the energy to have a breakdown every day. You need to work, eat and rest, which is very difficult if you're constantly anxious or triggered. Being pushy about someone else's denial or memory barriers is a very very bad thing to do.
The false memory thing is a very real concern, too. In our experience, our brain would just rather invent an equivalent trauma from whole cloth rather than face the real thing head-on.
I'd post more about plural stuff, but I've been very not stressed so headmate differences are almost completely unnoticeable lol
That being said, it has been very Autumn-coded lately, but in like a tinted kinda way. So shout out to me for fronting (kinda) for something other than searing pain
